About five years until it'd all be over. Five years, and his disappearance wouldn't matter.
Five years.
God, Momo buries his hands in his hair, that's so fucking long. That's too long. He bites his lip as he continues to stare intensely at the kunai laying innocently before him.
His arms ache.
You have to wait a month, he reminds himself. One month, then another. Easy. Look at how many months you've made through. One more month is nothing.
He removes his hands from his hair.
Sixty-seven months and you'll be gone. You've made a hundred and thirty-four, you can make the rest.
Only fifty-nine months until the next world war is declared.
Only sixty-nine months until the next world war ends.
Are you going to kill us in that war?
I-
Someone knocks on his window, and he scowls before shoving the kunai behind his bed.
Thank god for his hate of sunlight, he can't help but think as he shoves open his curtains. It's Kakashi.
Momo's standing in just a pair of boxers and an oversized t-shirt with a pair of cutesy peaches printed on it, his scars on display, but he can't bring himself to care.
When in doubt, just blame some randos you probably pissed off, right?
(He knows that excuse is flimsy at best, but he didn't pass his psych evals just to be outed as unstable. He was great at bullshit.)
(The village didn't care, anyway. They wanted semi-capable cannon fodder and Momo fit the bill.)
(Momo doesn't think about the sad look on the Hokage's face when he was confronted.)
(Momo doesn't think about the fact that if the council cared about a no-name civilian, he would've been pulled out of the Academy.)
(Momo thinks about Sakura.)
Momo unlocks his window and pulls it open with a scowl. "Hatake, what the hell?"
The sun's setting in the distance and it's slowly becoming chilly out. Momo shivers slightly at the cool breeze.
Hatake just pulls that bullshit eye smile. "May I come in?" Hatake asks as he climbs through the window without hearing Momo's response.
"Yeah, sure, go ahead and make yourself at home," he replies sarcastically. "What brings you to your poor, decidedly underaged student's bedroom?"
Kakashi eyes up Momo's cutesy room with interest. The walls are painted a creamy colour and the carpet peach. There are cute plushies placed randomly around the room, and it's all relatively clean except for a corner piled with laundry.
Kakashi's relatively surprised. His parents had insisted he not enter the room due to the fact that Momo was apparently constantly warning them of traps.
"I tried the door, but nobody answered," says Kakashi.
"Yeah, Sakura's at her apprenticeship and my parents are...somewhere, probably," mutters Momo, plopping himself onto his bed. "What do you want?"
"Mind telling me why you smelt like alcohol the other day?"
Momo scoffs. "Right. I'm not anywhere near old enough to be let into a bar without someone snitching, so..."
"Momo." Kakashi stares him down. "Genin aren't allowed to drink alcohol until they're officially registered as genin. You were only registered today."
"Like you care," Momo responds dryly, pulling a large panda plushy to his chest and curling into his pillow.
"I do."
Momo snorts. "I'm sure."
"Momo. From what I can tell, you're at risk," Kakashi says.
"I passed my psych evals. Kids get curious, y'know. Ain't new."
"And your scars?"
"What can I say, I'm a klutz," Momo says curling into a corner. "I'm sure you have scars too. Lotsa people do."
Anxiety lights up in his chest like a beacon. He fights to remain stoic, Shit, I thought this was gone.
"Momo."
"That's my name," replies Momo. "You don't know me, Hatake, and I don't know you. So get yourself and your weird nose away from me."
"Momo."
"Hippity hoppity, get off my property, demon!"
D-rank after D-rank.
Family dinner after family dinner.
Two months of mundane suffering.
(One hundred thirty-six-)
At least I'm occupied, Momo tries to think. Oh, who am I kidding. This whole "silver lining" thing is bullshit.
Then, finally, something gives.
Or rather, Naruto gives.
"I think Naruto is ready for a C-rank," the Hokage says (or something along these lines).
Naruto gets his hopes up, rambling about princesses and nobles. Momo snorts, Yeah, right. All you're getting is an alcoholic liar.
"—the snot-nosed brat and that tiny little girl." Momo's eyes narrow as he catches the end of Tazuna's drunken criticism.
"First of all, bitch—"
"I'LL DEMOLISH YOU—!"
"Now, now," Kakashi interjects, clutching Naruto and Momo by their scruff like misbehaving kittens. "I'm afraid that you can't demolish our client."
Momo glowers, but is slightly sedated by the fact that the plot is actually moving. Fucking finally.
He's waited twelve years for this shit.
Momo's parents go overboard, Kizashi exclaiming about how his "baby boy" is growing up. Mebuki cuffs him.
Sakura sews him a new armband with hidden weapon compartments within, and goes overboard checking over his supplies.
Civilian pace is slow. He feels like a turtle slowly creeping across the road with a possibility of getting run over.
Then, finally, the puddle.
Which, yeah, pretty obvious. It was pretty fucking warm in the Land of Fire. Snow was rare, and rain didn't happen much during this time of year.
Especially if plot-convenient.
And the bulky mist-nin just appear out of the puddle (pretty surreal, if Momo was being honest) and it's fight or die.
Momo takes position over the bridge builder, while Sasuke takes down one of them, and Naruto—predictably—froze up.
Not that Momo could honestly blame him, if Momo didn't thrive on adrenaline and dysfunction, he'd likely do the same thing.
The shadow of death comes quickly, and Naruto froze in the face of it.
"Sasuke, good job subduing the enemy. Momo, good job remembering to protect the bridge builder. Naruto, I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd freeze up like that."
And Momo internally cringes, because that sounds so backhanded.
Naruto, as canon, is poisoned then flips out.
Naruto, also as canon, stabs himself.
Been there, Momo thinks morbidly.
Also, dumb Naruto. That's not an efficient way of getting the poison out.
"Naruto, as cool as that was, it wasn't cool, it was hella dumb. Hello, blood loss!" Momo quips amusedly.
"Good idea to stop the bleeding now," hums Kakashi.
Momo frowns as Kakashi stares at the wound for longer than necessary after bandaging it.
The fox realization.
Dun dun dunn…
Thick fog. I hate it, thinks Momo, as a large bridge comes into view.
"Woah! IT'S HUGE!" Naruto shouts.
Dumbass.
"The men who are after you," Kakashi says to Tazuna. "If you don't tell us why, I'm afraid I'll have to end the mission at shore."
"I suppose I have to tell you," murmurs Tazuna. "No, I want to tell you. The one who is after me is a very short man who casts a very long and deadly shadow."
Dramatic, much?
"Is it the shipping magnate?" Momo prompts him. I can't take anymore of the cringe-worthy uses of melodramatic literary devices.
Tazuna nods mutely. "Yes. Gatō of Gatō Transport."
Kakashi narrows his eyes at Momo. "How'd you know that?"
"I like being informed. My kaa-san's a business woman. She mentioned that since Gatō came into the picture, dealings with Waves have disappeared completely. I can read between the lines," Momo half-lies.
"Yes. Gatō uses gangs and ninja to sell contraband and drugs, cutting down those who stand in his way."
"Let me guess, the reason you lied is 'cause you guys can't afford a higher ranking mission?"
"Yes. In the Land of Waves, even our nobles are poor. The common people who are building the bridge can't afford an A or B-ranked mission."
Sasuke glances at Momo in interest. "That means those guys we fought in the forest were working for him."
Then, Tazuna begins the guilt trip and Momo zones out.
"Naruto, quit being a dumbass," growls Momo.
The stupid bitch was high strung and jumpy, throwing kunai everywhere. Didn't the idiot realize that it wasn't a fucking game? It wasn't a competition?
It was fucking life or death, and Naruto's naivety was pissing Momo off.
("Sully, ETA on backup?"
"At least five minutes, Sarge!"
"Shit," hisses Matthers, ducking behind his police car as more stray fire comes his way. "We don't know how long Diaz has," he adds, eyeing the roof the uniformed officer was taken hostage upon.
Diaz was killed and one of the perps got away.)
Then, it was the bunny.
Also obvious. You learn all about animal cycles and evolution in the modern world. In this one, you learn signs of fake ones.
Everything was obvious, down to the bridge builder's lies.
(You don't show up to a meeting with the head of a shinobi village obviously drunk unless you're either a drunkard or have something to hide.
Tazuna hasn't made a move towards alcohol since the meeting. No signs of withdrawal. Not an alcoholic, just wants us to think he is; covering up nerves. Wants to be sober so he can run from danger.
You don't make such a big deal of your protection being young unless you actually think you'll need protection.
Tazuna's old and in the right career to have hired shinobi before.
You don't live that long without learning that twelve-year-old shinobi are capable of many things.)
Momo can read between the lines.
"Everyone down!" shouts Kakashi, and Momo lets himself flop to the ground gracelessly.
Momo is not a part of the story. He just needs to play Sakura's part and stick along for the ride.
He's gathering funds for the rebellion in Kiri, Momo thinks numbly. He should've stayed away.
Vive la revolution.
"Momochi Zabuza, rogue nin from the Kirigakure no Sato," Kakashi states.
Then Momo sees Naruto winding up to run at Zabuza. Dumbass.
You swore an oath.
You swore an oath to protect the innocent.
Momo grabs Naruto's collar, pulling him back roughly. Momo blinks. Why did I do that?
Kakashi reveals his eye, and Momo watches Sasuke's reactions carefully. The jōnin snaps out orders quickly.
Sharingan explanation for the dumbass.
Zabuza's monologue.
Then the mist comes in.
Oooo, the drama's coming~
Dammit, Inner. Not the time.
You know you're bored!
I am, but I can't really entertain you right now. Where have you been?
Oh, here and there. You are really fucked in the head.
No, really?
Shush. I have something I want to show you.
Not the time.
Later, then. Sasuke's going to do something stupid.
Kakashi will take care of it.
"—I will not allow my comrades to die!"
See?
"I wouldn't be so sure," Zabuza replies.
And then clone confusion ensues.
Hey, hey! Can we switch?
You know that tou-san said that's dangerous.
So? You don't want to be here right now.
No. I don't want to be anywhere, ever.
Switch? Pretty please~?
Not in the battlefield.
Come on, Jeremie!
That's not my name anymore.
Momo just watches as Zabuza kicks Naruto in the face, while Kakashi yells at them.
"—If you get away from him, he can't follow! Now run."
You swore an oath to protect the innocent.
Momo stays planted in front of Tazuna. They'll live.
This isn't a story anymore.
No, it is a story. We're just watching it unfold.
We're part of the narrative.
We're background characters.
Naruto charges forward like an idiot.
You swore an oath.
Unwillingly, Momo juts out pulling Naruto back by his collar and throwing him behind him.
He was going for the headband.
Momo dives forward, grasping Naruto's hitae-ate, Zabuza boots him back to Naruto's feet.
"Hey! Why'd you stop m—!?"
"Your hitae-ate," Momo grits out before Naruto can finish. "So hold the diss."
I'm proud of you.
You took control of my body, didn't you.
Yep. And it's our body.
Bitch.
I'm taking over now.
And then Momo nearly doubles over in pain as a horrible migraine racks his brain, the world's sound becoming distant and surreal.
YOU BITCH, snarls Momo.
Momo vaguely notices Kakashi's brief concerned glance in his direction and Naruto and Sasuke's confused looks.
Momo scowls before shoving Inner's consciousness away from reality. If you want me to do something… "Yo, fuckface, back off!"
Zabuza snorts. "Genin like you should be seen, not heard."
Momo's chocolate eyes stare irrately. "Step the fuck up, Karen," Momo hisses in english , before he shushin's behind Zabuza, discreetly signing at Naruto and Sasuke to figure out a plan. "Here's Johnny!"
"Momo! What are you doing!" Kakashi shouts from his water prison.
Adrenaline rushes through Momo as he dodges a kick from real Zabuza.
"I can fight any genin one handed," states Zabuza.
"Not those ones." Kill yourself, Momo hisses to Inner as he allows a kick from Zabuza to hit him as Naruto and Sasuke come up, their plan thought through.
That's your thing, Jer.
And then he blacks out.