Chapter 16: There and Back Again… and again… and again…
"Daddy, please?" Hela said in her most winning voice. It had always worked before.
"I said, no. You cannot keep them. They need to go back, they are not pets," Loki replied.
"But they are so cute and cuddly. I need something to keep me warm at night," Hela pleaded.
Loki simply lifted his eyebrows; not bothering to point out that the temperature in Hel was considerably warm.
"Fine!" Hela stomped her foot. "Next time you show up here, I'm keeping you! You will not get to go back like you have the last two times… or is it three now? You are worse than one of those silly cats you like."
"Leave my felines out of this…"
Loki disappeared before he could finish his sentence.
"Daddy?" Hela stared at the spot where Loki had been standing. "Where did he go?"
Thranduil shrugged. "I am sure we will find out, eventually. Either he will return, or …"
And Thranduil was gone.
Hela grinned, licking her lips as she looked at Legolas and Barton.
"Um, honey, I think your dad said you couldn't keep them," Stark interrupted her thoughts.
"Oh, you're still here. Well, daddy isn't, so he cannot stop…"
Hela was gone.
"Great… we're left here," Stark mumbled, then he realized he was back in the kitchens of Lutece. "How the hell…"
"Stark!" Fury barked the instant he appeared. "Where the hell have you been?"
"Would you believe Hel?" Stark quipped.
"No!" Fury bellowed.
"How about Mordor then?" Stark offered.
"Sir! You have returned!" Jarvis' voice sounded in Stark's ear.
"So it would seem," Stark replied. "Any sign of Miss Potts?"
"Indeed, she is in the sitting room. She appeared about twenty minutes ago."
"Excellent, I will be right there," Stark pointed one finger at the S.H.I.E.L.D. director. "Hold that thought." He activated his suit and flew off.
"Where the hell did he go now?" Fury shouted, staring at the door Stark and just flown out.
"Home?" Natasha suggested.
"He just left Hel," a voice behind spoke up. "So I doubt that he went there."
"Loki?" Fury whirled around, staring at the god of mischief. "Is this your doing?"
"I wish… unfortunately I have no control over what is happening." Loki grinned.
"Who the hell are you?" Fury demanded, noticing another figure had appeared.
"I am Thranduil. Are you humans always so rude?" the elven king asked.
"Ah, Thranduil. Glad you could join me. Shall we repair to somewhere a bit less… ah… noisy?" Loki asked.
"You two are going nowhere! Romanov, secure them!" Fury shouted.
"Uh, boss. I don't think that is a good idea," Natasha replied, shaking her head.
"I'm going to agree with the lady. I believe she is correct," Loki smiled. "Now, I do hate to disappoint you, but we really must leave. Dinner appears to not be on the menu tonight." He glanced around at the ruined kitchen. "Rather a mess. Thranduil, shall we go find something to eat, although it appears we have lost our entourage."
"Perhaps we can find another, those ladies were much nicer than this fellow. I wonder, is the limo still out there?" Thranduil carefully stepped around a pile of food on the floor.
"Only one way to find out," Loki followed him, pausing in the doorway to look back at Fury. "Ta-ta!"
"LOKI!"
~o~O~o~
Barton groaned. The ground was cold and hard. Pushing himself up, he looked around. He shook his head. They clearly were not in Hel anymore. This place was freezing. His eyes fell on the other archer… and some new arrivals!
"Legolas! Wake up!" Barton toed the blond elf.
Legolas groaned. "Where are we now?" He rose, his eyes widening as he noticed the advancing group. "What are those?"
"I was hoping you'd know," Barton replied.
"I have no memory of this place," Legolas said, his voice sounding rather wistful.
"I don't think those dudes are friendly," Barton commented. "Can you use that thing you're wearing, or is it just a chick magnet?"
"Chick magnet?" Legolas looked at Barton, confusion clearly evident on his face.
Barton rolled his eyes. "The bow and arrow… can you use it?"
"Why would I carry it if I could not use it?"
"Well, I sure hope you can, as these dudes definitely don't look friendly!"
The tall forms were closing in on the two archers. Barton and Legolas each took a stance with their backs to the other. Simultaneously, they drew an arrow and prepared their bows.
A roar erupted from their attackers, to be answered by a volley of arrows.
"Three!" Legolas' voice rang out.
"No, I got that one," Barton retorted. "We're even at two."
More arrows flew from their bows, felling several more of the attackers, but as they fell, others quickly replaced them.
"Seriously, what do these dudes want?" Barton grumbled. "Now would be a good time for that thing that is whisking us all over the universe to move us again.
A rainbow shimmer appeared, and seconds later Mjölnir came flying out of the effect striking the closest of the approaching enemy.
"Barton!" Thor's voice sounded joyfully as Mjölnir flew back into his hands.
"Thor?" Barton stared at the other Avenger.
"What are you doing on Jotunheim?" Thor asked, tossing Mjölnir back towards the group closing in.
"Is that what this freezer is called? And these are Yodelhummers?" Barton readied his bow, aiming at another enemy.
"No, Frost Giants."
"How did you find me?" Barton asked as he released an arrow at the nearest Frost Giant.
"I had just returned to Asgard, and Heimdall said there was something still going on with the convergence and you were sent here. I thought you might require some help. Who is your friend?" Thor nodded towards the elf.
"Ah, that's Legolas."
Thor frowned. "Legolas? Like from the movie we watched a few weeks ago?"
"Yeah, only the real deal." Barton loosed another arrow. "Six!" he crowed.
"You have fallen far behind me with your idle chatter, I am at twelve," Legolas bantered.
"Twelve? Damn!" Barton swore.
"Are you two having fun? I can come back later," Thor offered.
"Uh, no. But you can take us wherever you came from… if you can that is," Barton replied.
"But of course!" Thor grabbed an arm of each archer in one of his huge hands. Lifting Mjölnir to the sky, he shouted for Heimdall. Seconds later, they were surrounded by the Bifrost effect and were whisked away.
"Where are we now?" Legolas asked looking around the ornate chamber they had arrived in.
"Welcome to Asgard," Heimdall's booming voice greeted them. "I see you have found them, my lord."
"Indeed!" Thor grinned. He stared curiously at Legolas. "Who is he really?"
"I told you, he's the real deal… a real elf, from Middle Earth."
"Mirkwood actually," Legolas corrected him.
"But, that is just a tale, from a book," Thor stated.
"I am not from a book," Legolas countered.
"No, he showed up in the kitchens when Fury sent us in…"
"Quit pretending that this is an elf from Middle Earth. It is most likely one of those costume people you have on Earth," Thor replied.
Legolas stared at Thor like he had two heads. "Costume people? I fear you are wrong. I am Legolas of the Woodland Realm. My father is Thranduil, and I have recently aided in the defeat of Sauron and seen the destruction of the One Ring!"
It was now Thor's turn to stare at the elf. "You really believe that?"
"Thor, he's telling the truth. And Loki…"
"Loki is dead!" Thor interrupted his friend. "He has been dead for close to a year. Do not toy with me."
"Uh, buddy. I'm sorry to break this to you, but your brother is very much alive." Barton glared at Thor. "Don't go telling me I didn't see what I saw, and I saw your brother arguing with his daughter about trying to keep us."
"He is correct. It appears he and my father met up in Middle Earth. He was talking about something called the convergence," Legolas explained.
"But I saw him die…" Thor suddenly picked up on something Barton said. "His daughter? You've met Hela?"
"Yes, and she wanted to keep us, like we were kitties or something," Barton spat. "That woman is as crazy as her dad!"
"Loki is not crazy. He is my brother!" Thor roared. "And you say he is still alive?"
"He's right, Legolas is really from Middle Earth and Loki is alive," Sif's confirmed.
Thor whirled to see the Lady Sif standing in the entrance, a female elf standing at her side.