It had been completely coincidental to find Dorian amongst the whores, laughing and happily nosing against an elfen male's neck. At least the boy was still dressed, even with his hand wandering over the elf's bare shoulder and up his neck.

Alexius wasn't sure if he was to laugh or cry at the sight, but it proved that his hunch had been correct.

Dorian's reputation was well known and Halward had often spoken to Alexius about the issues he had with his son. Alexius was a good friend of the Pavus family and was happy to listen to his friend and colleague, but in this instance he was certain that Halward was wrong about his own son.

To him it was clear that Dorian was a boy well on his way to self-destruction: Alexius had seen it before with many young boys and girls that were pressured by their parents.

So to find Dorian there, clearly drunk out of his skull and with an elfen man on his lap, was not unsurprising in itself, but it was a miracle.

A boy such as Dorian could easily have gotten in more severe trouble because of his status and inexperience. Slavers or kidnappers could easily have taken him while in the state he was in, holding him for ransom or even sell him as a slave to a rivalling family, simply to humiliate the Pavus family further.

For those reasons, Alexius was glad that he had found the boy friend and it was with that in mind that he walked over to Dorian. "I see that you have found yourself something to amuse yourself with."

Dorian's head turned lazily and Alexius could all but see the wheels turning as the boy tried to place him. As soon as it clicked into place, the grin was back and Dorian lifted his tankard up in the air.

"Magister, good ser," he slurred, almost spilling the ale onto Alexius' robe. "I cannot say I am surprised to see you here. I've seen quite a few Magisters these last days, doing things they are not supposed to do. Quite amusing!"

"I am sure you have," Alexius replied, fixing the elf a look before jerking his head to the side, signalizing for the elf to get off Dorian's lap.

The elf, to his credit, took it with grace, sliding off Dorian's lap with a caress to the boy's cheek.

"You know where to find me," he purred as he left, flashing Dorian a smile as he headed off. "Should you be allowed to pursuit me."

Dorian looked after the elf, almost falling off his chair as he tried to keep the man in his sight for as long as possible before pouting, fixing his eyes on Alexius instead.

"I was having fun with him, you know."

"I am sure you were, Dorian, but fun is over for now," Alexius replied, gesturing for Dorian to come with him.

Dorian didn't budge however. Instead he leaned forward, tilting his head enough to caress his cheek against Alexius' outstretched hand. "Are you certain," he whispered, looking up at Alexius with half-closed eyes and an attempt at a sultry smile on his lips.

"Fun is never over, if one makes it so. Maybe we can have fun together. You, me and him?"

'Ah,' Alexius thought, eyebrow raised at Dorian's behaviour. 'So that's what he has learned these last days.'

That in itself was worrisome and it made Alexius' even more glad that he found Dorian before someone else did.

"He is a sweet man," Dorian continued, smirking as he let his hand slide into Alexius', squeezing it. "I am sure he wouldn't mind another powerful mage in his bed, no? What a story he could tell to the others, bedding two powerful men at once."

"Something I am certain he has done many a times," Alexius laughed, letting his fingers curl around Dorian's hand tightly and using the opportunity to yank the boy onto his feet.

Dorian let out a rather undignified yelp, crashing into Alexius' body and it was only Alexius' other arm, coming to the boy's aid around his waist that prevented Dorian from falling over.

"Today he will not have that pleasure though. You and I are leaving."

"I have already paid him!" Dorian protested, trying to squirm away from Alexius' grasp, but in his inhibited state the boy could barely stand, Alexius found.

"Then he will have a very easy night tonight, Dorian. You should be proud of yourself and consider it a small kindness."

Dorian let out a scoff, still trying to twist away from Alexius, but the man simply had too good of a grip on him. "And what good would kindness do me, hmm?" he sneered as Alexius started tugging him away from his seat and towards the exit.

"I certainly do not feel better for it. If anything, I feel rather frustrated."

"Trust me when I say you will feel a lot more in the morning if you had actually slept with the elf. Besides, if you think about it in a more clear state of mind tomorrow, I am sure you will understand why, Dorian," Alexius merely said as he all but dragged Dorian out of the brothel and towards the main street of the slum. It was probably not the most dignified of exits, but right now Alexius did not care much about dignity. He just wanted Dorian safe.

"You do know I will have to notify your father that I have found you. You created quite the stir when you ran away from the Chantry."

"Well, they shouldn't have brought me to the Chantry in the first place," Dorian grumbled, having given up on trying to break free and just sullenly followed the Magister.

"I was quite clear that I did not wish to go."

"That might be so, but running away was not the way to go."

"'twas the only damn choice I had," Dorian grumbled while Alexius let out a sigh, shaking his head as he guided the boy to his carriage. Thankfully it was still where he had left it, the rider holding onto the leash of the carriage's horses tightly.

"We will leave now," Alexius called up while opening the door for Dorian, still holding onto him with his other.

"After you, young Pavus."

"I assume I will have no say in this either," Dorian said, fixing Alexius a rather stubborn and angry stare, but the fact that he was still struggling to focus took some of the heat out of it.

"In this matter, no, but only because I wish to see you back to safety."

"If you take me home, I will be anything but safe," Dorian replied as he climbed into the carriage, slumping down onto a seat with his back against the carriage wall.

"You'd be better off leaving me with the whores then."

"You will not be going anywhere until you have gotten a good night's sleep," Alexius answered as he followed Dorian into the carriage.

"I have a room at a tavern within the Gilded Quarter, where you can sleep off that fog of yours. Perhaps then you can give me a proper glare without squinting."

Dorian wrinkled his nose and fixed Alexius another glare, but the sudden increased redness on the boy's cheeks were not from the alcohol alone.

Alexius chuckled softly while rapping his knuckles against the back of the carriage, signalizing for the driver to take off. "Take us to the Gilded Quarter, good ser. Take it easy on the turns so young master Pavus won't be sick in here."

"As you wish, Magister Alexius," the driver replied.

Alexius could hear the snap of the whip and the sharp "Yiah!" from the driver before the carriage rocketed into motion, making Dorian jerk forward suddenly before he slumped back down against the wall, paling ever so slightly from the motions.

"If you need to throw up, please speak up so we can open the window here. I'd rather not have the carriage smell of vomit."

"Maker forbid," Dorian mumbled, then blinked his eyes in surprise as Alexius leaned forward, holding a leather-skin in his hand.

"Drink. It will make you feel better."

The sceptical look that replaced the surprised one on Dorian's face was enough to make Alexius laugh, the older man unable to keep the smile from his lips.

"It is just water, young Pavus. Nothing more, nothing else. Sometimes, the simple things are the best remedies."

Dorian didn't respond, but after a moment of hesitation, he took the water-skin from Alexius, bringing the tip to his lips before drinking. One sip turned into another, longer one until the young man greedily drank from the skin as if he was dying of thirst. He drank half the content before removing his mouth from the tip, breathing out hard before letting out a burp.

"... Pardon me."

Alexius chuckled and smiled, watching Dorian as the young man seemed to sober up somewhat from the water. "Glad to see that you have not completely forgotten your manners under all that bluster."

Dorian was about to say something, Alexius could tell, but instead the young boy snapped his mouth shut with an auditable clack as his teeth met one another, his hand holding the water-skin towards the older man.

"We won't be long," Alexius merely said as he took the water-skin, placing it into a basket that was resting on the floor.

"The Gilded Quarter isn't far by horse."

"I am sure it is not," Dorian mumbled, resting his head against the side-wall of the carriage, rubbing his hand over his nose.

His cheeks were still pink from the drinks and probably the embarrassment, but his eyes were not as glassy anymore, making Alexius think that the scene in the whorehouse has been fuelled by something else than just alcohol.

Alcohol had probably played a big part, that much was clear, but Alexius suspected there was more too it.

"You are acting as if I am going to toss you into the gallows."

"Are you not?" Dorian asked, though he didn't look at the older man.

"You may be showing me kindness or mercy by letting me sleep in peace for a night, but the end-result is me being shipped back to my father, no? That, or sending me back to the Order. Either way, I am sure I will be flogged into repentance, one way or the other."

"I am sure you won't be flogged, young Dorian," Alexius said, though he didn't find the situation as amusing anymore. Not that it had been earlier either, but the young man's bravado and courage had lured a chuckle out of him.

"A stern talking to, certainly and some cuts of privileges, but a bright man such as yourself would be able to earn those back in a heart-beat."

"So they tell me," Dorian replied, but he didn't elaborate. Instead he fell silent again, watching the dark city outside as the carriage took them to the Gilded Quarter.

Alexius took the opportunity to study the young man, taking in his posture, his clothes, everything. He compared the boy to his own son, Felix, comparing the attitude and the way he handled himself and what he found was simply heart-breaking.

The young boy in front of him did not have a shred of self-confidence.

He had bravado, courage, he had the intellect and the attitude, but Alexius could see the cracks in what had been a finely crafted illusion.

Everything about him; his clothes, his attitude, his words, it was all weapons. It was all a lie.

Dorian Pavus could talk the talk and he was able to lie so well that he probably believed his own lies, but underneath the bravado was a boy that knew the truth.

"Dorian," Alexius said after a few minutes of sitting in silence, deciding that he wanted to know more about what was going on inside this boy's head.

"Why did you decide to go to the whorehouse tonight?"

"Why not?"

"Surely you had a reason," Alexius pried, leaning a little forward as he carefully watched for any reactions from Dorian.

Dorian glanced over at Alexius, but the movement was no more than the movement of his eyes. His head remained leaned against the wooden surface of the carriage along with his body. He didn't say anything for a minute before he lifted his shoulders in a small shrug.

"I just felt like it. I was there, it looked fun, so I went inside."

"Was that the only reason?"

"Do I need any other reasons?"

Alexius gave a small smile. "I suppose not," he hummed before letting silence fall in the carriage, letting the driver take them to the Inn.

Once the carriage stopped, Dorian waited for Alexius to get out before following, arms hanging stiffly down as he walked into the Inn without a word. Thankfully there was no need to arrange for a room as Alexius had already taken care of that, even having the foresight to get a room with two beds.

It was late in the night now and the Inn was silent, save from the footsteps created by the two mages as they walked inside. This was not like the Inns Dorian had stayed in; silence was required here after a certain hour.

The two of them passed the Inn's counter and headed down a long hallway until Alexius stopped them in front of a locked door. He fished up a key from his pouch and as soon as the door was unlocked, Alexius gestured for Dorian to go inside.

"I'd ask if you wanted something to eat," he said as he followed, closing and locking the door behind him. "But I'm afraid there's nothing served now. I can arrange for fruit or something simple, if you want."

"I am fine," Dorian said quietly, no obvious trace of the boy's inhibited state remaining in the way he moved or spoke.

"Are you certain?"

Dorian nodded and slowly removed the head-band from around his head, fingers stroking over the golden circles that decorated the black cloth. The half-long black hair was messy, the long strands slowly escaping from the loosening leather string that was used to keep it in its place.

Alexius lowered the hood from his head before slowly loosening up the front of the robe so he could remove it for the night. While doing so he watched Dorian, who was standing with his back to the older man, hands still holding onto the head-band, watching either it or the air; Alexius wasn't sure, but he could tell that the boy was deep in thought.

"... Magister Alexius?"

"Yes, Dorian?"

Dorian bit his bottom lip, hesitating some before continuing to speak. "... What will happen to me now?"

"In truth? I do not know," Alexius replied, removing his robe and carefully folding it up, placing it on a chair that was next to his bed, leaving him in a soft cotton tunic and silken pants as well as his boots.

"But if I am to guess, your father will have a word with you. Rather, several words. You will most likely be punished in a similar fashion as you have in the past before your father will start a new search to continue your education."

"I see."

"You do not sound relieved."

"Should I be?"

Alexius raised an eyebrow, folding his arms over his chest as he looked at Dorian's back. "I think you should, young Pavus. You were lucky tonight."

Dorian didn't answer and instead let the head-band fall from his hand, watching as it landed onto the bed. He stared at it, still fully clothed before he slowly turned his head. The grey eyes were moist, but Dorian was not crying. Not yet.

"... You should have left me there."

"Why?

"Because... I do not want to go home."

"Dorian," Alexius started, taking a step forward to place a hand on Dorian's shoulder. Instead the boy flinched, immediately halting Alexius in his steps.

"Tell me what is on your mind," the older mage said instead, giving Dorian his space.

"Your parents are worried about you. The second they heard you were gone, they arranged for a search. When they hear that you are alive and well-"

"If they cared so much, they shouldn't have sent me to the Order," Dorian suddenly yelled, hands curled into fists.

"I never wanted to go! But they never listen!" The young man's voice cracked, the last sentence coming out broken as Dorian's voice had started to tremble.

"They don't care about my well-being, they just want me home so they can continue with their precious plans," he continued, the words now whispered and even though there were several feet between them, Alexius could see that Dorian was shaking.

"Dorian," the older mage started again, his voice calm and soothing.

"Take a deep breath. That's it," he coaxed as Dorian did as instructed, nodding his head with each breath the boy took. "There we go," he murmured, holding his hands up to show that he was listening.

"I want to understand the reason for this, young Pavus. Please... Talk to me."

"Why? Will you understand more than my parents? Will you truly listen to me?" Dorian whispered, voice still shaking.

"Yes, I will," Alexius murmured softly. "I am here now, yes? I am not going anywhere. I am right here, willing to listen to anything you want to tell me."

Alexius could almost see it as Dorian took in the words and started picking them apart, poking at every syllable, every letter, trying to find an ulterior motive, but finding nothing.

He was quiet, watching as Dorian contemplated what to do, almost holding his breath in fear of spooking him.

"... I don't know what to say," Dorian eventually whispered, sounding so small and lost that Alexius felt his heart ache for him.

It was so clear that Dorian had so much he -wanted- to say, but lacked the ability to get the words out.

"How about we just start somewhere," Alexius suggested while sitting down onto his bed, eyes never leaving Dorian. "And we see where that ends up."

Dorian hesitated before nodding, moving to sit down on his own bed, eyes glued to the floor.

"We can start with something obvious. Like why you ran away from the Order and the Chantry. Surely it wasn't that bad?"

"It was to me," Dorian whispered, fingers gripping and tugging at the fine fabric that covered the bed.

"It was just another gilded cage where nobody listened to a single word anyone said. My words didn't matter, they just wanted me to shut up and do as I was told."

"Institutions do work that way, Dorian," Alexius murmured. "It is a way to teach respect to those who know more than yourself."

"I know that," Dorian spat, gripping his fingers harder into the fabric, gripping almost hard enough to tear it.

"I was a good student once. I listened to my teachers. Respected them. I gave them what they wanted. But then they stopped listening to -me-."

"Who did?"

"Everybody. Everybody stopped listening and just-"

The young man hesitated, fidgeting as he struggled to find his own words before finally continuing. "-they just started ordering me around instead. They told me that I was to do this or that and there was no room for discussion. No room for error."

Alexius frowned some, trying to understand what Dorian was saying. "I am not sure I understand what you mean, Dorian," he murmured. "As a student, you are supposed to do as you are told. Did you feel that you were too important to listen to them?"

"That is not what I mean."

"Then what do you mean, Dorian? Are you speaking about your tutors or something else?"

Dorian let out a small snort and shook his head. "I wish I was speaking about my tutors and the Circle. At least then there would be a reason to follow their wishes. I am supposed to learn, after all, like you said. But no, I do not mean my tutors or the Circles, Magister Alexius. I mean in my life."

"Your life?"

Dorian nodded before holding his hand out, letting a small ball of fire appear in his palm, letting it grow until it was the size of a closed fist. "This," he said as he looked up at Alexius. "Is what my parents want. And it is the only thing they want."

"Your magic," Alexius asked.

Dorian nodded again before clamping his fingers around the fireball, snuffing the flames out until nothing remained. "My magic," he echoed. "I learned fast that it doesn't matter what I do as long as I do what they want me to do. I learned that my parents do not want me. They want what I am."

"Dorian-" Alexius started, only to be interrupted as Dorian suddenly stood up from the bed.

"Don't. Don't defend them because you know it is true! Do you honestly think they would have had such high expectations of me if I had been born without magical talent? Do you think they would have said I would become the next Archon if I could not summon fire out of thin air? No. No, they would have claimed their child had died in a tragic accident and tossed me into the nearest river. Or an orphanage, if they felt generous enough. They do not love me, they love my magic. My talent. They love what they want me to become."

The words where harsh and raw with emotions, and Alexius could see that this was not something Dorian simply said.

This was something Dorian believed with his entire being.

"My reasons for running away has been the same as when I have been sent home from other Circles or tutors," Dorian continued as he started pacing the room, arms wrapped around himself as he tried to calm down without success. The dam had been breached now and every emotion, every thought Dorian had on the subject was flooding out.

"Nobody listened to me. Nobody ever asked me even once what I want in life. My path has been made painfully clear to me. I am to do this and that and get married and fuck my wife enough times to pump out a child or five before I take my seat in the Magisterium as a Magister, then as Archon. That is my path, my destiny. Not once have they asked what -I- want to do. They do not -care- what I want to do. They do not care that I -don't- what that life. I am not even sure I want to be a mage!"

"Then what do you want, Dorian," Alexius asked softly, carefully.

Dorian stopped his pacing, hesitating some before his shoulders slumped. "... I don't know. Because what I want has never been an option. Nothing about me has mattered. Not what I want or how I feel. I am just to shut up and do as I am told, like it or not."

He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut hard. "Nobody has ever asked me how I am doing," he whispered slowly. "Or even why. They demand to know why. Why am I like this, why am I doing it, why am I ruining things. But nobody has ever asked me "Dorian, why did it come to this?" or "Why did you do that?" for my sake. Even if they have, they never let me speak. They always said "I do not want to hear your excuses" or something similar."

Alexius just listened in silence as Dorian spoke, letting the boy actually find his voice for once without anyone interrupted him.

It all made sense now. The way Dorian acted, the way he spoke. The careless way he carried himself.

The boy was obviously starved for positive affection and attention, and had figured that negative attention was better than no attention at all. At least then, people paid attention to him outside the obvious expectations they had of him.

After the outburst of emotions, Dorian had retracted back into himself, giving Alexius one last look before heading to the bed, letting himself fall onto it without even undressing. The boy made sure that his back was to Alexius and the Magister was willing to bet that he was feeling embarrassed and vulnerable. It was understandable, at least to Alexius, that the boy would feel that way now.

It did not take long before the tension drained ever so slightly from Dorian's shoulders as he fell asleep, exhausted from the many events of the night, though even as the boy slept, Alexius could see that the boy was tense.

He was curled up in an almost foetal position, knees pulled up and arms still wrapped around himself.

'Oh, Halward, you have truly failed on this,' he thought to himself, shaking his head some as he watched the boy sleep.

Dorian was sixteen years of age, almost a man, and yet Alexius could see the vulnerable child that was still hiding inside of him.

A child that was hurting and wanting affection, but was too afraid to reach out and ask for it.

Maybe it was because Alexius had a son of his own that he was able to see just how much the Pavus-family had failed their own son by trying to shape him into something that the boy wasn't even ready to understand. They had not even given Dorian the chance to find himself first, leaving the young man a confused mess that was clearly trying to destroy himself using any means possible.

As he watched the sleeping boy, Alexius thought about what he could do for him and as he thought, an idea came to mind.

Maybe it was too late as it was, but Alexius would never forgive himself if he did not make the attempt.

As quiet as he could, he sat down by the table that was in the room and started working on a letter to Dorian's father.

It was a long shot and even if Halward agreed, it was not a given that Dorian himself would agree to it, but that was a battle Alexius was willing to face.

Because if it was one thing Dorian deserved in life, it was a chance.

A chance that Alexius was more than willing to offer to the boy.

"I am indeed the one who found your son with the whores, my friend.

Ask me not what I was doing there, and I shall tell you no lies.

The boy had enough cheek, even in his inebriated state, to invite me to join him. It made me laugh, so I dragged him back to the Gilded Quarter rather than simply calling the templars. Fortunate that I did, since once Dorian sobered up in the carriage, we had an interesting chat.

He's rather despondent over the life's path you've charted for him -if I may frankly- and thus, I think a part of him sabotages all efforts to keep him on the straight and narrow, either to spite you or to punish himself.

I cannot say.

Regardless, he has spirit, and his tutors claims he has almost as much talent as he believes.

With your permission, I'd like to take him under my wing and see what can be done to cultivate it.

No matter what he feels, it would be a pity for such a mage to go to waste.

Our Imperium needs better.

Gereon Alexius"