This one is for Girl Poseidon. Thanks for the Leo idea!

CHAPTER 51: TEAM LEO!

Leo's POV

Ah…a nice day on the Argo II. Last night was really fun. Coach Satyrface let us all have some marshmallows and we burned them all because he sucks at giving verbal directions. So we all went to bed last night with half our tongues falling out of our mouths because it was so hot…like the almighty Leo Valdez here!

I decided to brush my teeth before breakfast. I headed into my connecting bathroom, pulled out my toothbrush and toothpaste, and began to brush my teeth.

As I was brushing, I happened to look in the mirror at my smile. Of course, it was flawless, but I realized something was very wrong. This "something" was the fact that one of my teeth looked slightly smaller than the other teeth in the front.

So, like the awesome son of Hephaestus that I am, I freaked out and ran to Jason's door.

I knocked wildly. "YO, GRACE! PIPER FELL OFF THE SHIP!"

Jason opened the door, looking concerned and bleary-eyed. "W-what?" he began.

I smiled. "Got you!"

"Dammit, Leo! You're such a pain in the—"

"Yeah…I know. Piper's fine. Listen, I've got a problem."

"What's wrong?" Jason asked angrily.

"Well, I think I have a baby tooth that never fell out of my face," I said sheepishly.

Jason looked at me, then that crazy bastard had the nerve to laugh. "Leo," he howled with laughter, "you…you're too old to have baby teeth! Let me take a look."

Jason pulled me inside of his cabin and looked at the tooth I told him about. Then he looked at me. "Uh…yeah…that doesn't look good, Leo. I'm going to drag you to Olympus and we'll get it taken care of."

"What does that mean?" I asked, clearly freaking out.

"It means we'll get someone to yank it," Jason laughed. "C'mon!"

No one's POV

Leo and Jason walked into the throne room and sat on the bench in the waiting area. Hestia—sorry, Vesta—was sitting at the hearth, minding her own business. When she saw the two heroes, she jumped and smiled at them once she'd settled down. "Good morning, Jason and Leo," she said. "How are you guys doing today?"

"Fine, Lady Vesta," said Jason. "Leo's having a baby tooth looked at because he's too old to have them. So that's why we're here."

"Ah," said Vesta. "I think your doctor's almost ready for you anyway."

A tall woman walked out of the exam room. She wore silver scrubs and had a mask draped around her neck like she was about to do surgery on Leo's face. Her hair was in a high ponytail and she was carrying a clipboard. "Leo Valdez?" she called, scanning the paper on the clipboard.

"Right here, sir," Leo said nervously.

"Sir?" the woman snapped. "Do I look like a sir to you?"

"Sorry, I meant Lady Artemis," said Leo.

Artemis nodded. "That's better. All right. You can follow me back and we'll take some x-rays."

Artemis quickly took some x-rays. The doctor wasn't there yet, so Artemis thought she'd get the job done real quick so that when the doctor came, she could just do the procedure with them and go back to her very lovely Hunters (that was sarcasm, friends).

"Hey, y'alls!" said a cheerful voice.

Leo glanced at Artemis, who was sitting stiffly in the assistant's chair. "Oh no…" she groaned.

Apollo walked in, carrying a pile of tools and setting them on the tool tray. Apollo wore a white lab coat and had a stethoscope around his neck.

"Apollo," Artemis said bitterly.

"Yeah?"

"You do realize you're not a medical doctor, right?"

"Yeah. But I'm the god of medicine, so how about you just shut the Hades up," Apollo replied cheerfully. "So, Leo, I'm Apollo and I'll be doing things to you today."

"Music Man, could you spare me the sex jokes?" Leo said.

"That wasn't supposed to be a sex joke," said Apollo sheepishly. "So…what brought you in today, Leo?"

"Well, as I was brushing my gorgeous teeth, I noticed that one of my teeth was smaller than the other ones, so I thought it was a baby tooth that never fell out."

"Got it," said Apollo, handing the chart back to Artemis and putting some gloves on. "Well, let's take a look."

Apollo leaned the chair back and examined Leo's teeth. "Well," he concluded, "I'm not sure why, but yeah, you've still got a baby tooth that never fell out. We're going to pull that right away so it doesn't bother you anymore. Now I'm assuming you want to be high, so we'll give you some laughing gas, in addition to the Novocain."

Leo shrugged. "Whatever, Music Man."

"Okay," Apollo said, putting a mask on. "So, I'm going to give you some topical so you won't feel the needle going in. Hey, Artemis, please hand me the topical."

Artemis handed the topical over to Apollo, who gave it to Leo. It was cherry, but for some reason, Leo felt like he was tasting metal because the flavor was so bad. Artemis placed the laughing gas mask over Leo's nose and made him breathe it in. Even before Apollo gave him the Novocain, Leo was higher than the moon.

Apollo picked up some forceps and began talking to Leo about his new musical called Stuck in the Womb with Artemis: the Musical. Artemis glared at her twin.

"So," said Apollo as he gave the tooth a tug, "I was planning on calling it something that was cool, like Apollo the Handsome God, but that sounded so…not cool. I settled on this last night while I was typing it up, so sorry if I pull the wrong tooth. I'm a little tired today."

"Uh-huh," Leo managed.

"Done," Apollo said, handing Leo some water. "Now don't do any heavy activities today, got it? We need to make sure you've had time to heal—"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Leo. "Bye! Love you guys!"

Once Leo was back on the Argo II, he headed into his cabin for some secret work. He was planning on conquering the world in less than two hours. First he did a bunch of computer stuff and went to his Start menu and he clicked on Paint. Then he made a picture by himself that said ALL THE LADIES LOVE LEO and saved it to his computer. Then he somehow got all the computers to say that as their screensaver.

Next, he decided to run around the Argo II completely shirtless. He knocked on Hedge's door.

"What?" Hedge barked.

"Team Leo!" Leo yelled, running off to Hazel's cabin.

He knocked on Hazel's door.

Hazel answered it. "Yes, Leo?" she asked kindly.

"Team Leo!" yelled Leo and ran off to Percy's door.

"Hey, man," said Percy. "Why's your face all fat?"

"PEWCY!" Leo screamed. "JOIN TEAM LEO!"

"No. You should join Team Percy."

"I gots to go pee!" Leo giggled, running off to Annabeth's door.

Annabeth answered the door. She looked tired from reading all the blueprints on her bed. "Hi, Leo. What can I do for you?"

"Can I pee in here?" asked Leo.

"No," said Annabeth, slamming the door in his face. By now, the laughing gas was starting to wear off, so Leo headed back to his room, did some more stuff on the computer, and out came a shirt that said TEAM PERCY SUX on it.