There were certain situations, ideas about the future, that even Leslie Knope had a hard time dealing with.

Sometimes all she could do was sit in her office and stare at her phone. Usually, the answer would come to her easily. In any other world, she would say yes in a heartbeat, she wouldn't even have to think about it first. The moment they had come up to her at Li'l Sebastian's funeral, she would have said yes, jumped at the opportunity, because that's what Leslie Knope liked to do— jump off cliffs and see where they take her.

But in this world, jumping off a cliff is harder to do when you have two people attached to your hands, pulling you back, trying to ground you and keep you in place. Could she still jump? Or would she be bringing them down with her?

If she chose to jump anyway, could she leave them up on the cliff and still feel okay about it?

She slept on these questions for too long, mulling them over in her sleep, trying to ignore what her heart was telling her to do. This is what she always dreamed of doing. This was the opportunity to advance her career, and there were people out there that truly and genuinely believed in her.

She imagined that, in doing this, she would still be giving up another version of her future. She would be giving up the image of kissing Ben Wyatt, and instead giving in to a lifetime of Mark Brendanawics. Mark was safe. There was no scandal in Mark, only the possibility of a ring and a home.

If she did this, she would be giving up the idea of Ben before she even got to have it. But then, she reasoned, maybe that was the best time to give it up, after all, before she got in too deep and found herself drowning.

And she knew what Ben would say. She didn't have to ask him to know. She could picture him there, his hands on her arm, his voice gentle, as if trying not to break. He would tell her to do it, to jump off that cliff, that he would support her. Leslie knew deep in her heart that Ben was always her biggest supporter, her biggest fan, and it occurred to her then that she didn't just start to like Ben Wyatt. She'd liked him all along, since the moment he brought Freddy Spaghetti to her for a concert that wasn't supposed to go on.

Ben was always making sacrifices for her. She wished she could make this one for him.

But this was all assuming Ben would even make this sacrifice for her. Assuming Ben cared enough about her to put his own career on the line, risk getting fired for her. She couldn't let him do that, even if he wanted to. Even if he offered.

No, there just wasn't room in either of their lives for a scandal. They were both important people with important jobs and they would move on because they had to. She would be strong and jump off the cliff because she wanted to save Ben, not kill him in the process.

Leslie took a deep breath and picked up the phone.

"Hello? William Barnes? Yes, I've thought about your offer. My answer is yes. I would love to run for City Council."

"It's over. It's all over. She's running for City fucking Council, Ann."

Ben paced in the living room of Ann's house, having driven over as soon as Leslie made her announcement. He was spiraling fast, in a very ending loop, and Ann was trying her best to calm him down. God, thank the lord for Ann Perkins, who now had to deal with the swing of emotions of both Leslie and Ben on different sides.

Ann sighed. "Do you want a drink? I think I have a beer in the—"

"Please," Ben interrupted her. "I very much want a drink."

She passed Ben a beer from the fridge while he continued to pace, thinking over and over again about what this move meant for him and Leslie. He had been so close, so close to finally saying screw it, and now this put a wrench in his plan. This completely erased everything in the Operation him and Ann were working for, but the worst part was he couldn't even blame Leslie for her decision.

Ann fell back into her couch and took a deep breath. "Okay Ben, I'm gonna need you to breathe. And tell me what you're feeling. SLOWLY."

She was right to add the last part, because Ben had been about to spout off unintelligibly. Instead, he inhaled deeply and took a moment to pull open his beer and take a long drink. "Okay," he said, testing the waters, "okay. How I'm feeling, um… Sad. I'm feeling very sad."

"Why do you feel sad?"

"Because I think I'm being kind of a jerk about this. Because she deserves to run for City Council and I'm just upset because it means I can't kiss her."

"And why can't you kiss her?"

Ben's frustrations rose, but he forced it all back down. Deep breaths, deep breaths. "Because if I made a move on her now, it would be even riskier than before. Before, it was my job and her Parks job and a scary boyfriend. But now, if I made a move on her, it would be that scary boyfriend and my job on top of her election completely crashing down. It would be a major scandal, it would crush her career in politics, and I… I could never do that to her."

Ann smiled softly at Ben as he continued to pace. "Just you saying that proves you care about her a whole lot."

He felt the ridiculous urge to cry that he choked back. "I— God, yeah, I do. I care about her so much, I would do… anything for her."

"So, you're torn between wanting to act on your feelings for her and backing down for her sake?"

"I mean— yes. Of course. I want to be with her more than anything, but listen… if I'm keeping Leslie from succeeding, from… from running the whole world one day, I don't want to be the one holding her back." Ben froze in his pacing, his whole body shaking just slightly, his mind moving too quickly. Everything hurt. His heart felt like it was going to rip open and there would be no one there to pick up the pieces. "I can't be the one holding her back, Ann. When I say I would do anything for her, that includes backing off. Staying away from her."

Ann frowned, looking sad. "Even if that's really not what she wants?"

It broke his heart to hear those words, knowing there was truth behind them. "Yes. Yes, even then."

She didn't answer Ben for a long time. She stared at her hands in her lap, and Ben suddenly couldn't move, rooted to his spot on the carpet, wondering how long he would have to stand here before he collapsed. And then Ann stood up and gripped his shoulders, using that same strength she used at the Li'l Sebastian memorial. "Ben, I'm going to ask you something, and I'm going to need you to be a little selfish. Tell the truth. Think about you and you only, not Leslie, not her running for office, or your jobs, or her future. Can you do that for me?"

He swallowed hard. "I'll try."

Ann looked him directly in the eye. "If you could be with Leslie… really be with her, right now, would you do it?"

Ben knew the answer immediately. "Yes," he breathed.

"And you really, really like her? Care for her?"

"More than anything."

"Then don't you think it's worth it? That she's worth it? All the risk, the fear, everything you would have to go through to be with her… if she wanted that same thing, isn't that worth it?"

Something clenched in his stomach, twisting and tightening. "I… yeah. Yeah, probably. You're right."

Ann smacked his arm. "Then get your ass out there, Wyatt! Make your move! Test the waters, see how she reacts. You'll never know how you feel unless you try."

She was right. She was always right. God, just then, he was beginning to understand why Leslie always insisted Ann Perkins was so great.

"I'll try. I promise."

Leslie announced her running for City Council officially in Ramsett Park, and the first person she saw was Ben, wearing a "Knope 2012" badge and clapping for her, pride etched in his features. Genuine, sincere pride that couldn't be faked. Her heart swelled with affection for him.

But she couldn't think about him just then.

After her announcement, she wandered the park to talk to people, and there were so many hands to shake and smiles to exchange. It was thrilling, and despite that nagging thought of Ben in the back of her head, she was having the time of her life. This, campaigning, running, its all she had ever wanted, and it was coming to life here and now because there were people out there who recognized the hard work she had put in. She felt like absolutely nothing could bring her down.

Mark walked in late.

He had come in towards the end of her announcement, looking frazzled. He was wearing a "Knope 2012" button, at the very least, but there wasn't the same happiness or pride there as was with Ben.

Leslie hated that now, she couldn't stop comparing Ben and Mark. It was hard not to. Everything Ben did for her was all she ever wanted out of Mark, and for the first time, she was starting to realize that Mark never really would do that for her. He would never be it for her.

He would have to be anyway. Mark would have to be the one she kisses goodnight, the one she would steal clothing off of, and exchange rings with. She would have to bear his children and they would grow old together and—

Oh god. She couldn't do this.

She spotted Mark then, and what was worse, he was talking to the reporter Shauna Malwae-Tweep. The same reporter he slept with over a year ago, just before him and Leslie got together. It made her mad then, and it made her mad now. She moved a little closer to try and catch a snippet of their conversation.

"So how do you feel about your girlfriend running for City Council, Mark?" Shauna asked him, her paper and pen in hand.

Mark shrugged, looking noncommittal. "I mean, she's happy, it's all great, I guess."

"You guess?"

"She'll be around less. Sucks when she gets busy, it's like she stops making time for me." Mark sighed, and gave Shauna an odd look. "Honestly, between you and me, I don't get any of this. It's all just for show, there's no way it's going to last."

Shauna tilted her head, moving her pen to paper. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, Leslie's all happy and excited now, but that won't last. I'm honestly not sure she has what it takes to run for City Council. She's great and I love her, I do, but Leslie's like… a lost puppy sometimes. She gets over-eager and overexcited and I just want to get her back on the right track." Mark paused, and stared as he noticed Shauna writing in her notepad. "Wait, this is all off the record, isn't it?"

That was all Leslie needed to hear. She pushed through the crowds of people and away from Mark and Shauna, ignoring people yelling her name and trying to get quotes. She ran out of the park and didn't stop until she found her car in the parking lot, heaving against and trying to get a proper breath. The world was spinning and when she heard footsteps, for a second she thought it was Mark.

But the light hands that touched her shoulders didn't belong to Mark— they were all Ben. And she instantly fell into him, pressing against his chest and sobbing into his shirt. He didn't say anything at first, just held her and rubbed her arms, soothing her softly in a way only Ben Wyatt could. He was warm, and the two of them fit so perfectly together that for a moment it felt like they were made for each other. She was never meant to be held by anyone else.

He tilted her chin up when she started to calm down, wiping her tears away with the pad of his thumb. "Do you wanna talk about it?" he whispered, asking her permission. And in that moment, Leslie took another leap. This jump was just a little bit more foolish, but Ben made her want to say screw it more than anything.

"If I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone else?" she asked him.

He nodded immediately. "You have my word. You can tell me anything."

She took a deep breath and tried to figure out how to let go of the words. She'd been holding it in for over a year now, since the night it happened, something she still thought about before she fell asleep, something she still hadn't even told her best friend Ann. Her own terrible, stupid little secret that was driving her crazy. "There's another reason why I haven't broken up with Mark yet."

Ben's eyes widened, as if immediately understanding, and his eyes darted to her stomach. "Good lord, you're not—"

"No!" she exclaimed, hitting him lightly. "God no! This goes back way further than that. The night Mark kissed me on the bench next to the pit. Have I ever told you that story?"

He shook his head. "Only that it happened."

She gripped his arm for support, and he held her tight. "Something else happened that night. Something that… that kind of started all of this."

Leslie knew she should say no. She had every intention of holding her ground, of telling him to go home and then forget this ever happened, because she and Mark should have just been friends. There was no place for a relationship between the two of them, not now. Maybe not ever. He wasn't great with commitment anyway. Leslie would just end up feeling insecure whenever a girl like Shauna Malwae-Tweep would come around.

The words were on the tip of her tongue, and he was standing up, and it was perfect timing. No, no no. No, I can't kiss you. No, I can't be with you. No, go home. It can't be that hard to say no.

But then there was one drunken misstep. But not Mark's. It was Leslie. Leslie's own drunken misstep, pushing at Mark's chest as if that would solve any of her problems, not realizing just how close the pit really was. Leslie pushed at his chest in a terrible effort to say no, took one step too far, and then Mark was gone. Tumbling down the pit, and he didn't have a hardhat to protect him from the rocks. Leslie screamed, and everything was a blur, and suddenly Ann was there. Ann, who told her Mark suffered a concussion. Ann, who told Leslie that Mark was lucky his head hadn't split open. Ann, who thought Mark was too drunk and that's why he tripped. Not even Mark knew the full story, too dizzy from his concussion and the alcohol to remember the details.

It was all Leslie's fault. How could she possibly say no now?

By the time Leslie finished her story, Ben was gaping, his shaky hand over his mouth. "So, let me get this straight… you decided to date Mark because you were scared you nearly killed him? And now you're trying to, to… atone, or something?"

Leslie sniffed, wiping away the remains of her tears. "It sounds very dramatic when you say it like that, but yes."

"Oh my god," he said, panicky at first. But then again, "oh my god," he whispered, softening, and his complete attention moved back to her. His arms were still around her and their bodies were still pressed together and she enjoyed the way he felt against her. "Leslie," he said, her name soft in his mouth. "That's… that's not a good foundation to build a relationship on. Oh god, because you feel guilty? Like you owe this to him, to the universe? You deserve so much better than this."

Somewhere deep inside her, she knew this. Maybe she even knew it for a long time. But she liked hearing Ben say it. Maybe it was those words that gave her the confidence for her next. "Do I deserve something like… you?"

Ben's breath caught in his throat, and he didn't answer at first, as if worried he hadn't heard her correctly. "I… Leslie, you deserve even better than me. Better than anyone."

Her breath was shaky coming out, and she realized just how close the two of them were standing. She saw every emotion in his eyes. "I'm not sure there is anyone better than you," she told him.

He leaned in closer to her, as if pulled forward by some magnetic force, and for a moment, Leslie was utterly terrified at the possibility. She told herself this wasn't going to happen. She told herself that she wouldn't fall for Ben, she wouldn't kiss Ben, she would leave it all alone so she could move on and avoid a scandal and run for office and—

His lips looked very soft. She could feel his breath hot on her skin. His hands held her tighter and pulled her closer and then their foreheads touched, unable to stop looking at the other. There was a beat, a hint of fear, before Ben started to close the distance…

Leslie's phone rang, and the two of them sprang away from each other as if they had been burned, before their lips could even touch. Both were breathing heavy with imagined possibility and alternate universes where they could be together, and oh god, what was she thinking? She fumbled for her phone and saw Mark's name.

"I'm sorry," she told Ben, and she meant that more than anything. "I… I'm so sorry."

And then she ran off again, back towards Ramsett Park to take the phone call from Mark. Her heart ached, but in the end, maybe it was for the best. Ben loved his job, Leslie was running for office, they would just have to make it work without each other.

Maybe it just really wasn't meant to be after all.