Apritello, Leorai and Rasey blues. These scenes have been waiting to be put in a chapter for two and a half years, you guys. The first one is one of our personal favs XD

Third act is nearly here! We know it's been a long time coming, but thank you so much for your patience, and we hope you're enjoying the ride :D

As always HUGE thanks to our beta readers Queequegg and Theherocomplex. We honestly couldn't ask for better betas.

Previously...

The arrival of the future turtles is only a few hours away, and nobody's getting any sleep. Leo has barely even seen Karai after their talk. Donnie just found out through Raph that April and Casey have apparently been dating. Neither of them know Casey and April actually had a little... disagreement.

And the emergency signal on Casey's bike just went off...

Raph's feet barely grazed the ground. He soared over the Chinatown rooftops, Casey's GPS signal blinking ominously on his phone screen.

Reaching the corner in record time, he screeched to a halt to look down at the street below...

His stomach dropped.

Casey's bike lay abandoned on the sidewalk across the street.

Cold dread flooded his gut as he lunged onto the pavement below, and barely avoided being spotted by a couple of kids. Quickly retreating into the shadow of the fire escape, he waited for them to pass, eyes trained on Casey's bike. The brats seemed to move in slow motion, yammering on about their stupid basketball game.

Hurry up!

Finally, one pizza delivery scooter and a shop owner dumping dirty water down the sewer grate later, he jumped down and made a run across the street for the alley ahead.

The bike's front wheel was bent, a few spurs sticking out like whiskers on a cat. The tracker still beeping mutedly, Raph skirted around it, twirling to and fro.

"Casey? Casey!"

Not caring anymore that he was probably drawing attention, he frantically looked behind the dumpster and inside trash cans, his own pulse deafening. He acted all tough in front of his brothers, but unlike them, deep inside he was terrified every time that freaking alarm went off.

One of those times could be for real. This one could be for real.

So far all the evidence seemed to suggest it was. Wouldn't be the first time Casey went off on his own, playing lone wolf, the dumbass. After the other night at the warehouse, his grudge against Hun would've only gotten worse. If he'd seen something, he was stupid enough to go at it alone. Swivelling around on the spot, helpless, Raph grew more and more convinced that that was what happened, and decided to call for back-up.

On the other hand…

His finger froze over the call button and he stared at the pair of Converse he'd just spotted behind a nook in the wall. Incredulous, he moved over to see Casey sitting on some steps, back rested against a door and tapping his feet to the music on his earbuds.

Raph's insides boiled with an overwhelming combination of rage and relief as he stepped closer, breathing heavily and throwing his hands in the air. But the asshole was too enthralled in his drawings, humming, to notice him.

"Casey!" Raph growled, planting himself in front of him, which finally made him lift his head.

When he saw him, Casey yanked his earbuds off and opened his arms wide. "Raph! You came!" he exclaimed before suddenly erupting in giggles. "Ffhf-fhf-fh that's what she said…"

"The hell is this, dude? What happened to your bike?" Raph cried, still catching his breath and definitely not in the mood for dirty jokes.

"I told you, I crashed it!" Casey started trying to push himself to his feet, sketchbook in one hand, and a green glass bottle in the other. "I know y'read my text, Raph. I saw the double check, an' you didn't text me back, you jerk," he slurred.

"Are you drunk?" Raph demanded, not so much a question as a realization. Casey tripped on his own feet several times before he managed to plant one sole flat on the ground. That hieroglyph of a text made a lot more sense now.

"I don't think there's even a name for what I am. I'm not drunk, I'm…" Casey completed his garbled sentence with a wet, sloppy raspberry, then tried to stand up straight, but stumbled again, catching himself on Raph's shoulder.

"How many times do we have to tell you? Emergency button's for emergencies!" Raph groused, holding him upright from his armpits.

"Battery died," Casey said dismissively before leaning in, breath that could disinfect wounds. "Raph, Raph, look at this. We should totally practice it." And he shoved the sketchbook at Raph.

While Casey leaned on the wall, casually wiping his nose with his sleeve, Raph looked down at the page, where an unrealistically brawny Casey swung a bat at a couple of thugs… from on top of Raph's shoulders, which he was riding astride like a bronco. He couldn't help notice the sultry drawings of girls who looked suspiciously like April on the opposite page as well, but what else was new?

"You think Leo'll like the new fight technique?" Casey smirked beneath hooded eyes.

Raph slapped the sketchbook shut. "Is this about your date? Did it flop?"

Judging by the sudden gravity on Casey's face, it was about that exactly.

"It flopped like… like a flaccid…" Casey made vague undulating gestures with his hand, tongue out. He swayed a bit, then went very quiet, mouth ajar.

"You alright?" Raph asked after a couple of seconds of suspicious silence, and took half a step back in case he got sick.

If he threw up, Raph threw up.

But Casey waved his hand. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just got this 'Moose', but we didn't get to open it, and I didn't wanna waste it." He went to take another swig but Raph snatched it from him before he could.

"It's wasting you. Lemme take you home."

"Wait, wait! Come on, Raph, buddy-poo," he cooed, and Raph cringed. "I need some bro talk, I need it bad." Casey eased himself back down on the ground and patted the spot next to him. "Just sit with me for a bit, 'kay?"

Raph sighed, glaring around at the less than cosy surroundings, but kicked away a couple of candy wrappers and a dirty tissue, and sat next to Casey.

"The hell are you drinking, man?" he said, ogling the bottle in his hand, turning it around to look at the name—'Tipsy Moose Mezcal'—then brought it up to his lips and took a sip. "BLECH!"

Casey burst into cackles. "You made the lemon-sucking face! Sweet summer child!"

"This stuff's gonna liquify your liver."

"But it's so good."

Raph snorted. "If you say so."

Casey snatched the bottle back and shook the remaining liquid, looking sad that it was almost gone.

Raph knew Casey would give booze the occasional whirl, but nothing like this. He already had a vice to keep him busy, which might be only slightly healthier—for him, not so much for the crooks and vandals of New York. The night must have been very short on criminals for it to have escalated like this.

"So… You and April. Does this mean it's over or...?" Raph ventured, trying hard not to sound hopeful.

"I dunno. Maybe. I'm such a dick. I don't even know why she want'd to date me. She doesn't like me, she likes Donnie!"

Raph whipped his head around, expecting Casey to be laughing at his own joke. But to his surprise, Casey seemed dead serious. "She… told you this?"

"Not with words, but…" Casey said, gesturing at invisible evidence, and Raph reeled.

If that was true, then he had screwed up. He'd just told Donnie that April and Casey were dating, and that April didn't like him like that, and never will.

Hold on. April did personally confirm she didn't like Donnie, didn't she? And Casey was drunk, and hurt, and probably just venting. Surely, he didn't really believe it... He probably wouldn't even remember half of this come morning.

All Raph knew now was that Casey would not be dating April anymore, and however selfish it was, it filled him with such relief he wanted to punch the air in celebration. He swallowed the urge and contented himself with an inward grin.

Of course, Casey felt rejected now. He was hurt and vulnerable. But he'd be out and about—on the market so to speak—soon enough. If it wasn't April, it'd be some other girl. Better enjoy his friend's bachelorhood while it lasted.

"But you know?" Casey went on, stepping in the way of Raph's train of thought, and he sounded a little surprised when he said, "Whatever. I don't even care that much about that. I mean I really like April and all, but… Now she's not gonna be my friend anymore, and it's gonna be all weird," he whined.

"Nah, no way. April's not like that," Raph said without thinking, then paused—because there was that one time, he recalled, before they'd even met Casey, when she didn't talk to them for weeks. Although they had recently mutated her father… So he kinda got that. And she forgave them, in the end. So yeah, he may be pissed at her at the moment, but he stood by his words.

Casey wasn't listening. "Don't ever date girls, man," he whined. "Especially if they're your friend. Take it from me. Girlfriends are hard."

A bitter chuckle escaped Raph. "You won't have to worry about that with me."

"'Cause you're a mutant?" Casey asked casually, twisting his torso to look him dead in the eye like only drunks and eye doctors do.

"Well, yeah," Raph said with a complacent shrug. "Me and my brothers, we're kind of in romance limbo. Not a big chance someone'll fall for one of us, you know, 'cause of the green, and the ugly."

Raph had said as much many times before, just to make a point to show how little he cared. This was the first time he faltered, and he chastised himself for letting it show.

And when he shot Casey a hesitant side glance, he saw his friend frown in what looked like bewilderment. "Dude, you're not ugly. In fact, you're pretty awesome-looking."

Raph barked a laugh, but Casey still wasn't laughing. "You think I'm awesome-looking?"

"Yeah, man! Giant freakin' muscly turtle mutant with moves like a cat? I'll never un'nerstand it. Wish I had those arms. You got, you know, the sexy scar there, and—okay, seriously, what's with the super green eyes? That's gotta be the mutagen."

To Casey's very close stare, Raph could only shrug awkwardly.

"It's defin'ly the mutagen," Casey concluded, squinting. "But yeah, like, if I was a chick I'd be all over you."

Raph laughed, not because he found anything funny but because he didn't know what else to reply. Drunk Casey's adulations were both mortifying and… also kinda nice. Even if Casey was probably just trying to cheer him up. Though, come to think of it, drunk Casey was possibly the most sincere person he'd met.

"It's like," Casey went on, and let out a giggle. "You know how sometimes you're like 'shit, if only I was gay'?

Raph felt his own brows raise slowly, powerless to stop them. He definitely didn't have an answer for that one. "I think you've had enough Moose for one day, Case," he managed, confiscating the bottle.

Casey didn't even seem to notice. "No, but seriously, like… Fuck chicks, man, they're too complicated. And I mean fuck them as in fuck 'em! Not as in…"

"I get it, Case."

"That's what I mean, bro! You get me!"

"Nobody 'gets' you," Raph retorted around a grin.

"But you do," Casey insisted with a wet smile and droopy eyelids, latching onto Raph's arm. "You're my best friend, man. Love ya."

"Come on, don't get corny." Raph shoved him away, but found himself smiling.

"And I know I'm drunk and all but I really mean it. I love you, man."

"Yeah, yeah, I love ya too, Case," Raph said, exasperated, though his anger levels were the lowest they'd been in a while. Ignoring the part of him that wanted to stay, he started heaving himself and Casey up. "Now move your ass so I can get you home to sleep this off. You really picked the perfect night to get roaring drunk, man." And when Casey looked blankly at him, he clarified, "Future us, remember?"

"Oh, shit, dude, that's true! I better get home to sleep," Casey mumbled, though by the looks of him he could just as easily have gone to sleep right there.

"Yeah, I think you're right," Raph sang sarcastically as he maneuvered Casey to his feet. "And Case, do me a favor. Next time, try using a pay-phone or something, okay? It saves me the near heart attack."

"You wouldn't've come if you knew what it was about."

"Of course I would've come."

"Aww." Casey punched Raph's shoulder, losing balance and almost toppling them both to the ground.

Raph set himself, grabbed Casey's shoulders and propped him against the brick wall. Once he was sure he wouldn't tumble over like a broomstick, he took the busted bike and hid it behind the dumpster.

"Come on, Case, grab on," Raph said, gesturing Casey on.

"You're getting a taste for carrying me home like a sack o' loot— Oooooh, bridal style? Now that's more like it." Casey cackled when Raph picked him up, absolutely in love with his own joke. He laced his arms around Raph's neck. "Let's get married, Raph!"

"Don't make me drop you," Raph threatened and peeked around the corner in case anyone had heard. The coast was clear, so he made a sprint for the next alley, Casey bouncing happily in his arms.

"No, but, like, I could wear white—wait… you know, actually, in theory I shouldn't wear white—Raph, are you a virgin?"

Once again, they almost ended up in a ditch when Raph jumped and stumbled.

"I don't care how drunk you are, Casey, we're not having this conversation!" he grumbled through his teeth once he'd regained his footing, cheeks ablaze.

"It doesn't matter, dude, you can wear white either way. Nobody follows that rule anymore."

Donnie stayed out scrounging for parts long enough to make sure he missed April coming to the lair, and returned only when he thought she might be asleep. That had bought him a few hours to compose himself before he had to face her. The downside was he'd also had plenty of time to think… and think… and then think some more.

That's why she'd been acting strange lately—the evasive glances, the awkward pauses, the hugs. Not because she felt something for me; because she felt guilty.

How long had she kept it from him? How much longer had they planned to keep him in the dark?

The problem was, somehow, deep down Donnie still harbored hopes, that Raph had misunderstood, that Casey was only bragging as usual. And he didn't want to hope anymore—he just needed a little time, to… come to grips with the idea—of them, being an item.

She'd texted him a while ago, asking how it was going, and whether he needed any help. He'd kindly declined, said that darn component was being evasive, told her not to wait for him and get a good night's rest. The future turtles would be arriving in just a few hours.

As if that wasn't enough to keep him awake all night.

Maybe it really was a good thing Raph had told him, or he might have tried something. His guts squirmed nauseatingly just imagining how that would've gone. Or maybe it was fatigue…

Both. It was both. Plus a bit too much black coffee perhaps. Those three-or-so nights of no sleep were definitely taking a toll, he concluded as he warily dragged himself through the dampness of the sewers. By the time he made it back to the lair, he could barely lift his feet off the ground, his heart rushing, desperate for rest. As he entered the lab through the garage doors, he slipped off his duffel bag full of parts and let it drop to the ground. He'd put it away in the morning…

Shaking dew from his plastron and numb bare arms with an equally numb hand, he reached his cot, tucked away in a corner of the lab, blankets tangled into a messy bundle. For a few seconds he stared down at them, as if they might straighten themselves out. Realizing there was no choice but to make the bed before he could even get in it, he let out a reluctant grunt, which in turn elicited a cough from an itchy throat. He hadn't realized how dry his mouth was and decided to go for some hydration first.

No coffee, his conscience warned and he nodded to himself, promising to find something without caffeine for once.

On his way to the lab doors, he stopped by his desk, swaying a little, and gazed at the last drawer—where he kept April's unfinished armor.

Might as well put it in a box and store it away, he thought bitterly, eyes drifting towards the music box sitting dusty and silent on top of the closet. She probably won't like it anyway.

Donnie sighed, squeezing his eyes shut, ashamed of himself. Ashamed for thinking this way about April. She didn't commit a crime, she was just with Casey. Deep down, he always knew this was coming. Way to prove Raph right, crybaby.

He shook his head, and turned away from the desk.

The common-room lights were dimmed, a sign that bedtime had come and gone. Lead-footed, he wobbled across the dark space in a daze, never noticing the light spilling out from the kitchen.

He wasn't used to encountering anyone in his nocturnal excursions to the coffee maker. So when he pulled the drapes to the side and saw both Leo and Mikey there, he froze, startled, his two brothers staring back at him in surprise.

"Howdy Dee!" Mikey then greeted him by the stove, wearing his flowery apron and wiping a glass with a dirty cloth, while Leo just looked on from his seat at the table. "Come on in, part'ner, I'll pour you a drink!" Mikey offered, setting the grungy glass down on the counter with a clunk and slapping the cloth at fault over his shoulder.

Not bad, but he needs to work on that Southern accent, Donnie thought meekly, and sat when Mikey patted the table next to Leo's spot.

"I was getting kinda worried," Leo said. "Did you find everything you need?"

Donnie had wondered if his brother would still hold the entire Lotus fiasco against him, but his voice still bore no signs of any hard feelings. Quite glad for that, Donnie drew a weary breath before replying, "Yeah, yeah. It took a while."

Mikey came back showing them a steaming pot. "Darjeeling tea?" When Donnie looked questioningly at him, he explained, very seriously, "It's the tea that sad people drink."

"Where did you hear—You know what? Nevermind. I'll take one, thanks." He was never a huge fan of tea—coffee was his great love—but his throat seemed pretty excited for it.

Mikey poured a cup and slid it down to Donnie, who barely caught it before it tumbled over.

"So… what's troublin' ya, buddy?" Mikey said, getting back to wiping more dirt into the same glass, leaning heavily on the table towards Donnie as if he wanted to inspect a freckle on his face.

"You know, Mikey... I'm not really up for chatting right now," Donnie said wanly, rubbing a few drops of tea off his hand.

Mikey paused, worry flashing through his eyes, then finally—thankfully—dropping the accent, he said, "I see. Do you have woman troubles too?"

Donnie looked around at Leo. His brother was enjoying his own cup, and quickly put it down to say, "Mikey, I swear, for every time you say 'woman troubles' out loud, I will hide one of your action figures. And Manhattan's the playground."

Mikey lifted his hands in surrender, looking only slightly offended. "S'alright! I know when I'm not needed. You guys got stuff to share with each other, I respect that." He placed the maltreated glass down and walked out, apron and all.

"Just get some sleep, Mikey," Leo called.

"Yeah, yeah."

As Mikey's steps faded, the kitchen was engulfed in dreary silence. Leo and Donnie both sighed in unison, which made them exchange bemused looks.

"So… Karai?" Donnie said cautiously, willing to use his last minutes of consciousness on this, and while he was on it, maybe get his mind off of April.

Leo replied with a wry, "What else?" Then he jabbed a thumb behind him. "Mikey might joke around, but he had a few cups of my 'sad-people tea' himself before you arrived."

"He's worried."

"Obviously, or why would he be drinking tea?" He chuckled. "He's been wiggly all day, but not in the usual way. Ever since Karai said those things..."

"That Lotus clan really stirred things up, huh?" Donnie grinned clumsily, wincing at his understatement of the year, and fruitlessly racked his poor washed-out neurons for anything cleverer to say.

Leo let out a hefty sigh. "I don't know what to do," he said slowly, clouded eyes on his cup. "It's like she's learned nothing from what happened to her."

There was a pause, and Donnie waited, itching to ask Leo what had happened in Karai's room after their fight earlier, but not wanting to pry if Leo wasn't ready. Neither he nor Karai had said anything when they got back to the dojo together for the remainder of training, acting as though nothing happened. As far as anyone knew, they'd made peace.

It turned out Leo was ready—or desperate enough—to disclose now.

"I got her to talk to me. Finally. I had no idea she was so… tormented. She has these horrible nightmares, and sleep paralysis—which I didn't know about." He glanced at Donnie as though he might know something. But this was all news to Donnie, and not very good news at that.

Being just as worried—on top of sleep-deprived—Donnie could only offer an empathetic grimace, which judging from the dejection in Leo's face, wasn't nearly comforting enough.

"So… Apparently she's been in the balance from the beginning. It only took Hachisu-no-Hana's very timely proposal to tip her over the edge. She said she misses being Foot," he continued, and when Donnie perked up in alarm, he gave him a dismissive hand wave. "Not like that, she didn't say she wanted to go back. But things were a lot easier for her back then, weren't they? When she was in the Foot. I mean, she was heir to a very rich, powerful clan. Now she's…. with us." His snout crinkled in derision. "This was just our probation period. And we're failing."

Donnie was speechless. He never knew how bad it was. Karai was never one for chit-chat, and with all that makeup she wore all the time, they couldn't see the lack of sleep on her face. Donnie guessed that was the point. That morning had been the first time he'd seen her makeup-less, pretty much since he turned her human again. If he'd seen those dark circles under her eyes earlier, he'd have been concerned. He would have spoken up.

"If something happened to her…" Leo said, a shadow in his eyes, hands balled into tight fists. Donnie knew, if something happened to Karai, Leo would blame himself and nobody else.

"Should we keep an eye on her in case she tries something?" Donnie asked pitifully as he distractedly picked at a chip in his ceramic cup, feeling as though he'd swallowed a brick.

"We can't stop her. She's not our prisoner, after all. She can leave anytime she wants." Leo's words dripped with cold irony, and inside Donnie the brick turned to ice.

"Why didn't she talk to us?" Leo went on. "Why does she have to be so stubborn? I thought I had it bad with Raph!"

"You can't really blame her," Donnie said matter-of-factly. At least 'factly' came easy. "What you described are clear symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress. No wonder, too. It's gonna take time, but she'll bounce back. You'll see." He hoped he sounded more confident than he felt. He hadn't seen Leo so disheartened since his difficult recovery in Northampton, and it was disquieting. Donnie felt the obligation—the need—to cheer him up, somehow, if he had to scrape the bottom of his optimism tank.

Leo scoffed. "So far, she's bouncing like an anvil. I don't know, Donnie. I feel like there's things about her that will never change."

"Well, maybe that's alright."

Leo shook his head slowly, as though doubting it. "Shredder haunts her day and night. It's all she thinks about. She's not gonna stop until she kills him—or until she gets herself killed. And that's so much like Shredder, it… It's… scary."

A shiver trickled up Donnie's spine, remembering the future turtles' half-warning. Then again…

Something glinted deep in his optimism tank. A small nugget. Donnie picked it up and gripped it tight with all the determination his drained body could muster.

"But we're not gonna let that happen, now are we?" He pulled himself straight and faced Leo. "These future guys… They've got a trick or two up their sleeve, I know it. They have a plan." The phrase was already becoming a bit of a mantra.

"That's what scares me," Leo answered. "I have a feeling whatever they're here for, it involves Karai, or why would they have mentioned her, twice? It's like a bad omen." He leaned on his elbows, gripping his own cranium.

Donnie pressed on. Amazingly, he realized he actually believed what he was saying, which gave him confidence. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Leo. We still have to meet them. They said they were coming to help, didn't they? Who better to help than someone who knows about the future? I find that reassuring."

"Maybe you're right. It's just—" Leo sighed wistfully, hands clasped around his cup. "I really thought things were looking up, you know?"

"Yeah. Me too," Donnie said downheartedly, thoughts momentarily drifting off as the statement rang true on more than one front. This was not his week for sure. This wasn't anyone's week.

"I thought she was adapting well—that we could make her feel at home."

"But Leo, didn't we? We helped set up her room, included her in everything, picked up stuff for her collections—even Raph! We all did our best to make her feel welcome. And she can tell, I'm sure of it! We didn't fail yet. This is just a bump in the road. She loves us!" Donnie elbowed Leo, then snapping his fingers he added, "Look, she got the sword of Yurikawa for Splinter; her new armor, which she made herself, with the engraved Hamato seal and everything—and you should've seen her when she was making it: she wanted so bad for us to like it. Not to mention the new look!" He motioned at his head, flipping an invisible mane.

As Donnie spoke, Leo's mouth had started curving upwards. "That tiny tsum-tsum turtle-rat totem in her room."

Donnie giggled at the mention, the glimmer of hope glinting in Leo's eyes giving him strength. "I think all of this was her way of marking a fresh start. And was it just me, or did it also kinda feel like a gift, for us?"

"Yeah, I think she did. With the fashion catwalk." He chuckled, clearly revelling in the memory, and added dreamily, "Man, she looked amazing."

Donnie gazed at him with a growing smile. Do I make that face when I talk about April? I don't blame them for making fun of me.

Then he remembered again why he was there, having Darjeeling Tea with his brother, and the icy brick was back—and it had a twin brother. Would things ever be the same with April?

"I know it's probably petty of me now, with everything that's going on, but..." Leo said with a bashful sideways smirk. "I really, really like her. I just want to see her happy—I want to make her happy."

"It's not petty. You love her," Donnie replied in all certainty with a longing smile.

"Yeah, I love her." Leo ducked his head, blushing. Donnie was pretty sure this was the first time he'd said it. "Even if she's always trying to get a rise out of me. Or maybe that's why. Wait, dammit, that sounded terrible!" Leo actually laughed. Maybe there was hope! "Anyway, I just wish she didn't have to be so mysterious about everything. Kunoichi, am I right?"

Donnie chuckled through his nose. "I hear that."

Leo nodded pensively. After a few seconds, he said, "Speaking of kunoichi, Donnie, it's your turn. What's this about April?"

Donnie's eyes had drifted shut in the silence, and he started slightly when he felt Leo pat his shell, eyes springing open again. At April's mention he reeled, heart rate through the roof, not ready yet for the spotlight to shine on his own battered feelings. "What? I didn't say anything."

Leo hit him with a don't-take-me-for-an-idiot face. "Isn't this what we're doing? Two guys sharing woes over a 'drink'? Kind of our own private support group?"

"Losers Anonymous?" Donnie suggested ironically.

"We'll make that our temp name. Now, come on, spill. I know you were avoiding April earlier. What parts were urgent enough that you'd miss sleepover with her?" he said sardonically, shooting him a lopsided smirk, and Donnie bit his lip.

He got him there.

"And now you're here, having sad-people tea."

Donnie grimaced, considering. None of his brothers had been extremely supportive on his thing with April in the past, including Leo. If they weren't making fun of him, they'd be telling him how pointless it was. Ever since Timothy got frozen, he hadn't had anyone to really talk to about her.

But Leo had trusted him with his feelings, so he figured he could give it a shot. Maybe get a second opinion...

He took a deep breath, steeling himself. "I've just suddenly realised how you were all right about me and her. That she's never going to… like me. Not the way I like her. I should've listened to you guys long ago."

A pause, then Leo issued a careful, "Oh?"

It was a start. At least he wasn't going for the condescending 'I told you so'.

"But there were things, you know?" he protested on inertia. "Things that made me think it was possible. At one point I actually felt pretty optimistic."

"What things?"

Donnie thought of all the little gestures, the smiles, the touches, that feeling of being the object of April's warm gaze, her cheeks flushed. How could he explain that? As he grasped for an answer, he was at once transported back to Northampton. The sun felt warm on his unaccustomed skin, and nature plagued his nose and ears. Then came the sounds of woodchopping, and before he knew it April had taken over his every sense.

"Back at the farmhouse, she kinda… sorta… kissed me," Donnie managed through the haze of ghost lips and fingers.

Leo gave him a blank stare. It was, after all, nothing new. He had seen April kiss him on many occasions. But he didn't know about that one time, nor did anyone. Besides him and April, of course...

He leaned in and whispered, "...on the lips."

"Really?" Leo squeaked in surprise. That was more like it. "But… that's… good, right?"

"I thought so too!" Donnie said, feeling the same goofy smile spread on his own face, before he once again remembered why they were talking about it, and the dream took a plunge back down to rocky ground. "But I guess that's out the window now." He finished hollowly, resting his chin on his hand.

"Why? What happened today?"

"Well, I think it's supposed to be a secret, but…" The air felt suddenly thick and coarse in his windpipe, like he was breathing through sand. Saying it out loud just made it sound all the more real. "Apparently April's... dating Casey. It's official."

"Oh…" Leo said slowly. "Did she tell y—"

"No," Donnie snapped, cutting that question short. "Raph told me."

"Raph," Leo repeated, looking slightly confused. "Um, you know Raph can be… a bit blunt sometimes."

"Pfeh!"

"What I mean is, are you sure he wasn't just... exaggerating?"

"Nope, he was absolutely positive," Donnie sang. "Got it straight from the horse's mouth."

"I see. Sorry, Donnie."

Sorry. The unhelpful word echoed in his mind, sad and tiny. It matched how he felt.

"How could I have been so naive?" he blathered on, words pouring out of his mouth completely unhindered at this point, like a spraying champagne bottle he couldn't cork. "I didn't wanna see it. I kept hoping for the impossible, even when a part of me knew. A part of me always knew! Look at me! Who in their right mind would choose someone like me over virtually anybody else? Some genius I am."

"I guess we're both geniuses."

Donnie turned at his brother's tone, and it took his sluggish mind a couple of seconds to process why his brother suddenly looked so miserable.

He quickly back-pedalled. "Not that Karai… You know, it's different: she was pretty much born a ninja. Normal was never part of her plan."

"A lot of things weren't part of her plan. Especially not us," Leo said, a sad lilt to his level voice that made Donnie want to punch himself in the mouth. Then he added with calm resignation, "I guess we have to be realistic."

Donnie let out a derisive snort. "That's what Raph said." And he hated, hated, thinking his meathead of a brother might be right—that they'd been fooling themselves all along, that it wasn't in their right to expect anything from anyone. But he was starting to believe he had a point. It was already a miracle that April was their friend.

"But you wanna know what the funny thing is?" Donnie said, as this was something he'd just now realized. "April and Casey getting together sucks all on its own—to me," he conceded with a one-armed shrug. "But… well, I guess a part of me always knew it was coming. Heck, a few days ago, I was… fine... with it. I'm actually more hung up on the fact that she didn't trust me enough to tell me—that she thought she had to hide it from me. They both did."

"They just don't wanna hurt you."

"Yeah, well…"

"Donnie, no! Don't do that," Leo chastised. "Did you consider she's probably just afraid?"

"Of what? That I'll go mad with jealousy and jump on Casey?" he accused, bristling. Did Leo think this way about him too? Did they all?

But Leo scrunched his face in a bewildered grimace. "No! Of losing you!"

Donnie relaxed, embarrassed. "Oh." And then Leo's words really hit him. Did April think he wouldn't want to be his friend anymore, once he knew he had no chance?

A voice in his head asked him, challenging, Well, would you? It took him approximately 63 milliseconds to come up with a rotund, how dare you?

Leo looked him in the eyes. "Look, it might not be exactly what you'd like it to be, but we've all seen you together. What you two have, whatever it is, it's special."

"I know, I—I don't wanna ruin that…" Donnie said, nodding to himself as much as Leo. "I know."

"Good. You know. Then give her a chance. For all you know she's waiting for the right moment. There's quite a bit going on lately if you haven't noticed," Leo jested, taking a sip from his tea.

"There's two or three novels worth of material just from the past week alone." Donnie chuckled.

Leo's words resonated in his mind. What you two have, it's special. We've all seen you together. His pruned up heart came to life with a new breath of hope, and he swallowed, dangerously close to choking up.

"You're right, Leo. I trust her. I do," he said once he'd gotten a hold of his voice, nodding vehemently, hoping he could hold on to that feeling.

"You'll be okay, D. And when the time comes, you make sure she knows that."

With a long, averse sigh, dreading the moment, Donnie agreed. "Yeah."

Leo sighed too, and Donnie looked around at him, smiling crookedly, because he'd suddenly seen himself and Leo from the outside: two miserable-looking turtles sipping tea at midnight and crying over their respective crushes.

"Boy, are we screwed," Donnie said.

Leo contributed with a self-deprecating jeer. "What are we even doing?"

"Beats me, man"

They both broke into a fit of giggles, the kind that starts late at night when drunk on lack of sleep.

When they were done, Leo lifted his cup. "Here's to being screwed."

They toasted and each took a gulp out of their cups. Donnie then peered down at his.

"Hey, isn't Darjeeling Tea black tea?"

A guilty smile crept onto Leo's face. "Actually, yeah..."

"Uh-oh. I promised my body I'd let it sleep now," Donnie mumbled, slouching ever lower.

Now that the therapy session was over, not even all those stimulants in his system were keeping him awake. His thoughts felt stickier, his eyelids heavier. Yet, for some reason, he still lifted the cup to down the rest of it. Leo stopped it halfway to Donnie's mouth, enveloping the top of the cup in his palm and gingerly setting it on the table.

"How about some warm milk instead?"

Donnie couldn't resist—in that he had no strength. "I'm not that big a fan of tea anyway."

Gahhh so many feels. What did you think? Did you get the feels?

Remember, reviews are writer chow!

And we're pretty sure next chapter's THE ONE. THAT WORMHOLE IS NEARLY HERE. OMG WHO'S COMING THROUGH IT? WHAT DO THEY WANT?