"Nope! Veto! Rejected! Not going to happen." Moe stomped out in front of All Might and stood proud, one hand on her hips while she pointed at her current and most recent objection. "There is no way I'm going to let those two go head to head against each other."
"Ms. Bakugo, I understand your concern about putting your loved ones in danger but-" All Might started.
She stopped him with a laugh. "In danger? Please, those two are the danger! I want you to think about this for two seconds, All Might."
Moe moved over and ruffled her brother's hair vigorously. Sure, Katsuki squirmed and swore at her but it was just helping her point get cemented into the ground. "Here's what's going to happen if you have this idiot go up against Deku. He's going to ignore everything and find Deku then they're both going to get fucked up. Like, this dumbass can't even do proper teamwork."
"Fuck you, bitch!" Katsuki swore. She was so telling Mom.
Moe moved over and grabbed Deku's head. She might have been a bit more gentle running her fingers through his hair. "And this idiot would fight him and if he's not careful his limbs will explode. And chances are he won't do proper teamwork either when he fights my dumbass little brother."
"Moe," Izuku whined, his blush extra cute. "I'd try."
"So there is no way that having these two go head to head is a good idea in the slightest." Moe let go of both of their heads and walked back over to All Might. "I don't care that you think random teams and random matches ups is a good idea but you need to step up and make corrections when shit gets bad."
"Fuck you bitch, I can use teamwork!" Katsuki shouted. He was taking her bait oh so well.
"Woah, I see why she's the TA, she can yell at All Might."
"Is that even legal?"
"She does have a point."
"Wait, is she really Katsuki's older sister? Huh, I'm starting to see it."
"Is it wrong that watching her yell at All Might turns me on?"
That last one came from Izuku's new, apparently very lesbian friend, Itsuka. Though Moe liked to imagine Izuku nodded along with that.
"I uhh, well, I uhh," All Might took a step back and looked at all the students. He then coughed. "In the field, you never know who you might end up working with so-"
"More often than not you do. That's why we make teams." Moe smiled and raised an eyebrow at All Might. "I guess that doesn't apply to someone like you, but most of us are going to end up working for an agency where we'll build up a connection with other heroes. I'm not saying learning to work with others isn't important, All Might. It is. But you need to make a correction here."
All Might looked like he was torn between wanting to punch something and wanting to run away. "You make a valid point, Moe. Very well, I will leave the teams and the matchmaking up to you." All Might leaned in. "Especially since you know more of their quirks."
Maybe she should see if Nezu would be willing to pay her for this.
"Alright then." Moe turned and made sure that her heel clicked on the ground. "Now we need to figure out what to do with these two teams." Moe licked one of her sharp fangs enjoying that small bit of pain that came with it. Izuku was paired with Itsuka, and Katsuki was paired with Momo. This should be easy but she just needed to work her brother a bit. "Since Katsuki can't work on a team, why don't-"
"Fuck you!" Katsuki stomped his foot. "I can work with any of these pathetic extras!"
"Oh?" Moe smiled and watched as her brother's eyes went wide. "Is that so?"
Hook.
Line.
Sinker.
"Why don't we test that?"
XXXX
"You fell for that hard." Izuku muttered just loud enough for Katsuki to hear.
His now very angry and very explody teammate just turned towards Izuku, seething in what could only be considered the purest form of anger possible. Katsuki didn't so much as swear, growl, or make any real noise as he pointed a finger towards Izuku, only the sound of his teeth grinding against one another broke the silence.
Why did he get caught up in all of this? Katsuki's problem with him was Katsuki's problem, it wasn't his fault. Okay, lately he had been egging him on, but how could he not? It was so easy to set Katsuki off. He did it twice daily by breathing weirdly. So now he was stuck in a metaphorical 'get along' shirt by having to go up against Itsuka and Momo for their class challenge.
"Well at least we're heroes." Izuku muttered looking up at the building. He didn't know much about Momo, but Itsuka seemed to like the girl, but he wasn't sure what kind of like that was. Was it a romantic like or a as friend like, or uhh what other likes were there? Still, Momo had placed high during Aizawa-sensei's test, and her quirk was versatile too. Then there was Itsuka, she had gotten 5th overall during the entrance exam with a good mix of villain and rescue points. And he was fairly certain that both of them were extraordinarily smart.
Like scary smart.
They were going to go in there and it was going to be a trap and then they would get their asses handed to them by some combination of giant hands, glue, nets, and whatever the hell Momo was already making up there. And he was going in with a, he looked at Katsuki again who just growled, a very vicious pomeranian attack dog.
"You know, if we don't win this, your sister is going to say it's proof that you can't work together with others." Izuku didn't bother looking directly at Katsuki, he knew his childhood friend was likely seething at the implication. "And then we'll probably end up having to be paired up again and again just so that we can learn to team up with each other and that if we keep failing it will just get worse and worse and-"
"Deku," Katsuki said in a normal voice. It was so normal it was almost scary. "Shut the fuck up."
And this was why they were going to fail.
"Why? We need to think of a plan and use teamwork, not just to win, but to actually pass. If you rush in there on your own and win then we won't-"
"Shut up!" Katsuki growled his shoulders heaving with a heavy breath. "I fucking know. I know I can run in there and win this whole thing on my own. I know that you could probably pull some bullshit off too because of your fucking quirk, even if your fucking arm explodes."
"Then why are you being such an asshole about this?" Izuku asked, looking at Katsuki.
Katsuki took a deep sigh and seemed to calm himself down. Well as calm as Katsuki could get when he was pissed off to one extreme or another. "Because I'm not sure what I hate more, working with you or having my sister be right about something."
"Ahh, so you're trying to think of a way to not actually work with me and prove Moe wrong?"
Katsuki nodded, he was glaring down at the concrete pathway that separated them from the building. They only had about a minute or two left.
"Well, look at it this way, if we're near each other, your attacks will probably end up hitting me. Maybe even on purpose, we're both short range fighters and you're a lot faster than me, so we'd probably end up falling over each other a lot anyways." Izuku looked up at the building and smiled.
"What's that smile for? Deku!"
"How well do you think you can fly?" Izuku asked half to himself staring up at the open windows of the building.
Katsuki looked up and a wide feral smile blossomed on his face. Honestly, it felt like the kind of smile a predator might give a midnight snack. "Better than you can throw me."
Their plan was one that had been engraved into the history of warfare since the dawn of conflict: Divide and conquer.
The buzzer sounded with all the details still up in the air and they launched their plan with nothing but the start and end worked out. Izuku grabbed Katsuki and used One for All to throw him up above the building where Katsuki would use his explosions to fly in and start fighting.
Izuku rushed in, his legs burning from his first footsteps that shattered the ground beneath him. And his shoes. Those red sneakers his mother had bought him exploded off of his feet and he had to kick the far wall to slow his momentum. Which was probably the dumbest way he could think of to roll his ankle.
Wincing at the pain, Izuku stumbled around one corner after another, using all of his limbs to move as he climbed up the stairs towards the goal.
Partway up he realized that the entire area was covered in a white damp smoke. Likely something that Momo made to dampen Katsuki's explosions. There was no sign of Itsuka either. The signs of battle were all about from the top floor, where Katsuki's swearing could be heard.
Through the mist Izuku could only see a few small lackluster explosions and could only hear Katsuki swearing.
Well, time for more teamwork.
Izuku drew back both of his hands and gathered One for All in them. All Might had changed the weather with a clap. So he could hopefully blow this smoke away! The clap stung. A lot, his hands feeling like they were covered in pins and needles as his finger twisted awkwardly, a bit and his pinky might have been dislocated, but the end result sent the smoke out of the building and Momo tumbling to the side.
With Itsuka busy with a now full strength Katsuki, Izuku charged for the bomb, nearly knocking it over with another burst of speed.
But the end result was clear.
They had won.
And hopefully that meant that they wouldn't have to work together again.
AN: Ara Ara Ara Ara Ara Ara Ara Ara Ara