A/N: HUZZAH MY DUCKLINGS HAVE FINALLY HATCHED! Now I have two little baby quackers to take care of and they are so bloody CUTE! So happy right now...
...alright, moment of glee over!
I return again my subjects! THE I's have it! Ya'll are getting another chapter! For any wondering, YES I have seen Jurassic World, and I bloody loved it! Indominus Rex was indeed a bloody clever girl, downright remarkable, really. I found that her death was rather sudden, however, amusing as it was.
And when I saw that there were so very few Naruto crossovers with it and all the INSANITY that takes places throughout, well, the gears in my mind got to turning. As another note, this is a sort of prequel to the "Not Going Home" series as a whole, chronicling the adventures of our dimension hopping blond.
Therefore, before reading this, I SERIOUSLY suggest you stop and read that, first before venturing into the silliness that is this crack ficlet.
LET THE NEW ERA BEGIN! Also yes, I've purged another few stories as of this mark. Now...
...off we go! I proudly present another chapter for Clever Girl! Its meant to be short and sweet, so I hope ya like it! AND YES, I take some unabashed shots at Jurassic Park Three, here =D And yes, I strongly believe that there was more than one Spino only Isla Sorna. This story reflects that belief. I also credit the brilliant Muddle Not Fiddle by Evilfuzzy9 for inspiring me to do this. Now...
...for reals this time! Hope ya like it! Its nice and long! And the FEELS! Prepare yourself for the funny's AND feels! Its derpy, funny-full of fourth-wall breaking-silly, not to mention filled with drama at the end and...THE RESULT OF YOUR VOTES!
It makes me a little sad, knowing that this story is coming to a close, now. So...
...onto the story. Despite my sorrows, I play blatant homage to a certain madman/comedian here, after all, I could certainly use a good laugh atm...
Speaking of this series, a fan of mine, Hail Lord Archanfel, has suggested something:
Subject: Clever Girl
I just had an idea. The Misadventures of Diny and Indy. A story about the girls when Naruto isn't around. It have chapters about Indy trying to get her sister used to everyday things like staying dressed. Or another chapter of them trying to get driver's licenses (Piccolo and Goku style).
And personally, I think it would quite easy for you to accomplish given that you've already gotten their characters made and fleshed out.
Bonus idea: Killa's Grand Day Out
Whaddya think, guys? Should I go for it? One last thing...
...THIS CHAPTER PULLS OUT ALL THE STOPS! Also, I credit Alien Resurrection for a certain scene here...
"Why did you give me this ring? I fail to see the purpose of such a device. Why does it go on my finger?"
"Ugh...you really are lost when it comes to human customs, ain'tcha? Look, I gave you the ring 'cuz-"
"Oooh, shiny~!"
"Diny, don't you DARE!"
~Naruto, Indy, and Diny~!
Bites and Ice Cream
VIVA LA SLAUGHTER!
Always wanted to say that.
You know, there's something incredibly gratifying about turning the tables on your enemy. Take that last moment in Ex Machina when Ava-and you'll be hearing about the rest of that little journey veeery soon!-escapes and stabs the crap out of her captor for imprisoning her all those years. WATCH IT. This is one of those moments. The difference being? Blood. Lots of blood. And dinosaurs. Plenty of those, too. Sharp, pointy teeth and bullets knives and guns galore.
But then again, we're not dealing with an AI here, are we. No no no, compared to THAT adventure, this is a cakewalk by comparsion.
Regardless, its been one hell of a ride! I've done everything I've wanted to in this universe and more, even found myself a strange little family despite my best efforts not to. So, say it with me folks, lets PUT A SMILE on their faces, one last time, the only way we know how!
With gratuitous, bloody, violence! By unleashing every madman I've ever met and bringing out my favorites!
Also...
...VIVA LA SHARP POINTY THINGS!
"FLY MY PRETTIES! FLY! Kill all the guys! LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR!"
Naruto cackled wildly, whistling a merry tune as he waded into the massacre, arms spread wide. There was certain beauty to be beheld in the bloody carnage unfolding around him; he felt as though he could break out into song trained or not, most men simply weren't prepared for the eventuality of a raptor attack. You couldn't train for that sort of thing. Toss in a xenomorph, a pair of jurassic girls and you had a massacre waiting to happen. Why, add a few missiles and just a couple of psycopaths and it was Arkham all over again!
Oh, wait...
"Aaaaah!" A good ol fashioned Willhelm scream-his favorite!-arced through the air as another mangled body sailed across his path. Sidestepping the tumbling corpse, he waltzed up to a sniper, lurking on the edge of the fray and tapped him upon the shoulder. "Moshi, moshi? Anyone there?" A helmeted head tilted in that direction, jerking in surprise as a fist tore that helmet free-
"Eat! Boom! Stick!"
-and mere moments later, bludgeoned him to death with his own weapon.
When another actually dared to shoot in his direction, he simply flowed around the bullets, walked up behind the poor sod, and stabbed him in the back. Armored vests simply weren't made to stand up to something like the Vorpal Blade. Handy little thing. He'd have to thank Alice for that when he got the chan-
"Missile lock, you monster."
GLADO'S voice chirped through his headset a split second before the blast hit. Naruto spun, just in time for the explosive cylinder to fill his vision. He was already moving, already dodging, when he saw Blue and Indy a ways behind him-the true recipients of the projectile. In the time that it took him to realize this, his body had already moved of its own accord, thrusting itself back into the path of the rocket-propelled-grenade.
One word pushed past his lips.
"Shit."
Then he could only grunt in surprise as the concussive blast ripped him from his feet and tossed him across the forest floor.
THOOM!
Indy felt the explosion as giant slap across her face; as if an angry god had reached down and flattened her with his hand.
A.
Hot.
Fiery.
Hand.
Fire lanced up her side as she tumbled to the ground in a heap, parts of her dress-already bloodied and soiled from so many kills and her relentless running-smoldered away at the hip, exposing a long, muddied leg, her shin scraping painfully across stones. Somewhere ahead of her, she thought she saw a brightly colored shape streak across her vision.
A terrible, awful thought plucked at her heartstrings.
...Naruto?"
Another explosion hit.
Her ears rang madly, the world swimming around her in shades of black and white. She touched a hand to the side of her face and it came away bloody; her eardrums had burst beneath the force of the explosion. Even now she could feel the delicate inner workings of her inner ears stitching themselves back together. She tried to stand, but her legs betrayed her. For a horrific hell, she couldn't find her balance. Helpless as a hatchling, she could only lay there, groaning in pain.
And in that moment, the muzzle of a gun pressed itself to the side of her head. Indy stiffened.
Raised her gaze.
A man stood over her, holding a rife in quivering hands. His mouth flapped, but no sound emerged.
"Don't move!" she read his lips. Saw his finger tighten on the trigger, the trigger that would put a bullet in her skull-
And then he spasmed.
Gored, like a pig on a spit.
The man choked, sputtering on his own blood.
A bright, scarlet hand thrust itself through his stomach in a shower of bright red gore, fingers wriggling like mad insects. As she looked on another hand joined the first, thrusting itself through the soldier's abdomen with almost primitive ease. The man juddered and shuddered violently, blood frothing at his lips as a mop of dark, messy hair rose behind him. Then the hands clenched-closed-almost casually, as if they'd just lost interest in their victim...
...and ripped.
With a revolting-yet also slightly exciting for Indy-spatter, the man toppled.
Snarling, she picked herself up, just in time to see Diny disembowel the unlucky soldier who'd tried to shoot her in the first place, ripping her arms free-clinging to his back like some kind of inane primate. Riding him to the ground with a laugh she performed a small flip, landing neatly on his spine and pulling savagely on the gaping hole she'd created. Still holding tight, she held out his intestines, gawping at their bright, red color with the curiosity only one of her kind could possess. A tiny grin alighted on her pale, blood-speckled face.
"Pretty."
Indy nearly choked on her own spit.
Then Diny saw her.
"..." Her sibling stared back at her for a long, terrifying moment of eternity, those bright red eyes reflecting nothing, like a blank, empty pool. She glanced to her victim, back to Indy. Corpse. Indy. Her expression glazed over, becoming almost childlike as she dismounted from his back. Then she grinned and pounced.
"SISTER!"
Indy yelped!
"Wha-get off of me, you loon!"
Manwell settled down on the ledge, taking aim.
He was a good sniper, one of the best, top of his class.
He'd taken this job once he'd been discharged from the navy, if only because it was one of the only places where he had free range to shoot first, ask questions later. It certainly paid better than mercenary work. Asset out of containment? Shoot it. Rampage in the park? Shoot it. Simple, that way. Simple meant easy, and easy meant easy to kill.
This was not simple.
Today was so far beyond simple, he didn't even know what to call it anymore. One girl had let loose half of the park's exhibits already. Dinosaurs were turning into freaking people-way above his pay grade-and as if that weren't bad enough, now they had a pack of bloodthirsty raptors and some freaky alien genotype to deal with? Not to mention the walking juggernaut! Had that last missile finally taken him out?
"Command," he began slowly, fixing his scope on the girls, "I have them in my sights. Permission to shoot?"
No response, none at all.
"Command?"
Static.
Frowning, he spoke again.
"Is there anyone left on this channel?"
Nothing.
When next he looked, Ind and Diny had vanished from his scope, gone back into the thick smoke of battle. Clever Girls. He didn't know where they'd gone, but he wasn't about to stick around and find out. Anyone who could tear someone like Richard in half wasn't one he wanted to trifle with. Best to take aim at something that would die after the first round.
"Fuck it," he decided, taking aim at the raptors, "I'll just kill the little bitches instead."
A hand settled on his shoulder, cold as ice.
"Would you care to repeat that, you son of a bitch?"
"...!"
Manwell spun, snagging the pistol from its holster and slamming a shot, point blank into his attacker's stomach. Impossibly, he missed. MISSED! A grunt answered him instead and in the next instant, a fist slammed into his unprotected skull. The sudden attack spun him away from his rifle, sending him staggering to his feet. A hand snapped into his face, and he slapped it away, scything his adversary's legs out from underneath him, only for a pair of strong arms to grab and drag him down with his unknown assailant.
Tumbling in the dirt, he came face to face with his foe...
...and it wasn't who he expected.
"Owen?" he gawped. "What the fuck-
WHAP!
He got no further than that as a fist slammed up under his chin, knocking him senseless. Once. Again. Twice. Again. Three times the raptor wrangler struck him, clenched knuckles slamming into Manwell's face with a violent repetition until the man finally lost consciousness. Owen Grady stood with a grunt, rubbing his sore knuckles. Damn. Man had a face like concrete. He'd be feeling the bruises tomorrow, but he'd live. Muttering softly to himself, he dared to risk a glimpse at the raging massacre below.
"Don't shoot my raptors, man." he grumbled, tossing the rifle down the ravine.
"Technically," a new voice chimed, "They're my raptors now."
Owen groaned, cocking his head as a new figure landed beside him.
His robes ragged and tattered, covered in soot from head to toe, the horned deity shook himself mightily and spread his arms wide, as though he were welcoming an old friend. Owen wanted to shove him down into the ravine to join the rifle, but he held himself in check, if only just.
"Miss me, Star Lord?" the blond grinned.
"Oh. Great. You're still alive. And stop calling me that!"
"Disappointed?" came the challenge.
"A little, yeah."
"Whatcha gonna do about it?"
So he did the first thing that came to mind.
He punched that sonofabitch in the face.
Hard.
That smile didn't fade.
"An admirable attempt," Naruto hummed, staggering back, rubbing at his jaw, "But if its any consolation...that hurt like hell. And it wasn't very nice." he hummed, dusting himself off, "I do believe your buddy killed my favorite outfit with that missile of his earlier, and I remember telling YOU to stay out of this. So, how are you going to compensate me?"
Owen opened his mouth to answer-
Another missile arced out at them from the brush; this one Naruto redirected with thought, sending it streaking away into the park. A small mushroom cloud answered moments later. Naruto cringed, his face lit orange as a wave of heat exploded into the evening, the subsequent rush of fire giving everyone pause. Blue paused and offered a disparaging squawk of disbelief, echoed by Delta and the others.
Oops.
"Gotta watch that." the deity muttered, his face puckering in a scowl. "Collateral damage is a big no-no in my book...ah, who am I kidding. This is nothing new for me." Grady could barely find any of his own words for what he'd just seen, for what he was seeing; could only twitch as he watched the flames begin to spread across the island, unchecked. Naruto observed the unintentional blaze with the idle curiosity one might show an anthill before trampling upon it.
"How did you...
...fuck you, that's how. Killa!" Placing two fingers to his lips, he whistled sharply.
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssss!"
Scarce had he done so than a massive black shape came lurching up between them, pounding out of the smoke like a giant black, chitinous wall. Grady took one look at the beast and nearly passed away outright. What in the nine circles of hell was that?! For a terrifying beat it towered over him, looming, drooling. Oh. Acid drool. Lovely. And was that a second mouth within.
And then, Naruto spoke.
"Sick 'em."
Oh hell no...wait, what was he pointing at?
Dispassionately, Naruto reached around and indicated Manwell's prone body, his intentions clear. Killa offered a rasping chirp in response and, shouldering Owen aside, plodded over to the soldier's still form. Then, in a move as swift as savage, the xenomorph reached down, took hold of his face and with a violent twist of its thick wrists, break the shooter's neck. A violent crack resounded, then that curved, chitinous head tilted in his direction, awaiting further instruction.
"Good boy." Naruto nodded. "Back to work."
Killa uttered a chittering hiss, the closest sound to a laugh he could make, and darted back into what remained of the fray. Owen collapsed soon thereafter, his knees gone to jelly. Distantly, he heard the screams of the remaining guards, but he couldn't get the image out of his mind. That ebon terror looming over him, maw, splitting wide, exposing the tiny mouth within...ugh!
"You...bastard." he wheezed out, clutching at his hammering heart. "You absolute, insufferable...bastard."
Naruto's smug smile remained decidedly trollish, he thought, as the last of the screams died away. All that remained now was the silence, and it was into this silence that he spoke. "Whaaaat, you thought I wanted him to kill you? Why would I do that? I'd never kill someone as epic as Star Lord. I mean let's face it, you're just too awesome to kill off."
"Will you PLEASE stop-
Before he could further protest this undue treatment a pair of grey and white blurs cannoned through the smoke, slamming into the blond from behind, slamming him into the soul. Unbidden, he recognized one of them-the one in the tattered white dress-her eyes dancing like mad, amber flames. Her companion was an utter mystery to him, dark hair hiding a shy visage that seemed to take shelter in the shadow of the other. Her arms closed around Naruto in a fierce embrace, holding tightly.
"YOU'RE ALIVE!"
"Oi now, you know I don't die easily...we still have the final boss to deal with, remember?"
Indy hissed, at the thought, her eyes going slitted.
"Where is the one responsible for this?!" She demanded. "She must pay."
Owen apled.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you mean Claire? She's not-
Naruto smiled, his palm descending mercilessly on the back of the wrangler's head, sending him into the bliss of slumber. "Oops." he blinked. "My hand slipped."
"Why do we delay?!" Indy demanded. "Every second we spend here is another she could use to escape!"
"Don't worry." Naruto weathered the outburst with a small smile.
"Why?"
Impossibly, she saw his smile broaden.
"I have an old...
...friend looking after her."
Indy blinked.
"You have friends?"
"HEY!"
Claire Dearing was losing her mind.
She had to be, because the alternative was unacceptable.
BECAUSE all of her guards, friends, technicians, and coworkers had been slaughtered to a man.
By!
One!
MAN!
Simon Masrani lay facedown on the floor only yards away, drowning in a pool of his own blood. And the only thing keeping her from the same fate was this panic room and a thick sheet of security glass. She'd clamored in here when the shooting had started-shoved, really by Simon-just as all hell had broken loose. Now she was alone, staring at their dead bodies and wondering how in the hell she was going to get out of here with her body-let alone her sanity-intact.
This didn't make any sense!
How could someone, anyone, walk in with a pistol and kill everyone?!
"See," their killer chimed, wiping a bit of blood from his purple suit, "This is how we did it my day. Wham, bam, thank-you-ma'am! None of that grandstanding the younger generation seems so fond of." Approaching the glass, he raised a hand...
"Hello?" a gloved fist tapped merrily at the wall, politely knocking for admittance." Anyone in there?" the poor woman flinched slightly, cowering, as a white, pallid, bloodied face painted in a Glasgow grin thrust itself up against the glass, cackling wildly. "Come on now dear, let me in!" he catcalled, grinning malevolently. "I'm no dinosaur. I won't bite...much!"
Claire shook her head fiercely, the motion tossing her auburn hair side to side.
Her tormentor scowled
"Fine, then. We'll do this the hard way."
Irritated, he snatched up an assault rifle off the floor and opened fire, the bullets ringing harmlessly off the glass. The weapon clicked empty moments later and he tossed it away, glowering.
"Bah," came the annoyed mutter, "Kids these days, no sense of humor. None at all! So, you're the strong and silent type, eh? Think you're safe behind that glass? Give me twenty minutes and a can opener and I'll have you whimpering like a school girl. YOU MIGHT LIKE IT!"
"Oh, leave her be, Joker!"
For a moment, one blessed moment, she almost dared to hope that someone had come to rescue her. Owen, maybe. Wrong. Instead, Uzumaki Naruto rounded the corner, and she felt her blood run cold. The same man they'd caught on the camera all those years ago, flanked now by two girls she didn't recognize and...was that a smile on his face. Oh lord, it was. Everything in her quailed at the sight and she felt her heart shrivel up in an instant.
"Ah, and there he is!" The now-named "Joker" laughed merrily and spun in a chair, waving his newly acquired weapon. "And here I thought you were going to miss all the fun. C'mon now, help me cut this thing open!"
Naruto sighed. "Or we could just do...
...this."
As she looked on the blond stepped right through the wall, steel and glass sundering behind him. Matter and substance simply parted, reality itself bending away from him to create a space in the panic room. Claire did a small jump and clamored backwards, but there was nowhere to go. Nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide.
No escape.
"My bad! Introductions. Always the best part of any conversation. Name's Naruto. It rhymes with...well." He paused, blinking, touching a finger to his chin. "Come to think of it, I don't think it rhymes with anything. Ah, but I digress. I see you've met the Joker.
The Clown Prince of Crime bowed merrily.
"Tell me my dear, have you ever had a really, bad, day?" impossibly, that malevolent smile grew. "You're about to."
"You come in here, destroy our security systems-
"Disabled." The blond corrected, raising a pointed finger. "And for the record? I had nothing to do with that. Indy, now, she's to blame for your little fiasco. Suppose its what I get for letting her wander around. Leave her be for a few seconds an BOOM! Everything explodes. Sort of like that bit about the hydrogen bomb." A small explosion of confetti exploded over Claire's head even as he said this, grinning. "Not like we're jumping the shark here, " Sure enough, a miniature version of the legendary JAWS itself appeared to smack her upside the face, "We can be friends and talk this out."
An eye twitched.
Naruto couldn't help himself, he started laughing all over again!
"Ah, that never gets old! I could do this all day! Although, I feel like I've already done this shtick before...
"Stop doing that! You can't attack me with puns!"
"I'm a god, babe!" Naruto cackled, clapping his hands together happily, clasping them. His very eyes seemed to spin like mad marbles. "Puns and bullets and pointy things, oh, yes I can! I'm running the show now, and this is just the tip of the spear! Now, a riddle. I'm hot and I'm cold, if you fear me, you must never be bold. What am I?"
"Um...
"Death."
He stepped aside, and Indy stepped in to fill the gap.
Diny furtively tried to duck behind her sibling but, being a good head taller than Indy, this proved an exercise in futility. Her sibling cocked her head at Claire, regarding the woman with hooded eyes. THe sheer fury in those matchless orange-crimson orbs shook something loose in Dearing, then, loosening her tongue enough to speak.
"Um...
"Why, don't you recognize her?" Naruto inquired.
Clair could only shake her head, mute.
They deity scoffed.
"Indy?"
In an instant, she shifted.
And Claire screamed.
The Inodminus Rex towered over her with a howl, its bulk filling the room all the way to its vaulted ceiling, snarling furiously. Then she reverted, leaving the woman a gibbering wreck.
"I...you...how...
"You poked and prodded her before she was ever born, and then, when I took her away from you, you let your techs go an' do the same to her sibling. Her sister." He admonished, shaking his head like a disappointed parent. "You took that one, and made her a monster, broke her in so many ways that even I ain't sure I can fix them all. You did all this in the name of your so-called science and didn't think that this would go wrong? What's up with that, eh, doc?"
Frantic, she scrambled backwards but to no avail, the quartet had her pinned, hemmed in, away from the door. There was nowhere to go.
"Even I'm not that cruel." Joker protested. Then he paused, blinking. "Ah. Wait, I am!"
"See," he continued, leaning close, whispering conspiratorially to Claire, "This is always my favorite part...that last, fleeting second before all hell breaks loose! Any last words? No? Just a squeak? Not even a goodbye to your precious nephews?" that grin didn't diminish in the slightest. "Pity. I hear losing a member of the family is so scarring..."
Naruto sighed, pinching his nose. "Remind me why I haven't killed you again?"
"Oh, Foxy, I'm hurt!" the jester clutched at his heart in faux agony. "Think of all the good times we've had together since Origins! The buildings we've destroyed! The pranks we've played! Remember all the smiles! Face it, you'd be bored to death without me!"
...point."
"HA!"
The shot seemed to come from nowhere; one moment the Joker was laughing, the next, his hand snapped up, and she was bleeding in the arm. Pain. In her shoulder. Bullet. Shot. The words and thoughts came slowly, even as her life leaked slowly away between her fingers. Red stained white, bleaching the pristine garment scarlet.
Claire swallowed thickly as they closed in.
In one last, desperate attempt, she sought to plead her case.
"Please, you have to understand! We never meant to-
Indy struck, her arm darting out with the speed of a cobra as she latched onto the doctor's throat. Claire's voice was cut off in midword.
Before she could even register what was happening she was off the table, marching the flailing woman across the room, shoving her roughly against the wall. Claire's face was bright red; she couldn't draw air at all. She could only gape, wide-eyed, as the young woman who'd sat like a mannequin through the entire discussion erupted into violence. And then she spoke.
"Didn't mean to?" it was a hiss. "What, exactly, didn't you mean to do?! Experiment on me?! My sister?! MY FAMILY?!"
Grasping Claire's throat with one hand, she lifted the senior administrator a foot off the floor with minimal effort. Still, her mind remained frozen in horror. Her face began to turn blue, her lips drawn back in a grinning rictus, her feet kicking ineffectually against the wall. Indy was throttling her with both hands now, as she gasped and grasped and clawed at her wrists, fighting, struggling, her efforts useless. Do something! Her brain shrilled, but it was no use; with each passing second that vice tightened, fingers like iron digging into her windpipe.
Indy's eyes weren't passive slits anymore. They were wide, all-seeing, enraged, burning. The eyes of a beast, trapped in the body of a girl.
"Don't play with your food." Naruto admonished. "We're on a tight schedule."
The sound seemed to activate Claire; she struggled desperately, finally breaking Indy's hold. She fell hard and scrambled to get away but the Indominus pounced on her like a cat toying with a mouse already slated for dinner. Her long legs scissored around Claire, squeezing the air from her lungs, as she pinned her shoulders to the floor. Claire clawed the floor in a feeble attempt to escape, but Indy never noticed, just kept strangling the life out of her victim.
With the last of her strength, Claire managed to rasp:
"Stop...her...!"
Naruto's face swung into view, frowning.
"Stop her? Why?" his voice drifted to her as though through a red haze warped and distorted, her body frozen as she watched him place the explosives around the command console. "You deserve this. You always have. Don't worry; you're nephews get to live. You should be happy! Oh, wait-
Distantly, she heard something snap.
"Goodbye, Claire."
Even then, she didn't die.
Not immediately.
"Well, that was fun." Naruto hummed. "Very cathartic. I think we're all satisfied, here."
"I want ice cream."
"Ah, and so Diny speaks!"
The last thing she heard was a distant conversation, helpless as the life bled away from her. She saw booted feet walking away, detected a distant, relieved sigh. Indy clamored off her, spitting. Somewhere over the din of everything exploding, she'd just be able to make out a few last words, snatches laughter leaking through her ears.
"Ice cream it is!"
And then everything went black.
(Three weeks later...)
"Oh, I've got an idea~!"
"I do not see the point of that." Indy sighed, looking up from her clawed fingers, uncaring as the the deadly razors shifted back to harmless human nails once more, "What could you possibly mean by-what you doing with my egg?" Amber eyes watched him intently, never once leaving the prize in his hands. She was wholly protective of her clutch, every one of them Naruto knew; just as he knew she was going to bite his head off if he didn't explain himself posthaste.
Diny perked up, only to duck under the table at her sibling's venemous expression.
"Now wait just a second! Don't get all bitey!"
Pearly whites flashed. "Explain yourself."
Her offspring held limitless possibilities; even she herself admitted she didn't truly know what would hatch from the tiny cluster she'd spawned. Naruto's DNA, melded with hers...even a god such as him couldn't predict something like that.
"C'mon, its just one egg. I thought I'd go poking around with it."
"'Tis my egg." she hissed. "One. Of. Our. Children. Unhand it."
"Reading Shakespeare again, huh?" When her leer didn't abate he deflated with a sigh. "Look, if its that important to you, I'll just conjure up another one from your DNA. After all, we have to do SOMETHING with it. Its not like we could-oh."
"Oh? Oh, what?"
Naruto simply grinned. "I've an idea."
"You already said that."
"Libel! How would you like to meet me when I was first starting out?"
Her head tilted. "I do not see the appeal. I like you as you are; not some powerless weakling. Why would I wish to meet an alternate version of you?"
"I'll take you to my favorite hunting grounds~! Ever heard of the Forest of Death?"
The queen's head whipped around so swiftly he was certain she'd given herself whiplash.
Her eyes sparkled like diamonds in the sky.
"Truly?!"
And thus, a new adventure began.
A/N: THE RESULTS ARE IN! DINY LIVES! THIS CHAPTER IS THE LAST ONE! THANK YOU ALL FOR ENJOYING THIS LONG, WONDERFUL RIDE WITH ME!
Aye, this is a short series primarily to show how Naruto both met and "tamed" if you will, Indominus Rex, who will appear later on during his travels. Of course we all know she's a savage beast, but I like to think that she's misunderstood because of her horrible upbringing...just a little...
So...in the Immortal Words of Atlas...
...Review, Would You Kindly? Hope you enjoyed the story! Hope it made ya grin! AND HERE BE A PREVIEW FOR ANOTHER STORY! THE MARVELOUS MISADVENTURES OF DINY AND INDY! THIS'LL BE A REALITY IF YA'LL WANT TO SEE IT! THAR BE THREEEEEEE!
(Preview)
Indy blinked, admiring the gold band on her finger with some trepidation.
"Why did you give me this ring? I fail to see the purpose of such a device. Why does it go on my finger?" Naruto sighed, rubbing his face. He'd taken to doing that a lot lately. He was still alpha, but there had been a bit of a disconnect between them as of late. Less and less she saw him as father, and more as leader. Commander. Mate. More and more she enjoyed strange things, physical things; things such as sitting near him, letting him massage her shoulders, letting him TOUCH her, wanting to BE touched...
She didn't understand these urges. They baffled her so.
So did the ring."
"Ugh...you really are lost when it comes to human customs, ain'tcha?" Holding up his own hand, he slid another, matching band onto it. "Look, see? We match. I gave you the ring BECAUSE in human customs, a ring is a sign of marriage. Remember that word? Its when two people pledge themselves to each other and-
Her heart lurched.
"What did you just sa-
"Oooh, shiny~!"
"Diny, don't you DARE!"
Killa thrust a dark, pointed finger.
The very motion seemed to say:
"There."
Indy's jaw nearly dropped as she followed the lone digit, all the way to the sniffling figure on the sidewalk.
"...Diny."
Her sibling blinked, large red eyes fluttering open and shut. She'd tried, countless times, to impress the importances of appearances upon her sister. At least in public. This...this was not that. People were staring, and she could feel her face growing increasingly hot as she watched Diny continue to toy with the paper clip she'd discovered. Diny, as she'd discovered, was near impossible to control when Naruto was absent, but this, it took the cake, ate it, and spat it back out!
"Where did your clothes go?" she asked, twitching. Was she still sulking because of the ring? Was that the reason?
Scarlet orbs flitted up mournfully.
"I...lost them."
"HOW DO YOU LOSE SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!"
Diny promptly broke down in tears.
"I'm sorry!"
"Gah, there, there..." The elder of the pair groaned, desperately trying to console her sister.
"Oh, great spirits preserve me...
Diny cocked her head considering, ebon tresses bouncing from the motion.
Why she was fascinated with it was beyond him, such things were the mysteries of the universe. It was a tiny little Maltese, no bigger than the size of her hand. One look at the shining orbs and he knew she was lost, all but enamored by the tiny little creature.
"Mine." she decided at last.
Naruto sighed. "Diny, that is a puppy. You cannot have a puppy. You will EAT it when I'm not looking."
"Sugar."
"Ha?"
"Her NAME is Sugar."
"Well, that's very nice, but you can't-
Her glare intensified as she clutched the little ball of fluff to her chest.
"MINE."
Ja ne~!
R&R~! =D