Chapter 4

Earlier, in the theatre…

Karen didn't know how long Jim was gone before she was able to divide her attention from the movie enough to realize it. She texted him, asking where he was, and focused on the movie another few minutes without receiving a reply. She turned to Andy beside her, noticed for the first time Pam was not at his other side.

"Hey," she whispered. "Where's Pam?"

Andy shrugged. "Bathroom. Concession stand. I don't know." Their conversation continued in urgent whispers.

"Jim's been gone too, for fifteen or twenty minutes."

Andy glanced to Karen's left, like he needed to confirm what she'd said.

"They're together, aren't they?" she asked, and Andy saw her eyes had begun to water.

"Maybe. So what?" He chose for her sake to misinterpret her meaning. "They're probably both in line for popcorn."

She shook her head. "I know what you and Pam are doing, that you two are trying to get Jim back for his prank. So stop bullshitting me and tell me if Pam is trying to make Jim jealous, if she wants him for herself."

"The thought occurred to me. Jim seems like too much of a Boy Scout to actually cheat on you though."

"But there's something going on between them, and I think it's more than friendship. Haven't you noticed how they've been looking at each other the past two days? You don't look at your friends that way."

"Well what do you want to do? Find them and confront them? You go ahead; I'm watching the movie."

She grabbed his arm, holding it tightly with a surprisingly strong hand. Andy glanced down at it, then met her eyes, hurt and anger glittering there in the light of the flickering screen. He and Karen had been friends a long time. He cared about her, didn't want to see her hurt. His suspicions about Pam's motives suddenly didn't seem so off base now. Pam's actions with him-the orange sucking and tonight's making out that had given him a raging hard on in spite of himself (he'd been in a sexual slump lately), now seemed too calculated not to illicit a jealous response from Jim. And now the two of them had disappeared, together? Andy wasn't angered by this exactly—he'd willingly signed up, after all—but it annoyed him that she probably wasn't being honest with him about what she'd really hoped to accomplish by their ruse. More importantly, if she was really after Jim, there went his chance to convince her that going back to his apartment for a little fun wouldn't hurt anything, would just add to the realism of their performance.

He sighed. "Text him and tell him we're leaving. See what comes of that. If he responds right away, if they come back with an innocent explanation, then we know. If not, well I'll take you home and to hell with both of them, okay?"

"Okay," she said. "You text Pam too."

"I don't have her number," he said, frowning at the realization. He was beginning to feel like the chump in all this, even though Pam had made it clear it was all just a prank.

Karen had sent her second text and stared blindly now at the movie. Her mind was racing, and the feeling she'd tried to suppress about Jim and Pam could no longer be denied. He'd kept things from her, and she was starting to realize that she'd totally changed her life, moved here, for a man who'd also been lying to himself.

She gave him five minutes to answer. "Let's go," she said bitterly, fighting tears again. Anger was quickly overshadowing the hurt.

Andy didn't hesitate, and they left the theatre, leaving the coats of their betrayers where they'd left them.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Later…

It had taken all Jim's self-control to stop kissing Pam at her apartment door, not to yield to temptation and follow her inside. It all seemed so surreal, like he was living out his every fantasy at last. His blood was pumping hotly through his veins, his body responding to hers like a starving man at a banquet. But he'd already made enough mistakes; he didn't want to add sexual betrayal to his crimes against Karen.

So, he kissed Pam one last time, told her he loved her, and once she was safely inside her apartment, he walked stiffly back to his car. He drove with the window open to the cold night air to help calm himself, so by the time he arrived at the Day's Inn, he had regained most of his self-control. Now, he turned off the engine with an acute sense of dread. Karen didn't deserve what he was about to do, and he was prepared to accept all the yelling and lambasting he knew he deserved. He hoped she didn't cry though, because that would be the worst.

On his way to the lobby door, he passed a familiar Toyota hybrid—the NardDog vanity plate confirming his suspicions: Andy was still here with her.

Great, he thought. He really hadn't wanted the added awkwardness of breaking up with Karen in front of an audience, especially not Andy Bernard. Not to mention the fact that Andy wasn't exactly his favorite person right now, given how he'd been all over Pam the past couple of days.

Jim took the elevator to the second floor and walked with a heavy heart to Karen's door. He'd been there many times over the past few weeks, and he recalled with a guilty twinge the nights he'd spent buried deep inside of her, using her to forget the one he'd really loved. He'd been a grade-A asshole, and he wasn't proud of himself in the least.

He knocked on the door, and Andy answered almost immediately.

"Hey, man," said Jim. He looked past Andy to see Karen sitting on the queen-size bed.

"Hey. Sorry we gave you the slip, but Karen wasn't feeling well. Come on in. I'll give you two lovebirds some privacy."

Jim's eyes widened at that. He'd expected an altogether different reception.

"Oh. Uh. Thanks."

When the door closed behind Andy, Jim moved into the small hotel room. She'd been looking for an apartment, but hadn't had much luck, and he knew she hated it here.

"Are you okay," he asked her tentatively, waiting for the other shoe to drop. That last text about him and Pam had sounded angry, sarcastic. He'd been mentally preparing for a major set down.

She smiled. "Yeah. Sorry we left. I figured you and Pam were hashing out the prank within a prank thing, so when you didn't answer my text, Andy kindly took me home."

"I'm sorry. Yeah, we were. My phone was on vibrate from the movie and I…" He trailed off, examining her benign expression, trying to recalibrate. "So, you're not mad at me? I know we were gone a long time."

She shrugged. "I was involved with the movie. I started feeling sick so I will accept a raincheck of you taking me back to watch the ending sometime. I really hope Bond gets the girl in the end."

Jim shook his head. His head was spinning, and he was starting to feel a little sick himself. Seriously? What the fuck? His stomach dropped suddenly as he realized how infinitely more complicated this had all become. Karen apparently wasn't mad at him. She didn't act like she suspected something was going on between him and Pam. Plus, she was sick. He thought of Pam at home in her apartment, waiting for him to return a free man. Breaking up with Karen wasn't going to be just a formality now.

Jesus.

He ran an agitated hand through his hair.

"You want a drink?" Karen was asking him, nodding toward the small refrigerator where he knew there was a stocked mini bar inside. He and Karen had partaken many times over the past month, laughingly pouring tiny bottles of wine into plastic hotel cups. They'd mostly been naked in bed those times. He briefly closed his eyes, trying to block out those images that just added to his guilt.

"No thanks," he said automatically. "Can I get you anything?"

She shook her head, then smiled a little mysteriously. "I'd better not." She patted the bed beside her. "You gonna stand over there all night, Halpert? Take off your coat and come sit by me."

He complied reluctantly, but it gave his hands something to do, gave him time to stall.

He tossed his coat over a nearby chair, and took his place beside her. He reached for her hand, cool in his even colder one. He was nervous and filled with dread as he looked at her, admiring her lightly freckled, olive complexion, her exotic eyes, her chic haircut. She was such a great person—funny, smart, beautiful-a real catch, as his mom would say. And he could tell she really liked him, maybe even wanted things to become less casual between them. How was he supposed to do this to her?

"I've been meaning to talk to you about something for a few days," she said, before he could take a breath to speak.

"Oh?" He desperately jumped at the reprieve.

"Yeah. I guess there's no easy way to say this, but…well, I'm late."

"Late for what?"

She stared at him patiently a moment, willing him to stop being so obtuse. When it finally sank in, his eyes widened, and his jaw actually dropped. His mouth went dry, and he cleared his throat before he finally managed a broken croak: "Late, late. As in, you're—"

"Maybe," she said. "I don't know. I'm about a week past my usual time, and I've been feeling kinda weird."

Jim thought his head might explode with an overload of too much information, too many implications to process.

"But, we've uh, used a condom, every time," he insisted.

"Those things aren't one-hundred percent, Halpert. Don't you remember your high school health class? And besides, the first couple times we did it, a condom was all we used. I was just so caught up in the moment, I took a stupid risk."

He stood abruptly then, pacing in agitation for the second time that night.

"Have you taken a test?" he asked, the obvious question slow to come to his addled brain.

"Not yet. I figured I'd give it a few more days. I mean, maybe the stress of moving, starting a new job has messed up my cycle."

"Is it too soon to take it? I mean, I'll run out and buy you one right now—"

"I don't know. I've never had to take a pregnancy test before. I'd really rather just give it some more time before we freak out. More than likely, I'm not."

A wave of anger washed over him at her words. "Jesus, Karen, if that's what you think, why tell me now? Why not wait until you're sure?"

She met his outburst with a flash of her own annoyance. "I don't know, Jim," she began sarcastically. "Considering this concerns you equally as much as it does me, I thought you deserved to share in the worry I'm going through, just like you might have to share in a lot more if I am pregnant." Her hands dropped unconsciously to her flat stomach, and his eyes followed the movement. He felt immediately contrite, and he sat down heavily on the bed beside her, took her hand again.

"You're right, I'm sorry. Of course. No matter what happens, you're not alone in this, okay?"

But unbidden came the memory of only minutes before, when he was kissing Pam outside her apartment door. God, what was he going to tell Pam? She was waiting for him to return to her a free man, with no obstacles between them at long last. If Karen really was—he couldn't even think the word—well, how could he expect Pam to want to stay with him when he had that kind of responsibility?

He stiffened when he felt Karen lean her head against his shoulder.

"I'm glad to hear that. If nothing changes, I'll take the test in a few days, I promise. Can you hold on that long?"

"Days?" he asked. Hell, he didn't know how he was going to get through the next few minutes.

"I want to be sure the test is accurate. I'll do some research though, see for sure when the best time is."

He swallowed hard, felt the beginnings of frustrated tears. "I think I'll have that drink now," he said, going to the fridge and grabbing two small bottles of vodka.

He left twenty minutes later, passed Andy in the small hotel lounge, nursing a glass of scotch. He didn't stop to chat, but simply nodded and went on his dazed, slightly tipsy way. He thought of calling Pam, but couldn't bring himself to do it, didn't know how the hell he could tell her this right now. He sat in his cold car, not bothering to start it and get the heater running. He needed a few minutes to try to think.

What he really wanted to do was drive to the nearest drug store and buy a damned test, take it back to Karen and force her to pee on the damn stick or whatever she had to do. Not knowing was far worse than knowing, even if the answer was positive. At least if Karen were pregnant, he could begin to plan his life. Now, he was stuck in a holding pattern with both women. He certainly hadn't broken up with Karen tonight, not on top of her news, and he couldn't bring himself to pressure her into taking the test before she wanted to. For one thing, he didn't think it would be good for her to be upset if she was carrying his child.

Holy shit! His child!

And then there was Pam. Pam. She loved him. She'd actually said it. Despite the conversation he'd just had with Karen, knowing Pam loved him made his heart flip over with an almost overwhelming joy. And she'd kissed him, given him hope for their future together. But despite all that, things seemed so tentative, so…delicate. Was their new love strong enough to survive the challenge of another woman bearing his child? He honestly didn't know.

He rested his forehead on the steering wheel until the cold began to seep into his bones, his mind tumbling all over itself with contradictory thoughts and extreme emotions until he wanted to scream aloud.

"Pull yourself together, Halpert," he said instead into the empty car. And so he drove back to his own apartment, trudged up the stairs, unlocked his door and lay in the center of his bed, fully clothed, shell shocked. Sometime in the wee hours, he must have fallen asleep from sheer mental exhaustion, and since he'd forgotten to take his phone off vibrate again, he'd missed Pam's texts.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

After Andy saw Jim leave the hotel, he made his way back up to Karen's room. She let him in, looking grim.

"Boy, Big Tuna looked like a big zombie on his way out."

"Yeah, he was pretty shocked. I almost had second thoughts. Almost. But I wasn't lying, you know. I am late. But I'm not worried. My cycle isn't that regular, and I have been under stress lately about the move and the new job. I'm sure my period will start in a day or two."

Andy held up his hands. "Okay, that's about all I ever wanted to know about your lady times. How long do you plan to torture the guy?"

"I think a few days is actually a small price to pay for how I've turned my life upside down for him, for how I suspect he's lied to me all these weeks about his true feelings for Pam. Besides," she said with an ironic smirk, "I thought Jim liked a good prank."

Andy shook his head in fearful admiration. "Lady, you are one cool bitch. Remind me never to get on your shit list."

She wasn't insulted, as he knew she wouldn't be. "Don't ever forget it, buddy."