Ch 15 | The Lady

She slammed the door behind her and gave it her worst stare, hoping it could reach Tobirama's stupid prehistoric head.

Not for too long though.

The big window of her room was open. The cold ocean breeze hit her back and she turned to close it, cold and anger urged her, she mauled the poor old wood frame.

Not the cold air nor intruders were welcome normally in her room, even less now when she was so pissed.

The maid she identified as her sister's friend was in her room. She pretended to be busy cleaning the room, but she knew better. She was spying on her, listening.

"What are you doing here?"– she was too obfuscated, she sounded harsh even to her own ears.

"I-I'm sorry, I was adjusting your clothes to make some place for your lord husband, your mother ordered– "

"Leave." – she interrupted the servant, her stupid mumbling was giving her a headache.

"Uh? Umm, but I haven't finished and your mother…–"

"Are you deaf?" – stupid snake in the grass, did she think she was dumb enough to not see through her?

"I'm sorry, I'll note your mother of your displeasure"–

"Leave! "–

What the hell happened with her life. She was supposed to be a grown woman, plotting in the safe shadow of Kokuyo she carefully built. Instead, she was still fighting to grasp the reins of her own life, still in her parents' house.

She wanted to pet Shibomashira.

Lady Kato's office

"She threw me out, my lady. She didn't buy my excuse and saw through my intentions immediately, I'm sorry."

"Don't worry my dear, I kind of hoped for this outcome"

"You knew?"

"I know my daughter, or so I like to think. I wanted to know how bad the situation was."

"It's really bad, she doesn't even let him come near."

Sigh– "It's my fault. I let her father deal with her absurd demands as a child alone. Now she doesn't know how to be a woman."

"Don't be so hard on yourself my lady. Yukiji (her sister) doesn't have these troubles."

"Everyone has troubles. We mothers must secure we give our children tools to deal with them properly when they leave our roof. I clearly failed to give her what she needs."

"What should I do now, my lady?"

"Nothing. The rest is mine to do. They won't leave this home until they share the room willingly, at least."

Makoto`s bathroom

Since he was already in the bathroom he decided to take the bath anyway. She didn't say he couldn't after all.

He didn't have too much planned out when he decided he was going to chase her. He thought he could think of something on the road, but even now when he reached his destination and talked –if you can say their past interaction was "talking"– he didn't really know what to say in order to not make this worse.

Every time he opened his mouth he screwed it up. It was becoming frustrating. He wasn't a social hummingbird but was good at negotiating.

Makoto gave him no choice. It was like he had to be someone else so she could give in. Of course, he wasn't going to change, but the idea brought back the memory of the young guard –her ex-lover– and their distasteful conversation.

On top of that, he was in her territory now, a disadvantage. He had to find allies or at least information in order to make her come back willingly to the valley or this would be the first time he would fail in any negotiation. He wasn't someone who failed.

He decided to pay a visit to Lord Kato. He was the main reason he was buried neck deep in this trouble after all.

He took his time in the bathroom. It was built to work also as a sauna. In the steam lingered her shampoo odor, but he already fought with her because of her smell and he wasn't going to visit her father after touching himself shamelessly.

He finished quickly and went towards his assigned room to find a set of clothes prepared for him.

Lady Kato assumed well about his package. He didn't bring any change of clothes since he hoped this to be quick. Once again he was wrong regarding this woman.

The sleeves were a little larger than needed since they were sewed lower into the torso, designed for someone of sturdier build, probably borrowed from Lord Kato. Not that he was complaining.

He asked a maid where to find him. As Lord of the house, it wasn't a problem to locate him. He heard what he thought could be his voice when he was in the corridor near the door. He was talking to a maid.

"You must be new, I haven't seen you around here before."

"Ha! The others... they told you, didn't they? You know exactly how to make my tea."

"You aren't a talker, hmm?

"Oh no, are you crying dear? This old man said something wrong?"

Tobirama, half curious half alarmed by this monologue, inclined his head in order to see who was the maid.

To his surprise, it was Makoto kneeling beside her father, arranging the tea set to retrieve it. It clenched his heart, she came here seeking refuge but her father didn't remember her.

Makoto took away her father's hands and tucked them lovingly in his lap –" It's nothing. I'm happy to serve."– she said with a small voice. She kissed his forehead and turned, picking the set hastily, trying to hide the rest of the incoming tears.

When she turned to leave she walked a couple steps looking at the floor and almost collided with him if not for him stopping her at arm's-length.

She didn't expect someone there and lifted her gaze with surprise, which changed immediately to apprehension when she realized it was him.

He pities her, and the feeling was reflected on his face, presumably, since she changed her expression to anger, fat tears leaving her big turquoise eyes.

"Who are you, young man? Is he annoying you, dear?"

"N-no my Lord."– she made a small reverence and freed herself. She was normally quiet when walking on the wood floor but now she fled walking soundly, if not almost running.

He knew she didn't want his pity, but he was genuinely worried about her. This was the second time he saw her crying in a short period of time, she didn't look like someone who cried a lot. He decided to talk with Lord Kato first.

"My Lord, I'm Tobirama, the younger of the Senju. Do you remember me?"

Lord Kato looked at him carefully for long seconds. He looked like he was making a great effort trying to remember him.

"Ah! Of course, I remember. You were always in the first row on the battlefield! Say, how's Butsuma?"

He said that with the biggest smile on his face, presumably, he was happy for being able to remember his father's name… though he died 14 years ago. Tobirama didn't know what to say. Was Lord Kato's memory loss recent? Could he just remember events from remote past? Maybe that's why he didn't remember his own family sometimes… 14 years or more is a long time. He followed his game, he concluded it was the less problematic choice.

"He's fine, my Lord. Have seen better days though, last battle was intense."

"Haha! Butsuma is a hard nut to crack, but what are you doing here my boy? Did he send you to be a squire here?"

Squire? He thought he was still a young boy? Couldn't he see he was a grown adult? So… his memory wasn't the only thing affected by his illness.

"I'm at your disposal, my Lord."– he didn't want to talk more than he should.

"You should go with Kuren. He can show you around. He's my first squire –he clarified– he's the one who is always with my first daughter. I trust you will be good friends, haha!"

He made a bow and went out of the room as quick as he could. He could maintain the poker-face only so much. If Lord Kato only knew the outcome of his decisions…

Kuren then...It seemed Lord Kato could just remember events prior Makoto's intervention in the war. He probably knew she didn't want marriage when he sent her to the Valley, maybe the outcome caused him pain too.

It was difficult to know, he didn't know anything about Makoto. One could only assume what kind of a relationship she had with her father. It's obvious they shared great confidence and love since he gave her enough freedom to manage a dubious intel net and many other liberties no woman has ever had till now.

He had to know more if he wanted to understand that woman.

" There you are! Did you see a ghost? You are paler than usual, my boy?"– Lady Kato found him in the middle of the corridor, blank stare while he digested his encounter with Lord Kato.

"I`m sorry, I just..."– he didn't know how to tell her about his conversation with the Lord without saying something that could be interpreted as offensive.

"Ah, you have talked with my husband already. Did he remember you?"

"Yes, but he sends regards to my father, he thinks he's alive."

"Sometimes he comes back to the present though. Those days are the worst. He has fewer symptoms when he thinks he's in the past."

"Symptoms? Like he still thinks I'm a child?"

"Yes. Dementia diminishes his tremors and body pain, or at least he forgets."

"I'm sorry I didn't know–"

"You don't have to apologize for that, my dear. Nothing about his condition is your fault."– she interrupted him.

Tobirama caught the subtlety under her words. He was to blame in other areas and she knew. He stared at her calculating her opinion regarding that matter.

"Don't be afraid, we can fix it. I will help you, but we shall talk first."

He just nodded. For now, Lady Kato was his only source and he was somehow relieved she was on his side, apparently.

lady Kato's office (again)

She led him towards her office and ordered not to be bothered until she indicated so, then made herself comfortable and offered him a seat. He took it reluctantly.

"You don't have to fear second intentions here Tobirama-dono. I love my child, but I guess you have hurt each other, it couldn't be unidirectional... I had also experienced her stubbornness."

Tobirama let his guard drop a little. He knew he would have to talk in order to gain Lady Kato's aid. He hoped she would be content with only a few words. Also, she called him by his name. Maybe she noticed his discomfort when she asked him to call her mother. She stared at him and made a motion for him to speak.

"I wasn't expecting the marriage to be real."

"At first, it seems, but now you are here trying to get her back instead of a divorce. What changed?"

"My brother–"

"You must pardon me but you don't have the fame of listening to your brother Tobirama-dono. More like you make most of the decisions. I am wrong?"– she interrupted him again.

Lady Kato saw directly through him. Why did she want to talk then? If she assumed what happened...

"A divorce would shrink Konoha's see our steadiness as a projection for the future of the village."

"Hmm... that's a very good answer, but my servant saw you interrupt Makoto's bath. Is that part of your steadiness?

Tobirama's ears and neck went noticeably red with the comment. He diverted his eyes from her knowing gaze. She wanted him to admit his hormone crush?

"My dear, you are a young man. I didn't expect something different. Men can be a little hard on the edges regarding this aspect but I'm conscious that the main problem here is my child."

"She treated me well... she healed me. I was ungrateful too."

"She did what she had to. It's her duty to take care of you, as you for her. Didn't you?"

"..."

"You feel you could have done better?"

"I tried to give her the distance she asked for..."

"But?"

"..."

"You didn't want space after some time and she didn't want you."

Tobirama tore his gaze away. It infuriated him, and more so when it was told on his face. He already knew it for god's sake.

"I'm sorry, my dear. I didn't mean to rub it in your face. I just wanted to know if you are here cause you really like her or cause of your sense of duty."

"I don't know enough of her to say so."

"Well, if it bothers you so much that she doesn't like you then you should definitely like some parts of her."

"That's not enough to hold a relationship the kind the village needs."

"Then you are making this effort in part for duty."

"I came here cause I don't want to replicate my parent's relationship... I made her cry once. I don't want to repeat it and she hasn't forgiven me for that."

He looked truly contrite. Tobirama's voice inflection in his last phrase held most of the emotion Lady Kato had ever seen from him before in his adult life.

She knew him as a child as an idealist, smart brat but she could still see emotion easily through his little face. Butsuma and the war took away that capability very early from him. When she saw him again as an adolescent he had already been hardened into what he is today.

She was happy that Makoto could dig so deep into him without even trying. His mother would be happy that her children loved her enough not to do what his father did to her.

"I'm glad you keep the memory of your mother so close to your heart. It's all that's left for us women, you know? The love of our children since we aren't allowed to do much more."

"That's why Makoto didn't want this life –the one that comes with being a wife– it holds no glory, nor adventure. Maybe you can't understand it, I don't blame you."

"You were born with the upright while she wasn't, she had to fight every inch of what she has and it cost her tears and blood, hers and some of her friends. She will cling to that life until her last breath. That's why she's so stubborn and prideful. Once you have tasted the triumph and adrenaline it doesn't compare with just being the mother of someone who did great things, we are forgotten."

"..."

"You haven't thought about it from that point of view, haven't you?

"That's why I'm here...How did she get into that at all?"

"That's her decision to tell you, it's her little secret after all. I'm just sorry that I didn't stop it when it started. Don't misinterpret me, it helped a lot in the war and keeps doing so in peace, but it causes her pain. Sometimes ignorance is bliss."

"Lord Kato approved of her behavior?"

"Ha! My dear, Lord Kato was the one throwing wood to the fire when she read those martial entries, he said he saw potential... and she was his beloved daughter. You would understand if you had one of your own."

Tobirama wasn't so sure about that, and even so, the idea was stupidly far in his condition.

"But?"- now it was his turn to ask.

Sigh- "He promised her a life she couldn't have. When she came of age she asked him to disinherit her and send her to an abbey so she could keep her secret job while leaving her first daughter responsibilities behind."

"But he involved her too much in the war without the consent of the council... and then got sick."

"He was going to do so, he really meant it but–"

"He got sick."

"And he knew they wouldn't approve of his decision. Hashirama-dono has always been different, but the others... they could have hung us all."

Tobirama let the information set in his mind. It was enough for now and Lady Kato was sincere in her efforts to help to consolidate this stormy relationship.

"I'm neck deep in this too, my Lady. The moment my brother and I choose to ignore the fact that we had Kokuyo under our roof we set the rope around our necks. We need her with us, the attacks on the perimeter of Konoha haven't ended."

"I know, Kuren has told me about it."

That name again. He couldn't hide his discontent this time.

"You hold a grudge for what he said that night? He's immature and didn't measure the consequences of his words. He's been reprimanded, I assure you."

"It doesn't make the facts to be less true."

"Hmm, I didn't take you for a jealous type Tobirama-dono."

"I'm not."

"Are you sure? Then it's just because he got something you have been denied?"

Tobirama decided he had talked enough, he wasn't going to follow Lady Kato's game till the end. He left his seat, the conversation was over and he let her know by making a reverence and turning towards the door, he meant no disrespect, after all.

"Eh! You have such a short temper for a diplomat, my dear. I didn't mean to tease."

"Thank you for the information and your sincerity, my Lady."

"My husband's haori suits you. I'll send a servant to measure you to tailor some clothes for you. This is going to be a long path, I'm sure."

I only hope you are wrong my Lady."