So, I'll be doing demigods once all the immortals are finished. Should I also do some monsters?
WARNING: Might have some sex stuff in here…just sayin'.
CHAPTER 19: HESTIA GETS FAT ON ICE CREAM AND POPSICLES
Hestia was by the hearth, waiting for her appointment. That's when her phone went off.
"Hello?" she said.
"Hestia? It's Mommy."
"Hi, Mommy!"
"Hi, baby. Listen, I'll be picking you up today after your surgery's over, so just come out into the waiting room and we'll go home right away."
Hestia said goodbye to Rhea and headed for the waiting room. She noticed a magazine with her on the cover, and she also noticed that her hair was on fire. The article was written by a Titan jerk called Atlas…who sucks…like a lot.
INTERVIEW WITH PEOPLE WHO HATE HESTIA
Hello, world. My name is Atlas, cousin of the goddess Hestia. Lots of people love her, but there are a few who don't. Let's meet them!
I met with the Titan Kronos last week and asked him why he hated his first child.
"Well," Kronos said, "she's…boring and I hate boring people. And she doesn't like action or violence, which I love. Also, I just hate her 'cause I can. No get out of my palace before I shoot you!"
That, everyone, was why Kronos hates his own daughter. Tune in next week for another interview about the goddess Demeter, and I know a lot of people hate her!
Hestia was angry.
"Hestia!" a manly voice yelled. "Come back here before we eat you!"
Hestia couldn't even imagine what kind of dentists she was going to get.
Hestia didn't see the guys (yeah, they were both guys) until she sat herself down in the dentist chair. She looked up at the guys.
The guy on her right was wearing a mask already and had black scrubs. The guy on her left was also wearing a mask and black scrubs. They looked like surgeon ninjas.
"Hello, daughter," said the first guy.
"Daddy?!" Hestia said, freaking out.
"Yes," Kronos said. "How are you this fine, sunny day, which will soon be ruined by your painful screams?"
"I'm…I was okay," Hestia said sheepishly.
"Atlas, give me her chart," Kronos ordered.
Atlas handed Kronos Hestia's chart. Kronos looked it over.
"Kronos," said Atlas, "you want the topical?"
"Not yet, you rotten slug!" Kronos screamed. Apparently, that was the best he could think of.
"Aw, that wasn't very nice," Atlas said.
"So, Hestia," Kronos said, "we're going to pull your wisdom teeth and it'll be bloody and violent, because I am a Titan and like to eat my own children." He looked at Hestia. "You think Rhea would mind if I ate you again?"
"KRONOS!"
Rhea came stomping into the office.
"Oh," Kronos grumbled, "look who's here. The nice Titaness Rhea shall save you this time."
"You will do the surgery correctly," said Rhea, "and I'll be here the whole time in case you get any ideas." And she sat down in a chair in the corner of the room.
Kronos paled. "Can I make noises while I do this?"
"What kind of noises?" Rhea asked.
"Like…manly grunts just to prove I'm having success with the surgery."
"No," Rhea said. "It sounds like you're doing it, and I will not tolerate that." She folded her arms.
"Fine." Kronos grumbled some "comments" under his breath.
"I heard those," Rhea snapped.
"All right. Let's get this over with." Kronos made the chair go backwards. He picked up some tools and glared at Atlas. "Topical."
"Topical."
"Knife."
"Knife?" Rhea asked. "You have forceps right there!" She pointed to the tool tray.
"I meant needles," Kronos redeemed himself.
Kronos stuck the topical in Hestia's mouth and she gagged.
"Guess what flavor that is," said Atlas.
"Cherry?" Hestia croaked.
"Nope," Kronos said. "It's blood flavored!"
"Tasty," Atlas said. "Yum!"
"Novocain!" Kronos screamed.
Atlas handed him the needles and Kronos gave the drug to Hestia. Afterwards, the laughing gas was given to her, and Hestia was high.
"Mommy," she giggled, "I love Daddy now. He's so nice."
"No, honey," Rhea told her. "Daddy's a jerk who likes to eat little goddesses like you."
"Who?" Hestia giggled.
"Never mind."
"Now," said Kronos, "I shall now make you bleed!" He grabbed a pair of forceps and turned to Hestia. "Hold still, daughter. This is gonna hurt because I only gave you half the Novocain."
Rhea took Hestia's hand. "Daddy's kidding." She glared at Kronos. "You were kidding, right?"
Kronos nodded, then turned to Atlas. "Rhea, look! A distraction!"
Rhea turned around to see nothing. Kronos smirked and winked at Atlas.
"All right. Let's get started," Kronos said. He grabbed one of Hestia's wisdom teeth and pulled. Hestia screamed and Rhea glared at Kronos.
"What are you doing to my baby?" Rhea screamed.
"Preparing her for sudden death!" Kronos laughed. "Tell her to hold still, or I'll rip your teeth out, too!"
Kronos ripped out the rest of Hestia's teeth. By now, Hestia was in tears and Rhea was glaring at Kronos.
"We're done here," Kronos said.
Five minutes later, Rhea was helping her high daughter to the couch.
"Mommy will take good care of you," Rhea cooed. "We can take the gauze out in a couple of hours. How about some TV?"
Hestia drooled blood all over the pillow. "I want some ice cweam," she cried.
"When you're not numb, honey, you can eat," Rhea said. "Now watch this." She put on "The Simpsons."
Two hours later, Hestia spat out the gauze and looked at Rhea. "Mommy, can I have some Popsicles?"
"Sure," Rhea said, handing Hestia a Popsicle.
"Can I have some ice cream, too?"
"Sure."
One week later, Hestia had gained several pounds, because all she ate all day was ice cream and Popsicles.