Chapter 3 - Young Love

I look up at a frustrated little face.

"C'mon daddy, it's easy. Look, jaguar, leopard! They don't even look kinda the same." Gavin bounces on the couch, becoming more and more frustrated with me.

I look again at the two pictures... I swear this must be the same animal by different names. Like Grey wolf and Timberwolf, Marine and Devil Dog, Coast Guard and Puddle Jumper.

"Can't we just agree to disagree?"

"No! I am right and you are wrong." He insists.

"Ok, ok! I'm just kidding this one is the Jaguar, this one is the Leopard." I only got it right, because I creased the corner of the jaguar picture. Lucky Gavin didn't notice, that's 2 points for my superior adult human mind.

My wolf-wife comes out of the bedroom, wearing blue jeans, and a dark purple zip up hoody. Under her arm she's holding a big 5 inch thick green book, with gold trim and an ornate cover her body is blocking from my vision.

After Dr. Grover left, she asked me if I would be ok without her for a few minutes and left to get dressed I guess. She picks Gavin off the couch and sets him down on the floor.

With a stern tone of voice she says "Go put your books away and clean your room, I need to talk to your father."

"But..." Gavin tries to interject, but she just looks at him with a look that made me want to go clean my room too. Gavin takes his book from my paws. He places his little paw on my arm and says, "Good luck." With a sigh he walks towards the hall, disappearing from my line of sight.

I look at her and smile "Hi?" She sits next to me, holding that book to her chest.

"My name is Kaia(Kay-uh) Wulfric. I was originally Kaia Wolfard, until I met a very special wolf who made my heart swoon. We were married 3 years ago, our son is 5, you obviously know his name." She places the book on the coffee table and opens it. It's a photo album, with a bazillion photos. She tells me about our families, or packs, as she calls them.

Apparently wolf packs are far more fluid than families back home. It's possible to join a pack without any familiar ties, or marrying into it. Many wolves don't even marry outside the pack. I was starting to wonder about incest babies, but Gavin has a smell similar to my own and Kaia's. But Kaia smells different than me. Maybe identification by smell is the only contraceptive to incest babies. She flips through the book showing me family members, giving me a brief explanation.

Gavin comes out of his room, wearing red sweat pants and a matching hoody with a black paw print on the chest.

"I cleaned my room, can we go now?"

"Daddy doesn't feel well, we're just going to stay here with him today?"

"Why do WE have to stay in, if HE doesn't feel well? Just give him a pudding pop, and we can go." He whispers to her, "He should practice his animals, he can't tell the difference between a Jaguar and Leopard"

"Hey, I got it right eventually."

He looks at me and says, "he cheated, he bent the corner of the Jaguar page. I didn't want to hurt your feelings, but you made me!" He says with an accusatory tone. Kaia laughs, and ruffles his head fur. He pushes her away, "Stop! Now I have to brush again!" He stomps off.

"He wants to look good for his little girl friend."

"He has a girlfriend?" I ask.

"He met Ava, a 6 year old wombat two weeks ago. He will grow out of it, just a little harmless crush. Besides, it's good for him to play with other species, especially prey."

"Well, I don't want to stand in the way of love, let's go! You can educate me while they play."

"I feel a little apprehensive." She says putting her paw on my leg. I turn my gaze from the photo album to meet hers.

She continues, "I know you may say and do things because you don't remember, but you don't normally like to go to crowded places. Especially not places of mixed company."

"I'm a racist? I take it I didn't approve of Ava either?"

She pats my leg "It doesn't matter." She averts her gaze in thought, then looks back at me smiling and says "If you want to go, let's go."

I smile at her "Yes, I think I would, and I think it will be fun." I stand up and offer her my paw which she takes and stands up along side me.

Gavin jumps out of the hall, startling us and shouts "Yeah! Let's go!"

I look at my feet as we walk on the side walk. Walking barefoot with these pads isn't that bad, it certainly isn't as comfortable as wearing Nike or New Balance. You would think they would line the sidewalks in the city with softer materials, but it's cement just like back home. Maybe I should invent rubber soles and shoes. I'd be rich... I feel a weight on my left paw, I glance down at Gavin. Every time we come close to a seam between sidewalk slabs Gavin would use our arms as a swing to glide over it. I look to Gavin's left and Kaia is looking at me smiling. "What is it?" I ask her.

"You're smiling".

"So are you."

"Because I'm happy." she says smiling even wider.

I look down at Gavin, swinging over another seam in the cement. He looks absolutely ecstatic.

I feel a warmth in myself, is this what I've been missing all my life, a sense of satisfaction I've never felt before? Almost as quickly as it came, an all too familiar sensation burns through my mind. Don't dare to feel satisfied, either by another's, or your own hands this will invert upon itself and burn you down. This isn't even your life, you stole this from someone else. You Do Not Deserve This. I feel my heart darken into despair.

"Kyle, what's the matter?"

"Nothing, why?"

I just now notice we arrived, we are standing just inside the front entrance. There is a perimeter fence of red, blue and yellow posts. Jungle gym, a tube maze, m and a wooden fort with slides and rope bridge connected to a tree house. The ground around these play areas is made of shredded rubber.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing, why?"

She crouches in front of Gavin, "do you want some ice cream?"

He nods, "yes, please."

"Here is 5 dollars, Ava should be here soon. Go buy one for yourself and Ava, ok?"

"Ok, do you want one too?" He asks me

"No thank you, buddy."

He puts his paw on my thigh, "I'm sorry I said you needed work on your animals, don't be sad."

I kneel down "I'm not sad, go play like your mom said." I smile and force my ears up.

Kaia says "I don't like this." She looks at me.

"It's ok." I can see her ears are bent at the middle and pointing out towards the sides like airplane wings.

"You are starting to learn how to lie about how you feel." She takes my paws in her own.

"We don't do this, we don't lie to each other."

I say, "I don't want you to worry."

"Well, if I can't trust you to be honest, I have to worry all the time."

I let my ears go, I can feel them flatten out.

"I was worried this would happen, do you want to go home? It's ok, there are too many different people here."

"It's not that."

"Well tell me, don't make me guess." She puts her paws on her hips.

I put my paw on my mouth and pace back and forth once, before I turn to Kaia.

"I am just scared of losing this, what if I hurt you and Gavin because I screw everything up?" I cross my arms and say, "I'm a different person."

She takes my wrists in her paws and pulls my crossed arms away from my chest and rests them on her shoulders and she puts her paws on my hips. She leans in close and says "That frightens me too, I thought about it after Dr. Grover left. You are not the same as you where. But I love YOU, whatever happened to you made you a better father to Gavin. He's so happy that you are taking an interest in him. That makes me happy, even if you don't want to pleasure me in bed anymore." She smirks at me, "but I hope you change your mind by January, I'd like to make a brother or sister for Gavin... I hope you change your mind sooner, but January is the deadline". She winks at me and gives me a light kiss.

I give her a light hug, "You don't even know how lucky I am to have you."

She smirks at me "I have some idea."

She looks past me, "look, look!" She points and I follow her finger. I see Gavin sitting on the rope bridge with a little brown wombat girl half his size, she's wearing a pink shirt with white frilly trim around the collar and cuffs. It says Princess on the front in white frilly letters and blue jeans. She has green bows on each of her ears and an ice cream cone in her paw.

"Is that Ava?"

"Yes, it is." she takes my arms around her waste so I'm holding her from behind.

I rest my chin on her shoulder.

"Gavin could do better."

She elbows me playfully, Ouch, I mock injury.

"Stop it!" she says with a smirk.

"At the very least he could get a girlfriend that knows pink doesn't go with green."

"Last time she wore pink bows, but Gavin told her he liked that shirt, and that his favorite color is green."

"Requited puppy love" I feel myself smile

"You are happy again." She spins around to face me

"Let go." She says.

"Oh, I didn't mean to..." I release my grip on her waist and start to step back, she catches my paw and pulls me back to her,

"Not of me! Let go of your fear. But hold me and Gavin tight. Forever, until the life leaves your body and we will be reunited in moon light." We embrace. I breath deeply, all the other scents fade away. I feel her scent intoxicate me, I feel the yearning in the pit of my stomach satiated by her presence.

I look out to where Gavin was playing and see Gavin waving at us, he point at Ava smiling. I give him a thumbs up while I hold my wife.

Ava grabs his paw and they run to a nearby jungle gym which must be at least 15ft tall. There are some other wolf cubs playing there, and before long they are all playing together.

"Hey, Kaia!" I'm startled by a female voice, there are a lot of people out here.

Kaia looks down and says "Chelsea, I was looking for you."

I lower my gaze, this must be Ava's mom. Another wombat, wearing an orange sundress with white polka dots. A large tan sunhat on her head with black trim around the massive brim. She has a thin gold chain around her neck with an infinity sign pendant. She's holding a large purse similar to Kaia's mom bag, except Chelsea's doesn't have any signs of wear and a pattern of black ZVs decorating it's cream colored surface.

Chelsea looks up at me "you must be Kyle?" She extends her paw, limply.

I don't know if she expects me to kiss it or shake it,

I take her paw firmly and shake, which she returns. "Pleasure to meet you, ma'am."

"Oh no, call me Chelsea please, you'll make me feel old with all that ma'am talk."

"Of course Chelsea." I give her a big charming toothy smile and she recoils a bit. Kaia rubs my cheek, not so nonchalantly directing my face to look at her. She smiles at me with her mouth closed. I catch on to her instruction, and smile with my mouth closed. "I apologize, I forget myself."

"Oh, perfectly understandable, I'm sorry, I forget are you two new to Zootopia?"

"Yes", "no" mine and Chelsea's voices ring out in conflict simultaneously. I choose to just sit quietly and smile through closed lips.

"No, we moved here 3 years ago for work. Kyle works for Apex Industries"

"Oh, very prestigious company, what do you do there?" She asks me.

"Oh, I don't like to brag." I try to deflect.

Kaia volunteers, "He works in the service department, he went to school to repair the SC-4060-2-4, so he's on the maintenance team."

"Oh, my husband has a SC-1260 at his trucking company, it's always getting jammed if you fill it even halfway with refuse."

"Oh yeah? That's not uncommon in the Sc-1260." I say having no idea what I'm talking about... wait? Refuse? I'm the garbage man and I fix the trash compactor? I feel my ears wilting, but I force them back up.

Kaia "hey maybe Kyle can take a look sometime?"

Chelsea "that would be wonderful, we would pay you of course. It's so hard finding reliable skilled laborers in zootopia. Usually we have to outsource from the neighboring area."

I smile making sure I keep my mouth shut, "I'd absolutely love to"

"Mom, mom, mommy!" Gavin runs up excitedly, "the thing, gimmie the thing!" Kaia reaches her paw into her giant purse and pulls out some colorful beed bracelet, Gavin takes it and runs back to where Ava is standing.

"What is that?" I ask.

"Gavin made it for Ava, out of beads and twine."

I look at Kaia smiling at Gavin presenting his gift to Ava. Ava puts it on her wrist and hugs Gavin. Chelsea makes a grumble that draws my attention, she looks visually irritated. Lucky Kaia was too distracted to notice.

"Well, I need to make an important phone call, It was good to see you again." Kaia waves at Chelsea, still watching Gavin.

"You probably don't remember your first crush, but I do. Kimberly Wulfric"

"Oh please don't tell me she was blood related to me."

I watch Chelsea walk out of ear shot from us and sit on a bench where she can watch Ava and Gavin play.

"No, of course not, that would be gross. But I hated her, she was such a stuck up little thing. Everyone said she was so pretty and smart." Kaia says while watching Gavin.

"Where is she now?"

"She married some big alpha, in the Lupu Pack. Last I heard she can't keep her face off the pilow, every season she is popping out more Cubs"

"Who was yours? Was it me?"

"No". She chuckles "I had a crush on Arron Lowell, I was 12, he was 14. He was strong and athletic. Everyone in my pack thought I would end up with him. I thought he was soo great."

"What happened?"

"A better option came along." She smiles at me.

"What happened to that guy?

"He made me the happiest wolf."

I smile before realizing she isn't really talking about me. My mind wanders...

"Are you hungry?" I ask.

"You're thinking about food?" She snorts at me "typical male! Oh and that reminds me." She grabs a hold of my neck scruff "are you insane showing your teeth to a prey?"

"I was just smiling, it didn't occur to me... and are you insane? I can't fix her 1220-7-rsx whatever machine".

"Sr-1260" she corrects, "it'll be good for you to have more friends that aren't wolves."

"That's not the problem, I don't remember how."

She slaps herself in the forehead with her palm. "But you acted like you knew about her problem."

"Yeah, I ACTED, I pretended so she wouldn't know I lost my memory." She stares at me for a second,

"Want to try some crayfish sausage?"

"I'd love some sausage."

Kaia takes me by the paw and leads me to Food truck. The smells oozing from this place were almost blinding. My mouth started to water almost immediately. But my brain was having a hard time getting past this being a food truck.

"You want sausage from this place?"

"Yeah, and so do you". She wipes some drool from the corner of my mouth. She walks me around the food truck. There are heated trays with all sorts of fish products. Each tray has a clear plastic sneeze guard protecting the contents from salivating customers.

As I orbit the truck with Kaia some spittle escapes my mouth landing on the clear plastic guard. Feeling embarrassed I bring my paw up to wipe my saliva away, but a female coyote wearing a blue apron over a white chef uniform, beats me to it with a sponge on a stick

"It's ok sir, I'll get that for you." she says cheerfully.

I begin to apologize before I see another wolf slobbering all over a plastic shield. This coyote girl, quickly dashes over to him, sponge stick and bucket in hand to clean his mess.

One whole row is dedicated to shrimp products-shrimp burgers, shrimp patties, shrimp sausage, and the same for crab and tuna. Crawfish only had a patty and sausage option. The sausage are skewered on wood sticks and rolling on hot metal rods.

Kaia grabs two sticks, passing me one. "Do you have six dollars?" I look in my pocket, I only have 17.50 left. I give her 6 dollars and put 1 dollar and a 50 cent coin in the tip jar.

"Impressed already, you haven't even tasted it yet." Kaia says as she bites the top, juices explode out into her muzzle. They run down the sausage onto her paw. She quickly licks her paw, running her tongue up the stick till it touches the bottom of the sausage. She sucks the juices before she runs her tongue up the length of the sausage several times before popping the whole thing in her mouth. Drawing the sausage out, a little bit of juice escapes her cheek and dribbles down her chin where she catches it with her other paw. The sausage looks shriveled and drained of its juices. My concentration is broken when she bites it in half and noisily chews. I almost drop my sausage.

"Was your's too hot? You look in pain." she says.

"No, it's fine". I bite into mine, the delectable explosion of flavor draws my attention from what I just witnessed.

"Do you think Gavin would like one?"

"No, he doesn't like crayfish."

"That's shocking, this is delicious!"

"That's interesting, you don't like crayfish either."

"Well, I do now!" I take another bite.

Gavin comes back, "she loved it, we're getting married next week. Dad you can be my best wolf," he looks at me and his mom. "Don't worry dad, I'll still visit."

"Visit?" I ask, Gavin's antics distracting me from the current situation.

"Yeah, I can't call you daddy anymore either. Ava says only cubs say daddy, now I'm a man." He pushes out his chest and puts his fists on his hips like a tiny furry super hero.

I inquire "Where is Ava now?"

"Her mom took her home."

"Want to eat and go home?" I ask

"Can we have Burger?" Gavin asks excitedly.

"Sure!" I say

"Wait, maybe we should eat at home? Kaia asks.

I take her paw, "let's get some burgers, then we can head home".

She shrug, "Ok, we'll need to be a little careful with our money".

"Ice cream too?" Gavin asks.

I look at Kaia shaking her head, "I don't think so, bud."

We grab some burgers from an out door BBQ pit. It was a great big silver cylinder mounted to a trailer, with a black panther operator. The fur on his paws up to his elbows is singed to his skin. Giving him the appearance of human wearing a black short sleeved sweater. He was friendly, but I noticed he didn't wear gloves while handing food and money. No one else seemed to notice or care. Maybe our immune systems are strong enough that sharing germs isn't a concern.

As we leave the park I notice some police officers walking on foot. A lion and a tiger, wearing very human looking police uniforms, minus shoes. Wearing badges and duty belts. I notice that neither one carries a firearm, they do have what looks like a taser, very similar to an x26.

By time we get home the sun has started to set. Gavin didn't feel as heavy today, but I have the luxury of two paws and not carrying a pizza this time.

He was so tuckered out, his eyes where closed while brushing his teeth. And I sat him in my lap to prop him up while washing his paws and feet.

I tuck Gavin into bed and walk into the living room.

Kaia is sitting on the couch drinking a glass of what looks like wine. "Gavin had a great time today."

"He really likes that little Ava girl"

"He was happy you came with us."

I shrug "I had fun too, he's smart and funny."

"His father is smart too"

"Hey, I'm funny!" She laughs handing me her glass of wine.

"Fine, you are funny too, but let's hope you are far smarter than you are funny."

Was that a dig at my sense of humor?

I take a sip of her glass, it tastes like a sweet wine, with a hint of cinnamon.

I hand her back the glass

"Do you like that?" She says swilling her glass.

"Yeah, I really do." these two days have been the longest I've been sober in weeks!

"Do you want a glass?"

"Yes, yes I really, really do, but I shouldn't. I don't know how to do my job. I was hoping to study some schematics or something so tomorrow..."

She interrupts me, "How much have you forgotten?"

"I'd say don't assume I know anything, even if it's something all wolves or Zootopia residents know."

"Zootopians, residents of Zootopia are called Zootopians."

"Thanks."

"You want to school for 6 months to get certified for this job, you want to self teach in an evening?"

"I just want to get a basic understanding of what I'm expected to do tomorrow."

"We still have your coursework, I'll get them for you."

I was expecting to work off of internet schematics, educational books should make this much easier. I start to have hope before the books start to pile up. 8 books as thick as a NYC yellow pages. So I begin to read and memorize. Until I'm woken up by a tap on the shoulder and a whisper in my ear.

"Come to bed."