Hello!

I'm in a pretty good mood. I had pancakes after eating only eggs for a few days and I crocheted an Atsushi plushie.

Here's a new chapter!

Atsushi found Akutagawa to be increasingly difficult.

First of all, he wasn't the easiest person to get along with, which Atsushi had learned upon their first meeting. He'd hoped their interactions would run more smoothly at some point, but no such luck. Akutagawa mostly ignored him, only really acknowledging him with Dazai's prompting.

And things only seemed to get worse.

Only a few hours after he'd been officially accepted into the Port Mafia, Dazai had told him that Akutagawa was also in the infirmary since he'd sustained some damage when Atsushi had turned. According to Dazai, Akutagawa had helped restrain his tiger form.

If their relationship hadn't been difficult before, it definitely would be now.

So, Atsushi pushed himself out of bed to try to smooth things over as quickly as possible.

When he tried to talk to Akutagawa, the boy didn't look at him as though he wasn't listening at all. And when he finally did look at Atsushi, he glared at him as though Atsushi had spit in his face instead of apologizing profusely. With those narrowed eyes and bared teeth, Atsushi knew that his hopes for being forgiven were dashed.

So, that left them where they were now.

Akutagawa didn't ignore him or simply glare at him anymore, instead, he took to trying to pick a fight and outright insulting Atsushi when Dazai wasn't within earshot. On days when he was feeling especially bold, he'd sneer at Atsushi right in front of Dazai, which often led to a stinging remark from Dazai, which made Atsushi feel the smallest twinge of sympathy for Akutagawa, which quickly vanished after Akutagawa opened his mouth again.

/-/-/

"The Port Mafia isn't a place for the weak," Akutagawa snarled at him one day after a rough training session with Dazai. "You'll be dead before you even go on an actual mission."

Atsushi bit back a snide response. Akutagawa wasn't his superior, he knew that, but he did have seniority. And truthfully, Atsushi was a bit scared of him.

He was a killer. And… really Atsushi supposed he was a killer too, but whatever deaths he'd caused had been accidental. Akutagawa had killed people with the full intention of killing people. So had probably everyone else in the Port Mafia, but being close to Akutagawa, hearing him talk about how easily he could kill and how frequently he'd done it… It made Atsushi feel a shiver down his spine.

"I'll probably wind up skewering you if we ever spar," he said, glaring at Atsushi. "If you ever improve at all…"

Atsushi shrunk back, unsure of what to say back.

Akutagawa seemed to be waiting for a response.

Silence. Frightened eyes. Bared teeth.

He sneered in disgust when Atsushi gave no reply, and stalked away without another word.

A deep sigh of exasperation or relief escaped him. He himself couldn't even tell which it was.

Every offer of peace was met with bared teeth and harsh words. It was like Akutagawa took every attempt at conversation as a challenge. And every glace in his general direction as an insult.

It wasn't as though Atsushi had been looking for friendships since leaving the orphanage, but he'd been hoping to avoid making enemies… And yet, finding people who wanted him dead seemed to be the only thing he'd succeeded in.

/-/-/

After it had been revealed that Atsushi was the tiger, he'd eventually started hoping for some benefits for harboring a supernatural beast. Though, overall, he really wished that he had nothing to do with the tiger at all. But… If he had to live with that tiger- that thing- He might as well find some silver lining.

For example, he wished the tiger would offer him a decent sense of direction. On his own, Atsushi had no idea where he was going. Nearly every other time he'd left his apartment, Dazai or Akutagawa had been with him.

And now he was kicking himself for not paying better attention to his surroundings.

This time, Akutagawa had texted him an address and a time with a curt message of "Don't be late."

At the moment, Atsushi was five minutes late, his phone was dying, and when he'd tried to call Akutagawa and Dazai for help, no one had answered-which brought him some relief since those were embarrassingly awkward calls to make. So, that left him to wander around the streets, trying to match the street names to the one in the text.

He couldn't help but imagine how pitiful he must have looked, doubling back when he hit a dead end and glancing down several roads to make sure he was going the right way.

He knew roughly where Port Mafia headquarters was, but going in there to ask for directions would be beyond embarrassing and awkward. However, he couldn't think of a better solution. So… That's what he would do.

You would think I don't have enough dignity left to even feel embarrassment anymore. He thought as he trudged down the street. Nope… I still manage to feel it…

He wondered how it would all go.

Would he just approach a receptionist at the front desk and just say, "Hello, I'm looking for Dazai Osamu, the demon prodigy, I'm one of his students. I got an address to meet him at, but my memory isn't great and my phone is dead so I can't see what it is. Do you know where he'd be?"

He cringed when he thought about what he would say, his face heating even though he was the only one who could hear the words. Atsushi pressed his hands against his face, rubbing his eyes as if to wake up a little and hunching over slightly, making himself smaller. He must have looked so pathetic.

"Hey, kid, you know this isn't the safest part of the city, right?"

Atsushi jumped at hearing a voice so close, taking too long to realize that he was being addressed. He glanced around frantically for a moment, trying to find the speaker among the few people walking around him on the street.

"Did you get lost or something?" A man with red hair asked. He had a rough voice that made Atsushi flinch.

Atsushi stammered before he could get his words out. "Y-Yes, I got lost…"

The man looked almost annoyed as if Atsushi had given him an answer that he'd heard too many times today. "You're in Port Mafia territory," he warned in a half scolding tone. "If you turn around, take a left at the third street, and follow that road for a while, you'll be out." He seemed to look down at Atsushi even though they stood about eye to eye. "I suggest you leave. You look like an easy mark."

Atsushi blinked, surprised by the advice. Though, it was also kind of weird; the man didn't have concern written across his face or worry in his eyes. Even though Atsushi didn't necessarily need the advice, he still appreciated it.

"I… umm… Thank you," he began, stumbling over his words. "But I-I'm-" He stopped himself. The man looked like he was in the Port Mafia, but he'd never explicitly said he was, and casually saying that he was in a massive criminal organization seemed risky. Ultimately, he decided that the man in front of him was likely Port Mafia as well. He couldn't totally explain what made him decide on that. Perhaps it was the black clothes he wore or the lingering scent of blood on him, which was the same faint smell that he'd grown to notice on Dazai and Akutagawa.

He swallowed hard before saying, "I'm in the Port Mafia."

The man's eyebrows shot up. "Seriously?"

Atsushi looked down at his hands, feeling more discouraged than offended by the disbelief in the man's voice. "Yeah."

The man squinted at him and tilted his head as if seeing Atsushi from a different angle would make him look more like a member of the Port Mafia. It must not have worked because he straightened and sighed slightly.

Atsushi squirmed under his gaze.

Now is as good a time as any to ask…

"Umm… I-I have to train, a-and…" He bit his lip, trying to find the least pathetic way to say what he needed to. "I can't find where I'm supposed to go."

It still sounded pathetic, but at least the words were out there now.

The man looked at him with a mix of pity and irritation.

"And I don't know where I'm supposed to go because I don't remember the address and my phone is dead," Atsushi finished as quietly and quickly as he could, partially hoping that his last statement would go unnoticed. He looked down right after he said it, playing with the hem of his shirt so he wouldn't see the disgust that was likely in the man's face.

"Who's your direct superior?"

Relief came over Atsushi in a rush; he could actually answer that question.

He raised his head. "I'm Dazai-san's student."

Atsushi was not prepared to see the shift of light in the man's eyes. His bright blue eyes turned stormy in an instant as if the mere mention of Dazai's name meant the end of the world. His face suddenly twisted into a scowl.

Atsushi winced. Did I say something wrong?

The man gave a deep sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Of course you're his student," he mumbled, face twisting in annoyance instead of rage this time, and he muttered something about hating to talk to Dazai.

"Uh… I can go-"

"Stay."

The command seemed so sudden that Atsushi froze in his place.

Am I in trouble?

"I'll find him for you," he said, pulling out his phone and punching in some numbers. "It wouldn't surprise me if your situation is his fault."

"It's not his-"

The man shushed him before he could finish his sentence, pressing his phone to his ear.

"Dazai!" He half yelled into the phone, attracting some stares from bystanders. Atsushi shrunk back at his tone. "Where are you?!" A pause. "Because I found your apprentice wandering around the city looking for you!"

Atsushi's face reddened a bit at that statement.

Dazai's voice came through the phone, though Atsushi couldn't quite make out his words.

"The one who isn't Akutagawa." Then, "Well, his phone is dead." And then, "Idiot, this is your fault. Doesn't matter how, crap like this is always your fault!"

Dazai's voice again.

"Don't give me orders!"

He ended the call with, "Go die already!"

The man pocketed his phone and looked at Atsushi. "So," he said casually. "I'm helping you get there."

"Y-You don't have to if-"

"It's fine," he cut Atsushi off. "I wasn't doing anything important and you look like you'll get jumped or in some way killed on the way there."

Atsushi couldn't quite argue with that logic.

He extended a gloved hand to Atsushi. "I'm Nakahara Chuuya, by the way."

Atsushi took his hand and shook it. "My name is Nakajima Atsushi."

"You're the weretiger, aren't you?"

The question made Atsushi tense up. "Y-yeah," he muttered, following behind Nakahara.

"You don't sound overly thrilled about it," Nakahara said bluntly.

Atsushi laced and unlaced his fingers. "I can't control it," he murmured.

"What did you say?"

"I-I can't… It takes over," he said a little louder so he could be heard. "I can't control when it happens, and I can't stop it." He took a deep breath in. He'd know that he was the tiger for a little more than a week; he should have been more adjusted to the fact! He shouldn't have felt his throat tighten whenever he talked about it. "And I don't remember when it happens or what I've done or… or…" He stopped himself, clamping his mouth shut to stop the words from tumbling out against his will.

He'd said too much. He must have sounded so whiney to someone in the Port Mafia, to someone who was well accustomed to death and violence.

Nakahara stopped walking. Atsushi barely halted in time to keep from running into him.

He turned around to look at Atsushi.

Crap! Atsushi thought frantically. I shouldn't have said that. He's irritated at me now…

"Yeah, it's not easy," he said, understanding filling his voice. "I know how it is."

The surprise must have shown on his face because Nakahara chuckled before his face darkened a bit. "Some abilities are hard to control. You aren't the only one with a power that goes berserk."

Then he smiled and started walking again.

"W-Wait!" Atsushi rushed to catch up. "Y-You don't have control over your ability too?"

Nakahara looked irritated for a split second. He flicked Atsushi on the ear; the boy yelped in surprise. "I have great control over my ability, kid." He paused as if considering whether or not he should say anything more. Then, he glanced at Atsushi's face and sighed. "Most of the time… Sometimes in battle, I have to give up control and use a form of my ability called 'corruption."

Corruption…

Something about the way Nakahara said it made everything, every word in their conversation, feel heavier.

"Oh," Atsushi said, not knowing how to respond. He blinked, looking down at the pavement, feeling like this whole conversation got too personal. He had only just met Nakahara after all.

"Here we are," Nakahara said, walking to the entrance of a semi-familiar building and gesturing Atsushi in. At this point Atsushi could navigate to the room where he was supposed to meet Dazai on his own. Rooms and hallways were easier to figure out than buildings and streets.

Nakahara still walked with him inside the building.

"What has Dazai been teaching you so far?"

"Umm… Combat mostly." Atsushi shrugged. "We haven't really gotten to trying to control the tiger yet."

Nakahara scoffed. "Dazai's trying to teach you combat?"

"Yes… Is there something wrong with that?" Atsushi asked, genuinely concerned that there was something wrong with Dazai teaching him how to fight.

"Only that he's absolute crap at hand to hand combat."

Atsushi thought back to the bruises that Dazai had given him during practice, and his complete inability to land a single hit when Dazai told him to retaliate.

"It doesn't seem like that to me," he muttered.

Nakahara snorted. "If you knew more about martial arts, you would agree with me."

Atsushi made an unsure sound, not knowing if he really agreed with Nakahara or not. He couldn't quite find it in himself to say anything against Dazai.

"If you ever get sick of Dazai," Nakahara began. "Which, believe me, will happen before too long-Feel free to track me down, alright?" He offered a smile.

Atsushi smiled back, a more real smile this time. He was so used to giving strained or nervous smiles, but he'd never really known how good it felt to actually just smile.

"I'll keep it in mind," he said, even though he couldn't imagine getting sick of the man who'd brought him into the Port Mafia.

"Well, I hope that doesn't come about any time soon," came a third voice.

Atsushi flinched from surprise as Dazai threw open the closed door to the training room.

Nakahara's easy expression immediately shifted to rage.

"After all," Dazai continued, ignoring Chuuya and putting a hand on Atsushi's head and ruffling his hair. "You are my favorite student." He smiled at Atsushi in a way that was somewhat confusing, as though he was possibly serious or just as possibly being sarcastic.

After the few weeks Atsushi had spent around Dazai, he'd hoped to understand the man a bit better, to know what he meant when he used a certain tone or what he was thinking, but he was still just as in the dark as he'd been when he'd met Dazai for the first time.

"Bandage freak," Nakahara hissed. "Why are you even teaching him combat? You're awful at it!"

Dazai turned to him, boredom darkening his eyes. "Oh, Hatrack, sorry, it took me a moment to see you… You're just not in my line of vision."

There was a long pause where Atsushi feared that Nakahara would just snap. The look on his face was absolutely murderous.

"...Because you're short," Dazai added. "Just in case you didn't get that… your hat has probably eaten most of your remaining brain cells by now." He shrugged.

Instincts took over.

Atsushi slipped into the training room before he heard yelling and crashing from the corridor outside.

"Idiot! I'll rip your head off!"

"Chuuya, I fully believe you would decapitate me if you could reach my head."

Atsushi retreated further into the room, a little scared that a body would come flying through the wall or that something would explode.

It took about ten minutes for the yelling to quiet, and Atsushi assumed that Nakahara had left.

Dazai came in, running a bandaged hand through his hair and sighing. "Sorry you had to meet him, Atsushi-kun. Honestly, talking to Chuuya is a fate that no one deserves."

Atsushi shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "I thought Nakahara-san was nice," he muttered, feeling a little put off by Dazai's intense disdain for Nakahara.

Dazai hummed, a slight patronizing grin painted on his face. "Ah, just wait 'til you get to know him a little more." His expression hardened suddenly. "So, I feel the need to address the fact that you were late today, and later than I was for that matter."

Atsushi swallowed hard, his muscles tensing at Dazai's tone like he expected to get hit. Maybe it was a conditioned response from the orphanage that he still had yet to move past. Dazai hadn't ever really hurt him. Sure, there was training, but those attacks were never malicious. His treatment of Atsushi was very occasionally rough, but Dazai had never more than bruised him.

"I-I apologise, Dazai-san," he managed, talking feeling difficult since his mouth had gone completely dry. "I-My phone was dead, a-and-"

"It's not completely your fault," Dazai cut in. "I told Akutagawa-kun to walk you here. When I called him about it, he said that you should be able to get here on your own." He sighed deeply. "I'll have a talk with him later."

"Oh… Okay. I-"

"But, admittedly, he has a point."

Atsushi's mouth snapped shut.

Oh no…

"You've been here for a few weeks. You really ought to know how things work at this point." Dazai's tone had changed at some point. It was the tone he often used to speak to Akutagawa.

Atsushi's heart thudded against his chest, hard and painful.

His mentor leaned closer to him, the tips of his fingers pushing Atsushi's chin up. Atsushi went rigid at the touch. He looked up at Dazai's uncovered eye, which took on a strange shade of almost scarlet in this light. Like drying blood.

"I'll accept your excuses this time." His eye narrowed a fraction of a centimeter. "Next time though, I won't be so forgiving."

Atsushi could not breathe, and his heart pounded so hard against his sternum that he felt like the bone would break with every beat. His blood ran cold under his skin.

"You understand?"

He nodded numbly, the sound of his pulse still in his ears.

"Okay," Dazai said with a grin on his face, his eye returning to the copper color that Atsushi was used to. "It's good we're on the same page." Dazai retreated.

Air finally flooded Atsushi's lungs, relief making his muscles weak. His legs could hardly support him.

That's why… He thought as he looked up at Dazai. That's why Akutagawa always seems so tense around him. Looking in Dazai's eye, hearing him speak… It was like encountering the devil himself.

"Of course, if you wound up hanging out with Chuuya again, that's way, way worse than any punishment I could come up with."

Atsushi managed a laugh. Whether it was because he was too momentarily frightened to disagree with Dazai or because of the sheer relief of hearing Dazai's normal carefree tone again, he didn't know.

"Let's get started."

So, there it is. Dazai let the facade drop for a minute, scared Atsushi a bit. It's all pretty fun!

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Reviews are much appreicated! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

See you next time!

=D