Okay here is Clarisse's chapter! Thanks to everyone who has followed, favorited, and reviewed this story! Beckendorf will have to be put on hold for a bit, because this one just goes with the order, I guess.

Shout-out to the author ponystoriesandothers for the idea for Clarisse!

I own nothing, too!

CHAPTER 77: CLARISSE GETS SCARED!

Clarisse was having a bad day today. She was at camp, and she was trying to forget all the stuff that had happened to her.

She woke up to Chiron knocking on her door at seven, and she really needed that extra hour of sleep this morning. Chiron told her that she would be late for her archery test if she didn't get up.

Clarisse then found out that she'd failed her archery test, so she had to go back and retake it. Then, she learned that Mr. D had sent a message to Ares, saying how he didn't like Clarisse. Clarisse then learned that Silena had had a bad experience at the dentist on Olympus, so she felt some sympathy for her. Gods, this day could NOT get any worse.

Oh, wait, but it could!

Clarisse was lying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling, when a knock on the door interrupted her thoughts.

"Who the hell is it?" she barked at the door.

"It's me, Mr. D," said Mr. D, the terrible wine god. "Your father gave me a message for you."

Clarisse opened the door to reveal Dionysus in his ugly clothes.

"So, Claire," said Dionysus, "Ares wants to tell me to tell you that you're in need of a dental exam."

Clarisse suddenly became very nauseous. Annabeth was afraid of spiders, Silena was afraid of looking ugly, and she didn't care what Percy was afraid of. Clarisse was a badass and wasn't scared of ANYTHING…except the dentist. According to Clarisse, dentists were evil and called people into their chairs to torture the crap out of them. She remembered a long time ago when she went to the dentist and they came at her with sharp tools…and she didn't even get a prize at the end! In Clarisse's Top 10 Worst Days of My Life list, this was at the very top.

"You can't make me do that," said Clarisse, trembling. "Dentists are scary."

"No they're not," Mr. D said lazily. "They are very nice people who get you high and take drachmas from you. Nothing to be scared of, Claire."

"It's Clarisse, idiot."

"Whatever. Like I need to know everyone's name around here," said Mr. D. "Your appointment's tomorrow at eight."

Clarisse hardly ate dinner, and she didn't get any sleep. She was tossing and turning all night, thinking about the needles and tools they'd use on her tomorrow. Then, she had a thought: What if they don't actually take my teeth out? What if they just want to knock me out so they can torture the crap outta me? Questions like this were NOT going to help her sleep tonight.

Finally, Clarisse gave up trying to sleep, so she got up and headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

Unfortunately, the second scariest kid at camp was Steve (and Steve just happened to wake up early), but Steve didn't bother Clarisse.

"What're you doing up so early?" Steve asked.

"Steve, gotta go get my teeth yanked out of my jawbone," said Clarisse. "Thought I'd get ready."

"It's, like, five in the morning," snapped Steve. "Go back to bed or something."

"Shut up, moron," snarled Clarisse. "I'm older than you. I can do whatever the hell I want, punk!"

Steve eventually realized that he couldn't argue with his half-sister anymore, so he went to plan something for Capture the Flag.

After Clarisse took a shower, she got dressed and reflected on her bed until seven-thirty. Finally, she'd had enough reflection time, so she decided to go to the OMC for her appointment.

That's when she realized she should make her I'm-gonna-die-so-don't-burn-down-the-damn-cabin speech.

"Listen up, punks!" Clarisse barked, once all the campers had gotten up. "I'm going to get my wisdom teeth out today, so don't piss me off when I get back. I'll also not be able to work out for the next week or so, so STILL don't piss me off!"

The campers looked at her, then they all scowled.

"Bye," said Steve. "Good luck!"

Clarisse nodded, slammed the door to the cabin, then headed to the Big House to go to the OMC.

When she arrived at the Big House, Mr. D was shoveling donut after donut into his mouth while Chiron just looked on disapprovingly.

"Good morning, Miss La Rue," said Chiron jovially. "Off to the dentist, I see."

"Yeah," Clarisse grunted. "Bye."

As soon as Clarisse entered the Big House portal room thing, Ares materialized in front of her. "You ready, punk?" he barked.

"Not really," said Clarisse. "But it's gotta happen."

"That's correct," said Ares. He put his hand around Clarisse's wrist. "Come with me, daughter."

Once Clarisse got to the OMC, Ares told her to entertain herself while he and Nurse Hephaestus prepped the room for the procedure. Clarisse did the same thing Silena did—explore the office.

First, she passed by the lab, where Asclepius was examining something under a microscope.

"Hey," Clarisse said. "I don't know who you are, but my dad told me to walk around and entertain myself."

Asclepius looked up. "Who's your father?"

"Ares."

Asclepius nodded and rolled his eyes. "Your father's so dumb."

"I know, right?" Clarisse cleared her throat. "What're you looking at?"

Asclepius went back to the microscope. "Trying to see if Helios has strep throat or not."

"That's a fun test, huh?"

"What's wrong with you?" asked Asclepius, clearly not catching the sarcasm.

Clarisse shrugged.

"Well, I'll go deliver the bad news." Asclepius scooted passed her and went into an exam room. Since the doors weren't soundproof, she heard the entire conversation from the hallway.

"Well, Helios," said Asclepius, "it appears you have strep throat. I'll need to put you on some antibiotics to knock it out."

"Why can't I just have some nectar?" Helios asked.

"Because it doesn't work like that," said Asclepius.

Clarisse headed down the hallway and she passed yet another exam room. This one had two girls talking to each other.

"Do your ears hurt, Hestia, honey?" asked a gentle voice.

"Yes, Mother."

"Well, I think you have an ear infection, dear," said Rhea. "I'll write you a prescription and Dr. Asclepius will fill it right away."

Clarisse eventually heard lots of doctors giving lots of patients lots of diagnoses. In one room, she heard someone screaming (probably because they didn't want to get a shot). In another room, she heard someone throwing up (that was pleasant). Finally, she began to head back to the dentist exam room, when she heard, "Clarisse? What're you doing?"

Clarisse paused. She turned to see Hephaestus in his forges work uniform, but he looked like he'd cleaned the uniform, so it was cool.

"Uh…Ares told me to walk around," she said.

"Well, glad you're here," said Hephaestus. "Come with me."

Hephaestus helped Clarisse into the dental chair and put a napkin on her. Then, he asked her about her health habits. Finally, he put the laughing gas machine on her and began readying the drugs Ares would use to knock her out.

Ares, who was in the corner the whole time playing God of War, wheeled his chair over to his daughter's side. "This'll pinch like a bitch," he told her gruffly. "Take a deep breath in and the laughing gas will help you not remember anything."

Clarisse inhaled deeply, then inhaled deeply again. Before she knew it, she was out—and no one gave her any information on what she should do afterwards.

What felt like a second later, Clarisse awoke completely numb and had gauze in her mouth. She was breathing fast, so fast that Ares and Hephaestus were freaking out.

"Should I get someone?" asked Hephaestus.

"No," said Ares simply. "She'll live." He turned to his daughter. "No straws, no exercising, no rinsing, spitting, or hard foods." He left the room.

Clarisse started to scream. "YOU DIDN'T TAKE MY TEETH AWAY!" she yelled at Hephaestus.

"Uh…yeah, we did," said Hephaestus.

"No, you didn't!" Clarisse yelled. "They're still in there, idiot-face!"

Hephaestus picked up the tool tray (which had the bloody teeth on them). "See those? Those are your wisdom teeth."

Clarisse was okay after that. Hephaestus handed her some painkillers and antibiotics, then hauled her drunk butt into the waiting room.

"Hestia," said Nurse Hephaestus, "could you have someone escort Clarisse home, please?"

"Sure, dear."

Hestia—who was in massive pain because of her ear infection—called Camp Half-Blood. "Good morning, Chiron. This is Hestia from the OMC. Yes, I'm calling to see if someone could pick Clarisse up because she's high."

She paused as Chiron said something unimportant and philosophical.

"Great. Thanks, dear." Hestia looked at Hephaestus. "He'll send someone up to get her. Did you give her the medications and everything?"

"Yep. I even put her teeth in there," said Hephaestus, showing Hestia the bloody wisdom teeth. Hestia looked like she wanted to throw up.

Just then, Steve came into the OMC. "Where's Clarisse?" he asked. "I'm supposed to take her back to camp."

Clarisse stood up, swayed for two whole minutes, then fell into Steve's arms.

"Okay," said Steve. "Let's go so you can get some sleep. She didn't get any of that last night."

After the two of them left, Hephaestus looked at Hestia. "If you've got an ear infection, why aren't you at home resting?"

"Zeus literally chained me to this chair so I can't leave. I haven't gone to the bathroom in three days," she replied.

Hephaestus didn't want to imagine that, so he looked at her. "Could you schedule my annual flu shot, please? Asclepius just texted me to remind me about it."

Okay, how was that?

Also…random thought. You guys ever have one of those strep test things? If you haven't, they suck! Anyway, if I were to do that procedure, who should get it and who should the doctor be? I realize it's not wisdom-teeth/laughing gas related, but the thought of getting a strep test could make some gods run around the table and freak out. Let me know what you think!