Lena was riding on a high since coming out to Alex. Suddenly, the world didn't seem so bad. She had been fantasizing about throwing caution to the wind for nearly a week now. In her mind, she would withdraw the money from her account before her mother could even think of the next worst thing to say. In reality, she knew the second she asked her financial manager to close the account, her mother would be contacted as the primary supervisor.
Rationally, Lena knew she couldn't fight it. It was family money - whether she inherited it or earned it at Luthor Corp. Still, that didn't make it anything less than what it was: an egregious violation of her privacy.
—
When Kara arrived for lunch with Big Belly Burger, Lena was positively floating. She hadn't seen Kara since their dinner with Alex, as they were both buried under piles of work, but their conversation seemed almost endless.
The blonde gave her a goofy grin as she closed the door behind her, "Can I…?" Can I kiss you?
Lena shook her head almost imperceptibly as she stood from her desk to guide her girlfriend to the couch, mindful of the security feed. Kara pulled out two burgers and two cups of fries as she sat.
"Do you want coffee or something?" Lena asked, gesturing to the coffee maker in the corner of her office.
Kara gave her a toothy grin, nodding. "With ice please."
Lena bit her lip at the adorable gesture, standing back to stop herself from kissing the other woman. "Start eating. What happened at work?" She asked before heading to the coffee pot, pouring what was left from her earlier brew in a clean mug over sugar. Then, pouring in milk before she walked over to the bar cart to add a few cubes of ice.
"Cat actually wanted me to ask you about the gala," she mumbled through a large bite of cheeseburger.
"Oh?" Lena inquired, smiling as she sat, placing the mug on the table.
Swallowing, the reporter spoke, not bothering to wipe her face that was covered in smeared ketchup. "Yeah, can you swing me a press pass?"
"Do you usually ask for media access with that much food on your face? Or am I special?"
"Yep," Kara chirped before shoving three fries in her mouth.
Rolling her eyes as she unwrapped her own food, Lena continued, "The gala is…well, the fucking gala. My mother is out for blood. I can ask her but you may want to have Cat send an official email over first."
Kara winced, "Yeah, I'll do that. Sorry."
Lena shrugged, "It's just how she is."
"Still," Kara reached forward, giving Lena's thigh a comforting squeeze.
Lena became particularly adept over the years at avoiding topics of conversation that revolved around her mother, or at the very least her real feelings about her mother. This, unfortunately, extended to her conversations with Kara. Unless directly asked, she saw no reason to bring up the fact that for the last week her mother was berating her at every turn simply because she was the easiest target to hit with any pent up stress - gala-related, or otherwise. And Kara hadn't asked…at least not in so many words, not in a way that was unavoidable.
As she tucked into her burger, enjoying the reprieve, Kara spoke. "Cat also asked me to write an article," she began, treading lightly, "about small town gay bars." Kara's voice erred on too-casual as Lena pretended to be very interested in the salt-to-potato ratio on the fry in between her index finger and thumb. "Nothing major, just a couple hours outside the city."
"And you want me to go with you?" Lena asked, finally looking up with narrowed eyes. Her tone hinted at fear and curiosity, but held no malice for the suggestion.
Kara sipped her coffee. "No pressure."
They finished their lunch with ease, discussing lighter topics like Alex's third failed date of the month (this time, with a woman who did a very aggressive and not that drunken rendition of God-des & She's "Lick It" via the bar's karaoke machine) and Kara's latest binge-watch (as many episodes of Love Island as she could find). Lena returned to her work, but not without promising Kara - "I'll think about it." - before they parted ways.
And she did. She spent the better part of her afternoon turning the thought over in her head. Could she even consider stepping foot in a gay bar? Even if it was that far out of town? Even under the pretense of going with a friend for research? She quickly donned her mother's disdainful eye and poked holes in their flimsy story.
Surely at least a smattering of gay men (and, a small part of her hoped, women) remembered her time spent in the trashiest of tabloids when she just entered college - back when she thought a fake ID, drinking her weight in alcohol, and throwing herself at the nearest man could solve her problems. Well, problem. Of course, that slowed once school became her priority, but the boorish men that hung around her brother never wanted to let her forget that regrettable period of her life.
A small voice pushed back at her inner critic; one that reminded her how she stared longingly at the crowd of gay men and women lined up outside the bars in National City's gay district every night on her way home from work. One that told her any gay person who grew up in a small town would know exactly how she felt, no questions asked. And she knew she needed that, that unerring support that only came with real community.
Lena [4:41PM]: I'll go
Kara [4:43PM]: YAY!
Kara [4:44PM]: This weekend? We can stay at an airbnb or something, make a trip out of it? I'm gonna want to go the bar couple times at least for the story.
Lena [4:46PM]: Yeah, that sounds nice. Send me links if CatCo isn't covering it.
Kara sent back the familiar series of sugar-themed emojis that were her usual response when Lena offered to cover a large expense and the businesswoman rolled her eyes.
She still sent back a kiss emoji.
—
That Friday night, the couple found themselves en route to the small desert town that is home to Pat's, the subject of Kara's article. Cityscape turned into mountains which shifted to vast sprawling desert. The exits on the highway drifted farther apart and led to dirt roads, where Lena pulled off into the driveway of their Airbnb with ease. Horses strolled around a set of corrals at the neighboring houses. Ranches, she supposed.
Kara grinned wide, "Horses!"
Lena smiled, nodding. "Let's get settled, then you can say hi?"
Turning off the engine, she lifted herself out of the car. Their host's house was bright pink, jumping out against the dull brown dirt with cacti flowering all around.
"I'll grab the bags," Kara chimed over her shoulder before popping the trunk.
By the time they unloaded their bags and ate dinner, it was nearly nine-o'clock. Time to get ready. As Lena showered, steam filling the bathroom, Kara slipped in behind her. She stepped forward until her bare breasts brushed against the brunette's back.
"Hey," Lena greeted as she felt the blonde's arms snaking around her frame.
Kara placed a soft kiss against the businesswoman's neck as her hand teased down a pale thigh, inching toward the neatly trimmed tuft of hair. "Is this okay?"
"Yes," Lena sighed as she swung her arm back to grab Kara's ass, pulling her closer.
Kara didn't waste time. Immediately, her forefingers were at work, rubbing Lena's clit with the slight teasing pressure that she knew drove her wild. Dipping her fingers down, she teased at the brunette's core as she gathered slick arousal before she continued to toy with the sensitive bundle of nerves. Her free hand trailed up the pale skin of Lena's torso, eventually landing on her girlfriend's supple breast. Cupping the weight of the tender flesh, she felt a rosy nipple harden into her hand in spite of the heat of the water flowing around them.
Lena's hips bucked into her hand. "Fuck me," she whined.
"I thought that's what I was doing," Kara purred with a smirk before running her tongue over the other woman's ear lobe.
She gasped out her demand through Kara's never-ending ministrations. "Inside. I need you inside. Fill me."
She nipped at the pale skin of Lena's neck as her fingers sunk into molten heat. Lena moaned - yes - at the intrusion, grinding down to meet Kara's thrusts. The blonde worked her skilled fingers in and out at a bruising pace as Lena began to melt further into Kara, too far gone to hold her own weight.
"I've got you," she encouraged as Lena moaned against her cheek. "You're so good. So brave, Lena."
As she tugged at a taut nipple, she felt the brunette begin to tighten around her fingers. With one final thrust, her palm brushing over Lena's engorged clit, she came with a sharp gasp.
She hummed for a moment, smiling, before she finally turned to kiss the other woman. As she deepened the kiss, her hands exploring, she mumbled, "We should really shower." And they did, eventually.
—
When they arrived at the bar, it seemed no different from an average straight bar. Pool tables were scattered throughout the back half and men wore work boots that scuffed the floor with dirt. Though, as Kara looked around, so did the women. Some were dressed for hard labor - stiff boots, jeans, and loose shirts - but others wore nicer clothes, though certainly not to the level which Lena insisted. (If I'm going to do this, I'm going to do this right, she'd said.) The latest hits buzzed over the stereo system and a few couples paired off. Big, hairy men danced with thin, muscular twinks and nearby women were paired off in various arrangements. The lines of masculinity and femininity seemed to be even more blurred in this place where there were farms as far as the eye could see.
Kara was at ease, no more or less at home than she was in National City's various gay bars. Lena, on the other hand, was positively vibrating with anxiety.
"Drinks?" Kara asked. "I need to check in with the owner."
Lena nodded absentmindedly, too afraid to speak. Kara, noticing the sudden change, met her eyes. "You good?"
"Yeah," she lied. "I'm fine."
The blonde smiled sympathetically. "I'll get you something strong? Or you can always leave."
Lena gave her a tight, anxious smile, "Vodka cranberry, please."
When Kara began to lean over to give her a peck on the cheek, Lena realized that - in spite of all the build up to this moment - they had never discussed the rules of engagement. She leaned back, "What are you doing, Kara?"
Sadness danced across her eyes for a moment, but she recovered quickly. "Sorry, I guess I just thought—. Forget it. Sorry. Drinks." As she turned on her heel toward the bar, Kara called out, "Find us a table!"
As Lena settled in a booth against the wall, she berated herself. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Of course she asked me here expecting to kiss me in public. Of course she's upset. I can't believe she's lasted this long. What is she waiting for? She should've left me months ago.
Kara found her at the table, five minutes deep into a self-imposed lashing. When she slid into the booth, setting Lena's drink down in front of her, she tried to catch her eye. "Are you okay?"
"I'm sorry," Lena said more to the table than Kara as she picked at the napkin on which her drink rested.
"There's nothing to apologize for. We should've talked more about it, that's all. Have your drink, I'll take some notes and try to talk to some people, then we'll see how you feel."
Kara said it like it was the simplest thing in the world - and maybe it was - but to Lena it felt like her lungs were in a pressure chamber, and that pressure chamber was trapped thirty-thousand leagues under the sea.
"Okay," she said, finally sipping her drink.