Stephanie
Maybe I am being selfish. Just working for Ranger would be a lot safer then working at the bond's office. I love my job but life is not about me anymore. It is about Gabriella. I do not deserve Ranger's help. I sigh and enter the office
"where's the kid?" asked Connie.
I shrug and sit on the couch
"we are living at Range Man now"
Connie raises an eyebrow but says nothing
"Ranger is watching her?" I nod
"he has been great with her"
"well he is a father"
"anything new?" I ask
"oh Mario Petros skipped bail. His charge is a DUI"
she hands me a file. He is a 76 old man who lives in the building across the street from my old one "should be easy" she nods
"well with you, you never know"
"ahaha" she gives me a small smile
"how's mother hood?"
"I have no idea what I am doing" I confess
"I do not want to be like my mother at all. I want to support her, and it turns out she is a genius child so she will be smarter than me any day now. I'm basically depending on Ranger to take the lead with parenting which is not fair to him"
"but he is taking that roll on himself, you're not forcing him"
I sit back down
"I know"
Connie gets up from her desk and gets us both some coffee.
"you just need to take it one day at a time, the great secret of motherhood is winging it"
I chuckle
"not for my mother"
she rolls her eyes
"she wanted to be a stay at home mother, you did not"
"I feel guilt almost every time I look at her, I didn't want her but I am glade she is here now"
I love my child but I still feel that I am not enough
"like I said one day at a time"
I nod and Lula comes in the office
"morning, where's my coffee"
she goes to the coffee machine
"wanna rise shot gun with me to pick up this guy?" I ask her
"fucking A, just let me get this coffee to go"
at least this part of my life is still the same.