Happy late birthday, Icy! This one's my original idea, so I hope you guys enjoy it! Sorry I haven't updated in a long time…I've had awful writer's block!
So I know a lot of you guys like the Tyson chapters because he's so adorable! So I want to put him in one last time…what should happen to him now?
LUKE AND OCTAVIAN ARE STILL ALIVE…UGH, SORRY. I HAD TO DO THAT!
CHAPTER 62: MY NEW BEST BUDDY
Luke was sitting by his cabin at Camp Half-Blood, waiting for Hermes to come get him. See, today, Luke was going to the Olympian dentist for his cleaning (plus he hadn't been for about nine years, so it's better late than never, right).
Anyway, Luke was just chillin' when Hermes came down from the sky in his nice-looking flying hat and his nice-looking shoes that had wings on them.
"Hey, kiddo," Hermes said to his son. "Are you ready for your appointment?"
"Sure," Luke said in a monotone. "I don't like you that much."
"Good," said Hermes. "Now hold my hand, Luke. I don't want to lose you on the way up to Olympus."
Assuming Hermes still thought of Luke as a small child, Luke grabbed his father's hand. The next thing he knew, he was sitting on a wooden bench in the Throne Room, staring at Hermes, who had gone over to Hestia. Hestia, who was sitting by the hearth, handed Hermes a clipboard and a pen.
Hermes brought it over to his son. "Lukey—"
"Dammit, Dad, don't call me that stupid name!" Luke screamed.
"Lucas Hermes Apollo Poseidon Medusa Slangbottom-Castellan III!" Hermes yelled. "How DARE you yell out that delightful boyish name?"
"Are you my real father?" asked Luke.
"Yeah. Why?"
"'Cause no one would name their kid that," said Luke.
"Well, your mom was high on labor drugs when she named you," Hermes explained. "So that's what she came up with. We just called you Luke because it was short."
Luke pouted like a five-year-old and turned away from his father.
"Please fill this out," Hermes ordered. "I'm going to get the room ready. When I'm done, I shall come out to collect you for the lovely appointment. Dr. Hades will be assisting, so I guess he will be calling you back."
Luke rolled his eyes, but Hermes casually ignored him and ran into the exam room.
Luke was about halfway through the medical history form, when he heard Hestia welcoming someone into the waiting area.
Luke looked up to see a thin, blond kid walking towards him.
"Octavian," said Hestia, "you'll need to fill this out before the dentists take you back."
"Why?" asked the kid called Octavian. "The entrails of the teddy bears did not tell me I had to fill out a freaking form."
"Mr. Octavian," Hestia said firmly, "your dentists want to make sure you don't have any significant medical problems. You may take a seat next to Luke while they prepare the room for your visits."
Octavian walked over and sat down next to Luke. "What a bitch," he muttered to Luke.
"Totally," said Luke. "Whose kid are you?"
"I'm a descendent of Apollo," said Octavian. "And I'm also the Auger at Camp Jupiter, which—I'm assuming—you don't know about."
"Is that the place that lies on the outskirts of New Rome?" asked Luke.
"Yes," said Octavian.
"Never heard of it," Luke snorted.
Octavian glowered at Luke, then turned back to his medical form. "Should I make up a name or should I use my real one?"
"Well, considering these are gods, it couldn't hurt to make up a name, then have them guess as to who you really are," Luke smirked. "This is actually my real name."
"Sorry about that," said Octavian. "I didn't choose my name either, but I like it. I'm not sure I have a last name though."
Luke shrugged. "You can be Octavian Slangbottom…take away my first last name and I could just have the Castellan part."
"Sounds Roman," Octavian smiled. "I like it."
So the two boys started to fill out their own medical forms.
NAME: Lucas Hermes Apollo Poseidon Medusa Castellan III
DATE OF BIRTH: Doesn't know; doesn't care.
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Cleaning…or something…
Octavian was filling out his:
NAME: Octavian Perseus Theseus Hercules Icarus Glitterpop-Slangbottom XXVIV
DATE OF BIRTH: Whenever the Pluto my mom had me.
REASON FOR APPOINTMENT: Unknown.
"Did you make that up?" asked Luke.
Octavian nodded.
"Your fake last name is Glitterpop?"
"Sure is!" Octavian giggled like the little girl he was.
A man who looked all sad walked into the Throne Room. "Hi, Hestia," he said sadly. "My wife was yelling at me for accidentally stepping on her foot last night while we were showering together."
"I'm sorry to hear that, Lord Hades."
"Yeah. I'm a horrible husband." Hades started to sob and went into the exam room. Then he stuck his head out, fat tears and snot streaming down his face. "Are you Luke and Octavian?"
The boys nodded.
"Right this way," Hades said. "Luke, this is Dr. Hermes, and he claims to be your father."
Hermes put on a Darth Vader mask. "I am your father," Hermes laughed loudly and threw the mask off Olympus, where it cracked on the ground. "Now in all seriousness, we'll need to take some x-rays of your teeth."
Meanwhile, Minerva—Roman version of Athena—was doing Octavian's teeth. "Is this your real last name?" she asked warily.
"No," said Octavian. "I thought I'd mess with you guys today."
"How dare you do this?" asked Minerva. "How unwise of you!"
"How unwise of YOU for thinking that was my real name!" Octavian yelled at her. Then he let Minerva take x-rays.
Meanwhile, Apollo—who was dressed in a white lab coat—rolled a chair over to Octavian. "Okay, dude. Minerva has already taken your x-rays, and it looks like you've got a cavity right here. We'll have you come back in a week to get it filled, okay?"
"No! That's when the Senate meets!" yelled Octavian.
"I'm a god so shut up," Apollo said cheerfully. "See you then."
Luke and Octavian headed off to a café, where they bought some hot chocolates.
"I hate my father," Luke said.
"I hate everybody," said Octavian.
"Yeah. I hate lots of people, too," said Luke. "But I have a new best friend…you!"
Octavian smiled and looked up at Luke. "Do you have any idea how gay that sounds?"
"No," Luke admitted. "Congrats, man. You've just been accepted in the Luke's Best Friend club!"
"I guess I could deal with having a Greek friend," said Octavian.
A week later, both boys met up again for their fillings. They heard lots of yelling in foreign from the other side of the curtain where the exam room was.
"Luke Castellan!" called Hades. "Your turn!"
"Octavian Slangbottom!" Minerva yelled. "You're up!"
Luke put down his magazine (How to Give Your Parent the Silent Treatment for a Good Long Time) and Octavian put his down called (Happy Bunnies and Cute Kitties…and How to Murder Them if They're Stuffed Animals). Then both boys headed into the treatment room.
Hades put a blue napkin on Luke. "Sorry, all out of green ones," he said miserably.
Minerva put a pink one on Octavian. "Sorry, Luke just took the last blue one."
"You boys ready for the drill?" asked Hermes to the room.
"No!" both boys yelled.
"Excellent!" Apollo said jovially. "Minerva! Topical!"
Minerva handed Apollo a swab of orange topical. Octavian wanted to puke, but thought that would be disrespectful towards the Olympians, so he just grunted instead. Meanwhile, Luke slapped Hermes in the face and told him how much he hated him…and went on telling him how creepy his mother was.
Apollo gave Octavian the Novocain, as did Hermes, and they all waited.
Octavian had never had a cavity before, so he wasn't used to not being able to feel the right side of his face. Luke had had a cavity before, but he wasn't used to it either…it had been too long ago!
Octavian turned his head so he was looking at Luke. "Luke!" he slobbered down his chin. "Awe you gonna come to my camp sometime fo pizza?"
"No talking," Minerva scolded.
"Yesh!" yelled Luke. "I like peppewoni and gween olivesh!"
"Me, too!" yelled Octavian.
"What part of no talking do you not understand?" snapped Minerva.
"Luke, we need to drill now," said Hermes. "So don't talk to Octavian, okay?"
"Hey!" yelled Octavian as Apollo was readying the drill. "You know a chick called Gaea?"
Luke pushed the drill away from his mouth and looked at the blond kid. "Yesh! She's awesome! I love hew!"
"Me, too," said Octavian. "She said she would hewp me be evil and stuff!"
"STOP TALKING TO EACH OTHER!" Minerva yelled. "OR WE'LL BE HERE LONGER! AND I NEED TO DO STATUE THINGS!"
Apollo and Hermes filled the boys' cavities quickly and sat the chairs up. Then Octavian stood up after he'd rinsed a few times. He glared at Minerva. "Next time," he drooled, ripping the pink napkin off of him, "I want a gween or a blue one! Pink's a giwl colow!"
"I happen to like pink," Hades said. "But everyone thinks I like black because I'm depressingly sad all the time and I bring down everyone's mood."
"Well, dude, you kinda do," said Hermes.
"Octavian," said Luke. "Let's go order a big-ass pizza!"