Chapter Nineteen

You don't wanna hurt me,

But see how deep the bullet lies.

Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.

There's a thunder in our hearts, baby.

So much hate for the ones we love?

Tell me, we both matter, don't we?

Running up That Hill – Placebo

-0-

"I was accepted!"

Dad had lost it after that. My normally reserved Dad had hollered very loudly before scooping me up and spinning me around the kitchen. He made so much noise that Bella finally emerged from her bedroom and came down the stairs to see what the commotion was about. Bella had congratulated me, but I could see it was only for Dad's benefit. She was of course wondering why I was even bothering to apply now considering what had happened this morning, but in a way, I think she saw this for what it was. It was me deciding that my future was mine and I wasn't going to be forced into becoming a monster.

She hadn't stuck around; she'd congratulated me and skulked up to her bedroom whilst Dad and I celebrated and called my Mom. Part of me thought I should feel hurt, but I didn't, I felt nothing. I wasn't mad or upset, I wasn't even annoyed. Bella didn't get it, she didn't understand the desire to live your life obviously, considering she was so willing to throw hers away.

Not only had I made it into my second-choice college, but they had offered me a full scholarship. I had a full ride and to me if that wasn't a sign that my future was still within reach then I don't know what was. Mom had been ecstatic and screamed so loud Dad had dropped the phone.

My next phone call that night had been to Jacob and he'd been happy for me. Like me, he was choosing to see this as a sign and although I knew the distance for those four years would be hard, I knew we could do it. We just had to make it through the next few months, and I had no doubt we could face whatever else life threw at us, just as long as we were in it together.

I was still of course still awaiting decisions from my other colleges but right now I couldn't see how I could turn this school down. Not only did it have an excellent programme, an incredible location, and great facilities but they'd offered me a full ride, a full scholarship.

-0-

"I got into Cornell." Jessica announced the following Monday as we all met in the car park. A chorus of congratulations sounded around Tyler's truck and we all took turns to give Jessica a hug. Cornell had been her first choice and I couldn't have been happier for her. Angela was headed abroad with Ben to do some travelling for a year before they both went to college as well which sounded equally exciting.

Life was happening all around us; the future was looking bright for everyone and it made me feel all the more determined to grab tight hold of mine and refuse to let go. I was going to fight for the chance to live my life, to have the chance to do anything and everything with it. It was just within reach, I could feel it, we just had to make it over this hurdle.

So, when Sam had tasked me with passing a letter over to the Cullen's requesting a meeting, I'd been only too happy. Jacob on the other hand hadn't been too happy but even he couldn't argue with Sam, plus we both knew there was little the Cullen's could say or do at school, not with everything being so public. I had promised though to message him the second the note was passed over, just so he'd stop worrying.

I slowly approached the Cullen's, wishing right now I were anywhere else but considering what was happening and how much the pack were doing for me, I could hand over a measly letter and hopefully have a reply by the end of the day. Luckily for me, with it being school hours, the only Cullen's here were Edward, Alice, and Jasper. My sister was here too but I paid her as little mind as I could. All of this, everything happening now was because of her and I found it difficult to rectify that inside of my head.

They'd sensed my approach before I'd even broken away from my group, but I kept my head high and my steps steady. Alice was the first to greet me with a cheerful wave, clearly not grasping the kind of situation we were in, either that or she didn't seem to see an issue with any of this. I saw Bella shift closer to Edward and I had to fight back the very unladylike urge to roll my eyes again.

I came to a stop in front of Jasper, making the decision that I'd have less of an issue talking to him. I got the feeling despite his ability to screw with emotions, that Jasper didn't play games. He was more likely to honour any request made as opposed to trying to manipulate the situation to his liking like some of the others.

"A letter from Sam Uley, the pack Alpha, requesting a meeting with your Coven." I explained, surprised at how steady my voice remained. I could feel Bella's eyes boring into the side of my head, but I ignored her, keeping my focus instead on Jasper as I held out the white envelope. "He's asked for a direct communication, so if you could get this to Carlisle as soon as possible and hopefully get something back to me by the end of the day so I can pass it on…it'd be appreciated."

I pressed my lips shut, feeling like I was somewhat rambling. Jasper to his credit listened patiently, taking the letter from my outstretched hand before pocketing it.

"I'll see that it gets to Carlisle and I'm sure by the end of the school day I'll have something to pass on back to you." He assured me and I felt my shoulders loosen in relief. Nodding my head, I offered him a small smile of thanks before stepping away from the group, ignoring Bella's quiet call of my name. I didn't look back, I refused to. My part was done now, at least until the end of the day.

Once safely inside the school and beside my locker, I pulled out my phone to send a quick message to Jacob, knowing the huge dork would more than likely be glued to his phone until he heard back off me.

[05.05.06] Grace Swan (7:57am) – Hey babe, I passed the letter to Jasper, he promised we'd have something by the end of the day. So, stop staring at the phone and get some sleep!

[05.05.06] Jacob Black (7:57am) – Are you okay?

[05.05.06] Grace Swan (7:57am) – Babe I'm fine. Stop worrying. Still picking me up?

[05.05.06] Jacob Black (7:58am) – Count on it. I'll let Sam know, we'll have somethin' today. I can't wait to see you

[05.05.06] Jacob Black (7:58am) – I love you baby x

I leaned back against my locker, staring down at my phone. I felt a warmth erupt inside of my entire body; it was almost like I could feel Jacob's love for me thrumming through the connection that we shared. Smiling softly, I bit down on my lip before typing out a reply.

[05.05.06] Grace Swan (7:59am) – I love you too babe and I can't wait to see you either. Now get some rest xx

The bell sounded signalling the time for class and I sighed sadly. Any reply Jacob would send would have to wait as I pocketed my phone and headed off to my AP Math class, eager to get the day done with so I could see Jacob.

-0-

"Have you settled on what you're going to major in?"

Jessica smiled brightly, nodding her head in answer to my question. "Political Science. It was a toss up between that and History but Political Science sounds so interesting." She explained excitedly.

Jessica had plans to go onto Law School from college. She had the next 10 years of her life planned out, right down to when she'd have time to meet her 'future husband'. Both Angela and I had explained it wasn't something she could plan but then it was Jessica, if there was anyone who could plan out how these big moments would play out in her life, it was Jess.

"Yeah definitely, you're going to be amazing Jess."

Jess's smile widened and she closed her college handbook. Clasping her hands together she focused on me. "What about you?" she asked, and I laughed lightly, shrugging my shoulders before answering.

"Well, yeah I'm thinking of studying…"

"Grace."

My conversation with Jess ended abruptly as Edward appeared at our table in the library. I tried not to allow his sudden appearance to upset me outwardly, the last I wanted to do was alert Jess that there was something wrong. "What is it?" I asked, not looking up at him.

"I was hoping we could talk, if that's alright by you."

I closed my eyes before glancing at Jess. "Jess do you mind giving us a minute?" I asked my friend, knowing I'd have to explain myself later. Despite what people thought, Jess wasn't stupid, she knew something was up but to her credit nodded her head.

"I have to go grab some more notes from my locker, I'll be back." She assured me, shooting a look at Edward before she left.

I wanted nothing more than to go with her, but I stayed in place and waited for Edward to sit in the newly vacant seat. I took a breath to calm my nerves, to remain calm so as not to alert Jacob that something was wrong. He'd already sense something, so if I stayed calm, hopefully he wouldn't worry.

"I appreciate you allowing me to…"

"Is this about the letter? Has Carlisle sent something back?" I asked, interrupting him, already wanting this conversation to be over. Edward slowly shook his head and I sighed softly, "So what is it you want Edward, there's nothing else for us to be talking about."

"But I think there is." He replied and I frowned, "I need you to fix things with Bella, she…"

"Don't!" I cut him off sharply, "Don't you dare tell me what I need to do when it comes to my sister, you have no right." I clenched my fists, trying to stay calm but already feeling the fire burning in the pit of my stomach. Edward didn't seem phased by my words, instead he remained patient and calm, which made me wish I could hit him.

"I didn't mean to, I'm sorry. It's difficult for me to see her hurting the way she is." He said and I frowned, surprised by his statement. Bella was hurting. Since when? "I know I have no right and I know you have every right to be angry, to be hurt but no matter what happens Bella needs you…"

"And I need her, but she has pushed me away for months, put my life in danger more than once because all she can see, all she can feel or think about, even when you're not here is you. It's obsessive and it's dangerous." I told him and to his credit, Edward listened and nodded his head taking in what I was saying to him. "And she can't miss me or want to make amends that much if it's you sitting here talking to me and not her."

"Bella doesn't know I'm here…"

That made me stop. Edward had sought me out on his own and as much as I didn't want to be talking to him, I found myself unable to end the conversation and leave. Part of me knew that we needed this, I held him responsible for the possible destruction of my family and whilst I knew he wasn't fully responsible, I couldn't help but view him as the big bad in my story.

"Do you know how hard it is, to watch your other half, your best friend in the entire world become someone you don't even recognise or even like anymore?" I asked him, realising that I needed him to understand. "I love her, I will never not love her with every cell in my body, but how she's treated me, treated Dad and Jacob, who she's become since meeting you, part of me hates her."

"No matter what happens Grace, you need to fix this, both of you because she loves you just as much as I know you love her…that anger you feel, that hatred it should be aimed at me. I'm the villain in this story. I should've stayed away, that first time I left I knew I should've stayed away but I couldn't, I came back and allowed myself to become part of her life, a part of yours. This is my fault, and your hatred needs to be aimed at me not her…"

I understood what he was saying, I did and right now I was appreciating this conversation. Granted it was the last place I wanted to be, but we needed this honesty. It didn't change how I felt about him but the last thing I wanted was to leave things unsaid, so maybe he was right, maybe Bella and I did need to talk. I mean if he and I could do it, then maybe Bella and I could sit down and have a calm, open conversation too.

"Edward, I wish I could hate you, I wish I could put all of this on you I really do but it's not in me to do that, because despite how I feel about you, I know how much you love her and since we're being honest here, I can only feel sorry for you." I admitted and I know that caught his attention.

"Why?" he asked quietly, his gaze remaining steady on me. Part of me didn't want to continue but this conversation was about honesty after all.

"I feel sorry for you because I know Bella in a way you never will, I've spent my entire life connected to her on a level no one can ever understand, so I know that she may not see it now but there is going to come a time in the future, when I'm gone, when everybody that she has ever known or loved is going to be gone…" I paused to take a small breath, "…and she is going to hate herself for the choices she made. It will finally hit her that she made the biggest mistake of her life, becoming a vampire."

There was silence as the heavy impact of what I had said, settled over us. I knew I was right; my sister couldn't see it now, probably wouldn't for a long time, but she was going to regret choosing a life as a vampire over a life with her family. I knew it.

"I know you're right." Edward said quietly, his amber eyes meeting mine once again. There was a pain there that left me momentarily stunned. "I know she will, I've known it from the second she asked me to turn her. I don't want to do it Grace, I don't want her to become a monster like me, I don't want her to lose you, her family, but no matter what I say or what I have done to try and stop it nothing has worked. The truth is I can't live without her and she won't allow herself to imagine our live together any other way. Now, the choice is out of my hands. The Volturi will kill all of us, they will level this whole town in order to make sure the secret stays hidden."

"I'm not becoming like you Edward, I'll die first." I told him, knowing what he was saying to me without him really saying it. "I can't save Bella, no one can if she doesn't want to be saved. I have to accept that and so do you, but I am staying human and there is going to be a fight. The only way we all survive is by doing this together. At this meeting everything needs to be out on the table, no secrets. You owe it to me, to do this Edward. You're taking half of me away; you're taking my sister…you owe me, and you owe my family."

"I can't save Bella, but I promise you I will spend the rest of my life loving her and protecting her. I will do this for you, for her because I know, as much as she wants you with her forever, she understands that you can't be. So, I will fight, I will stand with you and the wolves against the Volturi to keep you alive. So, you can live a life she won't."

I felt tears spill over onto my cheek as I reached out and took Edward's hand, offering him a quiet thank you. His skin was cold, marble like but he squeezed my hand gently, nodding his head as he stood from his chair.

"I will call Carlisle; you will have a letter back by the end of the day I promise."

"Thank you."

I watched him leave, his shoulders slumped forward slightly in defeat, in sorrow and I sighed softly. I know that our conversation had taken a turn he hadn't expected when he sat down but I knew that he knew, we'd needed to talk it out and it felt good. I couldn't forgive him, I never would but I didn't hate him, I hated this situation. Edward and I would never be friends and I knew we probably would never talk again, like we just had but I didn't care. I had said what I needed to say and so had he and I now knew that the wolves and the vampires had to fight on the same side.

I knew the wolves would hate that, but I knew Sam would understand it was the only way, the only chance we all had at making it out alive.

By doing it together.

-0-

The Cullen's were true to their word and by the end of the day I had a letter for Sam. Jasper had met me at the top of the steps and handed it over without saying a word, only a slight nod of acknowledgment

The conversation with Edward was still weighing heavily on my mind. As much as I hated to admit that he was right, I had to. I knew I had to talk to Bella, I couldn't keep waiting for her to make the first move. Time wasn't on our side, not anymore, even if we couldn't get back what we'd lost, we had to try and make some sort of peace.

As I stepped into the steadily emptying car parking lot however the only thought on my mind became Jacob. As my eyes landed on him, stood leaning against his motorbike with his arms crossed over his chest.

I smiled as his gaze seemed to easily find mine from across the parking lot. For just a moment I paused, I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was that was different about my boyfriend, until I realised, he was wearing full jeans and a black t-shirt that seemed to cling to every muscle.

"Damn girl, does he have any brothers?"

I rolled my eyes at Jess as she appeared at my side, unable to suppress the smile on my face as I looked at her. "He has six actually." I told her, laughing lightly as Jess fanned her face with her hand and shook her head.

"Well don't forget to mention your newly single friend to one of those brothers." She told me, nudging me playfully before turning and heading towards her car. Shaking my head I laughed again before turning towards my boyfriend who was, as of now smiling. No doubt he'd heard whatever Jess had said, damn wolf hearing.

Shouldering my bag, I hurried down the steps at the front of the school, before running towards where my boyfriend stood. Jacob's arms opened as I quickly approached and I fell into them without any pause, burying my face into his shoulder. Jacob's strong embrace wrapped around me tightly, lifting me off the floor effortlessly.

"Hey to you to baby." He murmured against my shoulder. I all but sunk against him, the feel of him wrapped around feeling instantly like home.

"I missed you." I admitted as we parted slightly, Jacob's strong hands were now holding onto my waist, keeping me close.

"Mhmm, I missed you too." He whispered, pressing a burning kiss to my forehead, before pressing his lips to mine. That familiar purr thrummed to life inside of me as it did anytime Jacob kissed me and as much as I wanted to continue, hearing the first wolf whistle made me pull back.

Shooting a dark look to my idiot classmates as they passed, I sighed softly and looked back at Jacob and smiled. "How was your day?" I asked, playing with a tuft of hair at the base of his head.

"Just got a hell of a lot better." Jacob said playfully. I laughed lightly and nodded my head.

"Mine too." I replied, pressing another kiss to his lips before pulling back enough to reach into my pocket. "But before I forget Jasper gave me this." I handed over the white envelope to Jacob and he took it, turning it over in his hands for a moment before slipping it into the back pocket of his jeans.

"How long do I have you before Sam needs you back?" I asked him, stopping any of the questions I knew were coming about my interactions with the Cullen's. Jacob sighed, letting his head drop forward before he answered.

"About as long as it'll take me to drive you home." He replied and I frowned sadly, my fingers lightly tracing along his jaw, forcing his head up.

"Well, might be an idea to take the scenic route home." I suggested, watching as his expression turned into something more mischievous, it made me smile as he pressed another kiss to my lips before turning quickly and swinging his leg over the bike.

After putting on the helmet he handed me and securing my bag over my shoulders, I climbed onto the back of the bike, wrapping my arms around his front, and pressing myself against his back. "Better hold on baby." He warned me, before starting the engine and taking off.

-0-

Jacob took my suggestion to take the scenic route seriously and it took us another twenty minutes on top of the usual time it took to get home. Even I had to admit there was something exhilarating about being on the back of the motorbike. Perhaps I wasn't as scared because my werewolf boyfriend was the one in control.

I trusted him more than anyone else in the world, I knew I was safe.

"A pack bonfire what's that like?" I asked Jacob as we stood on the front porch of my house. Jacob laughed and shook his head, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me close.

"Loud." He said, making me laugh. "Usually a lot of food, Dad will share some tribal stories…"

"Sounds great, count me in." I told him excitedly. Already planning on calling Emily to see what I could bring. I wanted to go with Jacob, I wanted to see what the letter said but I had already promised Dad I'd be straight home from school and Jacob was due out on patrol. So, this would be the last I'd see him for a couple of days, which made the idea of the bonfire at the weekend sounded all the more exciting.

"You'll call me later?" I asked, and Jacob nodded, his fingers edging beneath my shirt, before his hands curled around my waist. After a long moment, I kissed Jacob's chest through his shirt before sighing softly. "Good because I have some stuff to talk with you about."

"What is it, is there something wrong?

"No, I mean there's a lot wrong right now but um, I had a bit of a talk with Edward today. It was a good talk. I'll tell you more about it later." I assured him, smiling softly. The last thing I needed was for him to worry.

Leaning up on my tiptoes I pressed my lips to his. Jacob's hands instantly tightened around my waist as he held me closer. His touch left a trail of blazing heat in its wake. What had started out as a gentle, goodbye kiss became demanding; I wasn't sure which of us had asked for more, but more was taken. I yielded to his touch and he yielded to my mouth. I could tell from the way his body moved against mine that my actions were lighting a fire inside of him and the thought was thrilling.

As his hands roamed, brushing across new terrain, with strong determined fingers, it felt like he was marking me as his own. I pressed my lips to his with an increased urgency as my fingers tangled in his hair. Jacob opened up to me as I made my own claim on him. I leaned in closer to him, further into his hands and I never wanted to break away, but as the annoying need to breathe became more apparent, I reluctantly broke away.

"You're making it difficult to leave." Jacob said with a small smile. I scrunched up my face trying to play off that that hadn't been my plan and his smile only widened. "And that isn't helping." He joked, his finger tapping my nose. He'd always said he loved how I scrunched my nose up, I never understood it.

"Fine. Promise you'll call me later?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. Jacob nodded his head, kissing the tip of my nose.

"I'll call you later baby." He promised, lingering for a moment longer before we reluctantly began to part. Taking my hands in his Jacob pressed a kiss to my knuckles before stepping back off the porch, offering me one more bright smile before he made his way to his bike.

I lingered on the porch until the bike disappeared down the road, an instant chill settling over my body with him gone. Letting the tips of my fingers touch my lips I smiled softly, already counting down the seconds until I could find myself in his arms again. Glancing once more at the woods, I stepped back towards my house and headed inside.

Bella wasn't home yet. I wanted to talk to her, I had no idea what I wanted to say but I knew we needed to talk. Until then there was one other person I needed to talk to. Reaching for the phone I quickly dialled in a number before lifting the receiver to my ear. As a familiar voice answered I smiled and sat myself down at the kitchen table.

"Emily! Jake told me about the bonfire this weekend, need me to bring anything?"

-0-

So here we have Chapter Nineteen and I hope you guyaz54rs enjoyed it!

This chapter is where we officially start to deviate away from Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. I took a lot of creative licence from here on out, so I hope you guys are okay with that and you still enjoy the story.

When it comes to her gut feeling around vampires the way it plays out in my head is that no, she doesn't have a gift like Bella. Grace's gut feeling comes from her twin bond with Bella and has a lot to do with the imprint. Even before Jacob imprinted on her Grace had an accurate gut feeling about vampires being close. I see this as being because her twin bond with Bella was so strong, they had that twin connection, the ability to sense things like their twin being in danger, hurt, upset etc. So, whenever Edward was creeping into Bella's bedroom, Bella was in danger, even if she never saw it that way, that's how Grace felt it, even though she never knew that's what it was. When Jacob imprinted, that ability only grew stronger, only this time it wasn't strictly tied to Bella. Grace ability or accurate gut feeling grew stronger because that's how imprintee's are protected. They are connected to their imprints in a way that whenever they're in danger, the wolves know, they sense it. It's the same way the imprintee's have a sense when their wolf is hurt…they're connected on a level that even Bella and Edward will never understand.

Did that make sense?

Thank you to all new readers, we're happy to have you as part of our little family here – ani1202, liliums, Lili Tommo, aiinuitachi, alexamoreno96, jadasimone16, Royal Dragon-Slayer, emedemar, Magicanna23, SparkBomb'sFaith, NocturnalNessa, skrillexia007, Seiraaa, illowKP, IcePhoenix12360, Kgloribel1993, xoxonana, NaRuKo-InuTaiSHo-XD, Unburntkhalessi, gianna722, Miss Cassandra, oomphSiriusBlack, kksambo, Airi Chou, Melissadml

Kagz419 – Thanks for the review lovely! The Pack protect their own and Grace is one of their own now, so it was never a question for them about protecting her and facing the vampires head on. It's not just for Grace though, more vampires on their turf means more of their people are in danger and more boys will turn, which isn't what the pack want. Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Twin68 – Thanks for the fab review love! I know my updates aren't regular right now but I'm trying my hardest to get these chapters edited and out to you guys. The Pack are awesome like that and they're always going to rally for one of their own and I think Grace is a little overwhelmed by that. The meeting was the first time she's met them and they're ready to fight for her and Jacob. I think Leah gets a bad rep, she has every right to be angry and bitter and I think we need to remember that it's still only recently her Dad died to. She's not a hateful person, she's just a person who is really, really hurt and I think we'll get to see a different side to her coming up. Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

NaRuKo-InuTaiSHo-XD – Thanks for the review love and so happy to hear you enjoyed this particular chapter. Things are going to start to speed up so I hope you're ready for that! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Janecsky – Thanks for the review lovely! I wrote a more detailed response to your assumption further up so did that answer your question? She is attuned to vampires but it's strictly through her twin connection with Bella and sensing the danger her sister is in and also the imprint. Did the explanation at the top clear it up a little for you? I know I didn't post an update quickly, but with my shoulder the way it is I got it out as soon as I could, so I hope you still enjoyed it! Can't wait to hear from you again!

Kksambo – Thanks for the review lovely! I'm so happy to hear how much you love the idea, I've always wanted to delve deeper into the imprinting part of it. SMeyer made a point of making it such an important part of the wolves and then failed to do anything really interesting with it which sucked so, I took some creative license. The wolves were my favourite part of the books if I'm honest, I would have happily read four more Twilight books centred solely on them, as it is Meyer never wanted to go there and don't even get me started on what she did to poor Jake's character in Eclipse. The pack have definitely embraced Grace as one of their own and she even earns her own nickname later on curtesy of Embry, so can't wait for you all to see that. Bella does suck and I promise you, her and Grace will have a one-on-one scene soon, where hopefully Bella tries to make amends! Anyway, can't wait to hear what you thought on this chapter!