"Thanks for letting me come over today," Natsuki stated as she set the tray of cutely-decorated cupcakes down on the coffee table. "Once you hear what I want to talk about, you'll probably think I'm crazy, but-"
"Oh, that's nonsense," Monika interrupted, smiling kindly. "Natsuki, you're my friend, and your concerns are as every bit as important to me as my own."
Natsuki shrugged. "It's just kinda weird."
"I'm a weird girl," Monika countered in a jocular manner. "I think I can handle it."
Of the many things that one could call Monika, weird was most certainly not one of them, unless one wanted to say 'weirdly perfect'. Natsuki plopped herself down onto the genuine leather couch that was the epicenter of the entertainment room in Monika's house. Natsuki, who had always lived just marginally over the poverty line, never ceased to be stupefied by the frivolity of rich families, and Monika was no exception. Her father was a successful investment banker, and her mother earned an equally hefty income as a doctor. Success ran in the family, which made Natsuki even more self-conscious of the failure that ran in hers.
But though she was a rich, smart, athletic, and altogether flawless woman, Monika never failed to keep her ego in check. When she said she was there for her friends, she meant it. Of course, bringing sweets into the mix probably made the deal more tantalizing, but Natsuki suspected that it was the least she could do for such a supportive friend.
Monika snatched one of the cupcakes, bit into it, and washed it down with heavy dose of creamy, sugary coffee. "So, what's on your mind, anyway? Grades? Poetry? Don't forget that we have that short story contest for the club next Thursday-"
"I wanna get laid."
Monika nearly dropped her coffee cup. Her eyes widened.
"Could you repeat that?"
"You heard what I said," Natsuki stated flatly.
"I did, but I, well, even from you, I didn't expect to hear something so blunt-"
Natsuki sighed. "Yeah, you have a point. Monika, I have a problem, and I don't know if it's my fault or MC's."
"Is the relationship not going so well?" Monika inquired, taking another gulp of coffee. "I thought you were crazy about him."
Natsuki allowed the ghost of a smile to cross her face. "I am. Monika, he's been there for me in ways that nobody else has, not even you. I never thought I could meet someone so larger than life."
"Awww," Monika cooed. "Natsuki's in looooovveeee."
It was playful, friendly teasing; Natsuki knew that. Nevertheless, the childlike manner in which Monika delivered it earned her a mild glare. "S-shut up."
Monika finished the last of her coffee in one fell swoop. She was still smiling, unfazed by Natsuki's angry demand. "There's no need to get upset, being in love is a wonderful thing. But if you're in a loving relationship, why is your sex life having trouble getting off the ground?"
"Why do you think?" Natsuki questioned rhetorically as she snatched a cupcake. "Monika, I love him, but he is a mystery I still just don't understand. I've never seen someone so fundamentally bad at understanding social cues. He was like that when I tried to drop hints that I had a crush on him, remember?"
Monika raised and lowered her eyebrows, grinning. "Oh, I seem to remember that a certain someone also had trouble spitting out their own feelings, too. You couldn't even tell him to his face; you got all red and started stuttering. Watching you write that love note to him in the club was adorable."
"That's not the point," Natsuki remarked stubbornly. "Monika, I've tried so hard to get him to plow me, but he doesn't seem to take the hint. I've gotten naked around him countless times, flirting with him all the while, and he still doesn't seem to get the hint! How far do I gotta spread my legs before he finally decides to fuck!?"
Monika chuckled awkwardly. "Honestly, when you said you wanted to talk, I didn't expect you to mean something like this."
Natsuki bit into her cupcake. "Well, I don't know who else to turn to. Sayori is just as clueless as he is, and I have no clue if Yuri would laugh at me or be scared shitless of me for bringing up something so personal."
Monika eyes instinctively darted away from Natsuki. "Well, I know for certain that Yuri wouldn't be much help in this situation even if she genuinely wanted to give you good advice."
Natsuki's head bobbed up and down. "I know, right? She has virgin written all over her!"
"That's not exactly what I meant, but close enough," Monika muttered under her breath. Clearing her throat, she added, "Anyway, aren't you a virgin, as well?"
"Well, I mean, I'm trying."
"Well then, let's get down the bottom of this. If you're running around buck naked trying to seduce him, why do you think it isn't working?"
"Because like I said before, he's not taking any of my hints!" Natsuki exclaimed while rubbing her temples. "To call him socially oblivious is quite possibly the understatement of the decade."
"But you can work around that, right?" Monika probed. "Why not tell him that you want to take your relationship to that next level?"
Natsuki sputtered as she searched for some response. Finally, it came to her. "Monika, I just can't do that. I want him to come to the conclusion on his own. I want him to be the one interested in me," she emphatically argued. Then, after glancing around the room as if searching for a potential spy, she added, "Besides, isn't it a little, you know, slutty? For a girl to be the one to ask, right?"
The claim alone caused Monika to burst into a fit of laughter so intense that her coffee mug fell from her grip. Luckily, it landed safely on the couch.
Natsuki felt a pang of regret in her chest upon seeing Monika's reaction. Did she say something so foolish that even a supportive friend like Monika couldn't take it seriously? After all, in spite of all the times that she had been there for Natsuki, Monika was not immune to having a laugh at her expense if the farting incident was anything to go by.
"Monika, this is serious!" Natsuki whined, though she scowled down at her hysterical friend. "It's slutty, isn't it?"
Finally, Monika recovered enough to formulate something resembling a counterpoint. Taking Natsuki's hand in hers, Monika stared deeply into her in the same way that a police interrogator might do to a captured suspect. "Natsuki, you are a virgin. You are a virgin in a relationship that continues to go on strong for 7 months and counting. You are a virgin in a relationship with a man that I have every reason to believe cherishes you not as some mere prize for the bedroom, but as dear friend and soulmate. What on Earth gives you the idea that it's slutty to tell him what you want?"
"Well, Papa always said that-"
"Forget what your Papa says," Monika interrupted gently. "You don't live under his roof anymore, and for good reason. It's not slutty to-"
"I can't do it, Monika!" Natsuki exclaimed forcefully. "I can't just tell him! I'll look like a fool!"
Monika sighed. Debate club had taught her how to deal with stubborn refusal on a point: there was always another way if you were intellectually creative enough. "Well, perhaps he's waiting for a special moment. Have you tried arranging for your first time to be somewhere special? I've heard some couples like to go somewhere secluded to, uh, make love."
Natsuki rubbed her chin in thought. "Well, I suppose I haven't. To be honest, I kinda didn't consider that. It's a good idea, though."
"Just make it romantic," Monika offered. "MC seems like the kind of guy who'd want things to be special, doesn't he? You'd probably know more about what he wants than I do, but from my interactions with him, I could see it being the case."
"You have a good point," Natsuki admitted. At last, she nodded. "Alright, Monika. What if I go ahead and give that a shot?"
Monika shrugged. "Well, I mean, it can't hurt to try."
"Then I'll try it," Natsuki declared with a sudden surge of resolve, as if it had been an idea she had all along. "By this time next week, Monika, I'll be a changed woman. You'll see!"
She rose from her chair and started to march out of the room. Monika cocked her head in considerable bewilderment. "So. . . Are you just leaving, then?"
Natsuki jumped, realizing that she may need to rein in her excitement a tad bit. She whipped around and awkwardy scratched the back of her neck. "Uhhh, if that's alright with you, I suppose. Sorry for just springing this on you today, but I really needed your advice on this."
Monika shook her head and smiled. "Like I said before, think nothing of it. I'm always happy to help a friend in need. Or, in this case, a friend in need of seed."
That got a laugh out of Natsuki. "Thanks for everything, Monika," she stated with a sincere air of gratitude. "You're a good friend, you know that?"
"Anytime, Natsuki," Monika offered. She rose from the couch, crossed the room, and pulled Natsuki into a friendly hug. She didn't resist, which was a testament to the amount of faith she had in her. After releasing Natsuki, she gestured to the cupcakes. "Don't forget to take those home."
Natsuki shook her head. "Nah, you keep 'em. You've earned them, after all."
Monika chuckled. "If eating all these cupcakes is my mission, then it's a sacrifice I'll happily make," she joked. As soon as she said that, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She had a feeling that she might know who that was, but she refused to check it in the presence of company. "Anyway, if that's all you got for me, I should probably get started on my work for the short story contest. Tales don't right themselves, after all."
Natsuki nodded. "Right. See you tomorrow, Monika. Take care!"
With that, Natsuki walked out of the room, perhaps with just a bit more pep in her step as she did so. Half a minute later, Monika heard the front door open and close. She creeped over to the window to see Natsuki heading down the sidewalk. Once she was absolutely certain that her company was gone, she pulled out her phone. Sure enough, on her lock screen, there was the report of one unread message from Yuri. Yuri's name had a purple heart emoji next to it.
"Thinking of you," it read simply, followed by an attachment. Monika unlocked her phone to discover an image of very naked Yuri lying against the wall of her bedroom, taken from the torso up. Her violet eyes harbored feelings that she never expressed at any other time. The hand that wasn't holding the phone was busy caressing her left nipple.
Monika smile was as equally as longing as Yuri's expression.
"'She has virgin written all over her,'" Monika repeated Natsuki's quote. "What you don't know won't hurt you."