A Shoulder to Cry On

Trigger warning: brief description of violence between siblings.

The trunks were loaded onto the train and it was finally time to set off. Claudia said the briefest of good-byes to her parents and disappeared into the prefects' carriage. She could not wait for the train to start moving.

It was the prefects' job to patrol the train and the Head Boy and the Head Girl were going to assign them shifts. Claudia did not know who else made prefect. She was relieved to see that it was Emmanuel, rather than Severus, who was the other Slytherin in the carriage. They had not been that close since he failed to get on the Quidditch team last year, but she still considered him her friend. More importantly, she could not face a whole journey to Hogwarts with Severus. Not after what happened in Diagon Alley.

As expected, Lucy did make prefect for Ravenclaw and Sirius' friend Remus Lupin was one of the Gryffindor prefects. The other Gryffindor prefect was a red-headed girl that Claudia did not know too well. Same went for the other Ravenclaw and both of the Hufflepuffs.

Claudia's shift was not until later, so she made her way to the compartment where Alice was sitting. She desperately wanted to tell her that she saw You-Know-Who and maybe even about the artefact. She was tired of hiding things from her best friend. And after last night, she knew that Alice was right. She deserved to know.

Unfortunately, Alice was surrounded by her friends and Claudia could not tell her anything. Claudia listened to the chatter about summer holiday for a while and then leaned toward Alice.

"Can we talk?" She whispered. They got up and made their way into the aisle, looking for an empty compartment or perhaps a quiet corner at the end of the carriage. They did not get far before they bumped into the red-headed Gryffindor prefect.

"I've been looking for you everywhere. You're supposed to be patrolling with me. Not chatting to your friends… I'm Lily, by the way." She said, frowning. Claudia was pretty sure that was not the case.

"I'm not on for another four hours." She said. Lily shook her head.

"Let's go and find the Head Boy." Said Lily and started to march away. Claudia did not move. She was not going to let this self-righteous busybody boss her around.

"I'm not on for another four hours. I'm sure of it." She said sharply. Lily wanted to argue but luckily the Head Boy had appeared.

"Good. You're both here. We need some extra help down at the front of the train. The young ones are out of control. Some of them got their hands on butterbeer. Too much sugar." He said quickly and disappeared.

Lily took few steps to follow him and then stopped.

"You aren't going to argue now, are you?" She asked Claudia with a frown. Claudia could feel her temper rising. Alice chuckled behind her.

"Just go. You don't want to get the badge taken away from you on the first day." She whispered. Claudia scoffed. She did not. But she hated taking orders, especially when she knew she was in the right.

She spent the rest of the journey policing the train. Her mood was so bad that she might have gone bit overboard with the punishments she handed out. Never had so many detentions been given on the journey to Hogwarts.

"People are already saying you will be the meanest prefect this year!" Joked Emmanuel as they disembarked from the train. Claudia laughed. She liked the idea of that. And it made her forget about You-Know-Who for a while.

Claudia barely paid any attention to what her fellow Slytherins were talking about at dinner. She kept glancing at Severus, who was looking at her suspiciously. If he had not told Marcus already, it was only a matter of time.

At the Gryffindor table, both Alice and Sirius looked busy. If only this was a normal dinner, she could have sat with Alice and told her everything. But with the formal feast on, she was stuck at the Slytherin table without a chance to speak to either of them tonight. After dinner, she had to escort the first years to the common room and then show the girls to their dormitories. But maybe, if she hurried, she might just have enough time to write to Sirius and hope he sees her message. Maybe they could meet on the fourth floor later.

She rushed the first years to bed and then run back to the common room to pick up her bag. But before she could get there, she found herself face-to-face with Marcus. Severus was standing behind him.

Before she could do anything, Marcus grabbed the wrist of her wand hand and yanked her towards him.

"What are you up to?" He hissed in her face. He was angry, but she could see a flicker of fear in his eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Claudia replied, with all the defiance she could muster. He raised his other hand and grabbed her by the base of her throat. He pushed her against the wall.

"Whatever it is, stop. You have no idea what you are dealing with." He hissed through gritted teeth. Claudia could not respond, as Marcus grip on her throat was tightening. The chain on which the artefact was hanging was digging deeper and deeper into her skin. All she managed was a smirk. She must not give anything away.

Marcus did not wait for a response. He threw her on the floor, turned on his heel and walked off.

Claudia got up as fast as she could and run back to her dormitory. She was very shaken and her throat was hurting. She knew her brother was a thug, but never experienced actual physical violence from him. That was the purview of Claudia's mother…

She noticed almost immediately that something was not quite right. Her trunk was open, her books rearranged, and her bed turned out. Nothing was missing, but it was clear to Claudia that someone had been through her stuff. What was not clear was who. Marcus could not get into the girl dormitories. He must have got one of his admirers to do it.

Claudia was very relieved to find that her notebook from Sirius was intact. She really needed to talk to him. Alice would freak out. She took out a quill, dipped it in ink and froze.

She had no idea what to write. The reality of what happened to her over the last two days was just too horrible to put into words.

"Are you awake?" That was all she could bring herself to write.

She was very tired, after all she did not sleep last night either. But could not sleep, she was scared again. Her wand drawn, she kept staring at the notebook but never got a response. Sirius was either fast asleep or busy. She had no idea when she managed to fall asleep. Or if she slept at all.

After breakfast, she spotted Sirius waiting outside of the Great Hall. He grinned when he saw Claudia's badge.

"Do I need to watch out?" He asked.

"We both do." Claudia replied glumly. She must have still looked pretty shaken because Sirius' expression had changed almost instantly.

"Are you ok?" He whispered. Claudia shook her head. There was no point pretending otherwise. She looked around and nodded towards the small room next to the Great Hall, which was only ever used to prepare first years ahead of the sorting ceremony. They slipped inside.

"Marcus knows that I know. About the artefact." Claudia said hastily, as Sirius shut the door behind them.

"How?" Sirius asked. He looked alarmed.

"I was looking at a book about dangerous artefacts in Flourish and Blotts. Severus saw me." Claudia replied.

"Are you sure that he made the connection?" Sirius asked, looking somewhat relieved. Claudia smirked. She was bit annoyed that he seemed to think she was overreacting.

"Pretty sure… Marcus threatened me last night." She replied sarcastically.

"He did what?" Barked Sirius, reaching for the door handle. He was past alarmed now. He looked like he was going to find Marcus and punch him in a face. Claudia grabbed his arm.

"Don't do that." She hissed. Sirius did not like that one bit.

"Where is the artefact now?" He asked sharply.

Claudia touched a small bulge under her shirt, where she was still carrying it on a chain. Sirius' eyes opened widely.

"You wear it? What if it's dangerous?" He said, getting even angrier. Claudia did not know what he was expecting. She shrugged.

"Well, I can hardly leave it in the Slytherin dormitories, can I? Marcus had someone search my things last night. Who knows what's next." She said, defiantly.

"Give it to me. I'll hide it in the Gryffindor Tower. It will be safe there." Sirius said and outstretched his arm. There was none of the usual flippant tone in his voice. He meant it and Claudia was slowly losing any strength she had left to argue with him.

Claudia undid couple of buttons on her shirt, took off the chain and lowered the artefact into Sirius's palm.

Sirius had clearly noticed the emerging bruise on her neck. He lifted his hand and used his fingers to move her shirt collar out of the way. Claudia winced, as the bruise was getting quite tender.

"I'll kill him." Sirius muttered and reached for the door handle again.

"Please, Sirius." Claudia whispered and tears started to roll down her face. She rarely cried in front of people. It made her feel stupid. But she could not keep it in any longer. "I'm sorry…" She mumbled and dropped to the floor.

Sirius looked at her and then at the door. He hesitated for a couple of seconds and then sat down next to her.

"He can't get away with this. Now is not the time to pretend you don't need anyone's help." He whispered. He was still mad. But there was also kindness in his voice that Claudia rarely heard before.

"That's not it. He cannot know that you're helping me. This is dangerous." She said between sobs.

"It's just your moronic brother. We have nothing to be afraid of." Sirius smirked.

Claudia looked down at her feet and shook her head, trying to find the right words. She did not want him to fly off the handle again.

"I saw You-Know-Who. He was in our house." She whispered, trying to dry her eyes. It was pointless. She could not stop crying.

"What do you mean he was in your house? When?" Sirius asked, his voice rising again.

"He came to talk to my father… He was mad… Wants the artefact... Desperately." Claudia could not even speak in complete sentences anymore. The tears were making it impossible.

Sirius shuffled and tentatively put his arm around Claudia.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He whispered. Claudia shrugged.

"There was no time." She said and lowered her head on Sirius' shoulder.

"We'll find a way to destroy it. I promise you." Sirius whispered back and held her tighter.

They sat in silence for a bit. Claudia's tears have finally dried. She looked at her watch.

"We need to get to Potions." She muttered. Sirius rolled his eyes.

"You aren't going to class. Go to bed. I'll tell Slughorn that you aren't well." He said, quite sternly.

"It's not like I can sleep. Not until I figure out who it was that searched my things." Claudia replied, with a sigh.

"Put protective enchantments on the curtains." Said Sirius like it was something he was used to doing daily. He frowned. "And write to me if something does not feel right. I'm begging you." Sirius added, as gave Claudia a brief squeeze and helped her get up.

They walked out into the Entrance Hall and made their way down the stairs into the dungeons. They saw Marcus walking in their direction.

Claudia grabbed Sirius' arm and pulled him around a corner.

"Promise me." She whispered, urgently. Sirius did not have to ask what she was talking about.

"Fine." He said through gritted teeth. She could see the hatred in his face. They waited for a minute for Marcus to pass. Claudia was not totally convinced that Sirius was not going to set off after Marcus the moment she left him. For some reason, that made her feel better.

"I'm coming to Potions." She said, as they began heading towards the classroom again.

"You don't trust me, do you?" Sirius quipped.

"Not one bit." Claudia chuckled. She was happy he was looking out for her.

It took Claudia all her strength not to fall asleep in her classes that day. It was not how she imagined the start of her OWLs year to go. She went to bed straight after dinner. She shut the curtains and cast the protective enchantments. Finally, she would be able to get some sleep. She closed her eyes…

She was lying in Hampstead Heath. It was a beautiful summer day. Suddenly, she could feel someone's breath on her cheek. She turned around and saw Sirius. He was lying in the grass next to her. He lifted his hand and placed it on the back of Claudia's neck. He played with her hair. Claudia closed her eyes and kissed him.

She felt so happy, so safe, like she was falling backwards into thousands of pillows. It was a weird feeling. She opened her eyes. Sirius was gone and she was indeed falling.

She was falling from a great height, her broomstick in hand. It felt like it will never stop. She gasped and woke up.

Everything felt sticky. She reached for a glass of water at her bedside table and drained it, before falling back into her pillow. She was about to drop off again when she remembered the dream.

Her mind started to wonder what it would be like to hold Sirius' hand. To kiss him. To bury her face in his chest, while he held her tight. Claudia drifted back to sleep. She was on Hampstead Heath once more…

When she opened her eyes again, it was the morning. She remembered the dream again.

"Oh no. No. No. No. No. No." She muttered to herself. It was just a dream. Their friendship was too precious to her and she knew full well what happened to all of Sirius' 'relationships'. Even if he liked her, which he did not, he would get bored within a week and that would be that. She must not fall in love with him.

Claudia caught up with Alice after lunch, they were sitting in the courtyard. She was vaguely aware that her best friend was talking but did not have it in her to pay attention. She could not stop thinking about her dream.

"What's up with you? You have that look again." Asked Alice when she noticed that Claudia's mind was elsewhere.

"What look?" Claudia said, defensively.

"The 'Anthony-look'." Replied Alice.

"I had a weird dream about someone. And now I can't get him out of my head." Claudia said with a sigh. Alice's eyes twinkled.

"Who is it?" She asked, full of excitement. Claudia could not quite bring herself to say. By a stroke of luck, Sirius and his friend were just walking through the gate to the courtyard. They were huddled around a piece of paper and looked like they were arguing.

Claudia tilted her head towards them. The excitement had drained from Alice's face.

"Please tell me you mean Lupin." She said, with a hint of disappointment in her voice. Claudia shook her head.

"Potter?" Asked Alice. Claudia shook her head again.

"Pettigrew?" Alice asked, hopefully. Claudia scoffed. The disappointment in Alice's face had been replaced by loathing.

"I thought you were better than that." Alice said, before adding. "I mean, he is good looking. But you barely know him." She laughed and continued. "Trust me. If you knew him, you'd feel differently."

Claudia sighed. "Please don't me mad…" She said, but Alice interrupted her.

"Why would I be mad. You're fifteen, he's got that bad boy aura, things happen…" She chuckled. Claudia shook her head.

"Please don't be mad about what I'm going to say next…." Claudia managed to finish the sentence. She continued. "You know how I promised I wasn't going to look into whatever my brother was up to?" Alice frowned. She knew what was coming.

"Well, I have been looking into it. And Sirius's been helping me. We've been friends for months." Claudia finished, looking at her shoes.

Alice did not say anything. Claudia told her about the artefact, about how they have found it and about You-Know-Who. She even told her about yesterday's freak-out. It felt good to get everything off her chest. But Alice was fuming.

"Why didn't you tell me any of this?! I'm supposed to be your friend!" She whispered, angrily.

"Because I thought you'd be mad. That you'd think it was a bad idea." Replied Claudia. Her eyes were filling up with tears again.

Alice scoffed. "I can't do this anymore." She said, stood up, and walked off. Claudia was left alone in the courtyard. The sandwich she was eating was suddenly tasting like sawdust. She was miserable.

Claudia hoped that Alice could not stay angry at her for long. She needed her best friend. She was so relieved when Alice sat down next to her at dinner.

"Claudia, I'm not your parents. I'm your best friend. You can tell me things even if you think I'll get mad." She said. She was not angry anymore. But there was quite a lot of pity in her voice.

"I'm sorry. I don't deserve you..." Said Claudia, somewhat relieved.

"I'm happy to write to dad..." Alice suggested. But Claudia shook her head.

"My father is too high up in the Ministry for that. I just need to find a way to get rid of it." Claudia muttered in response. Alice thought about something for a while.

"Do you want my help?" She asked. Claudia smiled. It meant a lot that Alice had offered. But she did not want to get her into trouble.

"Just watch out for Marcus… For now." She said. Alice narrowed her eyes.

"I still don't get it though. How can you know what Black is like and still like him?" She asked.

Claudia closed her eyes. She had not really thought about it before.

"He's smart, funny, very resourceful… And can be surprisingly kind." She whispered. Alice looked at her like she had lost her mind.

"Are we talking about the same Sirius Black?!" She asked, bemused. This made Claudia chuckle.

"And yes. He is also unbelievably annoying and an insufferable show-off... Better?" Claudia replied. She could feel that she was blushing. Alice studied Claudia's face for a long time.

"You really do like him, don't you?" She said, finally.

"I'm not sure I want to." Claudia whispered.