ICY IS BACK AFTER STARTING UP SCHOOL AGAIN!
This one comes from Lost-In-A-New-World. Our favorite daughter of Athena will be here now! Please keep reviewing and all that jazz. Enjoy!
CHAPTER 70: DOLPHIN BUDDY!Annabeth and Percy were on a date at the camp store.
"I need some more candy," Percy whined.
"If you whine again, Seaweed Brain, I shall break up with you because you're so freakin' annoying," Annabeth snapped (although she thought it was cute when Percy whined).
"But Annabeth," Percy whined louder, "I need my candy!"
Instead of breaking up with him, Annabeth gave him a few slaps on the arm and told him to shut the hell up.
Once Baby Percy had gotten his fill of candy, they headed back to the cabin area, where some campers were practicing the campfire songs.
"Hey, guys," said Will Solace from the Apollo cabin.
"Hey, Will," Annabeth and Percy replied.
"Uh…Annabeth, I'm really glad you came over here. Someone's here to see you. Go inside your cabin."
Annabeth shrugged, kissed Percy on the cheek, and ran into her cabin. When she was inside, she stopped, dead in her tracks. Athena—her mother—was standing before her.
"Good afternoon, Annabeth," Athena said. Today, she was wearing a pair of gym shoes with a pair of green scrubs.
"Hello, Mother," Annabeth said, bowing.
"I am here to inform you that you're due for your procedure," said Athena bluntly.
"Um…"
"Time to get your wisdom teeth pulled," said Athena. "Come with me to the medical center."
Annabeth grabbed Athena's scrubs and Athena whisked them away to the OMC. Once there, Athena told Annabeth to sit down and read some fun magazines while she ran to get some paperwork for her to fill out.
So, Annabeth began to look at the magazines. There was an article called Dear Aphrodite, so Annabeth picked it up.
Dear Aphrodite,
I've got a problem. I want to tell my wife she's not pretty enough for me, but I just can't do it. I feel that she was very beautiful back in Ancient Greece when we were happily married, but now she's just…EW! How do I get her to look more attractive?
Sincerely,
BoltyAnnabeth read Aphrodite's response.
Dear Bolty (aka Zeus),
First of all, if you didn't want Hera as your permanent wife, you shouldn't have forced her to marry you, stupid! Secondly, if you'd like to make her look more attractive, please send her my way. I'll have her looking gorgeous—though she still won't look like me—in no time.
Sincerely,
Aphrodite
PS – Side effects of a complete makeover include: sexual urges and that's all.
Annabeth rolled her eyes and looked toward the door. Athena was still printing off the paperwork for Annabeth, so she decided to read another magazine entitled Tips on How to be Awesome at Prenatal Care (courtesy of Eileithyia).
Congratulations! You're expecting! But before you can welcome your new baby into the world, here are three tips that you should read as you're caring for your baby.
Number 1: Eat a proper diet. Eating a proper diet of nothing fun will give your baby all the nutrients it will need to survive outside of the womb.
Number 2: Get plenty of rest. You won't be getting much when you have the baby in the room across the hall!
Number 3: See Eileithyia for regular visits. She's the goddess of childbirth; she should know this stuff.
Here are some comments from different goddesses about how they took care of themselves.
HERA: Life totally sucked when I was pregnant with Ares. I did everything right, and he STILL came out wrong!
RHEA: I took great care of myself while I was pregnant. You should do it, too!
PSYCHE: Even though I was constantly throwing up, crying, screaming at Eros, and eating pickles wrapped in cheese, I still gave birth to a healthy baby girl!
If you have any questions about your pregnancy, or you would like to discuss delivery options, please contact Eileithyia at 111-111-1111.
"Wow…" Annabeth breathed. "Thanks for the advice, Eileithyia."
"Annabeth," said Hestia, "I can take you back to the exam room. Your mother and Poseidon are there waiting for you."
Annabeth threw the childbirth magazine onto the bench and followed Hestia back into the exam room.
The room was small, but it had just enough room for two gods and a demigod to hang out in there for an hour or so.
"Hello, Annabeth," said Poseidon. "How are you doing today?"
"I'm fine," said Annabeth. "You?"
"Great. Great. Okay, Annabeth, I have a question for you. Do you think Percy whines too much when he sees candy?" asked Poseidon, leaning the chair back.
"Uh…well…he generally whines a lot anyway," said Annabeth, looking up at the gods.
"I see," said Poseidon. "Well, Annabeth, your wisdom teeth are pretty impacted, so we'll need to put you under if you don't want to feel pain and whatnot."
"Whose chart are you reading?" snapped Athena.
"Annabeth's," said Poseidon.
"No, you ungrateful shellfish-eating parasite!" yelled Athena. "THIS IS NOT ANNABETH'S CHART! This is Piper McLean's chart."
"Then go get the correct one," snarled Poseidon. Once Athena left, Poseidon looked down at his patient. "So…if I were to choose between the two of you, you would be my first choice of a person I'd wanna hang out with."
"Thanks, Lord Poseidon."
Athena came back in with the chart. She shoved it into Poseidon's hands, then put on her gear. Poseidon glanced over the chart. "Well, it appears I was mistaken by Piper's chart. You don't need to go under, but we'll need to numb you up really well so you don't feel anything anyway."
"Let us begin," Athena said boldly.
Poseidon gave Annabeth some coconut-flavored topical. While they waited for it to kick in, Athena measured out the dosage of Novocain and gave it to Poseidon.
Annabeth, who was now high off of laughing gas (because Athena had given it to her as soon as she sat in the chair), reached for the needles. "I…I wanna do it, Mommy."
"No. We'll let Barnacle Beard do it today," Athena replied bitterly, handing the needles to Poseidon.
"Actually, that's not a bad idea," said Poseidon. He put the chair up and handed Annabeth a mirror. "Have at it, kiddo."
Annabeth carefully stuck the needles into her mouth and pushed down on the plunger.
"And while she's doing that," Poseidon said, "I'm going to go pee." And he ran out of the room.
Athena watched in horror as Annabeth jabbed the fourth and final needle into her jaw. Then, Annabeth handed the needles back to Athena. "All better," she said.
"You done?" asked Poseidon, sitting back in the chair.
"Yeah," Annabeth giggled. "I love you guys. You guys make such a cute couple!"
"EW!" they both yelled.
There was a knock on the door. "Excuse me, Dr. Poseidon," Hestia said, "but you have a call from Tyson."
"Tyson," said Poseidon. "How are—WHAT?! Dude, those dolphins are my personal slaves! Yeah, yeah, that makes them your personal slaves, too. Now, go to the Dolphin Springs and bring them back to life, dammit! Oh, and by the way, I'm not your real father. No, Tyson, that was just a lie to get you to go to sleep that night. I know you're my son. Yeah, I can't lie. Hey, listen, I have to do dentist stuff, so I'll see you when I get back. And tell Triton to make lobster for dinner…and I would also like salad to go with that. Tell Triton, also, that I—Tyson? Aw…he hung up on me."
Poseidon gave the phone back to Hestia, who was waiting patiently by the doorway. "Okay, Annabeth. Let's get this over with."
As Poseidon was getting the forceps ready, Annabeth snatched them from him and stuck them in her mouth…and she was laughing hysterically the entire time.
"Annabeth," said Athena in the gentlest voice she could do, "please let Poseidon do this. I don't want you to injure yourself."
"Shut up, Mommy," Annabeth drooled, blood dripping down onto the napkin. Successfully, Annabeth ripped out all four teeth.
The only part Poseidon had to do was the stitches, then he sent Annabeth on her way with a box with her teeth in it.
When Annabeth got out into the waiting room, she found Percy sitting there, playing with a toy in the corner of the room.
"I'M ALL DONE, SEAWEED BWAIN!" Annabeth yelled loudly.
Quite a few gods looked at her strangely.
Artemis closed the archery book she was reading. "Annabeth, dear, are you all right?"
"Dolphins are my friends," Annabeth said, leaning over to peer into Artemis' eyes. "Do you like dolphins, too?"
"Sure."
"Great. We can be dolphin buddies!" Annabeth took Percy's hand in her own. "Goodbye, dolphin buddy!"
"Bye, Annabeth," Artemis replied.
"Hey, Artemis," said Apollo, coming out of the door that led to the exam rooms, "are you ready for your physical?"
Meanwhile, Annabeth was basically asleep as Percy lugged her back to her cabin.
"Malcolm," Percy said, "take care of her for me, huh?"
"Sure. What's wrong with her?"
"She had her wisdom teeth pulled today," Percy said. "She's really high right now. I have to go to archery practice, but I'll see you later." And Percy was gone.
Malcolm sighed and continued to read his architecture book on Ancient Greece, when Annabeth woke up. "How're you feeling?" asked Malcolm.
"Dolphins," said Annabeth. "Are you my dolphin buddy?"
"No," said Malcolm.
"Oh," said Annabeth, sounding disappointed. "I thought you'd be cool enough to be in the Dolphin Club!"
Athena had left Annabeth's pills on the nightstand, so Malcolm gave her a couple and she fell asleep once again.
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