Welcome one and all to the second chapter of Aloha Madness! I am your host the Crazy Man! Well it's probably too early to publish another chapter but YOU DON"T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

Sorry about that! This chapter may be a bit worse so please be warned of what is about to occur. Anyways let the curtain rise on the second scene of our play here.

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN ANYTHING CEPT MY OC

"I LOVE CAKE" - Talking

'Its aight' - Thoughts

"I WANT CAKE NOW" - Everything else if I write it

Chapter 2: Sea of Madness

"Um excuse me," Sakura said while shivering because the impressive body of Kyōki was looming over her. Well, 'looming' isn't the correct term, as he was currently walking on his hands while whistling 'Entry of the Gladiators" (A/N The fucking circus music. You know the one.)

"Yes pepto-bismol?" Kyōki said while not taking his eyes off the road, which coincidently had Naruto walking a bit ahead of him. Kyōki also perked up when he heard Naruto giggle.

Ignoring the attack to the color of her hair, Sakura prepared to ask a question, "Why are you coming with us? I mean you could have easily killed all of us while we were waiting for you to reveal yourself."

"Very interesting, you ask a question that doesn't need an answer." Kyōki said while adding a giggle for emphasis. "But the reason why I didn't kill you guys is that I don't kill things that are cute."

"Well thank you for the compliment but-" Sakura said mildly blushing only to be interrupted by Kyōki.

"THAT WASN'T TO YOU!" Kyōki screamed at her face. "THAT WAS DIRECTED TO THAT BLONDE ANGEL OVER THERE!" Somehow pointing while still walking, Kyōki pointed to Naruto while said blond blushed slightly.

"What i think she is trying to get out, Kyōki, is that we were wondering why you took it on to help us." Kakashi giggled out while reading his favorite novel.

"OHHHHH. Very simple! One second though." Throwing his sword up in the air he took a stance while starting to walk. It looked like he was about to get impaled on his own sword through his nose. But at the last possible moment, he caught it on said nose. While walking he began a small tale.

"It all started when I was born! I was born out of the most horrible act one can imagine on someone, yep, rape. There was an escaped lunatic running around when he spotted a nun. There he said to himself, 'I've only been getting ass throughout my days at the asylum, why not get some pussy?' And well, you know how that train of thought goes." At this Kyōki gained an excited look. "CHOO CHOO MOTHERFUCKERS!" Getting a calm look again, he continued.

"Let us skip ahead a few years, the nun fell out of the coven, and blamed me for it. So i was dropped, cut, boiled, and even scalded at the tender age of 2. Given this it's hard to imagine why I'm still alive. But I guess that I was needed somewhere else. So I left her locked in a room with oil covering her and the only thing that she can do was light a match. I smelled that corpse from a mile away. She's in purgatory though now. Anyways, I then went on a spree of anger, rage, loss, emotions, hunger, and everything else that can cause a man to go insane. That is probably when I lost the last shred of sanity I had left." When he said this, Kyōki gained a serene look that left the entire group speechless.

"But when did you come to be by Wave?" Naruto asked cocking his head to the side. Kyōki almost tackled him in cuteness but remembered the sword on his nose. Flipping it off, he easily sheathed it in one fell swoop.

"I was getting tired of talking about me anyways, simple, I was walking by a lovely tree till I started singing, at that point I saw the mist. Like any insane guy worth his cell number will tell you, 'GO TOWARDS THE WEIRD SHIT!' So guess what I did?"

"Hn" Sasuke replied with his trademark grunt of annoyance. Kyōki blurred in front of him and slapped him upside the head with a fish. Wait, where'd he get the fish?

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! I'M THE CONDUCTOR OF THE POOP TRAIN!" Kyōki yelled to the sky as it darkened while raining just on himself. "STELLLLLLAAAAAAAA!"

Naruto at this point was laughing so hard that his sides hurt, seeing Naruto laughing brought tears of joy to Kyōki's eyes.

"Awwww Naruto is so cute when he's laughing, but to be fair he's cute all the time." Kyōki smiled a grin that could make a Marine smile. But seeing something, Kyōki took out his sword and threw it with all his might, the sword blurring out of the air and embedding itself in a tree.

The group getting startled took defensive positions around Tazuna, except for Kyōki, he was, well, talking to the buck he caught on his sword.

"Rudolph the red nose reindeer, had a very shiny nose!" Taking the blood from the sword, he wiped it on the buck's nose, the buck somehow in a trance to where it didn't make any noise.

"And if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows!" Pulling a flare from his pockets that looked to be sewn on with medical grad stitches, he shoved it in the reindeer's mouth while then lighting it. And jesus did that buck scream.

All the genin stood transfixed while Kyōki took care of the buck, but none more so than Naruto, as this took him back to a time where he was almost thrown into the insane asylum at Konoha. Not because he is insane mind you, but because everyone hated the demon brat.

'What is he doing? Why did he have to do this to that buck?' Thought 3/4 of the team. Naruto however took it upon himself to ask the question on everyone's mind….

"WHERE CAN I LEARN HOW TO DO THAT?!"

….okay maybe not everyone. But anyways, Naruto almost had stars in his eyes, while everyone else looked at him funny, except Kyōki, he was….juggling?

'Oh Naruto was thinking about the juggling.' Was the collective thought throughout the group.

"This is exciting and all that, but can we move on, my house is just over that hill over there." Tazuna said while slurring his words a little as he was drinking so much that it was a wonder his liver was still functioning.

"Oh of course sir! Right this way!" Bowing his head like an usher Kyōki gestured for the group to continue on.

As the rest of the walk was of Kyōki finding ways to make Naruto laugh regardless of the situation, the rest of the walk was pleasantly quiet. Except when they approached Tazuna's house….

"Oh you have a great looking house Tazuna! I wonder how it would look like SPLATTERED IN MY ENEMIES BLOOD!" Tazuna looked queasy.

'Let's hope that stays unknown.'

Whelp there it is, the next chapter in this story of insanity, what sort of training will be held at the land of waves? Tune in next time to find out! And as always, I will see you in the next chapter!

~The Crazy Man.