Eight tried to be inconspicuous as she entered the gallery but she couldn't help feeling out of place. She had only just arrived and at least half a dozen couples had passed her by already. Were she just passing through or running errands she wouldn't be bothered, but she was here for a different reason: she was here to observe.
Taking Pearl's advice, Eight looked up the most popular dating spots in Inkopolis and had chosen the location closest to where they lived, a place she could visit often. As it turned out, it wasn't far from Inkopolis Square. In fact, it was the oldest shopping gallery in the city, recently revitalized thanks to the square's activity. Now that she was here, she could already feel the difference in atmosphere.
In Inkopolis Square, the feel of the place was one of excitement, tension, and urgency. This gallery lacked the tension altogether, being more a place of merriment and comfortable routine, much more relaxed. There was also the fact that many of the people here were walking hand in hand.
One girl had her arm tightly around that of a boy as she leaned against him while they walked, her mantle radiating bright pinks and reds. Another couple sat on a bench, looking anywhere but at each other even as they held hands. The girl's face was so brightly flushed Eight thought she might explode.
I know that feeling. Eight thought with a sigh. She tried to find a central location where she could sit and observe without being too conspicuous. She found a sitting area with parasols at each table. She bought a drink and took a seat facing what appeared to be the densest concentration of couples, filling up what the sign above called an arcade. She was close enough that she could actually hear some of what they were saying and that helped her better understand the mechanics at play.
One girl looked bored and annoyed as her date tried and failed again and again at a crane game, trying to win her a prize inside. Eight had seen similar contraptions down in the metro and hadn't understood what they were at the time.
Nearby, a group of girls watched a group of boys playing one of the games, fighting and straining to get the high score. In contrast to the first girl, these were cheering the boys on, looking genuinely excited even as the boys yelled and cursed at each other to reach their goal. Eight smiled a little, finding the scene amusing.
There were interesting things to observe elsewhere too. Young mothers walked with their broods, showing them off proudly as young inkyora flocked to them, stopping to admire and fawn over their little children. An inkyar standing in the middle of the nearby intersection was himself being swarmed as half a dozen inkyora, each one vying for his attention with bright colours in their mantles until any looked at each other and their colours changed to darker more aggressive ones. Were they competing for him?
"Gold for your thoughts?"
Eight jumped and snappd to her left to see Four's grinning face.
Eight sighed. "You surprised me."
Four laughed and sat across the small round table from her, setting her turf war gear on the ground beside her. "Sorry. I honestly didn't expect to run into you here of all places. It's kinda' out of the way from where you live."
"There is a gallery and shopping centre I typically go to that is a little closer," Eight admitted. "As I recall, we have run into each other there before."
Four frowned. "Did we? I don't remember."
"You were feeling quite down at the time. I'm not surprised you don't remember."
"Oh…," Four's expression fell and she looked away for a moment. Her mantle turned to a deep blue and wavy patterns of crimson throbbed.
Pain? Eight wondered. It was the first thing that came to mind upon seeing that.
Four shook her head clear and readopted her smile, her mantle returning to its regular yellow-orange colour. "So, what are you doing here?
Eight winced and stared down at her drink, still untouched. "I'm… observing. Pearl said I should observe real couples instead of just fictional ones."
"Ah," Four nodded. "Yeah, this is a pretty popular dating spot. I see new couples and broken couples every time I come through here."
Eight frowned. "You come through here often?"
"Sure. I live North of the square so I pass through here back and forth every time. Well, except when it's closed, of course." She grinned but Eight ignored her little jest.
"So, you see many examples of couples every day." Eight looked back at the arcade and the couples within. The boys were still trying for the high score and the one girl had finally dragged her boyfriend away from the claw machine before he wasted all his money. "I suppose Three and I really do not act like a couple, do we?"
Four sighed. "Eight, you're not really a couple yet. You're in the stage where you're… trying to become a couple. Even though you both know how the other feels, it's like you're afraid to take the next step. I mean, I know you were friends and I know you trust each other but you two really didn't know each other that well. That's why you're so nervous moving forward."
"So people keep saying." Eight rested her chin on her hand, still staring out towards the arcade. "Did I make a mistake?"
"Maybe, but you can't take it back now and I talked with Three; she really wants to make this work if it can. It's just that… well, she's dealing with a lot of stuff right now and you haven't been yourself lately."
Eight frowned and sat up, looking directly at Four. "Have I not?"
Four crossed her arms, her mantle turning a violet-red. "No. Sure you smile a bit but you don't seem as energetic and happy as you were before. I mean, I know the magic of living on the surface is gonna wear off eventually but the last little while it seems you've kinda' forgotten all about that."
Eight grimaced, looking back down into her cup, fidgeting slightly. "I... I suppose my mind has been somewhat occupied by other things, lately."
Four's mantle flashed blue. "Is Three all you've been thinking about?"
Eight opened her mouth to respond but no sounds emerged. She slowly closed it shut and her tentacles curled back, exposing their undersides. "I admit she has dominated my thoughts."
Four gave her a small smile. "It's normal when you're in love, but why don't you and Three go out and do stuff? I know you're busy but you're not that busy. Sparring and turf war is fine but you should do stuff more… well, like what couples do." She nodded towards the arcade. "Give Three a chance to maybe win you a plushie."
Eight followed her gaze back to the arcade and at the infernal claw machine, imagining Three trying to win one of the toys inside for her.
"Somehow, I think the machine would not survive the confrontation."
Four laughed uproariously. It actually took her a little bit to settle back down and respond. "Yeah, probably right. But claw machines are evil anyway, so think of it as your duty as an agent to rid the city of it. I'm sure she'd see it that way."
Eight couldn't help but smile. "Maybe. It's just-." She bit her bottom lip, stopping herself from going on. Four raised a suspicious eyebrow then glanced down at Eight's drink and leaned back in her chair.
"Say, you wanna come to my place? I know you're people watching right now but it just looks like you're making yourself depressed. Like you're looking at all these couples and feeling like yours isn't anything great."
Eight winced. Four was right. She had come out here to observe but while it was interesting, she couldn't help but compare her and Three's relationship to all these couples and realize how short it came up.
"I suppose I should."
"Yeah, you should." Four stood and grabbed her gear. "Come on. We'll order some takeout when we get there.'
Eight picked up her drink, still untouched, and followed alongside Four as she led her out of the gallery.
Four's apartment was a half-hour walk from the gallery. It was a three-story, low-rise, rectangular structure with the short side facing the street. A back lane filled the gap between it and the next building, providing just enough room for a truck to squeeze through. On this face were the doorways of each apartment with balconies on the opposite side. Unlike the condos of Pearl and Marina's building, the stairs were on the outside, one stairway at the two corners.
It suddenly dawned on Eight that this was the first time she was entering the home of someone who wasn't a celebrity - Cuttlefish Cabin aside. Pearl and Marina's penthouse, Callie and Marie's bungalow, both were beyond the means of the average inkling.
They walked up the green, metal stairs to the third floor. She could hear music blaring in one of the suites below and she grimaced at the thought of being in a building without adequate soundproofing when having such noisy neighbours.
Four unlocked her door and Eight took a deep calming breath before she followed her inside.
It was even more humble than she expected. Four's kitchen was a mere alcove in the wall just beyond the porch. One would have to stand in the hallway while making food and there was less counter space than the penthouse's kitchen island alone and it was covered in dirty plates, bowls, and utensils.
"Sorry about the mess," Four said with an apologetic smile. "Make yourself at home."
Eight said nothing; she didn't trust her mouth at the moment. Stepping beyond the porch and sliding door closets opposite the kitchen, she followed Four to the main room. It was surprisingly dark. Although her eyes quickly adjusted, it was obvious that the apartment didn't get much sunlight with tall buildings in front and behind it. The only window was the sliding glass door leading onto the balcony.
I really am spoiled. Eight thought- a thought she would not have had a few months ago. Compared to her old barracks or the metro, even Four's humble apartment was luxurious; although, perhaps less so in its current state.
The main room was a complete mess. Dirty clothes, discarded food wrappers, and other items littered the floor. The small bed was unmade, it's blankets half lying on the dirty floor, and a small square table in the middle of the room had half a dozen dirty glasses and plates on it. The room smelled too.
Four reached up and pulled a small metal chain dangling from the ceiling, turning on the lights attached to the underside of a ceiling fan. She casually placed her gear in the corner of the room and sat at the table.
"What a long morning," she said with a yawn. "There were some good teams out."
"At least it's good practice," Eight said, sweeping aside some debris with her foot to make room for herself at the table.
"I guess. At least I managed to avoid getting splatted. Marie gives me fire every time I slip."
"It's because she cares."
"I know," Four sighed. "My Dad once said that you know someone loves you or at least cares about you if they nag you a lot. I'm not sure how much I believe that but it seems to fit Marie."
"Nag you?" Eight asked.
"Yeah, like, how Marie and Three are always telling me to be patient or avoid getting splatted in turf war so I don't develop bad habits. I don't need the constant reminders but they give 'em anyway."
"Ah, I think I see." Eight said. "Pearl is always telling me I need to be more assertive."
"With Three? Yeah, you should be."
Eight shook her head. "No, I do not think-, it is just… I do not know if Three would respond well to that. Our relationship seems to be on unstable ground as it is."
"So, you're afraid to make a move?"
Eight shrank. "I suppose."
"But there's more to it, right?"
Eight shrank again and she averted her eyes from Four. How did she know?
She heard Four sigh. "Eight, did you think we wouldn't notice how Three is the only person you don't seem to talk normally around? You talk way more naturally with me, Pearl, and Marina, but Three, the girl you're actually into, you talk almost like she's a strict aunt or something. Three thinks you might even be afraid of her."
Eight stiffened, now looking right back at Four. "She does? But why? I admit, I used to be afraid of her but-"
Four put up her hands. "Look, I know Three hasn't been doing the best job either but you are kinda' sending her mixed signals. You're the one who came out to her and, yeah she gave you kind of a half-baked answer but at least it was an honest one. She really does want this thing to work out but she doesn't know if or how. I mean, it even feels like you and me are closer than you and her are."
That stung and it made Eight wince visibly; she couldn't deny it. However, Four wasn't kept up late at night with impure thoughts of Three tenderly dominating her, she didn't have to deal with the odd yet powerful urges to inhale Three's scent, to know what her lips felt like on hers, to try on the other girl's clothes for no reason other than to have something on her skin that had been on Three's.
Four reached her hands across the table to grasp Eight's, holding them firmly. Their eyes met and Eight could see the intensity behind those yellow-orange orbs and a firmness of intent to help. Eight couldn't stop herself from shifting uncomfortably.
"Eight," Four said firmly. "I can tell it's eating you up. Aren't I your best friend? Can't you tell me what's wrong? You were so full of life before and you even went on the attack with Three, but now it's like all that spunk went up in smoke."
Eight felt a stab of guilt. It was true, she hadn't felt like herself lately, hadn't been herself.
Four went on.
"And, Three has been pretty worried. After all, when you confessed, she said that she liked you, even if she didn't know how much. Now, that girl she liked is nowhere to be seen. How do you think she feels about that?"
The knife of guilt twisted. Three had noticed? She was worried?
"What do I do? If I do not change myself back- no, return to normal, then Three might refuse me!"
"Dump you," Four corrected gently. "But yeah, maybe. Honestly, I'd like you to get back to normal too. Nobody likes seeing their best friend so glum. You were mostly okay the last time we hung out but it feels like you've kept slipping."
Eight's shoulders sagged and she nodded solemnly. "I have."
"Look, if you can't tell me what's wrong, can you at least tell me what's been on your mind?"
Eight looked at her, into those eyes. The earnestness in them was nearly heartbreaking. She wanted to tell her everything, disgorge all her feelings of confusion and others she didn't understand. But she had barely any context herself. How was she even supposed to explain it to Four?
Wetting her lips with her tongue, Eight straightened. She would start simple.
"After I confessed to Three, I was very excited. As I said before, it was a challenge, one I thought would be fun- it still is. But that's on Three's side. For myself, there are… difficulties. I do not understand them and I am not certain how to explain."
Four frowned deeply and leaned forward to rest her arms on the table. "What kind of difficulties?"
"At the start, it was simply knowing what it was to be a girlfriend, or perhaps, more accurately, how to court Three into accepting me, as such. I did a lot of research, watching TV, looking up advice online, and reading magazine articles I thought applicable."
Four's face warped in a painful grimace and Eight felt heat rise to her face, knowing what she was thinking. "Th-that is why Pearl told me to watch real couples today."
"Yeah, kinda hard to be an expert in something with no manual just by reading about it," Four said.
Eight nodded slowly. "Yes, I have started to realize that. I admit it became something of an obsession." She swallowed hard. "Three became something of an obsession."
Four nodded, flashing green, but said nothing, waiting for her to continue.
"I think that is when I started experiencing strange… compulsions?" She said the last word uncertainly. Her knowledge of Inklish was being stretched.
"Compulsions?" Four asked, puzzled.
"I do not know if that is the correct word," she said. "But it… makes me feel strange things and have odd desires regarding Three."
Four raised an eyebrow, not in confusion, but curiosity, and Eight thought that perhaps she saw a glint of amusement in the inkling's eyes. Eight didn't understand what was so amusing.
"What kind of odd desires?" She asked. Her voice with that soft, knowing tone was like fingers digging into Eight's side, coercing her into revealing her secrets.
"I…" She felt her face heating up and she found she couldn't look Four in the eye. Then she heard a noise.
It started out as a wheeze, then a giggle, then it graduated into a chuckle and then Four burst, laughed uproariously, falling onto her back in a crash of old wrappers and pizza boxes.
Eight stared at her, lips tight, and incensed. "Four, this is not amusing!" But the inkling kept laughing, her face blue as she started to run out of breath and clutched her sides. It was almost another full minute before she sat upright again, wiping tears from her eyes.
"I can't believe that's what you were worried about."
Eight's arms and tentacles were crossed and she gared across the table at Four, not the least bit amused. "You think you understand what has been affecting me?"
"What? That you've been having spicy dreams about Three? That you've had the urge to hug her and kiss her? Come on, Eight, that's normal."
"I… I can understand that. I know the desire to kiss and having dreams about the one you love is normal," Eight said a little angrily. "However, my dreams lately have been… wrong, and it's other urges I have that confuse me."
"Like what? Are you sure these weird things aren't just because of all the research you've been doing into dating and romance and stuff?"
Eight pursed her lips. She had considered that but she didn't recall any of her sources mentioning a desire to wear her love's shirts or take in deep breaths filled with their scent. Still, the results of watching My Girlfriend Keeps Growing Curvier were obvious so she couldn't totally discount it.
"I suppose that might be part of it," she admitted.
One corner of Four's mouth pulled back and down. She rested her cheek on her hand then asked, "So what have you actually been doing?"
Eight blinked. "Pardon?"
"You've been doing all this research but have you been doing anything with it?"
Eight's mind blanked. Nothing came to her, at least not at first. She traced her memory back, trying to think of what it was she had done with the knowledge she had gained.
"Well, we did start sparring together… no, that was Three's idea. I guess I did make her lunch."
Four smacked herself in the face with her hand and dragged it down. "You confessed to her a month ago, you've been doing all this research on romance and stuff; and all you've done is make her a sandwich?" Four was incredulous.
"They were fish balls," Eight said defensively. "With carrot slices and a tart."
"A month, Eight." Four said more forcefully. "A month and you haven't done anything. You've been doing all this research and Three has been waiting and you've done nothing! That's not like you at all."
Eight slammed both fists on the table, clattering the plates and causing some of the glasses to fall over.
"You don't know what it's like!" Eight shouted in Octese. "You don't know how it is to grow up without knowing anything of romance and the only love you know is from your mother and the nurses that raised you for three years after you were taken away from her at the age of two. Their love was all we had to remember and fraternization is frowned upon in the army. It was never talked about, never spoken of, it was practically taboo! You have no idea how frightening it is to experience these feelings for the first time, the pressure and anxieties that come with wanting to be with someone else, feelings you have no context for.
"I spent so much time doing research because I knew that Three deserved to be treated properly. I wanted to do things right. I didn't know what to do and all the advice everyone gave me seemed so vague. Nobody told me what rules I was supposed to follow, nobody told me what steps to take, and Three is so difficult to read and she won't tell me anything about herself and and…." Eight gritted her teeth and then smacked a pile of trash next to her, sending it spraying away. "It makes me so angry!"
Four pounded her own fist on the table. "You're totally right. Three is always so aloof, happy to listen to other people's secrets and about their lives but won't talk about her own. Thinks she has to be cool and mysterious or something. Even Callie and Marie only know about her family because they caught her at a bad time. It slipped out."
Eight agreed. "She says she trusts us with her life but won't tell us much about herself, about her interests or hobbies, the kind of music she like that isn't the Squid Sisters. How am I supposed to get to know her better if she refuses to tell me anything?"
"She acts like the big sister, always nagging me about acting this way and that way and how an agent should act, but it's like that's the only life she lives. It's like she wants everyone to think the agent part is the only part of her and that the real her doesn't exist outside of her house."
"She said she liked me but only recently did I even get a hint that she really does. How am I supposed to be encouraged by that? I sent her that poem I wrote while you were all on vacation. Do you know how she replied? She said, 'nice poem', and that was it!"
Both girls sat, panting lightly, throats raw from the yelling. Their eyes remained fixated on each other, unwavering, halfway glaring. But then, Four managed a small smile and she settled back down.
"This is the first time I've heard you be angry at Three," she said in Inklish.
Eight exhaled deeply. "It is not the first time I have felt angry."
Four's mantle flashed grey. "Three may be dumb at times and really frustrating but she does care. She's just… dealing with a lot of other stuff right now too, what with the new siblings coming and all."
Eight nodded. "I suppose I am not guiltless either." She shook her head, feeling very foolish. "I became so focused on my research and trying to be perfect that I forgot about Three herself."
"Huh, I guess so." Four tapped her chin. "So what are you gonna' do now?"
"I do not know."
Four smiled. "Maybe what you really need is a refresh. Something to clear your head. Maybe you haven't been yourself because there's no room for you in that head of yours."
Eight looked uncertain but at this point she seriously needed to think of ways to get out of this bad mental place she had gotten herself into.
"What are you proposing?"
"A sleepover! You can crash here at my place and get a change of scenery. We'll stay up and watch some of your romance stuff and we can talk about it. Not like a serious discussion, just chilling and laughing together - a girls night. Maybe you'll find that some of this stuff you've been worried about isn't as big a deal as you think it is or maybe you just need to let it out."
Eight took a deep breath and let it out slowly. It did seem nice and sleepovers did seem fun when she saw them on TV. She could use a change in her routine. Pearl and Marina would probably allow her one night.
"Alright," she said. "On one condition."
Four frowned, watching her as she stood up and stepped back. "What?"
Eight took out her phone and snapped a picture. Four blinked from the flash. "What's that for?"
Eight swept her hand in front of her. "If we're having a sleepover, we have to clean up this mess."
Four pouted like a child, her mantle turning a dark brown colour. "We can just… shove some stuff out of the way-."
"If you refuse to clean-," Eight interrupted, turning her phone around to show Four the picture she took. "-Then I'll send this to Marie."
All colour drained from Four, her face and mantle turning a deathly white.
"You wouldn't."
Eight grinned smugly. "I would, because I care."
Four leaned back, groaning loudly. "Fine, fine, we can clean up." She grumbled. "Just can't stop being a maid, can you?"
"No more than I can stop being your friend."
Four chuckled despite herself. "Fine. I'd rather deal with this mess than Marie, but before we start, let's order lunch. I'm starving."
Four took out her phone and started dialing while Eight gathered up the dishes and carried them to the kitchen. The countertop was so filthy that it actually smelled. It was a wonder Four wasn't sick.
Thinking back to their conversation - argument really, she decided that Four was right. She wasn't herself, she wasn't being the girl Three had initially fallen in love with. She wasn't the person she herself wanted to be.
"I need to find myself again." She whispered to herself. The Wisdoms said that knowing a problem was half the battle, but that didn't mean it was the easiest. How would she go about finding herself again? Could she do so in time to still win Three's hearts?
Author'sNotes:
A true friend tells you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. I like to think Four is a good friend to our little Eight. But next time, it's Three's turn.