Shirou had to admit, things were certainly getting weird since the start of the Grail War.
A Grail War that had lasted all of two days.
First he had met Caster, summoned Assassin and Saber, contracted Lancer, then Rider and Archer and lastly Berserker.
Then he had discovered he had an adoptive sister, discovered she was going to die and helped her survive, discovered that Sakura had had absolutely horrific things done to her by her grandfather and brother and he had managed to help her the same way he had helped his sister... and both had kissed him.
It was the kisses that really caught his attention.
Why were they doing it?
And why did Rin seem so angry at the fact that they had kissed him?
And why did Fuji-nee seem so... well, lively when she caught Sakura kissing him?
That wasn't even including that jerk Lancer and how he kept laughing at him... and calling him a ladies' man... and making bets with Caster about him...
Seriously, what did they all find so funny?
In the end, all he could do was let out a sigh at that.
He had no idea what was going on.
Sure thank you kisses weren't normally on the lips but he supposed he had saved their lives, so their gratitude was probably a little greater than normal.
Though it was really weird that his first kiss was stolen by his own sister.
Even if it wasn't by blood.
He idly wondered though, why had Sakura taken Ilya and Rin away?
Oh well, he guessed he would probably find out sooner or later.
He was also grateful that whatever might happen, he wouldn't have to deal with Fuji-nee taking everything out of context.
Sometimes it was just so convenient to send her home under hypnosis.
XXX XXX XXX
"So..." Ilya started as she watched the other two girls that were vying for her Onii-chan's heart, "why did you call us here Matou?"
"Indeed, I don't believe we have anything to discuss now," Tohsaka was clearly wary as well, the Matou were a long line of magi and therefore, rather likely to have some type of powerful magecraft on her side.
"Yes we do," the purple haired girl stated with a firm voice, "Shirou-senpai."
"What is there to discuss?" Rin certainly sounded offended at that statement, "just because you two managed to get the first strikes doesn't mean I'm backing down."
"And do you think I'm going to give up on him just because we're adopted siblings?" she asked with just as much seriousness as the Tohsaka heir.
"No I don't," the Matou girl was far more assured than she was before, "but let's look at it this way, I kissed him and he didn't realise what my feelings for him were," that was perfectly true, then the girl pointed at her, "you even shoved your tongue down his throat and he still didn't realise what you want of him."
Ilya found herself gritting her teeth at that statement.
She really wanted Shirou, he saved her when the rest of her family would sacrifice her... plus he made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside whenever he spoke to her.
"So what are you saying?" she decided to ask through gritted teeth, she would hear out the girl but if she didn't like what she heard then she would most certainly make her life a living hell.
"If we can't get through to him alone... then I think we should work together," that made her freeze and clearly Rin was just as shocked at that statement.
"Yes, that sounds like a wonderful plan," all three of them jumped in shock at that statement before turning to see a familiar robed figure leaning against the wall, "take him to his room, strap him to the bed and ravish him for an entire night... who knows, maybe I'll join in too."
"Caster... what are you?" Tohsaka started to ask before getting cut off by the woman.
"Let us be honest here," she started, "despite his flaws, my master has so many good traits that not feeling some attraction to him is rather... difficult."
"Are there any other servants in your position?" Ilya found herself asking curiously.
"Assassin is interested in it as well, apparently she finds his devotion to his ideal's something worth respecting," the Greek witch said with a small grin.
"Really? I would've thought a Muslim wouldn't have sex outside of marriage," Tohsaka sounded almost offended as she said that.
"According to what she told me... as his slave she is legally allowed to do so," that made Ilya sweat-drop, something she was certain Rin and Sakura were also doing.
"That's... different," the second owner of Fuyuki proceeded to say with a sweat-drop.
"And what about Saber and Rider?" Sakura asked with a tilted head.
"From what I can tell... Saber is too proud to admit that she's interested and Rider... is more interested in you," Ilya couldn't stop herself from smirking at seeing the Matou heir turn a shade of red usually reserved for cartoons, "so if you are there, then she would most likely be more than willing to join in."
"... so that is potentially seven women," Tohsaka stated while blushing slightly, "... alright, I'm in."
"..."
Ilya didn't know what to think however, given what had happened the last time she had tried to seduce her Onii-chan...
"Alright, we do it tonight," and with that, the four conspirators made their plans.
XXX XXX XXX
Gilgamesh could easily detect the bounded field surrounding the Emiya household, certainly it was subtle and he could tell it was purely an alarm system but that didn't really matter, if he knocked it down then the owner would be informed of his arrival and if he ignored it, the owner would be informed of his arrival.
He didn't care, they were about to face the king after all, letting them know wouldn't make any difference to the outcome of the fight.
And so he ignored it and simply walked in, ready to give the owner a taste of true despair.
Oh, and that cowardly rat was still following him.
By the time he reached the front gate, a young redhead had already emerged from the grounds and immediately he stalled.
He could tell from the mere flavour of the boy's magic.
He was a True Magician.
No wonder the idiot he was now working with failed to win.
"So... I come here expecting a useless worm and instead find a tiger with its fangs bared," he wasn't going to underestimate the boy before him, he knew just how dangerous those that knew True Magic could be... he had faced them before after all.
"Huh?" the boy sounded confused, "oh, Shinji, what're you doing here so late at night?"
"Shut up Emiya! I'm here to kill you!" seriously, that rat was just plain arrogant, even he wasn't guaranteed victory against a True Magician... a worthless worm like him wouldn't last one second against one, "after all, I now have the strongest servant!"
"The strongest servant? Oh," the boy seemed slightly surprised at that, "hey, everyone, it's the eighth servant," wait? How did he know he was the eighth servant?
And then they arrived, seven servants... all connected to the boy... including his Saber.
And then he noticed the three girls that appeared from the gates with murder in their eyes and he began to wonder if he had made a mistake.
"I am the bone of my sword."
The man in red started to chant, drawing the attention of everyone around.
"Steel is my body, and fire is my blood."
"I have created over a thousand blades."
Alright, everyone seemed awfully confused at the white haired man's decision to start an aria, so most likely not Caster then.
"Unknown to death, nor known to life."
"Have withstood pain to create many weapons."
"But these hands will never hold anything."
"So as I pray... Unlimited Blade Works."
And then the world was altered.
And he let out a sigh.
"Do you seriously think a Reality Marble will defeat me?" he asked in disdain, he had shattered one from within just the previous war.
"Who said I was planning on beating you with it?" the tanned man stated with a smirk, "this is just so the house doesn't get levelled... Saber, catch."
And with that he saw it.
A cheap imitation of his Saber's sword.
Which she promptly caught before the faker proceeded to produce another two copies which he held in his own hands.
"You know, having unlimited Prana certainly is nice," the man said before crossing the imitations over, "Ex-calibur."
Oh that is so not fair.
With a massive jump he avoided the massive waves of holy light that crashed into his previous position.
"EX-CALIBUR!" only to find himself in mid air, with no way to manoeuvre out of the way of two new blasts heading in his direction.
"Oh this is bullshit."
XXX XXX XXX
Saber had to admit, getting to fire off Excalibur blasts with every swing without having to worry about tiring out was such a novel experience for her.
Sure she had always had a lot of prana but the cost of using her noble phantasm was just so high that there was she had to make every shot count.
But now, now she was finally getting to show that stuck up Archer from the previous war just how powerful she could be if she didn't have to worry about prana expenditure.
Honestly, it actually made the fact that Archer could create copies of her sword less worrying and more a minor curiosity.
Right now, she was getting her revenge on the golden king that had made a mockery of her in the previous war.
Every shield he pulled out was shattered by the Excaliblasts and she knew that the foe didn't have an unlimited supply of shields capable of defending against her attacks.
And she could do this all century.
Ah, a direct hit!
His armour was finally shattered, revealing a lean body rife with tribal tattoos.
What she knew she and Archer had to do however, was ensure that he never pulled out that sword of his.
"Rule Breaker," and then her salvo stopped as she realised something.
Archer of all people had just managed to sever the Fourth wars Archers contract.
And now she had the same master as her mortal enemy.
"Tell me boy," he spoke quietly, "do you really think you can command I, Gilgamesh, the king of kings?!"
Gilgamesh... HE WAS FREAKING GILGAMESH?!
Then she saw it open once again, the Gates of Babylon, showing off hundreds, if not thousands of legendary weapons, all ready to be fired at and skewer her master.
"Gilgamesh," the voice of the red headed boy could be heard over everything as she felt a truly monstrous prana appear within her master, if she was to rate it she would have to say it was someone between one and ten thousand servants worth of power... that all flowed into a single command seal, empowering it beyond anything she could imagine, "I command you to obey me."
And the command seal vanished.
But she could feel it, binding the golden king to slavery under the boy that had just become his master.
That was when she decided, she never wanted to piss off the boy that her contract was held with.
"Until you learn to keep your ego in check, you are no longer allowed to wear that armour," with that the golden kings armour vanished, "you may only wear this."
And with that the boy created a new set of clothes for the king of kings and Saber found herself having to suppress a laugh.
"Master," Assassin's voice cut out over everything else, "what should I do with this?"
"Kill him," Saber found herself looking, not at Shirou but at the purple haired girl that she had met just earlier tha night.
"Sakura what do you mean?" Shirou was clearly confused by that, "isn't he your brother?"
"Senpai..." it was clear the girl was now feeling guilty about her previous statement.
"I have a better idea," Rin seemed awfully amused by that statement, "after all, Shirou has more than enough power to force a geass on him and he definitely deserves to suffer for everything he's done throughout his life."
"I know," it seemed that Sakura was fully on board with that idea.
"Fine..." and with that, a geass was forced onto the blue haired boy... who promptly begged for death.
XXX XXX XXX
Shirou had to let out a sigh after everything was said and done.
It seemed that the Grail war was finally over... though he supposed he would have to find the Grail for Saber and Assassin to argue over later.
But for tonight, he had eight servants and three attractive magi staying at his house.
He didn't fully understand why the three magi were still there but hey, he wasn't going to turn them down.
After all, even if they only thought of him as a friend, it was still nice to be near such amazing women.
He started to prepare himself for bed, taking off his shirt and unbuttoning his pants when he heard the door slide open and immediately rebuttoned them.
"Senpai," ah crap, what was Sakura doing here now? He remembered that she had said she would be getting ready for bed and that was about five to ten minutes ago... he just hoped she had kept herself dressed otherwise he had a feeling he wouldn't be able to sleep for awhile.
So he turned around and saw a sight that made him feel light headed.
She was only wearing a bath towel.
And why were Rin, Ilya, Caster, Assassin, Rider and Saber all there and wearing the exact same amount of clothing?
"You won't escape this time Emiya-kun," Tohsaka said with a grin.
"Now Onii-chan, are you ready to accept our love?" Ilya asked, making him blush at the obvious teasing that she was doing.
"I am ready to... accept master," Assassin said in her usual monotone.
"Come now, don't you remember why I don't need the grail anymore?" Caster continued for the whole point.
"I'm here because Sakura is," Rider stated bluntly.
"I'm only here because everyone else dragged me," Saber said with a blush.
And with several grins adorning the faces before him, Shirou soon found himself getting pounced on, quite literally.