I do not own Naruto. Enjoy~
First Person- Zoe
Once I got home, I quickly parked my car and rushed up the stairs.
During the drive home, Hidan bitched and complained about being hungry the whole time. Pein twitched the whole time, especially when Hidan got louder after Kakuzu punched him in the back of the head. Sasori looked murderous, hissing threats underneath of his breath the entire car ride.
Pein was totally going to kick his ass.
I waltzed into the kitchen, grabbing two large pans and putting them on the stove. I heard my group walk in before watching them walk into the kitchen. Pein still looked livid, but Hidan was quiet while Sasori and Kakuzu smirked.
"If you'd like to, you can use the back yard for training," I offered, pulling two large packages of hamburger out of the fridge.
Pein cocked an eyebrow at me, "Are you sure? We wouldn't want your neighbours noticing us."
I nodded, "The house next door is unoccupied. That's why there's a sign in front of it with some womans name and phone number on it," I explained, holding up my cell phone. "Phones are how we communicate, though I guess you might've caught on to that when you were kittens."
Sasori shook his head, staring at the phone in my hands, "We had noticed you used them, but we didn't know exactly what for." Kakuzu nodded in agreement.
Deidara, Beth, Onyxcia, Itachi and Kisame all walked in the room, hearing the conversation.
"Anyway," I continued, unpackaging the meat, "Just don't do anything crazy. I doubt anyone will notice a few people outside sparring."
"Very well," Pein dipped his head at me. "Hidan, I would like to spar with you."
Hidan paled before Pein strode over to the sliding glass door that opened into a literal field surrounded by trees. We lived in the countryside, not the city, so our backyard was pretty secluded.
Kakuzu snorted, "Should've been quiet when he warned you in the car."
"Fuck you Kakuzu!" Hidan roared, whipping around to look at the stitched man.
"Danna, will you spar with me, un?" Deidara wondered, turning to the redhead. The addressed man nodded, walking towards the door after Pein, everyone following close behind.
Onyxcia gasped, "This is gonna be so cool."
Beth grinned, nodding as she agreed. The two girls followed closely behind, deciding to watch as I began preparing the tacos.
"Zoe-chan is cooking for us?" Tobi gasped, skipping over to me and looming over my shoulder to look at the sizzling meat. The tall man wrapped his arms around me in a thankful hug, "Thank you so much, Zoe-chan!"
I grinned, "You're very welcome, Tobi."
I turned to see Konan and Zetsu also standing in the kitchen.
"Everyone is outside training," I informed her as Tobi released me and returned to Zetsu's side.
"Pein told us," Konan nodded, a small smile on her lips. I cocked my head to the side and she held up her ring.
"It's so cool!" I gasped, rushing to her side. I had her hand in mine in a matter of seconds, inspecting the ring as she giggled.
"You're so weird," Zetsu's black half growled. "No she's not! She's a freak."
"Thank you, Zetsu," I snorted, turning to him.
"It wasn't a compliment. Oh, shut up. You're so rude," He argued, phasing through the door as he did so. I gawked, watching him.
"It's pretty cool to see it in person," I admitted, returning to my cooking.
"It must," Konan agreed sweetly. Her and Tobi followed the others outside, preparing to spar.
Deidara and Sasori were pretty evenly matched. Neither of the artists strong points were hand-to-hand combat, but I wouldn't be able to tell that if I didn't know. Their kicks and punches were fast, each dodging amazingly as well.
Kakuzu and Kisame were fighting, as well. Both large men were very talented at what they were doing, each taking hits and delivering them every time I blinked. Kakuzu looked indifferent, but Kisame had a large grin on his face as usual.
Tobi and Zetsu had also paired up, though I could hear Tobi begging Zetsu not to hurt him because he was a good boy.
Itachi and Konan were both using jutsu, to my surprise. They followed my wishes and kept it to a minimum, but it was awesome. Konan sent some of her paper flying at Itachi, but he wove a few signs quickly and dispersed them with a small fireball.
The last pair was hilarious to watch. Hidan was getting his ass beat by Pein, continuously attempting to rush his leader but was sent flying backwards into a tree by the gingers almighty push. It was awesome, though I could hear Hidan cussing loudly each time he was thrown away.
There's a reason Pein was the leader.
Onyxcia was loudly cheering Pein on every time Hidan flew backwards, clearly pissing the zealot off even more than he already was.
Beth just sat there, chewing her nails nervously as she watched everyone with concern written on her face.
She was too good for us.
I watched as Hidan stormed towards Onyxcia, cussing loudly as he approached her but was quickly thrown to the ground by Sasori who was standing nearby. The puppet masters foot was pressing his head into the ground, a bored look on his face as Deidara laughed loudly along with Onyxcia.
Onyxcia found a bottle of water, hurling it at Hidan's head, likely just to piss him off more. She had unscrewed the cap a little bit, causing the water to splash all over his head as she laughed hysterically, leaning on Deidara to support her as he also shook with laughter.
I quickly finished preparing all of the food before pulling the sliding door open. "Supper's ready," I called, gaining everyone's attention. Before I even got the chance to turn, I was over Hidan's shoulder as he grabbed a plate.
"Hidan!" I hissed loudly, dangling over the taller mans shoulder. I watched as everyone else walked in as well, a few chuckling or laughing at my predicament.
"What the fuck did you make?" He questioned. I knew it wasn't intentionally rude and that he was just confused, so I ignored it.
"Tacos," I said. "If you let me down I can show you how to make them."
He complied quickly, placing me down on my feet in front of him while everyone stood close by, watching Beth and Onyxcia prepare their tacos.
"You take the tortilla," I said, holding one up for everyone to see. For a second, I felt like I was talking to a bunch of children. "And you put sour cream, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes and whatever else you like on it with the meat."
They all understood quickly, everyone preparing their food and sitting around our giant table we had in our large kitchen.
"Thanks for the food, yeah!" Deidara said happily before biting into one of his three tacos. I mentally thanked myself for making so much meat.
"You're welcome," I smiled, grabbing my food before walking over and joining them.
"Zoe's the best cook in this house," Onyxcia complimented, her mouth full. Beth sighed, grabbing a napkin and shoving it in her face.
"I'd say," Kisame grinned. "It's fantastic," he said as he rumpled my hair. I sat between him and Sasori, taking note that the puppeteer was eating well.
"Thank you," I smiled, watching everyone scarf down their food. "Onyxcia can cook, she just saves it for holidays."
Beth blushed, looking up to me, "I want to learn how to cook but every time I try something goes wrong."
Onyxcia sat up, "Like that time you put two cups of salt in muffins rather than two tablespoons?"
Beth huffed out, crossing her arms and glaring to the side while Kisame, Onyxcia, Beth and Deidara laughed loudly. The rest of us settled for just letting out a small laugh at it.
"They did smell amazing," I admitted, sipping on my water. "But as soon as I took a bite I felt sick."
"How do you even do that?" Kakuzu snorted, picking up his plate and mine before placing them in the dishwasher.
"Oi!" Hidan yelled, holding his plate up with a full mouth of food. "Come get mine too, asshole."
Kakuzu walked past him, slapping him across the head before sitting back down. "I grabbed Zoe's because she cooked for us. The rest of you can take care of yourselves."
"So considerate," Kisame snickered.
"He isn't wrong," Itachi cut in, having just finished his food as well. "The least we could do is clean up for her."
"How sweet," I said with a smirk. "But, I feel like I'll be cleaning up after Deidara and Hidan a lot."
"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" Hidan demanded, his eyes narrowed at me. Deidara looked up with a mouth full of food and a messy face as he tilted his head to the side as he heard his name.
"Stop being so hostile," Konan hissed, shutting him up immediately. Everyone turned to her, showing her respect. "These girls are housing us. Stop threatening them."
Hidan scoffed and made to retort but stopped quickly as he saw the glare Pein sent towards him.
After everything was cleaned up, we all found ourselves lazing around the living room. I sat comfortably on the large leather couch, my short legs lying on Sasori's lap. Kakuzu sat next to Sasori, lazily flipping through a book.
Hidan was in my recliner, the remote in his hand as he curiously flicked through the channels. On the other couch, Beth sat in the middle of Itachi and Deidara, everyone on that couch fixated on the TV, each of them calling out if they wanted to watch something when he passed it.
Kisame sat on the ground in front of me, curiously using my phone that I had taught him how to use.
He even put his fingerprint in it.
I grinned as I glanced behind the couch seeing Nyx on her hands and knees, crawling towards the other large couch. I cocked an eyebrow but said nothing, deciding to just watch what might happen.
"Sneak attack!" She shrieked, throwing herself against Itachi from behind. They both tumbled to the ground, likely since his focus was on the TV, and she sat on top of him victoriously. "I'm more ninja than the Uchiha!"
Itachi laid calmly underneath of her, watching her with a smirk on his lips. "Is that so?" He wondered, behind her seconds later. She gasped loudly, throwing herself to the ground and looked up at him in shock.
"How did you do that?" She demanded while Kisame and I snickered. Deidara and Hidan were both clearly amused by the scene as well, watching with grins on their faces as Hidan stopped flicking through the channels.
"We do have chakra, you know," Kisame laughed. I pet the shark affectionately, earning myself a grin sent behind his shoulder.
"Get some, Uchiha fucker!" Hidan snorted.
I paused in petting the blue haired man to turn to Hidan. "Why are you always so perverted?"
"Why the fuck aren't you?" He demanded, his eyes locked on mine. "With a body like that, you'd fucking think you'd have the same mind as me."
Onyxcia was away from Itachi in an instant as she threw the Jashinist on the ground. "Pervert!" She hissed, hitting him with a pillow. "Don't talk about Zoe like that!"
"What?" He sighed, turning back to me while he got hit over and over again. "I'm just saying she has a nice ass."
"You're disgusting, Hidan, yeah," Deidara snapped, slamming to his feet in a matter of seconds to attack. Onyxcia grinned, rolling off of the loud man as Deidara tackled him.
"They look like brother and sister," I mused turning to Sasori who was also watching the situation unfold. Kakuzu continued to flip through the book, unbothered.
Deidara punched Hidan a few times in the head while Nyx kicked his sides with a large grin on her face.
"I'll sacrifice you fuckers if you don't stop!" Hidan snapped, grabbing onto Onyxcia's ankle and yanked on it, sending her to her ass.
"They're not ninja you moron, un!" Deidara cried, hitting Hidan harder.
"Will they be okay?" Beth worried, looking at them.
"I won't let them hurt each other too bad," Sasori assured, glancing to her. "They always fight like this."
"Morons," Kakuzu hissed, glancing up for a split second before turning back down to Stephen King's It.
Figured he'd like that book.
Sasori raised his hand up and seconds later Deidara was off of Hidan and back on the couch. Hidan glared, peeling himself off of the floor before stomping upstairs, mumbling something about being too tired for this shit.
Quickly after, we had all headed up to bed.
I opened my closet door, grabbing a large piece of foam out and glancing toward Sasori's deflated air mattress. He was currently in my bathroom getting ready for bed as I attempted to fix his sleeping situation.
"What are you doing?" He wondered as I tucked the foam under his 'bed'. I glanced up, beginning to pump the mattress back up with a foot pump I had taken from my older brother when I moved.
"I'm trying to fix your bed so you can sleep better tonight then you did last night," I admitted.
"I slept fine last night," He said as he flicked the bathroom light off.
"Don't lie to me," I laughed, quickly plugging the mattress closed. I pushed on the bed, listening for the sound of the air pushing out of it. "You should be fine for tonight. Otherwise, I'll get a different one tomorrow."
"How do you know I didn't sleep well?" He asked, walking over to his bed while I crawled into mine.
"You're human again, remember," I mused, smiling at him as he crawled into his bed. "And I notice a lot of things. The dark circles under your eyes basically screamed that you didn't sleep."
"Thank you," He smiled. I smiled back at him, flicking my desk light off with a quick goodnight.
Third Person
"You guys are so cool," Onyxcia mused, sitting on her desk chair as she looked at the two ninja sitting in her room.
Itachi raised an eyebrow at her, "How so?"
"Well," She started, putting one finger up. "One, you guys are both ridiculously strong. Two," a second finger rose, "You're both badass as fuck. And three," The third digit flew up and Kisame grinned at the young girl, "You're both hot as hell."
"Well, thank you kid," Kisame snickered as he stared at her. "You're pretty cool too."
Itachi dipped his head in agreement to Onyxcia's shock, "I agree. Not many people would take in an organization of highly dangerous criminals."
"You guys needed help," she shrugged, spinning in her computer chair. "And besides, I decided to help you guys before I knew you we're crazy, badass motherfuckers."
Tobi stood outside of the door, his ear pressed against it. His eyebrows furrowed slightly, You're not supposed to grow attached, He thought to himself.
"Tobi?" Beth's voice wondered curiously as she stood outside of the bathroom door, her hair wet. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, Beth-chan!" Tobi giggled, changing his demeanor quickly. The orange masked man skipped over to her, throwing a big hug on her before skipping back into his room.
Huh, the brunette thought, staring at her friends door. She shook it off, walking to her door and opening it quickly.
"Deidara! Get out of my bed, I have to sleep there!"