AN: A nice long chapter for you all! Originally the end segment was going to be in the next chapter, but since Rick's portion of the chapter was posted on my tumblr months ago for Brick Day I decided to be nice. :) Or maybe not... we'll see what everyone's reaction is at the end of the chapter...

Warnings: a small bit of domestic violence. seriously.

Chapter Six

"So how do you fit into the group?" Sasha asked. Beth liked the young woman so far, she was friendly, tough, and easy with a smile. The merging of the two groups was going well after their initial meeting two days before. They were still in the small town they all met in trying to get a feel for each other before moving on.

"What do you mean?" Beth asked.

"Well, at first I thought you might be with Rick, but you guys aren't affectionate, and then I thought you might be related somehow, but you sure don't look at Rick like he's a relative." Sasha said with a sly smile.

Beth blushed bright red, she thought that she kept her ogling down to a minimum, especially with new people around, but Sasha had only been with them for a day and a half and she picked up on Beth's infatuation. "Rick found me and Jimmy, who was my high school boyfriend, we had been on my family's farm and a herd came through and we ran… and then thank god we ran into Rick, we were completely clueless and out of gas and Rick saved Jimmy from a walker and took us into the group."

"Ah ha, so you do have a bit of hero worship!" Sasha teased.

"It's not just that! I'm mean, yes, Rick's has saved my life a couple of times now, but he cares about me and listens to me, plus he's got a great smile…" Beth trailed off and Sasha grinned at her in response.

"Well, he's a good catch. You get 'im, girl."

"Oh!" Beth blushed harder, which she didn't think was possible. "You don't think he's too old for me?"

"The dead are walking and trying to eat us all, I think age difference is the least of our concerns nowadays," Sasha shrugged.

"Well… he's got a wife and son out there somewhere, maybe, and I don't think he'd ever look at me that way."

"Well, he's lookin' at you, and not in the same way he looks at Morgan or Duane or any of us newbies."

"You really think so?" Beth felt hope fluttering in her chest. She looked over at Rick who was conversing quietly with Tyreese. She almost didn't want to hope, what were the chances of Rick ever wanting her in the same way she wanted him?

Rick was thankful that they had more people in the group, it was less stress on him and Morgan to constantly be on guard, but he missed the closeness he had shared with Beth. She always had a story, a song, or a smile for Rick. She was his anchor, there had been a few times when the loss of his son and wife, the hopelessness of ever finding them became too much for him and he just wanted to snap but then he would look at her, so full of hope despite all she had been through, and his pain would ease.

Beth had a million dollar smile, the first time he had made her smile genuinely it had lifted the mood of the whole group and from then on Rick made it his mission to keep her happy. It was after they had scoped out her family's farm, and their encounter with the men from Philadelphia, and they were scouting nearby farms for supplies when Rick stumbled upon a small peach orchard. It was such a simple thing, he had filled a canvas bag full of peaches and brought it back to the farmhouse they were camped out in and when Beth had peered inside the bag she gave him the brightest smile he had ever seen. "Oh Rick! I love peaches!" she had exclaimed and stood on her tippy toes to plant a soft kiss on his cheek. Rick had been dumbfounded and froze while Beth skipped away with the bag over to Duane to share the bounty. He vaguely remembered Jimmy glaring at both of them. That was the first time Rick had felt hope since he woke up in his deserted hospital room.

And it wasn't just him. Beth had raided supplies that, at the time, the others had thought were useless like brown sugar and flour, but that night she heated up a bastardized peach cobbler in a skillet and the group agreed never to doubt Beth's choices on what supplies were necessary.

And after they lost Jimmy, which could have been prevented if Rick hadn't been angry with the kid for pushing Beth out of the way in his panic, Beth rarely left his presence. She hadn't blamed Rick for not helping Jimmy, neither did Morgan or Duane, and she didn't seem too upset about Jimmy's demise.

So they settled into a routine, it was Morgan and Duane, Rick and Beth. She was always close, a constant at his side while they ate, slept and travelled. Now Rick felt bereft. Beth slept beside Sasha instead of him, she prepared food with Donna, and in their downtime Ben always seemed to be near her. Rick knew it was for the best, a seventeen year old girl should be with people closer to her own age, but he still missed their former closeness.

Beth still spent time around Rick, it was just less often than it used to be. And now Rick seemed to be more heightened in his awareness of her. All her casual touches and smiles were catalogued and he found himself having very inappropriate thoughts about her. She would touch his arm to gain his attention and he would think about how soft her skin was and how it would feel to run his hands along her smooth skin. She would smile up at him and he would think about how her lips would feel against his. Rick would shake himself from these fantasies and berate himself. Not only was Beth half his age, but he was married. Not that it had been the greatest marriage in the last few years with Rick working extra hours just to avoid Lori criticizing him in front of Carl. Somewhere out there his bitter, beautiful wife was waiting to tell him 'I told you so' because if Rick cared as much about his family as he claimed he did back when they used to argue, he would have found them by now.

The group was camped out in a barn they had found a few days ago. It was surrounded by wooden fencing that kept out the occasional wandering walker but wouldn't hold if a herd came through or if a walker knew they were there. It had been a good find, the hay inside was dry and warm and served as insulation against the cool winter air plus they had found a few chickens wandering the property. It wasn't secure enough to stay more than a few days but it was better than the open farmhouse that was now full of walker corpses.

Rick was currently up in the hayloft looking out over the grounds. Tyreese and Allen were gathering wood while Sasha guarded them against any walkers along the tree line that was about thirty yards out. Beth was below in the barn, she had been showing Donna and Ben how to properly butcher chickens the last few days. They were making a stew over a small fire pit that smelled wonderful. Rick could hear Duane laughing about something below and it sent a pang through Rick. When was the last time he heard his son laugh?

Rick wasn't aware of how much time passed that he was up in the loft brooding, he knew Tyreese, Sasha and Allen had returned and he had seen Morgan taking a lap around the fence not too long ago. He heard the ladder behind him shift and he glanced over his shoulder to see Beth approaching him with a steaming bowl. "I brought you dinner," Beth greeted, "it may have too much seasoning, Donna and I might have gone a bit overboard with the spices we found up at the house." Beth said as she handed it over.

"Smells good," Rick said as he sniffed at the contents. Beth leaned against the wall beside the window Rick had been watching from and watched him eat the first few bites. "It's good." He smiled over at her. She smiled back happily and turned to look out the window.

They stood in silence for a few moments while Rick slurped at the stew. "It's hard, isn't it?" Beth asked suddenly.

"What's hard?" Rick asked curiously. Everything was hard nowadays.

"Watching them," Beth turned and gestured to the voices they could hear from below. "Morgan with Duane, Tyreese and Sasha, Allen's family… they've got their families and sometimes it's hard to watch." Beth spoke softly. Rick studied her intently, she looked sad slumped against the wall, her eyes were shiny with tears. "You and me, we don't know if our families are alive or dead. And sometimes… it hurts to look at them."

Rick set his bowl down on the ledge of the window, the ledge wasn't large enough for the bowl and it teetered a moment but Rick didn't care as he pulled Beth into his arms. It was easy to forget that Beth was just as lost as him sometimes as she smiled so easily. Beth's arms wrapped around his waist tightly and she relaxed against him. Rick buried his nose into her hair, it smelled like hay but he didn't care. She was so warm and Rick felt an overwhelming urge to just let everything go, it would be so easy to just kiss her or run his hands underneath her shirt or down into her jeans and cup her round cheeks. He wondered how she would react, how her gasp of shock and pleasure would sound if he went searching for the sensitive spot behind her ear with his lips and tongue.

Rick used strength he didn't even know he had to pull away from Beth gently, to keep this moment nonsexual. Beth had tear tracks down her cheeks and Rick gently wiped them away with his thumb. "It is hard," Rick finally agreed, his voice was rough with emotion. "But we've got each other. And I won't let anything happen to you."

"I know," Beth looked unsure and bit her lower lip. Rick stuck his hands in the back pocket of his jeans to keep from reaching for her. "Rick… I want… never mind." Beth took a step back and a deep breath.

Rick couldn't help but feel like he missed something. Beth grabbed his precariously perched bowl and took a small bite with the spoon. "You sure there's not too much cumin?"

Rick let out a small laugh as Beth handed back the bowl. "Beth, I'm gonna be honest with you, I have no idea what cumin tastes like." Beth laughed too and she smiled up at him and Rick felt better than he had all day. Her happiness was enough for him.

Ben was nice, but he was also annoying. Beth knew she shouldn't be annoyed by him, there weren't many living people left so she should appreciate everyone she could, but he reminded her of a buzzing insect that constantly avoided being swatted. Her only respite was when she needed 'girl time' with Sasha, who thought the whole thing was amusing because she knew of Beth's huge crush of Rick. Like today. They had split into pairs to explore the hardware store that they had just cleared of walkers. Ben had immediately volunteered himself to be Beth's partner but luckily Sasha had interfered and declared it was her turn to be with Beth. Ben had pouted but Beth couldn't prevent the relieved smile she had given Sasha.

"I almost kissed Rick the other day… but I totally chickened out." Beth sighed as she and Sasha walked down one of the aisles of the small hardware store. The others were in the store too, minus Rick and Tyreese doing a perimeter sweep outside. The group was spread out enough that Beth was confident no one would hear her. They had left the barn the previous day and were back on the road looking for supplies and a new place to stay awhile. The weather was still bitter cold but it seemed to slow the walkers a bit.

"Beth! When did this happen?" Sasha turned to face her.

"The night before we left the barn when I brought Rick up some of that stew to eat in the loft and we were alone. And… he hugged me, I was talking about our missing families and he hugged me. And the look in his eyes, I thought he might want me but then… he pulled back and there was this moment… and I froze. What if he rejected me?"

"What if he didn't?"

Beth sighed again and turned back to look over the shelves. They way Rick had held her, the way his arms felt around her, it had seemed more than a comforting, platonic hug. But then he had pulled back and closed off and Beth panicked. "If he rejected me, how miserable would that be? There's only nine of us, I wouldn't be able to hide from him."

"Rick would be crazy to reject you." Sasha said firmly.

"I'd rather keep mooning over him secretly instead of him avoiding me."

"Beth's mooning someone?" Duane's voice interrupted their conversation. Duane popped his head from around the end of the aisle with a cheeky grin.

"Mooning over someone, big difference." Sasha replied with a wink. "Where's your dad?"

"I'm right here," Morgan said as he walked into view. "Beth telling you all about her crush on Rick?"

"Wait, what? How did you know?" Beth asked as a bright blush burned across her face.

Duane and Morgan shared a look and Duane laughed, "Was it supposed to be a secret?"

"C'mon now, go easy on her. Beth, we went a long time just the four of us. It was easy to pick up on." Morgan said soothingly.

Beth was still mortified. A thirteen year old could pick up on her feelings, what if Rick had? Is that why he pulled away from her? He didn't want to encourage her feelings? "Oh god." She covered her face and moaned.

"See, Morgan doesn't care. He doesn't have a problem with the age difference." Sasha pointed out.

"I wouldn't say that, I just don't have a problem with Rick. There's no better man left on this world than Rick. If it weren't for him…" Morgan trailed off and clutched Duane's shoulder. Duane looked at the floor with a gloomy expression on his face. Beth glanced at Sasha's confused face. Sasha and the others didn't know about Morgan's wife, and how Morgan couldn't bring himself to put her down after she became a walker. Not long after they met Rick they were scavenging through a house when she came in after them and had been about to bite Duane, who couldn't bring himself to shoot his mom, when Rick pulled her off of him and put her down with his knife. Morgan and Duane never spoke about the incident and Beth only knew because Rick had told her. After that incident Morgan all but worshiped Rick, he had come so close to losing his son. Morgan cleared his throat before continuing, "I'm just saying, I think you'd be good for Rick. If you had your eyes on some other thirty year old man, I would not support it."

"So no Tyreese then?" Sasha teased lightly. She seemed to pick up on Morgan's desire not to dwell on whatever he was thinking about.

"No Tyreese what?" The group jumped as Tyreese's voice boomed behind them. Beth turned to see Tyreese and Rick walking towards them, but they didn't seem to know what the conversation was about given Tyreese's curious expression and Rick seemed to be looking around for the others.

"Um… nothing. Just, tellin' a joke." Sasha laughed a fake laugh.

"There's a sizable herd a few blocks down, grab what you can and let's move out." Rick told them. They nodded, scrambled back into action, and five minutes later the whole group was loaded back into the vehicles and moving out.

The house they were in was one of the cleanest they had run across in a long time. Clearly no one had tried to camp out here yet and the owners either died or evacuated early on. It wasn't very secure, no fencing around the house, lots of trees to hide oncoming walkers, but the group was so unused to a tidy house that they all unanimously agreed to stay at least one night. Donna insisted that Beth leave preparing dinner to her that night, she told Beth she deserved a night off but Beth had the feeling she was trying to set Beth up with Ben as he had immediately asked her to hang out with him. She had glanced around for Duane, but he was helping Rick clean a rifle, and then Sasha, who nowhere in sight, before agreeing reluctantly.

They wandered into the partially finished basement where an entertainment center was set up but the walls were still cement walls. "Wow, this is pretty cool," Ben marveled at the big flat screen TV and fancy equipment that didn't interest Beth in the slightest. So she merely shrugged and continued to poke around.

There was dart board leaning against the wall, it had never been set up or even used given that the darts were still wrapped in plastic and Beth mused if she should bring it upstairs so everyone could play or watch. Duane would probably like to play at the very least. She had started to turn and suggest the idea to Ben when he appeared suddenly at her side. "Ben! Don't sneak up on me like that!" she yelped and glared.

He smiled and shrugged. "Sorry. Whatcha lookin' at?" He asked and leaned into her personal space.

Beth shifted so that they were facing each other and sighed. Ben had been trying to flirt with her since his family joined the group. She wondered if she should just give in to him. It wasn't like Rick was ever going to be interested in her, and who knew if she would ever meet another boy her own age again.

"Beth, you are really pretty." He told her bluntly.

"Oh, um… thank you," Beth fidgeted awkwardly. The first time Jimmy had told her she was pretty she had blushed and giggled happy to have his attention but now she just felt embarrassed, and not a good, giddy embarrassed, but a please-let-a-walker-charge-in-to-get-me-out-of-this-moment embarrassed. Ben did have a lot in common with Jimmy, they were both tall and gangly, both the same age, both always trying to show off… maybe kissing him wouldn't be so bad. Maybe it was time for her to start thinking practically. Rick was so unobtainable, she really needed to start having realistic dreams. And while Ben was annoying he was also nice.

Beth took a deep breath to gather her courage and leaned up to plant a kiss on Ben's lips. She pulled back after two heartbeats and Ben's face was flabbergasted. Beth frowned. It had been… unremarkable. There's was no spark of flash on anything in her chest, not even a tingle on her lips. Her first kiss with Jimmy had been awkward too, but it had left her happily flustered and willing to try again, but this did not. Clearly it was a mistake.

"Ben, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." Beth apologized and took a step back.

"What?" he snapped out of his daze. "No, it was good!" He followed her and grabbed her arm to pause her retreat and then leaned in for another kiss. It was worse. His lips just mashed into hers and Beth was reminded of a time when her daddy had taken her, Maggie and Shawn fishing and Shawn had thrown a wiggling fish at her and it hit her on the mouth. Ugh.

She broke off the kiss and stepped back. "No, Ben, I'm sorry but I don't want to do this."

Ben glared at her and shook his head, "C'mon Beth, this is good." And he leaned in again.

"Ben, stop." Beth shoved at the taller boy.

"What? You kissed me," he replied angrily.

"Yeah, I said I'm sorry… I just wanted to see how it felt." Beth tried to explain.

"Well, now I want to know how it feels." He shoved Beth against the cement wall and her head banged painfully.

"Ow, Ben, I said no." She shoved at him again.

"Don't be such a bitch. It's the end of the world, you're not gonna get any better offers." Ben's tone was cruel and Beth felt tears start to well up.

He leaned in again and kissed her forcefully and Beth shoved him away again and then slapped him on his face. "I said no."

"Stupid bitch!" and then Ben punched her in the face right in her cheekbone. Beth cried out and fell back against the wall hard cracking her head again.

She was dimly aware of Ben being hauled off her and a voice screaming, "What the fuck?" She looked up to see Sasha holding Ben in a stranglehold and yelling for the others.

Rick and Tyreese came first barreling down the stairs, followed shortly be Ben's parents, Morgan and Duane. "What is going on here?" Rick asked in a low, angry tone.

"I just pulled Ben off of Beth after he attacked her." Sasha's tone was also heated.

"What, she attacked me, I was just defending myself." Ben argued.

Beth was crying but trying to hold back her sobs. She was in pain, her head throbbed all over, and she looked up at Rick through tear stained lashes. She had never seen him look so furious before.

"Beth attacked you? She's hardly a hundred pounds." Morgan interjected.

Rick knelt beside her and gently probed her cheek.

"She dragged me down here, kissed me, and then we start making out and she hits me!" Ben gave his skewed take on the events.

"This just looks like a misunderstanding. Looks like Beth seduced my son and then changed her mind." Allen's tone was condescending as he tried to placate the group.

Rick stood and turned on him, "a misunderstanding? What kind of man hits a girl?"

"She was asking for it—"

"Get out." Rick interrupted Ben.

"What? Rick, don't overreact here—" Allen tried to reason.

"Get out. Get your stuff, get your family, and leave. I don't ever want to see you guys again." Beth couldn't see Rick's expression, but Allen and Donna withered under it.

Allen turned to Tyreese with a desperate expression, "Tyreese, you can't let him do this to us. It's a death sentence."

"Your son punched Beth. I saw it." Sasha responded before her brother could and she sounded just as angry as Rick. She finally let go of Ben and pushed him at his parents.

"If Rick wants you gone, then we want you gone." Morgan chimed in and Duane nodded bravely. Allen then turned angry and marched back up the stairs with his wife and son.

Rick knelt in front of Beth again and Sasha was anxious over his shoulder. "Hey, Beth, let me look at you."

"I … I hit my head," Beth reached up to probe at the back of her head and it came away sticky with blood.

"Rick, she might have a concussion," Sasha said worriedly.

"Beth, I'm gonna pick you up, is that okay?" Beth nodded. Rick pulled her into him and picked her up one hand on her back and the other under her knees. Beth reached around his neck to stabilize herself and then pressed her face into Rick's chest.

AN: To be fair, and some of you reviewers pointed it out as well, Allen and his son are kinda douchebags on the show... so yeah. That's my justification.

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