Bella POV

I woke at some point during the night to find myself in a tangle of limbs with my back against Jake in bed. So that had actually happened. We'd gone through with it.

Things were rocky at first, but it went better after Jake stopped and forced us to have an awkward but necessary conversation. I was strangely okay with everything that had happened after even though it didn't exactly go according to my original plan. I never meant to make him feel like I was disgusted by him or like being with him was some kind of chore. The truth was I'd always been attracted to Jacob, maybe not in the same way that I looked at Edward, but enough that I felt guilty acting on it. I realized now that none of that was his fault, and it wasn't fair of me to try to turn the whole thing into some kind of cold, mindless procedure to get over with. He was willing to give up his virginity for me, and he deserved better than that. The least I could do was push my guilt aside for long enough to keep it from turning into a traumatic experience for us both. And that's certainly where things were headed if I kept shutting him out.

I shifted under the weight of his arm, and two things hit me at once. First, I'd kicked every sheet and blanket to the floor, probably thanks to the human furnace sharing the bed with me, and second, I was still naked except for my bra. I was suddenly hyper-aware that my bare backside was pressed against Jacob. I could feel his hot skin against my back and knew that he was still naked, too. My movement caused him to stir, and he burrowed his face further into my hair in his sleep. I tried to gently lift his arm from my waist so I could crawl out and retrieve my underwear, but the motion just caused him to grip me tighter. I felt a hot pressure rise against the back of my left thigh, and the butterflies in my stomach figured out what was happening a moment before my brain did.

I squirmed again, and this time I heard a yawn. I turned my head back over my shoulder towards him, the rest of me still trapped in his arms. He lazily opened his eyes and looked at me, then grinned.

"You're up," he said.

"Um, so are you…" I hinted.

He didn't move an inch to release me. I shifted the slightest bit, and I knew he could feel me move against him.

"Oh, that…sorry." He moved his hips back a few inches and released the arm that had been draped over me to cover himself. I took the opportunity to roll onto my stomach to cover myself too until I could figure out how to get to a blanket or my clothes. "I guess we fell asleep," he added.

"It's okay," I reassured him. "Just...not exactly how I expected to wake up." I laughed.

"I'm glad you're amused." He grinned back at me. I caught him staring in the general direction of my exposed rear, and I suddenly remembered that he could probably see just fine in the dark. Of course. I crawled far enough to look over my side of the bed, but the blankets must have all been on his side.

"You know, I was thinking, it would be a shame if it didn't work and we had to go through planning this all out again in a few weeks," he said. "I think the responsible thing to do here is to give it our best shot this time."

"Jacob Black, are you trying to convince me to sleep with you again?"

"I mean really, given the circumstances, it would be irresponsible to pass up this perfect opportunity. We're here on a mission, and I intend to make good on my promise to you. Very good, if you'll let me," he teased.

I swung my leg to the side and kicked him playfully in the shin, careful to keep my stomach flat against the bed. "Who is this dog and where is my innocent little Jacob?"

"Says the woman that just deflowered me."

"You could've fooled me. Are you sure that was your first time?" I asked. I felt my cheeks redden as soon as the words came out. He'd somehow known exactly what to do.

"Ah, yeah. I guess the whole pack mind thing had to have at least a few perks eventually."

"Oh." Realization hit me. He must have seen dozens of awkward intimate details from his ex-pack members minds and learned from them. I was suddenly glad they would no longer be able to see his, then felt guilty for even thinking it.

"So…it was okay for you?" He asked. He sounded less cocky than before, insecure even, and I knew he had dropped the act and was really asking. Underneath the jokes and the show of confidence, this was still my Jacob, the same sweet guy that had thrown caution to the wind to help build motorcycles just to impress a girl.

"It was more than okay," I admitted. I wondered if he could detect my flushed cheeks in the dark. "I think that's enough talking for now."

He mimed zipping his lips and throwing away the key. He might have been flirting like the horny teenage boy that he had every right to be, but he had a point. I hoped this would work on the first try, but we'd have to wait a month to know for sure. Meanwhile, we were still here, and he was clearly ready to get back to work. I quit overthinking for once and went with it, telling myself that giving it one more shot could be the difference between success and failure.

I pointed my finger at him in the dark, knowing he'd see it just fine. He raised his eyebrows and pointed back at himself silently as if to say "Who, me?" I nodded yes and motioned with my finger to come over to me. His eyes went wide and I didn't have to ask him twice.

The car ride home was somehow way more relaxed than our drive to the cabin, and I was seriously relieved. We had officially survived one of the weirdest situations ever, and instead of things getting awkward afterwards, to me it just felt like a weight had been lifted.

"Is it weird that I don't feel weird?" Jake's voice broke my concentration from staring out of the car window and echoed my own thoughts back to me.

"I don't exactly think there's a handbook for what's normal to feel about all of this. But yeah, I know what you mean," I admitted. "I think going back and having other people know is going to be weirder than anything."

I knew that my family would be nothing but supportive about it, but just having them know that I slept with Jacob somehow felt like an invasion of privacy. I'd just have to get over it.

"Can I ask how much you're going to tell Edward about it?"

I didn't know the right answer to that question.

"I'll tell him anything he wants to know, but I'm not sure he'll ask. I think it would probably be easier on him if he doesn't."

"I'll try to keep my thoughts to myself around him," Jake agreed. Hearing about it from me was one thing, but having to watch an instant replay in Jacob's mind would be infinitely worse. I hoped he'd never have to, and I was glad that Edward would be spared from having to see my memories of it all.

I was relieved when I got back home later and Edward only asked if I was okay and if we were able to go through with it. I told him that everything went fine and with any luck, hopefully we'd have a positive result in a couple of weeks. All that was left to do once again was wait.

Rosalie and I didn't obsess about pregnancy tests this time. I was hopeful, but I didn't want to be overly confident and have my heart broken again. Jake had joked about being willing to try as many times as necessary if it didn't happen the first time, but I didn't think I could keep putting us all through this over and over again. We were lucky enough to make it through once.

I didn't take a single pregnancy test while we waited, but I secretly counted down the days to my expected period like it was a countdown to Christmas. On that day, Rose finally brought me a test.

I looked down at the box she placed in my hand. "I don't think I want to, Rose. Not yet."

"Okay, if you're sure. No news is good news, right?"

"I guess."

My period didn't come that day, or the next or the next. I knew it was a good sign, but it wasn't unheard of to be a day or two late. I wasn't ready to see the negative sign and be back at square one with no idea what to do next. And even though Carlisle had assured me that my body was perfectly healthy, part of me was irrationally worried that maybe I'd never be able to get pregnant. What if the problem wasn't Jake, but me? Could we really be sure that there hadn't been some kind of permanent supernatural damage to my body that was undetectable by Carlisle's tests?

At the one week mark, Edward confronted me while I was eating cereal at the kitchen counter.

"Good morning, Mrs. Cullen. How are you feeling today?" he asked.

I swallowed a mouthful of Lucky Charms. "Are you trying to ask me if I'm feeling pregnant?"

"Consider it an open-ended question, answerable in whatever way you feel." He looked guarded, like he wanted to say something but wasn't sure how.

"Rose talked to you, didn't she." He pulled up a stool next to me and didn't deny it.

"Bella, you should think about taking the test. Whatever it says, we'll deal with it together."

"I know." I sighed. I knew there was no use putting it off any longer. Either I was pregnant or I wasn't, and no amount of waiting would make a difference.

"I'm scared," I admitted.

"Of what?" he asked.

"Of whatever comes after the test."

"You've never let being scared stop you from doing anything before." He smiled at me. "You can do this."

"Are we still talking about the test?" I asked.

"What do you think?"

"Fine. Let's get this over with."

I put my bowl in the sink and marched upstairs to the bathroom where I had left the test Rose got for me. I thought about finding Alice and asking her if she'd seen anything, but I didn't need Alice's powers for this. I just needed to stop being a coward. If I could handle having sex with Jacob, I could certainly pee on a stick. I pulled open the drawer and picked up the box.

The three minutes we had to wait for the results felt like forever. I sat on the lid of the toilet while Edward stared down at the test on the counter, waiting. I couldn't look.

"It's driving you crazy that there isn't some freaky vampire way to just know, isn't it?" I asked him.

"Maybe." Another minute passed. "Bella, the results—"

I cut him off. "Is it showing?" He nodded. "I don't want to know. I've changed my mind. Just tell me in nine months."

Edward grinned. "Don't be silly. I think you'll want to see this."

He held the test out to me, the big blue plus sign unmistakable. It was positive.

"Oh my God!" I squealed. I jumped up and hugged him.

"Does that sound mean what I think it means?" Rose called from the hallway. Of course, I should have known she wouldn't be far. I was too excited to care.

She ran in and hugged me before I even let go of Edward, sandwiching me in the middle.

"Bella! Congratulations!" I heard Alice but couldn't actually see her over Edward and Rose's arms. "You guys aren't group hugging in here without me, are you?" I'd just have to assume Alice joined in. They were all being surprisingly gentle about it, at least, and I suddenly realized I'd have to be more careful about my own safety than ever before.

Jacob POV

I realized I had a lot more to worry about once I got back home to reality than just whether or not Bella was pregnant. I had no idea what the pack was going to do about me leaving or if I had been completely successful in guarding my thoughts from them when I broke the connection. Worst case scenario, they knew everything, and then they'd…what? Hunt me down? Go after Bella? Surely they wouldn't harm an innocent child, especially one of our own. I wasn't so confident about my own safety, but I'd manage.

Part of me considered taking off and not sticking around to find out. I'd already exhausted everything this area had ever had to offer me anyway. Bella, the pack. I would miss my dad, but Rebecca was close now. She'd help him if it came to that. I told myself this was all worst case scenario stuff and that I needed to forget about it for now. I was just brainstorming for plan B if shit hit the fan. But then what was plan A? Wait around and see what would happen? Join in some monthly pact with Bella if it hadn't worked the first time? Throw her a baby shower and play godfather to my own kid if it did? I wouldn't regret my decision to help Bella, but I had no idea how to navigate what would come next, regardless of the outcome. None of it quite felt real.

I finally decided the best thing I could do was try to lay low and at least stick around until we knew for sure if she was pregnant. I could stick it out for one month, and then…well, I'd figure it out when the time came. If Bella seemed okay and happy, maybe it would finally be time for me to move on, literally. For the first time since I'd changed, I was free to go anywhere. Maybe I'd take advantage of it.

I'd been back for a week when Seth showed up at my house unannounced. Dad answered the door, so I couldn't exactly tell him to get lost. As far as my dad knew, I was just upset and acting weird because Bella had finally made her decision to be turned. He'd figured out that much the day I phased and left behind Bella's letter in my room.

"Come on in, Seth. Wanna watch some TV?" my dad asked. "Jake and I were just about to make a couple of pizzas."

"I don't think he can stay, Dad. He looks busy," I hinted.

"That's okay, Billy. I just stopped by to talk with Jake for a second, but thanks for the offer."

"Garage." I told him under my breath.

Seth shrugged and led the way.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him once we were in the garage and out of earshot.

"Sam has a message for you." The kid looked nervous, and I couldn't help but feel bad for what I had done and the awkward position he was now in because of me. It reminded me of when my dad paid me to crash Bella's prom and give her that message about staying away from the Cullens. A lot of good that had done.

"Well?"

"The message is 'You're dead to us.' Direct quote, not my choice of words," he admitted.

Leave it to Sam to be dramatic.

"Meaning what, exactly? As in, like, I'm uninvited to all of your birthday parties, or I should watch my back while I sleep?" I tried to make a joke out of it to show him that I wasn't scared, but I was on edge waiting for his answer.

"Meaning you're out of the pack, Jake. We can't hang out or discuss pack stuff or anything. Nobody's coming after you, if that's what you're worried about. Sam doesn't want to make enemies, but he's made it clear that we're not on the same team anymore." Seth looked hurt. "Why'd you do it?"

I wished I could talk to him, but telling Seth anything would be telling Sam, too. He wouldn't be able to help it. I knew that better than anyone. I decided on giving him a limited bit of truth to take back.

"I just couldn't handle the commands anymore. I didn't want it to come to this."

"Then why let it?" he asked.

"This is just how it has to be, Seth. It's nothing personal."

"I get it. You can't talk to me, and I don't blame you. I just wish it didn't have to be like this," Seth confessed.

"Me too. Just…" I wanted to tell him to tell them all that I was sorry, that I missed them (well, some of them) already, and that I wished there was any other way to do what had to be done. But I could't, and I hoped he'd understand the words I didn't say. "Take care of yourself, okay?" I said instead.

"You too, Jake." He stepped forward and gave me an unexpected hug. "We're still brothers even if we're grounded," he said.

I pounded him on the back and wished like hell that it could be true.