Chapter 14: Doomed

Amelia's face felt puffy and sore, and she knew she looked like a runny, red mess. Her nose was rubbed raw from wiping it with a handkerchief. She let her face hang over a cup of tea, the steam warming her aching sinuses. She sneezed hard again, the tea spilling everywhere. She covered her face with her hand. Dammit she hated allergies, and she hated spring.

"Tch. You look like shit," Levi said with less of his usual derision and more amused affection, plucking a handkerchief out of his jacket pocket and offering it to her.

"And you really know how make a girl feel special," Amelia snapped back, but accepted the handkerchief gratefully.

Levi didn't look the least bit abashed as he rocketed into the air in her 3DMG, spinning in a whirlwind through the blooming trees and flowers. Despite her scratchy eyes, Amelia couldn't help but stare at him in admiration. She had smoothed out the inner track of the belt so that it would glide better based on his advice from their tests, and it had since been running much better. He smashed through the mock titans effortlessly, alternating between his vertical somersaults and horizontal twirls depending on which angle was more advantageous. He'd been growing extremely adept at using the double belt system and although he'd never admit it, he was obviously enjoying the freedom the new belt gave him with the 3DMG.

Sipping what remained of the tea, Amelia set it down next to her notepad in the grass and adjusted her own belt, making sure it was properly tightened before launching into the trees. The second belt had been much easier to make after she knew the specifications and had worked out the kinks with the first design. She still wasn't sure how she felt about the hand controls, as they weakened the soldier's grip but could not figure out where to put it if not on the hilt. Placing it on the belt itself would mean that a soldier wouldn't have ready access to lock and unlock the belt which could be fatal.

For the moment, Amelia was content to half-heartedly chase Levi around the woods, still getting used to the belt. Before attempting to hit anything, she wanted to become comfortable with the blades attached to the gear so that she didn't end up pancaked to the side of a tree like Levi had. She was also enjoying their time together in the gear because it gave her an opportunity to observe his attack style up close and attempt to emulate it from time to time. Amelia certainly had the core strength to move in her gear the way Levi did but would have to develop the technique over time.

Petals fell around them as they shook branches, passing through them or landing on them. The blossoms were beginning to litter the ground and although Amelia hated being covered in their insidious pollen, she would be sad to see their beauty go. She would also be sad as the spring came to its conclusion and Levi and herself would have to spend more time apart.

The new recruits from the 103rd trainees' squad would be joining them shortly, a record breaking seventy-three new recruits. It was the first squad after the disaster of Shiganshina to not have participated in the failed reclamation of Wall Maria and have also seen the Survey Corps rise in prestige after the fall of Wall Maria. Amelia hoped that this meant that the Survey Corps would continue to grow as people became more hopeful in the squad's abilities to one day reclaim Maria. Perhaps the 104th trainees' squad would break 100 recruits the next year, she thought hopefully. But regardless, the huge influx of new soldiers meant everyone would be hard at work training them into top shape before the next expedition.

"Mia!" came the enthusiastic voice of Hange from below them, and Amelia settled to the ground beside them, Levi choosing to continue his practice.

"You look terrible," her squad leader laughed, and Amelia flushed, knowing how blotchy her face likely was.

"What is it with you people and not knowing how to give a compliment," she grumbled irritably. Hange didn't even have to ask what she meant, they just laughed.

"I was going to invite you to come into town with me, but…" Hange's eyes moved to Levi's form in the treetops.

"I'd love to go!" Amelia accepted instantly, thrilled with the opportunity to get out of HQ and into Trost district. "I'd been hoping to revisit the district library, I have a few things to return and would love to browse if you'll be there for a while."

"You got it," Hange said with a wink, glancing up and waving goodbye to Levi. He'd settled against a tree to listen to their exchange and nodded his farewell to the two of them, eyes lingering on Amelia for a moment longer before swinging through the trees.

Amelia tried to ignore Hange's grin as she followed her squad leader to the stables where they saddled their horses and began heading into town. Hange was talking to her about some new interest they were pursuing regarding the titans. Though Amelia would normally listen more enthusiastically than anyone else in the Regiment, today she was still picturing the way Levi flew through the air like he had wings. She wondered if there was a way to make the gear or their uniform more aerodynamic. After all, the cloaks they wore were anything but. The sudden silence made Amelia tune back into reality, realizing Hange was watching her with a knowing grin.

"I'm sorry Major, what were you saying?"

Hange launched back into her discourse on the possibility of an illusionary aspect to the titans and some of their contradictory findings that didn't make sense and the hypothesis Hange was extrapolating. Amelia did her best to listen attentively, trying not to let her mind wander onto her own track of interests. She appreciated Hange's intellectual interest in the titans but would never be able to adopt their countercultural attitude towards them. Amelia knew that Hange had once hated titans as much as any other person, but about seven years ago had done a complete flip in their attitude that Amelia didn't fully understand. She'd been warned by her team not to ask or it would lead to an entire night of discussion.

Trost district was one of Amelia's favorite districts to visit. It was well-populated even after the fear that had swept through many who lived in the districts after Shiganshina and had turned into a thriving metropolis. It seemed to contain all the amenities necessary for self-sufficiency and growth and was the seat of a great deal of trade and wealth outside of Wall Sina. They were one of the few towns that still had things like libraries, carrying records nearly a century old. Most such things had fallen into disrepair and disuse in other districts because of how dangerous learning about the past was viewed. Amelia, and she suspected her squad leader as well, found that idea silly. With her experience of the Underground, all the knowledge Amelia had been able to accumulate in her life had only served to help her own liberation from the darkness both literally and figuratively.

Waving a happy goodbye to Hange, Amelia enjoyed retreating into the musty depths of the library. She had only become confident enough in her reading skills to begin coming to the library in recent months but was already addicted. It was sad to see how empty it was, and the once grand building was falling into disrepair, barely half of the shelves full and many of the books misused. Walking up to the librarian with a smile, Amelia offered her returned books prepared to chat amicably with Everly, a portly middle-aged woman with graying hair. They'd become well acquainted in Amelia's increasingly frequent trips, but today her brows were drawn together, and she appeared agitated, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.

"What's wrong ma'am?" Amelia asked with polite concern, and Everly's eyes shifted over Amelia's shoulder. Turning, she saw a man in a long trench-coat and fedora skimming through books and dropping some to the ground, throwing others hap hazardously back on the shelf in disgust, and occasionally placing one under his arm. He'd accumulated about three books at this point. With an annoyed frown, Amelia began to take a step towards him when she felt a tug on her jacket sleeve.

"Please don't," came Everly's tired voice, having grasped the hem of her jacket between her fingers. "You're welcome to look around but don't get in his way, he's from the military police, he has permission to be here."

"Alright…." Amelia responded hesitantly, squeezing Everly's hand to quell her obvious agitation. Leaning into her she locked eyes with the woman, impressing her sincerity upon her. "If there's a problem let me know, alright?"

Amelia decided to begin her exploration at the opposite end of the library to the man in the bowler hat, not sure how she would react if they came face to face and not wanting to retract her promise to Everly. She found herself musing upon dusty volumes that looked untouched for ages. Pulling one off a shelf, she flipped it open, surprised to find it was handwritten, quickly grabbing another one she was excited to find that she'd come across a collection of journals and manuscripts.

Flipping through the one under her arm, Amelia was delighted to be reading about life in Yalkell district on the western edge of Wall Sina, twenty years ago. Finding the handwriting difficult to read, Amelia perused the other volumes stopping at a more modern looking leather-bound one bearing a filigreed title reading "Dr. E. N. Colman". The lettering of the title reminded her of Levi's immaculate handwriting, and she flipped open the diary, wondering if it would talk about medical advancements. To her delighted surprise the journal belonged to a scientist.

Sliding to the ground, Amelia sat with her back to the bookshelf and enjoyed perusing the tome. It appeared to have been written between five and ten years ago. Dr. Colman rarely wrote out entire thoughts but frequently circled or underlined words, jotting down short thoughts or ideas. His journal was filled with hastily drawn sketches and diagrams that assisted Amelia greatly with understanding his occasionally nonsensical notes. He had sketched a concept for a two wheeled device, with pedals people could rotate with their feet that would help them cover longer distances than walking. He'd jotted next to it "no horses", "reduced use of resources" and a few other quick scribbles she couldn't quite make out.

Flipping through, just scanning the pictures, she froze at a section of ferocious scribbles close to the end and could make out one word that was written in large letters, circled, underlined, and followed by question marks that read simply "FLIGHT". Flipping a few pages, Amelia saw a diagram that made her eyes go wide and buried her nose deeper into the text. The sound of books falling to the ground made her look up, the man in the trench-coat had entered the aisle one shelf beyond her.

Pulling herself to her feet, Amelia grabbed a book from the shelf and hurried towards the front desk, tossing it down in front of Everly, with a breathless smile. "I'd like this one please."

"Mia, I can't let you take a book out without him looking at it." She whispered and Amelia frowned, turning and immediately stepping back against the desk. The man had come up behind her so silently that she hadn't heard him. He towered over her, tall and lanky, the hat casting a dark shadow across his weathered face, his jaw adorned by a thin beard, a dangerous and cunning smile plastered across his face. Amelia had seen smiles like that on the worst and cruelest of the thugs in the Underground and her breath instantly caught in her throat.

"Find something interesting darlin?" He asked, his voice scraping across her eardrums as she nodded silently. Chuckling to himself as he observed her uniform. "Are they educating the Survey brats now on how to be more than titan food?"

"I'm afraid so, sir," Amelia responded neutrally, knowing from experience that the best way to deal with people like this was to get out of their way. They were like raging storms that would destroy everything in their path. Handing the book to him, he took it from her laughing again at the images of the fashions of the Yalkell district.

"How like a female." He sneered at her, handing the book back. Amelia reached to take it when he grabbed her wrist suddenly dragging her to him and she bit her cry of surprise as his eyes focused on the bracelet. "Where did you get this…"

"From my… my…"

"Spit it out girl," he growled, his mocking smile turned into a dangerous frown.

"From my… boyfriend," she answered, feeling strange at giving the title to Levi—but what the hell was she supposed to call him, lover? The man was silent for a moment before he began laughing again.

"Well hurry home to him then, don't want to be out too late, dangerous men walk the streets at night." Amelia nodded and rushed out of the library into the growing twilight, missing the lingering glance the man shot at her. She dove almost nose first into Hange who looked at her in concerned surprise.

"Everything alright Lance Corporal?" Hange asked, grasping Amelia's shoulders and steadying her.

"Yeah, just excited to read this," Amelia smiled as she followed her squad leader back to their horse. Not daring to pull the pages she'd ripped out of Dr. Colman's journal from under her shirt until they were back at HQ.

...

Amelia snuck along the hallways of the headquarters as silently as she could manage in her nightgown, each footstep measured with precision and contemplation. When she at last reached his door, her heart was giddy with excitement at the thought of seeing him. They'd barely said two words to each other over the past few days because of the new recruits, and Amelia was tired of listening to them rolling around in their bunks or the occasional one crying themselves to sleep out of realization of the reality of the Survey Corps. Amelia slid through his door, congratulating herself on her sneakiness as she closed it when a familiar "tch" came from behind her.

Levi was sitting in his bed, propped up by a couple of fluffy pillows, a lantern on the nightstand and a book in his hand. Amelia tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled at him nervously, having not expected to find him awake. His bare torso was revealed tantalizingly by the lantern light, and Amelia found herself wondering if he was wearing anything underneath the bedsheets, her eyes traveling down his lean body.

"Hange needs to teach you how to follow orders. Like staying in bed after curfew." Levi told her, drawing her eyes back to his in disapproval but scooting over so she could join him in the bed nevertheless. "If you were on my squad, you'd be too exhausted from training to do anything but sleep."

"I am constantly thankful I am not on your squad," Amelia teased as she slid under the covers, letting her right arm fall across his abdomen and her head lay against his chest as he went back to reading his book. "I missed you."

Levi paused at that, obviously searching for words to say that were more in keeping with his gloomy and untouchable persona. With a sigh, he let one of his hands rest on her head in a momentary gesture of affection, causing Amelia to grin into his chest.

"How are your new recruits?" she asked.

"The shitheads get worse and worse every year," Levi replied derisively, lowering the book in disgust.

Amelia snorted and he appraised her silently as she shook with barely contained laughter, prompting him to inform her, "Had I known you'd lose all respect for me, I would never have entered into this relationship."

Amelia clapped a hand to her heart in mock anguish at his cold response and grinned at him. He hid his face in his book to avoid responding to her smile. She lay back down on his chest, content just to remain in his presence, knowing that his letting her stay with him and not immediately ordering her back to the barracks was a testament to how much he'd missed her back. His hand meandered across her wrist, twisting the bracelet that adorned it as if he'd done it a hundred times, and Amelia frowned, shifting uncomfortably against him at that thought. The stone had been polished and the leather well cared for, but upon close inspection the colors of the stone hid small nicks and the leather was supple and worn, easily bending around her wrist rather than needing time to be broken in. After weeks of wearing it, she'd begun to suspect it was much older than she'd thought.

"What is it?" Levi asked her, and Amelia realized he'd been staring at her for the past few moments.

"Nothing," she smiled at him reassuringly, but Levi captured her jaw in his hand, the lantern-light flickering in his dark eyes as he stared at her.

"Don't lie to me brat," he told her. "You get quiet and tense when you're thinking… and your nose crinkles."

Amelia blushed pleasantly at Levi's analysis of her, staring appreciatively into his dark eyes. It was when he said things like that, that she realized how much he cared for her.

"Levi…" she began hesitantly, "How old are you?"

His eyebrows raised in surprise at her question, her cheeks darkening further. "It's not that I care, I just realized I don't actually know."

"I turn thirty-three the Thursday after next," he answered slowly, examining her face for a reaction. Amelia wasn't overly surprised, Levi looked young, but the more time she spent around him the more she realized that he was older than he appeared. She let her head drop against his chest thoughtfully as he continued to examine her. "And you?"

"I'm twenty-two," she smiled, happy to have been asked by him.

"I thought you were younger," he admitted.

"And I you," Amelia agreed with a soft chuckle. "I was much older than the typical recruits when I joined."

They fell silent for a while after that, her attention focusing on the bracelet again when Levi flipped her onto her back pinning her arms above her head, looking dangerously into her eyes. "What did I tell you about lying to me?"

"I-I umm, what?" Amelia said dumbly, breathless at his body pressed close to hers, and his face hovered centimeters above her own.

"What's wrong?" He demanded.

"A man in town seemed to recognize my bracelet," Amelia told him, and he frowned deeply at that.

"Who…?"

"I'm not sure, it was just in passing…. You didn't buy this bracelet in town, did you?" She asked quietly, and he rolled off her, their legs still entwined. He ran his fingers across her bracelet.

"It was my mother's, before she died." He said emotionlessly, and Amelia balked, sitting up in surprise.

"Levi! I can't keep this, I never would have accepted this if I'd known—" her rant was cut off by his lips on hers, a silencing finger replacing them when he pulled away.

"I want you to have it. I don't have many memories of her, so it's not terribly important. But you're the only one who would be able to appreciate it." Levi grasped her hand in his, locking eyes with her. "Keep it."

By the time morning came, Levi had successfully distracted her from worrying over the bracelet… multiple times. She lay curled in his arms and he held her soft body, enjoying the touch of her skin against his and the look of complete contentment on her face as she slept. Levi trailed his fingers up and down her side, taking a moment to memorize the location of each freckle on her back. Her questions about the bracelet had shook him. He'd never planned on telling her its true origin and her meeting someone who claimed to recognize the bracelet was disconcerting. As far as Levi knew there was only one person who knew about the bracelet, but he was long dead, probably finally captured by the military police and hung for the countless murders he was responsible for.

Levi reminded himself that fluorite pendants were not uncommon, and the man had probably seen many like hers. After all, it seemed that men generally enjoyed complimenting young beautiful women. The thought of someone approaching her in that way made his stomach boil, but as Amelia's eyes flickered open to stare at him sleepily, filled with complete devotion, Levi knew he had nothing to fear.

Amelia assisted Levi in putting on his uniform, resulting in him taking much longer than he normally would have on his own. When they exited his bedroom, she snuck quietly into the hallway, her tussled hair and nightgown her only attire. He followed her with a neutral expression on his face, he was hardly embarrassed of their sexual relationship, and if she hadn't had the foresight to bring clothes for the morning after that was her own damn fault.

Two new recruits walked by them and snickered softly to each other. One of them turned to the other and whispered, "That's his girlfriend."

Levi froze and turned a dark glare at the two new cadets whose smiles immediately melted into looks of terror.