The voices told him that he was failing.
Don't get too close. Keep them at the foot of your paw. They aren't like you. Don't waste your time.
For the most part, Crowpaw listened to it. That primal urgency, the tremor in his blood. But he hadn't done anything wrong, surely. All he had done was hunt with a cat he was pretty much forced with! He didn't trust them! It was just another thing he had to put up with in order to get to where he wanted to be. You couldn't achieve anything without a little sacrifice.
He told himself that he was merely tolerating them. He was Windclan, they were not. That was enough for him to form a barrier. The only cats you could trust were your own, that was a simple enough lesson. One of the first that Onewhisker had taught him!
That was why he kept to himself, resigned at the back of the group when they travelled, made sure to let them know that his ideas were better than theirs! He didn't need to care what they thought of him, it didn't matter; if they bit, he would bite back twice as hard. He would let them know that he was here out of necessity for his clan, not in order to make friends he didn't want.
That's what made those two mollies' so frustrating.
He wished so much that Feathertail was one of those fake types of cats, the one's that purr and coddle when they need to look good but turn as cold as ice when they don't think anyone's looking! He wanted nothing more than a good reason to hate her!
But unfortunately, she was one of the friendliest cats he'd ever met! Always smiling, always gentle, always asking what the group, what he, thought before ever considering her own opinion. The only time she was ever defensive was when Stormfur was involved, but even then that cat kept to himself considerably well, so that was a rare occurrence itself.
Worst of all, out of every cat, she was the one who didn't take Crowpaw's words to heart. She didn't take any of his snarls in general, only replying with a soft smile and a sweet purr. Even now, as they travelled, she stuck the closest to Crowpaw, now and again ushering him with a kind look to just see how he was doing.
Just smile. Friendly.
Not like you. Never will be. Only a fool. She is only Riverclan.
He had to turn to make the voices stop.
He couldn't fall into some trap. When everything was said and done, they would go their separate ways. There was no need to make that harder than it should be.
That's why he was glad that he hated the ginger one.
She got the idea! Different clans, different natures, incompatible personalities. That cat was just as irritating and grating as Crowpaw needed her to be. They would fight, and the voices would keep quiet, satisfied that he was keeping to the natural order. Tear and claw until you're ripped from the other, that was what it was meant to be like.
Both would start fights that would create more friction, then the others would get riled up and normally take Squirrelpaw's side. Not like he cared.
He didn't want their praise; he didn't want their friendship.
They were enemies and that was how it needed to stay.
It was fine until they actually praised his catch and Crowpaw couldn't ignore what a blatant lie that was. They'd looked to him with respect; the respect of another clan, whas it meant to feel so good when you gained that?
And to add insult to injury, he wasn't able to ignore how little he actually hated Squirrelpaw after they went hunting.
Why? Why had he told her about his father? At the time it had just come out. She had asked after all, albeit it in order to scold him, but he gave back an answer. And like the irritating cat she was, the fur-ball actually apologised to him! And he accepted it! Why? He hated feeling like he was being pitied, he was almost a warrior for Starclan's sake! But he accepted her apology, allowed her to remove herself from any guilt. That was practically being kind to her!
Then they'd worked together. Acted like they were common hunting partners. Let them both share responsibility for the catch. It was just quick thinking. It was a fluke, I wanted to catch it. Liar. I don't need Thunderclan praise, I was only feeling sorry for her. Whatever he told himself couldn't stop the fact that they had worked together.
And that had made Squirrelpaw not want to fight so much anymore.
She walked by Feathertail, laughing with the molly at some bad joke. It had seemed that she had actually made a friend. And travelling since that morning, Squirrelpaw had said nothing to provoke the tom, she kept to the others, sprightly meowing and pouncing around, mostly bragging about the kill.
Making sure to include Crowpaw in her stories the whole time.
"And then, just as it was about to escape, Crowpaw is in front of it like a lightning bolt!" She exclaimed, offering an exaggerated pounce as she retold the story to Feathertail and Stromfur. They both grinned at her, happy to let her enjoy herself in the memory. "So, it starts pounding away, straight to my jaws!" Squirrelpaw smirked, her tail swiping the air proudly. "I'd caught it before it could blink!"
"You know that story does actually get better after the fifth time." Stormfur meowed, laughing with the apprentice.
Feathertail playfully nudged her brother with her tail. "I was thinking the same thing. It was certainly a good meal; I know that much!"
Squirrelpaw flushed with pride, her ears up at the praise. "Thank you. Your mice were great as well!" She said genuinely.
That was true enough, no matter how big they prey were, Crowpaw couldn't deny that the mice had been fresh and warm in flavour! Feathertail was too shy to take pride in that though.
Feathertail looked back at Crowpaw, "It was a great plan, Crowpaw!"
Again, with that smile. Crowpaw shut it out with a grunt of acknowledgement. "Any trained warrior would do the same thing."
Crowpaw's ears perked when Squirrelpaw chuckled shrewdly, "Trained… Right?"
Both Feathertail and Stromfur glanced at the apprentice in confusion, and Crowpaw felt a horrified chill race across his pelt at the thought that Squirrelpaw was going to reveal his mistake when he tripped! He would never be able to live down the thought of every clan knowing he had made an apprentice's mistake!
His eyes darted at her, she was turned, looking him over with a half-lidded gaze and a knowing smirk. Crowpaw'e eyes narrowed. See, she'll humiliate you. You can't trust Thunderclan. You can't trust anyone! Crowpaw felt his claws unsheathe, his muscles tense, ready to succumb to the voices.
Playfully, she winked at him, before cutting the subject short with a dismissive flick of her head. It seemed to be enough for the others, who looked at each other, then shrugging it off and continuing ahead.
The voices closed off like they had been buried under the Earth. Crowpaw sheathed his claws, astonishment clenching his belly. The Squirrelpaw he had met the first time would have indulged in embarrassing him and would have done the most taunting for certain. Was she hoping to blackmail him? The voices told him that; it was only for her benefit, not his, she hoped to use him.
Crowpaw noticed that the voices were quieter now. Easier to ignore.
They had been crossing a field full of sheep for a good while now, the air stunk of the creatures and Crowpaw could tell everyone was growing weary in their own way. Brambleclaw and Tawnypelt were at the front, seeming to be snapping at each other slightly as they kept staring ahead towards more hills. The others were obviously trying to keep in good spirits, and Crowpaw guessed Squirrelpaw's stories were engaging enough to pass the time slightly.
The Windclan apprentice kept to himself, occasionally sniffing the air to see if there was anything that indicated they would be leaving the field soon. Nothing was hinting at that so far. He looked around the fields taking it in. How far were they from the forest now? He stared at the sheep, all staring stupidly at the passing cats, if this was the first time they'd ever seen a cat the group must have been in unknown territory for warriors.
It was frightening in more ways than one, but Crowpaw knew he had to push those fears down and work to represent his clan. Represent his…
A cloud came over his mind when he thought of his father. Squirrelpaw had told him how Firestar was a pain in how he always seemed to find her. She didn't realise how lucky she actually was. Her father was leader of the clan and found a way to make tie for her every day. His father had been Deputy and Crowpaw could barely remember him coming home most days!
What excuse did Deadfoot have?
Even when he came back in the dream, he had spoken of prophecies, of him being the choice, of whoever or whatever Midnight was; Crowpaw wanted more than that. An explanation, an apology, how about treating him like his son rather than just any cat! Sure, the others may have taken the vague explanation from the ghosts that had no relation to them, but Deadfoot was Crowpaw's father! Didn't Crowpaw deserve more than unclear words and his father fading away like a nightime mist?
Deadfoot owed him so much more.
But Crowpaw would hold that back for now, he'd do it for his clan. They mattered more to him than that ghost ever did.
Suddenly, Crowpaw yowled in pain as a paw batted him against the ear. "What's with that look?" Came Squirrelpaw's voice, loud and intrusive.
Crowpaw turned to her, snarling. "That hurt!"
"It wasn't meant to…much." Squirrelpaw meowed cheekily, she walked close to him, her posture not radiating the animosity it may have before. "You weren't listening to me when I was right next to you. I had to do something."
Crowpaw cursed, he was so focused being angry on his father he hadn't noticed her. "You could have used your tail."
"Well, I didn't." Squirrelpaw grinned, "So, what were you thinking about? You looked like you'd just come out of a thorn bush."
Crowpaw's eyes flashed at her, there was no way he was going to reveal anymore than he already had about his father. "Nothing."
"Nothing?" Squirrelpaw said, unconvinced, "Nothing must upset you if you're going to be so stone faced about it." When he didn't respond, she shook her head with a smile. "Don't worry. I'm not going to tell them."
Crowpaw glanced up at her, "Tell them what?"
Squirrelpaw leant in closer, her fur almost close enough to meet his. Crowpaw stiffened. "How you got a mouthful of dirt and grass." She whispered, ducking with a laugh as Crowpaw swung lightly at her.
"Oh, shut up." Crowpaw hissed, keeping his voice low enough to not alarm the others. He didn't want to take any chances.
Squirrelpaw stretched her forepaws, still smirking up at him. "You're as touchy as a kit near a beehive. Look, every cat slips up once, it's not a crime!"
Crowpaw glared at her, "Are you going to forget about it then?"
Squirrelpaw made a show to look like she was thinking about it, then pouted mockingly at him. "Probably not, no."
She wasn't provocative, but she was still an obnoxious mange-pelt.
"Mouse-brain." Crowpaw muttered.
"Crowfood." Squirrelpaw shot back cheekily. Crowpaw couldn't find the energy to argue back. They walked by each other in brief silence, making Crowpaw hope for the best, but Squirrelpaw inevitably opened her jaws again.
"So, what do you think the prophecy is?" Squirrelpaw asked, "What important task could Starclan have in mind for us?"
Wasn't that the big question. "I don't know." Crowpaw said, "Guess we'll have to find out when we find this Midnight they mentioned. I thought your clanmate had seen the place?" Crowpaw said with a roll of his eyes. It still didn't make sense that Brambleclaw of all cats had a second dream about the journey.
Squirrelpaw huffed, "He knows as much as any of us. Don't be jealous." She didn't sound like she was defending Brambleclaw, more it seemed she was just scolding Crowpaw.
The tom shot up with a hiss, "Jealous? Of him? Don't make me laugh."
The Thunderclan apprentice sniffed, glancing at him around the corner of her eye. "You're so obvious." She said dryly.
"I'm not." Crowpaw pressed but Squirrelpaw ignored him. He wasn't jealous. There wasn't anything to be jealous of. All Brambleclaw had done was claim to have a dream, that wasn't much. He was still just a warrior who had taken over the role of leader without anyone really consenting to it, much less Crowpaw. If that Thunderclan cat thought that Crowpaw was going to take orders from him, he was crazier than he looked.
"You two aren't fighting again, are you?" Feathertail had paused to walk with the two, paddling by Squirrelpaw. "You two were doing so well." She said with mock sadness.
Squirrelpaw laughed, "Not arguing, just Crowpaw being mouse-brained."
Growling, Crowpaw pierced the apprentice with a blue scowl. Feathertail seemed to sense the growing irritation and quickly cut him off.
"So, when we stop, do you guys want to go hunting again?"
"It sounds fine by me!" Squirrelpaw meowed, her pelt fluttering at the thought of fresh prey. "Some of us will have to catch prey for those lazy cats in front."
Feathertail shrugged, "Maybe we can all do it together this time. One of you could join up with Stormfur or Brambleclaw?"
"Are those two any good at hunting?" Crowpaw snapped. He needed to shut that idea down; it was getting too far. The voices came loud and taunting. The molly was beginning to think the impossible, and it was up to Crowpaw to bring her back to reality.
"Yes." Feathertail said, frowning.
Squirrelpaw squinted and craned her head to the side, "Meh."
It didn't matter, he wasn't planning to know much more about them than that. That was all the information he needed. He'd sooner throw himself to a fox than go hunting with Brambleclaw. And Stormfur…
Well, he just didn't really care.
The cool grass made it easier for Crowpaw to keep himself calm, "They can ask, I'll say no." He ignored the crease on Feathertail's brow, the raised eye of Squirrelpaw. Keep to yourself. Keep them out.
"But Squirrelpaw has told everyone about how well your hunt went," Feathertail got an idea and tried appealing to his ego. "You could probably teach them a thing or two."
Tempting. But an obvious trick. "I thought you said they were good enough."
"We can all learn something." Squirrelpaw said snidely, looking away when Crowpaw gave her a dangerous stare.
Feathertail spoke up again, "I'm only saying I think I'd enjoy hunting with either of you two, personally. I'd like to see what you two can teach me, and if we get to any rivers or streams, I'd be happy to teach you two how to catch a fish properly."
Squirrelpaw let out a mewl of delight! "I'd love that! I've never caught one before!" She turned to him smiling, "Have you, Crowfood?" She used that stupid nickname, but Crowpaw noticed that behind it there was no malice.
"No." There were hardly ever chances to fish in Windclan.
The Thunderclan apprentice nudged him playfully with her tail, "Then you can learn as well, get some more skills into that Bat-blind head of yours." Crowpaw may have retorted that, but in her eyes, he saw she wasn't trying to insult him. His eyes widened in horror; she was playing with him!
She didn't wait for the tom to respond, turning back to Feathertail and loudly discussing her hunting advice on how to catch a rabbit. Feathertail listened the whole time, even when Squirrelpaw was clearly exaggerating. They spoke so friendly to each other. Their clans didn't matter to them in the slightest. They already looked like good friends. It made Crowpaw's head spin; did these two actually think they could carry on like this when they were back in the forest? What was the point? It was only going to end in heartache.
But it wasn't just the two of them Feathertail was talking about. Despite everything, it seemed they wished to include him as well. Befriend him.
They're foolish. You know better than them. You know. You know you can't trust them.
Crowpaw inhaled desperately. What they were doing was impossible, dangerous sometimes. He couldn't be a part of that. He never wanted to be a part of that. The voices were pounding against him, inside his head, against his spine, every urge he had as a member of Windclan. The cats were swimming in deep water, and he couldn't let them pull him into the maelstrom.
Go on! Tell them! Let them know where your loyalties lie! Make them realise that you will never be their friend. They are only a situational circumstance. Nothing more and never will be. Scream. Shout. Tear. Claw. Just make them leave you alone!
Every hair on his pelt rose in adrenaline, a furious madness bubbled inside his eyes, the voices fed the fire that begged for him to put an end to this stupid game. Crowpaw inhaled tightly, blocking out their smiles. Ready to scream. His mouth opened-
"Hey, there's a thunderpath ahead!" Stormfur's shout cut into the madness.
The two mollies rushed ahead in wonder and relief, Feathertail called for Crowpaw's still shaking pelt to hurry up. Gulping down his resolution for now, he followed.
The stench of the thunderpath seemed to calm Crowpaw a little. The voices still screamed for him to erupt. Crowpaw let them drift into a haze. They could wait. The journey was his priority, and that priority now included the stinking thunderpath, barking dogs, and the ugly chirps of twoleg kits.
…
The barking of the dog nipped at Crowpaw's tail, with a burst of adrenaline he darted around the edge of a high fence, crawling underneath the wooden frame quickly, he darted across a flat line of hard grass, before bursting into a bush surrounded by a patch of strange blue flowers. Feeling soil against his paws, he nestled inside the bush, sucking in a cry of pain when a thorn scratched deep into his side, keeping quiet until the barking of the dog was silenced by the roar of a twoleg.
Crowpaw caught his breath, the air around him was sickly sweet, and looking out the bush he could see the garden stretch before him. Suddenly, Crowpaw heard the shuffling of dirt behind him, followed by the heavy breathing of a frightened cat. He turned and found Stormfur shaking beside him.
"That was close." Stormfur gasped, "I thought the dog nearly had me for a second."
"Did you see where the others went?" Crowpaw asked, moving to the side slightly when he felt Stormfur's pelt begin to press against his.
"I thought my sister and Squirrelpaw would have been with you!" Stormfur's eyes widened with worry. "When the dog came, I lost sight of them!" His pelt began to shake again. "Straclan please, let them be alright!"
"They'll be fine." Crowpaw said quickly, Stormfur wouldn't help anyone if he was chattering away like a lost kit. "They can't have gone far."
Stormfur nodded, but he still trembled with concern. Crowpaw rolled his eyes; he understood it was Stormfur's sister, but surely he was more controlled as a warrior than this?
The apprentice sighed, looking out towards the garden again. This was bad, they were in the worst place inside the garden. Even if the dog was inside the twoleg nest, he could still smell its masters. He found the side of the nest and curved his ear to listen. Miraculously, he heard nothing in that direction. They could maybe get through their if they had the chance.
Crowpaw nudged Stormfur and motioned in the direction. "Once it becomes quieter around the garden, I think we run as fast as we can over there." Crowpaw explained, still watching the garden intently. "We can make it back to the hedge and find the others that way."
Stormfur still breathed apprehensively but was able to utter a small murmur of agreement.
"Okay, you give the word." Stormfur ushered, crouching next to Crowpaw.
Crowpaw looked over to the warrior strangely. A warrior was trusting an apprentice to give orders? This group was becoming more and more surprising every minute. He didn't even speak that much to Stormfur, but he still trusted Crowpaw's judgement.
Trust. It was becoming more bitter to think about.
Crowpaw tried to push the idea aside as he scanned the twoleg nest. Somewhere in the garden where they couldn't see, a twoleg kit was screeching against the grunts of an adult. It still wasn't clear yet.
"You're bleeding!" Stormfur exclaimed in a hushed voice. Crowpaw winced, looking down to where his side had been pricked by the thorn. When he moved to remove it, the thorn had left a nasty scratch along his side, as thin and long as a whisker, the wet blood was already beginning to soak in his fur.
Crowpaw groaned firmly, "It's nothing." He could deal with a little scratch later, "Just a small cut."
"It could still be infected." Stormfur remarked, "You should ask Feathertail about it, she's friends with Mothwing, the medicine cat apprentice, so she might know what to dress it with."
"I'll be fine." Crowpaw couldn't hide the irritation creeping into his voice. The last thing he needed were different clan cats coddling him like they were his clan's medicine cat. He didn't need to rely on them like that.
Stormfur frowned, "It's better to be safe than sorry. She wouldn't mind at all."
"I don't want her to!"
"Why? She's been the only one who's ever been nice to you from the start, you ungrateful fox-heart!" The twitch of a snarl was becoming evident in Stormfur's tone.
He was right. Feathertail had been nice to Crowpaw from the very beginning.
That was the problem. She made the voices start every time.
"I never asked her to." Crowpaw growled.
Now Stormfur was beginning to match the apprentice's irritation, his tail slamming crossly against the soil. "Why are you being so stubborn? If that gets any worse it could mean you won't be able to get to the Sun-Down place!" The Riverclan cat chided, "That affects all of us!"
"It'll take more than a cut to stop me." Crowpaw narrowed his eyes, "Besides, it shouldn't matter to you. You weren't chosen!"
Stormfur looked like he might have raked the cat's ears if they weren't forced to work together. "It affects my clan, frog-brain! I didn't need to be chosen to know that!"
Crowpaw scoffed, looking away to what he should have been focusing on, he tried to listen but Stormfur continued to rant.
"There's no shame in asking for help, you mange-pelt!" Stormfur grumbled, he sounded insulted for some reason. "Whether you like it or not, we're all a part of this journey, which means we all have to look out for each other! So why don't you just swallow your pride and let us see if we can help you?"
Crowpaw clenched his teeth at that word. "I don't need any help. If it gets bad I can take care of it on my own!" He had no knowledge of medicine in the slightest, but he would rather apply fox-dung than ask them for help. Stormfur may have been happy to surrender his pride and ask Crowpaw for orders, but Crowpaw wasn't like him. He never could be.
"You won't get far thinking like that, Crowpaw!"
"Will you be quiet? I'm trying to listen!" Crowpaw hissed scornfully. He expected Stormfur to ignore him, but the cat gave an ungracious sniff and seethed to himself. He was silent though thankfully. Crowpaw twitched his ear to listen again, quietly waiting as the twoleg kit's cried increased before a set of heavy footprints followed. The twoleg kit gave a brief cry of alarm, weeping as the footsteps of the adult twoleg dragged it away. There was the slamming of the nest's door. Crowpaw waited a good minute before daring to advance forward slightly, listening closer.
There was nothing. Just the quiet hum of the wind blowing through the garden.
Crowpaw tensed, it was now or never. "Okay, I don't hear anything."
Stormfur still looked like he was sulking, but he followed Crowpaw's lead, listening as well. The warrior nodded, satisfied, trusting.
Crowpaw placed every power into his legs, they needed to be as quick as they could. "You ready?" He asked without looking at Stormfur.
He felt Stormfur prepare to run as well, "Ready."
Immediately they shot of the bush, quickly making ground across the garden and towards the edge of the twoleg nest. Crowpaw had to muster every ounce of strength he had to ignore the throbbing pain in his side; the wound must have been deeper than he thought. But he could deal with it. It wouldn't be for long. Just over another side of the fence they could see the hedgerow in the distance. Relief washed over their hearts; they'd be out soon. They just had to make it past the next garden and then they'd make it to the hedge within seconds. At that point they could work on finding the others.
It was simple. Had it not been for the snarling kittypet that stalked around the corner of the twoleg nest. Blocking where they needed to go. Both the forest cats paused in place, the kittypet was huge and golden, it's growling head was two times the size of Crowpaw's!
Crowpaw and Stormfur both crouched down into fighting positions, hissing and lashing out at the kittypet with warning claws. Crowpaw held his nerve, it was just one, the two of them could handle it. Size didn't matter when it came to a warrior's strength.
Then another furious chatter came from behind them.
Another kittypet, bigger than the other was advancing behind them, as ready to fight as its friend was. Crowpaw and Stormfur both took a few steps back from the two, unknowingly conering themselves against the twoleg nest. The two kittypets began to advance as one, the two of them crafting their own wall of muscle and claws and teeth. But Crowpaw and Stormfur could surely fight them off, they would be able to win the fight against these two sacks of flesh.
Crowpaw prepared himself to attack, ready to rip every piece of fur from the kittypets bodies. He flattened his ears down to look threatening and lashed out with a paw. Before it could land however, he winced as his side flashed with pain. He hid his agony from the kittypets well, but it wouldn't stop the pain. Stormfur seemed to notice something was wrong, desperately scratching at the kittypets in an attempt to threaten them. It wasn't working well.
Crowpaw, despite his best efforts, began to panic. The tremoring agony at his side held him back severely. These kittypets may not have been warriors, but they could still inflict damage, and they could do even more if Crowpaw couldn't fight properly. He crouched down again despite the searing wound, hissing madly, it was all he could do for now. But he knew it wouldn't work for long.
In all his life, Crowpaw had never felt so helpless.
The voices screamed for him to fight, to protect his honour against these soft kittypets, to show Stormfur he didn't need him to protect himself, to prove that he didn't need anyone.
Crowpaw couldn't follow their instructions.
He prepared himself to fight though. Even in pain, even though he was injured, he had to fight. For the journey. He would probably come out with serious wounds, but it would be even worse than just waiting for the kittypets to attack. Him and Stormfur had to fight with all they could.
Then over the kittypets heads, a stream of fiery fur pounced, landing behind the two huge cats.
Crowpaw had to blink several times before he could register that Squirrelpaw was sizing up to two cats at least three times her size, looking more vicious than the two combined. Crowpaw's chest surged in horror; what was she thinking? She couldn't handle these two huge toms by herself!
"Stormfur, Crowpaw. Over here!" The two cats turned and saw Brambleclaw calling from the hedge, his eyes pressing them to run.
Time seemed to stop for Crowpaw. Squirrelpaw was drawing the two cats away from him and Stormfur. She was risking her own safety for them. Between the two kittypets, Crowpaw stared as Squirrelpaw advanced with claws and a look ready to kill. She didn't seem to care that it was a fight she looked to lose; it was clear she was ready for blood, be it theirs or hers. Briefly her gaze met Crowpaw's and he saw the determined flick of her head towards Brambleclaw. Run mouse-brain! Her gaze yowled.
Even when faced with two snarling kittypets, she cared about his safety more than her own.
Something stirred inside Crowpaw's mind.
The voices sensed it and rose up in a roar.
Yes run! Let her take the brunt of it! Better her than you! She wasn't even chosen! You're the one who matters in this journey, not her! She doesn't matter in-
'Shut up.' Crowpaw's mind demanded. For the first time ever, the voices obeyed.
Squirrelpaw was Thunderclan. Squirrelpaw had hated him at first sight. Squirrelpaw had been the cat that Crowpaw had been the most vicious to every step of the journey.
But Squirrelpaw had apologised when she thought she was in the wrong. Squirrelpaw had made an effort to get on with him despite his attempted coldness. Squirrelpaw was ready to put herself in danger so Crowpaw and Stormfur could escape unharmed.
Clan didn't matter on this journey. No one in the group had ever thought it had. This journey made laws that had guided them all sink into the darkness.
It was time for Crowpaw to follow the journey's rules.
He ignored Brambleclaw's continuous yelling for them to run, even when Feathertail had began to join in. Luckily it looked like Stormfur was going to ignore them too. Even Tawnypelt joined in, jumping down from a garden fence to stand by Squirrelpaw, bristling for a fight! The two toms got back into fighting stances, backing up Squirrelpaw as they advanced on the two kittypets from the other side. Squirrelpaw stared at them incredulously for a second, but the trace of a grin, ripe with mischief and bloodlust, captured her muzzle perfectly. They were possibly coming out scarred, but they were doing it together.
Crowpaw wasn't a coward. He was a warrior. And a warrior backed up his patrol in a fight.
The lashing looked certain to begin when suddenly the twoleg adult returned, screaming from her nest at the battle. The two kittypets succumbed to their master, fleeing with their tails between their legs. The forest cats took the opportunity to dart towards the hedge, slamming into Brambleclaw and Feathertail as they made refuge.
Crowpaw noticed when his side began to burn again, wincing as he now took the time to lick at the wound. A mixture of disappointment and relief coming over his whiskers.
He looked up when Brambleclaw began to scold Squirrelpaw again. Crowpaw glowered, had the stupid tom not seen how the apprentice had saved them?! He should have been praising her to no end right now!
To her credit, Squirrelpaw didn't look phased by Brambleclaw, shrugging him off ungraciously as she licked at an ear. Stormfur was the first to shut Brambleclaw up, praising the apprentice's bravery, Feathertail soon followed, and then Tawnypelt.
Every clan cat except her own had praised Squirrelpaw.
Crowpaw shut down the voices before they could ever start again.
This wasn't the forest. This wasn't Windclan. All these cats had was each other. And Crowpaw needed to trust them.
Slowly, it was becoming easier to do that.
Now, he certainly knew he could trust one cat.
"Thank you." Crowpaw said, his eyes focusing on Squirrelpaw. The Thunderclan apprentice paused as if she hadn't heard him. The other cats all looked at him as if it was the first time he had spoken at all. Crowpaw groaned with a flush, "What, she deserves it. It was brave." He admitted, looking away from the other cats. But in the corner of his eye, he found Squirrelpaw again.
The cat stared at him, her green eyes still processing his words. It was the first time Crowpaw had ever really praised her. Brambleclaw had the sense to look humiliated and hastily conceded to calling her action brave as well.
Squirrelpaw didn't bat an eye at her clanmate. Crowpaw's appreciation, his genuine thanks, somehow seemed to mean something, like it was her personal achievement that she could bring out anything other than coldness from the frosty cat.
He seemed to let his guard down for the first time.
Squirrelpaw had done that to him, and she was touched.
She couldn't let him know that.
"No problem!" Squirrelpaw puffed out her chest with a sense of obnoxious pride that made the others smile. "If anyone's going to give you the clawing you deserve, mouse-brain, it's going to be me. Not some soft kittypet."
Still the same pain she always was.
But it didn't irk Crowpaw's mind anymore. It almost made Crowpaw smile. And by knowing that she was clearly putting up a front, Crowpaw realised that he trusted this cat.
The little voices at the back of his mind stayed silent.
Good riddance.
The gasp of Feathertail broke the brief moment. "Oh my! Crowpaw, you're bleeding. Hold on, I think Mothwing told me how to treat this!"
Before Crowpaw could even say what had caused it, Feathertail began to fuss over him.
All while Feathertail dressed him with dock leaves and marigold petals, Crowpaw made sure the smirking face of Stormfur never opened his mouth.
…
I don't know why I keep making intended short chapters so long. This ship has possessed me like The Broken Code.
Anyway, hope you enjoy!