Present

Jellal

I watched the red-orange sun slowly going down as it meets the sea horizon, while sitting under the shady tree on top of a hill near the beach. I remembered what Erza told me, that this is the best spot to watch the sunset because of the peacefulness. We used to hang around in this place, like after we go jogging, biking or sometimes this is where we go picnicking. Since this place is peaceful because it's located in the out of Magnolia, so quiet and all you can hear are the whispering waves, chirping birds and wind. This is where I also go when I'm angry or sad. This is where we used to talk about our problems or cry on each other.

I miss her so much.

I haven't seem her for five months already. Five months...I don't want to get used in not seeing her. I was used to in seeing her everyday. Like, in the morning the first thing I would hear is her sweet voice, waking me up, remind me to eat breakfast before I go to work and to drive safely. Or sometimes I'll be surprised to see her early in the morning cooking some bacon and eggs for me in my kitchen.

By afternoon, I would fetch her from where she's working or she'll fetch me from where I'm working. Then, we'll eat dinner together and afterwards she'll go to my condo unit or I'll go to hers and spend a night together.

I miss baking a strawberry cake, watching movies, playing, sleeping, shipping with her. I can't enumerate all of them cause I did a lot of things with her. She's part of my everyday life.

Why didn't I realized that she was more than a best friend and a sister to me?

"Hey..." I heard a familiar voice of a female. I turned around to see who spoke. "I knew I would find you here." Ultear says, who's standing beside the tree. Now, what is she doing in here?

"So, what? What are you doing on here?" I asked, with a cold voice towards her. A long pause occurred between us, until she finally broke the awkward silence when she said "Look, I know you're mad at me for hurting her and harming your child, that's why I came here to...say I'm sorry".

"It's not just your fault for harming the child. It was mine, too. Actually, everything is my fault because I was so stupid over you."

"Yeah, that's why I'm sorry...for being a bitch because I toyed your feelings. I hope you'll be able to forgive me someday. I did loved you before, but it wasn't the same as your love for me." She says and sat on the grassy ground too, but she's about one and a half meter away from me.

"It's easy to forgive, you know." I scoffed and gave her a sarcastic look. "What's hard is to forget and fix the damage has been done." I sighed, glancing away from her. "What if we will never be the 'Jellal and Erza' who were just friends at first and turned into 'friends with benefits'? The point is, what if she really decided to get out of my life? What if I can never bring back what we used to be before? I don't wanna lose her."

"So, you really love her?"

"I love her so much, not just my best friend or my sister, but I love her as in I love her. I-i was too numb and blind to notice her feelings for me. Well, before I'm starting to doubt if ever she's in love with me because I caught her saying 'I love you' to me several times while I'm sleeping, but I mistook it as her friendly way of saying those words to me."

Another long pause occurred between us. I guess it's really awkward to talk to your ex-girlfriend and the topic is about the new girl you in your heart.

"What made you realized that you fell for her?" She asked, breaking the silence. I glanced at her and recalled the moment how did I realized I was in love with her and also how I was coward to admit that I'm falling for her. "Well...she's always scolding me for thinking of you all the time, about our breakup. She was there to catch me when I'm down. She's always there to lend her shoulder for me where I could cry on and an ear to listen to me. She's always beside me during happiness and hardships, but I didn't see that. I was too blind to see that is was her way of showing her love for me." I started.

I continued, "The night you broke up with me, I got drunk and something happened between us because I though you are her. That's where it all started. I was wondering why she let me take her first, then I realized that the reason why is she got carried away because she loves me and because she wanted me to forget you for a moment. She just did it twice, but then as time passes by I already took advantage of her. It wasn't because of you anymore, it's because I wanted the pleasure she gives me.".

"Pleasure?"

"Yes, because of her love for me, she's willing to do anything for me and even give up her own body for me. Since she's the first girl who happened to be my best friend, who gave me that kind of pleasure. I also took advantage of her love for me by making her please me in bed. I'm kissing, touching, undressing her without making any commitment with her. I was a spoiled best friend because I get whatever I want from her, without thinking of her feelings. I'm kissing her in front of me to make you jealous, not knowing I'm breaking her heart into pieces deep inside of her. I used her to make you jealous and when I failed to get you back by making you jealous. I used her as a rebound. I asked her on a date, give her flowers, kiss her, like what we used to do."

The sun is almost down and it's getting darker little by little.

"Not knowing she's in love with me for a long time, I made her assume I'm in love with her during the time I asked her out, give her flowers and kiss her passionately, which probably doubled the pain I gave her. And that time...I'm starting to feel something weird towards her. The way I felt when I was with you, but in a different way. That time I'm starting to fall for her, but I was too coward to admit it myself. Then, you came back saying that you want me back. The thought of me falling for her was completely vanished from my mind because I thought of you wanting me back is a second chance for us, not realizing I exchanged our friendship for many years just for you. I just got the courage to admit that I'm in love with her...when she's already gone."

"I'm sorry, it was really my fault. Sorry for everything, about us, for threatening Erza, hurting her and your child and for...ruining your friendship with her." She says.

"I know, I hope I can fix what has been damaged between us. Erza's right...there's another girl besides you who truly loves me. If only I opened my eyes to realize that it was her, the girl who truly loves me, then this wouldn't happen. She's always right." I sighed and looked at our friendship ring on my finger. "I can't blame her for being hurt...I was unfair. She was always there to catch me, but when the time she's going to fall, I wasn't there to catch her. I'm a useless best friend."

"Do you really love her?" She asked, planting a small smile on her lips.

"Of course, I do." I nodded, without giving a glance on her.

"Then, win her back."

"How?" I scoffed at her sarcastically. "I don't even know where on earth she is. I tried calling everyone we know, even her family and their servants in their house in our old hometown, none of them have any idea where she is. Why...do you have any idea where she is?" I glared at her.

"I do."

Wait, she knows?

"Y-you do?" I asked surprisingly.

"I was in Rosemary city last day to visit Meredy and what a coincidence...I passed by on her parents' house, her old house...she was there."

"I-i called her parents and also their servants in their house many times and they always tell me they have no idea where she is." I suddenly jumped out of the grassy ground, standing up. Then, I realized the sun has finally went down and it was completely dark by now, only the full moon serves as the light.

"Until, now you're still a little bit stupid. They're her family, of course they would protect her. They're her servants, of course they would follow what Erza will tell them to do, if ever Erza told them not to tell where she is if ever you asked." She stood up from the grassy ground and laughed softly.

Why didn't I thought of that? I should have tried traveling back to Rosemary city to make sure she's not really there!

"H-how is she? Is she still pregnant? I don't know if our baby is still alive or not after what WE did to her, I haven't heard any news about her."

"Don't worry, she's still pregnant. Her belly is very big already and I bet she's already due. I suggest you must go see her before she gives birth, so you could be beside her while she's laboring. And you don't have to worry cause when I saw her, she's with Simon and it seems like Simon is taking care of her and the baby." She chuckled.

"What?! Simon?!" I growled. "What's the matter? You're jealous? You should be thankful he took care of her." She scoffs at me. Well, she's right. Simon do love Erza ever since before, just like Erza to me.

She sighed. "I know what you're thinking...that what if Erza deserves Simon than you. Stop thinking that you don't deserve her. Show her how much you love her. Those efforts of showing your love for me before, do it to her, but this time double the effort. Fight for her and don't let her think that she doesn't deserve you and she deserves someone else. If you really love her you will do anything just to win her back and fight for your love for her. Show her how sincere you are. All those love and care she showed you before, double the love and care you'll show her and your child with her." I can feel her hand on my shoulder.

"Are you willing to drive for six hours just to get Rosemary city to see her?" She asks.

"Of course."

"Then, go! Go get your girl. Don't just do it for her...for your child, too."

"What about you?"

"Here you go again, stop thinking of me. I'm fine and I guess someday we'll be able to let go of what happened in the past. Meredy and I'll be moving in Crocus next month, to start a new life. You too,start a new life with Erza and your child. Again...I'm sorry for everything. Be a good father, Jellal." She says while slowly walking away, heading to her car. But before she stepped inside her vehicle she says "Don't lose her again. I promise that no one will bother you two". I forced a smile on her before she completely steps inside her car. Well, I guess this a closure for us.

All I need to do first thing in the morning is to drive to Rosemary city to see Erza. I'm finally and completely done with Ultear, all I have to do is to set things right with Erza. Simon is my friend, but I can't just let him have Erza easily just because he loves her. I can't let Erza realize that Simon is more deserving than me. I will do anything it takes just to win her back and for us to be a family with our child.

I guess jealousy can be sign if you're falling for someone, just like to Erza and Simon. Right now, I think my jealousy over Simon boosted my confidence to win her back.

Ooooooooooooooooo

A/N: short update only :P by next week, i won't be able to update my stories faster because school is back :( but if ever i'll be update a chapter, i'll make sure it's long enough:))

Next chapter : Jealous? (Jellal's POV, past)

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