Chapter 10

'Business or pleasure Sheriff?'

He was wearing dark grey sweatpants and a white singlet. If she wasn't so lost, she would have stopped to admire his chest. Remembering exactly how it felt with a clarity she was ashamed to admit to. She could only see one of his hands, knowing the other was palming a gun behind the door. She sniffed and let the closest thing to a laugh she could manage out.

'That's the million dollar question isn't it? Because it's not business. But it's not pleasure because that would be saying that seeing you is pleasurable, when really all it is is stressful and really kind of surreal -'

'You've been crying'

She heard the gun be dropped on the small table just inside as he moved out of the doorway towards her. At that she did laugh. She wiped the left over damp skin under her eyes at the same moment he pulled on her jacket, leading her into him.

'What happened Althea? You never cry'

'Nothing I'm not crying. I'm just...fuck'

Strong arms pulled her against his chest and for the first time in 6 months she took a real breath. This wasn't getting her any closer to seeing clearly, but she'd be damned if lost didn't feel like the safest thing to be when she felt her skin against his.

'Shit. Shhhhh. Slow down and breathe for me. What happened?'

'I'm fine honestly. It's just.. A lot.. Being back here. And this was the only place I could go to. Nothing happened. Being back here isn't as clear as I hoped it would be'

She took another deep breath and pulled away from his embrace, after a seconds hesitation he relented and let her step back.

'I'm sorry to just turn up here. First day back wasn't a cake walk I guess'

'It's okay. But come inside yeah? It's fucking freezing'

She let him lead her into his apartment without a second thought, his hands never leaving her. He pushed a tumbler of scotch into her hands faster than she though possible. And opened the cupboard that contained a second one for himself, and poured. He brushed a piece of hair that had fallen forwards and she shivered under his touch. It was this side that she disintegrated under. This soft melting side he showed no one. The side that had him holding her when she thrashed in her sleep, that had him setting coffee for her when he left before she woke. The side that had him breathing in her skin like incense and waking up constantly just to make sure he was still holding her.

'Drink. You'll feel better. Or so I tell myself when I drink. Yah really are okay?'

'Yeah. Just a rough day. I'm really sorry to turn up here'

He waved off her second apology. And refilled her glass.

'I take it yah met our new Sheriff?'

'Huh yeah. I did. He didn't take long to tell me exactly where I stand in his eyes, or at least my former deputy's didnt'

'Don't feel too special, he did the same to me. Although he was probably at least more subtle with you hey? Guessin a cop garners more respect than a criminal'

His joke fell flat when she replied with a shake of her head and a drink.

'Pretty much called me a whore. Or at least implied it, I guess I didn't do myself any favours by coming here though. Jesus how did I get here?'

'What the fuck did he say to yah?!'

'Nothing I didn't deserve. Forget it. Can we just drink?'

He paused, holding her eyes and she watched the anger that had risen slowly fade, as though he didn't really want to let it go but was doing so because she asked. She took the step forward into speaking, just wanting to hear his voice respond.

'So this is weird. I really didn't think we'd be back here'

'Yeah. I guess it kinda is. It's not like much has changed though. You'll find your feet here. If anyone can its you. Must be strange though, being back after the craziness of New York, I can imagine that it was different working there to good old Charming'

'You wouldn't have to imagine if you read my letters...'

'Aye. Guess you're right. But I didn't leave did I? You made that play Ally'

'Would things be different if I had stayed?

'It's hard ta say isn't it? But there's no point killing ourselves over it now. It's done'

The finality beneath that statement twisted into her chest. Was it really done? She felt the familiar heat on her eyes but held it off. She couldn't really be surprised here.

'Why'd you leave Ally? I mean, I know what happened between us was a car crash. But in the end? Was it just about the club. Is that all it was?'

'No. It wasn't. In all honestly? I could never imagine having you without imagining losing you, to the club, or another woman, or your inevitable lack of interest. I guess I trusted you about as much as I should, which could be another way of saying I wonder if I ever did. But by the time that I realised I could still be me, and be here, with you, it was too late. That's why I wrote to you'

He didn't reply immediately. The heaviness of her words layering between them.

'I know. I'm not bitter anymore, I know what we had was a Hail Mary at trying to make something work. I don't know what's supposed to happen now. I didn't think you'd ever come back. You know, I've had this for 36 hours now, maybe giving me a little room wouldn't be totally out of line yeah?'

'I've known I was coming back for 2 weeks now, and I'm still no closer to knowing what's supposed to happen here. Take all the time you need. If you figure it out before I do, let me know'

'I will darlin. Drink'

She finished her glass. And stood to leave. She needed to get home before she caved and admitted how much she'd missed him, how the sound of his voice and the heat of his presence, felt better than any drug she'd tried.

'Where do yah think you're going? You're not driving in your condition Sheriff'

'I'm hardly drunk Telford. And you've seen me drunk'

'You've had a few and you're higher strung than yah usually are. And that's sayin something. Just crash here. I'll keep my hands to myself, Scouts honour'

'You were a Boy Scout?'

She raised an eyebrow at the comment. But couldn't help the warm feeling that coursed through her at the idea of sleeping next to him. A warmth that overshadowed the part of her that knew it was a dangerous move.

'Thanks, I... I really appreciate it'

'You've done the same for me'

He flicked the kitchen light off behind them and walked towards his bedroom.

In the bathroom she slid out of her uniform and stared at herself in the mirror. In just a singlet and cotton underwear, heading into bed with Filip Telford. She was right when she spoke to him yesterday, some things never change. She walked out to his bedroom and saw Chibs already in bed, sitting up against the headboard. She got in next to him and took a deep breath, she knew she shouldn't, but she felt more relaxed, more able to sleep, than she had since she left Charming. The sounds of his slow deep breathing easing her into it even faster. Here they were again.