I do not own Naruto, obviously. A/N at the bottom if you feel like reading it.

Enjoy!

Third Person!

Elizabeth Brooks was known to be many things. All throughout high school, she was known for her naturally caring nature, her straight-a report cards year after year, and her capability of running student council all on her own.

In her grade 12 year, she was voted Most Likely to Become Mayor by her fellow classmates and teachers. She received many letters of recommendation from every teacher that had her in their classes, and even those who didn't.

She proved herself capable of many things throughout her 18 years, though there was one thing she couldn't master.

She was definitely not a morning person.

Deidara stood at the foot of the brunette's bed, his head cocked to the side. Beth was sprawled out, a limb in every direction as she snored quietly.

"Why the fuck haven't you woken her up yet?" Hidan asked, striding into the room without a care in the world. His magenta eyes landed on the girl and he scoffed, stepping forward.

"Shut up, yeah," Deidara hissed. "You're gonna wake her up, un."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Zoe sang from the doorway. She poked her head into the room to look at the two males that stood at the foot of the bed, Beth continuing to sleep. "She might kill you, Hidan."

Hidan rolled his eyes, "You don't even know what I'm gonna do, bitch," He sighed. "Besides, you sluts couldn't hurt us if you wanted to."

Zoe shook her head dismissively, walking away, "Whatever she does to you, I hope it hurts."

Hidan muttered a few cuss words towards the shorter woman as he reached towards Beth, ignoring her warnings. His hand gripped onto her ankle, pulling it towards himself as he ripped her out of her sleep.

Seconds later, he was doubled over, a foot in between his legs.

First Person!

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU JASHIN-DAMNED BITCH!" Hidan's voice shrieked. I smirked as I walked into the dining room, unbothered by it.

"FUCK YOU, HIDAN, I WAS SLEEPING!" Beth's voice followed seconds later, Deidara's loud laugh echoing through the lodge.

Kakuzu, Itachi, Onyxcia and Sasori all sat at the table, puzzled looks on their faces.

"Did he really try to wake her up?" Onyxcia asked, looking at me in confusion. "Did you even warn him?"

Snorting, I sat down in between her and Sasori. "Of course I did," I hummed, grabbing a piece of buttered toast off of the plate that sat on the table in front of her. "He then proceeded to call us sluts, so I decided to let her do what she wanted."

Kakuzu chuckled, shaking his head, "What a moron."

"Do you have any other names for him?" I asked curiously, looking up at the stitched mister. He cocked an eyebrow at me, so I continued, "I'm pretty sure that every day you call him a moron."

"It is an accurate description of that idiot- that imbecile." Kakuzu sighed, lifting his gaze to meet mine. "He is by far the stupidest, simple minded, thick skulled, feeble minded dimwit that I have ever met. The only reasons I continue to restock my hearts to stay alive is to make more money and to dance on his grave if he dies," He paused, his eyes narrowing. "When he finally dies."

My mouth fell open as Onyxcia let out a breath she was holding in, "Damn," she whispered.

Kisame stumbled into the kitchen moments later, a yawn escaping his lips as he dropped into the chair next to Kakuzu.

"Hi Kisa," I giggled, my eyes landing on his bed head. "Sleep well?"

He hummed at me in response, his eyes locked on the piece of toast in front of Itachi.

Itachi rolled his eyes, grabbing the piece of toast and holding it towards the blue man, "Here, Kisame."

"Thanks partner," His raspy voice grinned, grabbing the toast.

"So, Kakuzu," Onyxcia started. "You're 91 years old now, so what happens if Hidan gets to 91?"

"Hidan will not make it to 91 years old because of his idiocy, and I'm only 90," He responded simply, sipping at his coffee.

"So you're 34 then," I said, cocking my head to the side as I looked at Sasori.

"I am," he nodded. "I'll be 35 on Novem-"

"November 8th!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up. He stared at me in confusion as I grinned. "I am the mega fan, honey. I know everyone's birthdays."

Onyxcia giggled, "Zoe has been invested in all of your lives for the past 6 years. It's slightly insane."

I scoffed, "Says you. I'm sure Itachi would love to know about how much you adore the Uchiha clan."

Her eyes narrowed at me as she mouthed the words 'it's on'.

I watched as Beth, Deidara, Tobi, Zetsu, Pein, Konan and Hidan all walked down the stairs and towards the table. Hidan limped with every step he took, glaring at Beth the whole time.

"Hidan-san got beat up by a girl!" Tobi squealed, throwing his hands in the air for emphasis.

"He really did," Zetsu chuckled, pulling a seat out next to Kisame. "It was actually quite the funny sight. I wish someone got a picture of it. Me too."

"Fuck you all," Hidan snarled, sitting at the end of the table. "We all know I could kill any of these bitches if I fucking wanted to, so shut the fuck up."

I cocked an eyebrow, opening my mouth to retort but was cut off.

"If you so much as mention hurting these girls again, I will kill you, Hidan," Konan said simply, taking her seat.

"Poor Hidan!" Onyxcia giggled, "Everyone hates you!"

His middle finger rose up towards her, a glare settled on his face.

"How is your morning going, Bethy Boo?" I smirked, turning to look at her.

"It's going fantastically," Beth deadpanned. "Hidan attempted to drag me out of my bed and I kicked him where it hurts," She smirked. Hidan flinched, sending his glare towards Beth. "It was stopped by Pein pulling me off of him and Zetsu holding him to the ground."

Kisame snickered, "Good job, kiddo. Kakuzu will be eternally greatful."

Kakuzu hummed in agreement, dipping his head towards her.

"I would like to ask that you all refrain from enticing him to attack you unless there's someone around to help," Pein said smoothly. "I know it's a difficult request, but I'd rather not have you be killed by an angry Hidan if we can prevent it."

"Yes, sir," I smirked, leaning on my hand. Beth simply rolled her eyes, nodding at the ginger and Onyxcia saluted towards the leader.

"I wouldn't actually fucking kill any of them," Hidan said, annoyance lingering in his voice.

"We know," Deidara said. "We'd stop you before you got close enough, yeah."

"What are you hiding?" Onyxcia asked suddenly. Us girls were all currently scattered around my room, Konan claiming to have been around too much testosterone.

I looked up from my phone from where I laid on my bed and raised an eyebrow, noticing Konan, Beth, and Onyxcia all staring at me intently. "Who says I'm hiding anything?"

"You haven't said anything to us about you and Sasori walking in all giddy last night," Beth retorted, her arms crossed over her chest. "Something happened, and we want to know."

Konan nodded in agreement, a large smile spread across her lips, "I don't get girl talk like this ever. Please tell us?"

I sighed, turning my phone off and throwing it to the other side of the bed. "What do you want to know?"

"Aha!" Onyxcia squealed, flopping onto the bed next to me. "So something did happen! Tell us everything."

I stared into her red orbs blankly, "We kissed."

"I knew it!" Beth exclaimed, turning towards Konan quickly. "We were right. Deidara owes us each five dollars," She grinned.

"You guys placed bets?" I demanded, a deadpan expression on my face. "I should've known," I sighed, shaking my head.

"We wouldn't have had to make bets if you told us," Onyxcia pouted.

"Sorry," I apologized, a small smile on my face. "If anything else happens, I'll make sure I tell you all right away."

"You better," Onyxcia smiled. "We're your best friends, you know. We have to know everything."

"I don't understand, how did her parents turn to pigs?" Kisame asked, turning to me.

"Because they stole all of the food, yeah! They were greedy, just like Kakuzu," Deidara snapped. "Pay attention, Kisame, hm."

Kakuzu stared at the blonde, wondering if hitting him would be worth it.

I glanced around the living room as everyone watched Spirited Away intently, everyone's gazes locked on the TV, "Does anyone know where Hidan is?" I asked, looking around curiously.

"He said he was going to take a shower like an hour ago, yeah," Deidara shrugged, his eyes still locked on the TV.

"I'm gonna go get my phone," I said to Sasori quietly as I stood, making my way towards the stairs.

"She's going to let go of her breath," Itachi's voice sounded.

I shook my head at them, making my way to the bathroom. The door was open wide, the lights off. My eyebrows furrowed and I continued past it, looking into all of the rooms I passed.

I walked into Kakuzu and Hidans room, my hands quickly rising up to rub my arms that were soon covered in goosebumps. The window was open, snow flying into the room and quickly covering the hardwood floor.

I huffed, making my way to the window, placing my hands on it before my eyebrow rose. I paused, sticking my head out of the window and looking up where I saw the Jashinist sitting on the roof.

I quickly climbed out of the window, hanging from the roof as I hoisted myself up. My fingers slipped momentarily, a gasp escaping my lips quickly, but Hidan's hand was wrapped around mine in an instant.

"You could've fucking killed yourself, you crazy bitch!" Hidan snapped, sitting with me in his lap as he stared at me.

"Thanks Hidan," I breathed, pulling myself out of his lap, sitting next to him instead. "It's cold, why are you out here?"

He shrugged, staring at the trees, "It's kinda nice out here. I hate this snow shit, but at the base I don't get out enough to see any weather than shitty rain, so I wanted to fucking see it."

I smiled slightly at him, leaning my head on his shoulder.

"What are you doing, bitch?"

I scoffed, "Is it a crime to lay my head on your shoulder?"

He sighed, rolling his eyes, "You're gonna get fucking cold, and I'm not giving you my sweater."

"I know," I nodded, staring at the snow that blew all around us. "I'm sorry everyone treats you like shit."

He stared at me, "I don't give a shit about that."

"Sure, Hidan," I sighed. "You don't care. That's why you're sitting on the roof by yourself."

"I'm not by myself, bitch! You're here for some fucking stupid reason," He grumbled. "It's whatever, I don't fucking care."

"Okay," I shrugged. "But, at least you know we're all sorry now."

"Shut the fuck up, Zoe," He growled, glaring at me. "Or else I'll throw you off of this fucking roof."

I scoffed, hitting my shoulders against his, "Try it, bitch," I laughed.

Hey guys! Sorry I've been MIA for a few months, I've had a bit of a rough patch for a little while.

I had to put down my dog a few days after the last chapter was published and I've had an extremely hard time dealing with it (among other personal issues). I'm glad to say that I'm feeling a lot better now, and I should be updating regularly again.