AN: I've got nothing, I'm too eager to see your reactions to this chapter. :3

Warnings: Lots of action. Graphic violence. Character death. I'm earning the M rating in a whole new way.

Chapter Seventeen

Rick kept a firm hand on Sasha's arm as they snuck through the town back towards the wall. Sasha was stubbornly refusing help walking and Rick was stubbornly refusing to acknowledge her refusal. Sasha was woozy with possible cracked ribs, but she was in far better shape than Glenn. Apparently Maggie's escape had been taken out on Glenn while Sasha had been forced to watch. "I told 'em, Rick, about the prison," Sasha confessed in a whisper. "Their leader, the Governor, had a gun to Glenn's head and I promised Maggie—"

"Hey, it's okay. We'll figure it out," Rick assured her. Shane was only steps away and shot a curious glance back at them. Rick knew Sasha's words would have set off his unstable friend and this was neither the time nor the place to have an argument. Rick preferred to be out of danger before dealing with an irate Shane. Plus, one of the Glenn and Sasha's guards had gotten away. In their effort not to use guns and to stay quiet, a man had escaped. He had seen Oscar's prison jumpsuit. So even without Sasha's confession they were traceable.

An alarm sounded as they neared the spot in the wall they climbed over earlier. Michonne was waiting for them at the base of the wall, she was holding herself awkwardly and Rick could see fresh blood on her clothes.

"What happened to discreet?" Shane snarled as they reached her.

Rick rolled his eyes, it could easily have been their own fault an alarm was being sound. "There's no time for blame, let's get over the wall," Rick hissed back and he helped a woozy Sasha climb.

A shout sounded in the distance and then gunfire. "I got this," Daryl called and Rick didn't stop to take in what was happening behind them. Instead he focused on getting an injured Sasha and Michonne over the wall. Rick went over the other side first to help ease the others' descent. As soon as Glenn was on the ground, Shane and Oscar on the wall, Rick started herding the others off to get out of sight in the trees.

The truck was only fifteen minute away at a light jog, and Rick was preoccupied with Sasha's vertigo and bruised ribs, Glenn's pained, swollen face and Michonne's limp. They ran across three walkers that distracted Rick further, and Sasha proved she was still functional enough to take one down. Rick didn't realize Daryl hadn't followed them until Merle and Shane started arguing when they reached the truck.

"We don't go back."

"That's my baby brother!"

"You know the rules. We Don't. Go. Back."

Merle looked murderous but Shane didn't back down. Rick stared at the man he'd known for most of his life and wondered who he was. Shane had always been easygoing, and occasionally a bit arrogant, Before. This Shane was one Rick barely recognized. He shook his head as he grabbed the duffle bag out of the cab of the truck.

"Rick, what are you doin'?" Shane snarled when he noticed Rick condensing ammo.

"I'm going back."

"No you are not."

"Take Glenn, Maggie and Sasha back to the prison. Merle and I got this. Right Merle?" Merle looked at Rick like he was crazy, and maybe Merle was right. Merle let out a bark of a laugh, "Righ'."

"I'm going too," Sasha wobbled at bit as she got her to feet but her look of determination booked no arguments.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" Rick asked as he held his index and middle finger up.

"Six."

"Good enough," Rick shrugged and handed her a gun.

"Rick, don't be so fuckin' stupid. Daryl Dixon isn't worth it."

"He's one of us," Rick argued. "Now we're heading back. Don't bother waitin'."

"I won' be," Shane snarled and shoved an unsteady Glenn towards the SUV. Glenn stumbled and Maggie caught him, shooting Shane a glare of her own, but they followed anyways. Oscar looked between the two separating groups uncertainly.

"It's all righ'. Go with Shane, make sure they get back safe." Rick encouraged and Oscar shot him a grateful smile before jogging after Shane. "Michonne, you should—"

"Don't you even start with me Grimes," Michonne cut him off and turned back the way they had just came. "Besides, the Governor isn't too happy right now."

"How would you know that?" Merle asked curiously.

Michonne shrugged nonchalantly, "I might've gouged out his eye with a piece of glass."

"The fucker deserved it," Sasha muttered angrily.

Merle let out a whistle of admiration, "You've got some balls my Nubian Queen. I like it."

Rick shook his head with a grin. Beth was going to be furious with him but Rick had to live by a code, or else he was no better than the walkers. Besides, half his promise was being fulfilled. Maggie was unharmed. The truck peeled out of the dirt loudly and Rick offered a cheeky wave at the taillights. "Right. Let's do this."

The hood was pulled off Daryl's head and the surrounding crowd jeered at him.

He wasn't exactly sure how he got here, a bleacher full of people cheering for his demise while he stood in a ring surrounded by angry men and chained geeks. He remembered shooting a man in the throat. The man had spotted them going over the wall so Daryl had taken him out. There were other men in the distance but this man was close, Daryl had been sure he could retrieve his arrow and still make it back to the wall before the other men were close. He remembered leaning over the choking, dying man and yanking out his arrow and then nothing. Someone must have snuck up on him and knocked him out because his next memory has him stumbling and being dragged with a hood over his head while a man spoke and riled up a crowd.

Now a shorter man stood in front of him, but he held himself in a boxer's stance and looked like he knew what he was doing. His skin was dark, a Latino probably, Merle would probably call him a beaner or a taco vendor. Where the hell was Merle, anyways? Daryl felt off balance, he was unable to focus and the crowd spun around him. Plus his hands were roped together. This fight was not going to go well. But Daryl had lots of experience with fights not going well. From playful rassling with his brother to the not so playful beatings from his father, he had lots of experience losing fights. He sneered at the man in front of him, Daryl knew not to show any weakness to these people.

The world steadied around him bit as he focused on a familiar face. Carol was standing next to a tall man, the man riling up the crowd with a speech he didn't care to pay attention to, he had a fresh looking wound on his face, his head was wrapped and he had a gauze pad over his eye but blood was still leaking down his face. Was it from one of the others? Had they all been caught? He glanced around but he seemed to be the only one in the makeshift arena, besides his captors. Daryl hoped they weren't, he liked the Korean kid. Hell, he liked all of them to varying degrees. Even the pig Rick Grimes. And if the others weren't caught Daryl knew he was on his own. There was no way Shane was going to let Rick break his 'we don't go back rule.' Besides, he was hardly worth saving. Daryl felt a smidge of respect for the man who kept his group together without using fear or threats, like Shane. And the former cop had thanked Daryl for saving his life. When was the last time anybody had thanked him or anything? Plus, he hardly saved the guy's life, Rick would have been fine. Probably.

And saving Rick's life didn't matter, because Daryl hadn't been able to save the one life that mattered. And seeing Carol, her burning blue eyes and she studied him with a long buried hate, Daryl felt it all come back. He had promised Carol he would find Sophia. But after a few days Shane had wanted to move on and Merle agreed so Daryl had done what he'd always done: he followed Merle. He still remembered Carol's screams as they left her behind, how she had cursed all of them for being cowards for leaving behind a little girl. Merle had laughed and wondered how many geeks her yells would bring. Daryl wished he and Merle had simple robbed the group and moved on like they originally planned. But then the campsite outside the quarry had been attacked by a herd of geeks and suddenly Merle was Shane's number two. Merle had always enjoyed lording power over people. It was a trait he shared with their dad.

The crowd was loud, and he didn't think Carol would hear him, but he said it anyway, "'m sorry." Carol looked shocked.

While keeping eye contact with her, Daryl missed seeing the man take a swing at him until it was too late. Daryl rolled with the punch, forgetting about the barrier of geeks surrounding him. He rolled into grasping hands and kicked out in panic but the geek's grasp didn't break his skin. The geek didn't have any fingernails, or teeth for that matter. Daryl kicked the geek away before he scrambled to his feet and threw himself at his attacker. The crowd roared as he put up a fight, cheering and jeering, and it sounded like they were chanting 'Martinez.' 'Martinez' turned to the crowd and raised his hands asking for more noise. Clearly he didn't think Daryl was a threat and Daryl burned at the slight. He tried to rush Martinez, but he put Daryl on the ground again and he barely managed to roll out of the way of a kick.

The clink of a can sounded near his head and Daryl looked over to see a canister rolling towards him. He recognized that canister, he had found the stockpile himself while exploring the prison and remembered shoving an armful in the duffle as they prepared to head out to rescue the others. Smoke was already pouring out of the canister. There must have been more than one can because smoke quickly filled the air as Daryl pulled his shirt up to cover his nose and mouth.

He was getting to his knees when a hand grabbed his upper arm and yanked him to his feet. "C'mon lil' brother!" Merle.

Daryl did his best to keep up as Merle hauled him away from the arena and the screams. Gunfire sounded. Daryl saw Sasha shooting indiscriminately into the air and heard Rick yell a retreat as the panicked crowd dispersed around them.

"You came back," Daryl half stated, half questioned as Merle hauled him out of sight. "But the rule."

"Officer Friendly don't care much for rules," Merle smirked as Sasha and Rick fell in behind them. The sword wielder, Michonne was there too. "Don't be too eager, we've been left behind and it's a long walk back to the prison."

It was early, the sun was barely up, but Beth couldn't sleep. Waiting was agonizing. Earlier, waiting on her sister's unknown fate had been bad, but this was torture. Rick had willingly gone into an unknown, dangerous situation against people who were better armed and organized than them. Beth paced along the fence between the concrete yard and grassy slope. She couldn't stop picturing Rick all those months ago when they returned to King's County, Rick had been on the ground and that man standing over him with a gun pointed at Rick's head. And this time she wouldn't be there to crack a board over the man's head.

"You're really worried about my dad," Carl interrupted as she passed by Carl and Duane again.

It seemed no one was sleeping in this morning. Beth briefly wondered how long the two boys had been up. Of course she was really worried about Rick. "Yeah," Beth nodded.

"So you really like him. You like, like him."

Beth couldn't help herself as she stopped to look Carl in the eye, "I love him. I love him and I never said it, because I was scared of what his answer would be, especially since your mom was still out there somewhere." Beth said through frustrated tears.

Carl and Beth stared at each other for a moment, letting the shouts and the sounds of an engine sink in before they both took off for the path leading to the gate, Duane fast on their heels. The truck was back, most of the prison gathered around it as it came to a stop. Beth did a headcount as she approached: Shane was in the driver's seat, Maggie was helping Glenn out, and Oscar was in the bed of the truck. "Where are the others? Where's Rick?" Beth asked, a bit of hysteria colored her voice.

Maggie left Glenn with their dad and pulled Beth into a tight hug, which did little to make Beth feel better. "Where's Rick?" She repeated.

"I'm sorry Bethy, I was so wrong about Rick," Maggie's words were muffled by Beth's hair but they were clear as day to Beth. She began to feel panic creeping up, her lungs couldn't get air and her head felt light. Rick couldn't be dead, he just couldn't.

"Where's Sasha?" Tyreese's panicked voiced asked.

"Daryl was separated from us. The others elected to stay behind to look for him while I brought Glenn back for medical attention," Shane offered.

"Elected?" Tyreese asked. His voice boomed and he stood before Shane looking every inch of the defensive lineman he used to be.

"Your sister insisted on stayin' behind when Rick told her to come with me," Shane responded, he didn't appear to be intimidated by Tyreese's size or glare. "

You couldn't've waited?" Lori asked. Shane looked startled to see her, Judith was wrapped up in a blanket against Lori's chest but the baby didn't detract from Lori's own intimidating glare.

"I had to get Glenn back here," Shane replied, a little less sure.

"I would've been fine," Glenn spoke up from where Hershel was prodding at his face.

"Well, Glenn's here now, so go on back and get them," Lori's voice was sharp as she continued to glare at Shane.

"No," Shane shook his head. "We ain't goin' back. Rick knew we weren't waitin'. He's got our best trackers. They'll find their way back. And that's the last I'll hear on it!"

Beth didn't stick around to hear any more of the argument, she wanted to be alone. She wanted to cry and scream and rage. She quickly ran back into the prison. She headed back to her cell, their cell, and sank down in the corner against the cool concrete and cried.

Lori, of all people, settled down next to Beth still cradling Judith to her chest. It could have been minutes or hours later, Beth wasn't sure. She felt awful, her face had to be a swollen mess from crying. Beth gave Lori an unsure look in greeting. Lori was silent for a few moments, adjusting the sleeping Judith so they were both comfortable against the cement wall.

When Lori did finally speak, it startled Beth, "Before Rick was shot I wanted a divorce. I was tired of our lack of communication and how he cared more about his job than me and Carl." Beth stared at Lori in shock. Divorce was an ugly word in her family, and Beth couldn't even imagine wanting to leave Rick. Lori continued, "But then… my biggest fear came true and Rick was shot. He was a mess; blood swelling in the brain, medically induced coma, the doctors didn't think he was going to survive the first twenty-four hours. And… I knew it then, that I couldn't live without Rick. And he pulled through," Lori let out a bitter laugh that seemed like a physical blow to Beth.

"But then everything went down and Shane told me that the army was at the hospital and they had turned off the power and that… Rick was gone. He was gone. And I was broken. I tried so hard to be a good mom for Carl, but I was lost. And Shane was there for us, playing at good dad with Carl, being sweet to me… and I gave in. Lost myself with him." Lori shook her head, she seemed so resigned it made Beth ache for her. "And then Rick comes along, looking hale as ever." Lori let out another acidic chuckle.

Beth tried to keep the look of utter shock off her face. She had no idea what to say. Should she say something? Should she comfort Lori? "What I'm telling you is, don't do what I did. Stay strong and don't get lost. Don't give up hope on Rick Grimes. He'll make it," Lori patted Beth's knee. Lori looked forlorn, Lori knew what she had lost. Lori still had feelings for Rick, that much was obvious. Beth wasn't angry, she felt awful for Lori. Lori had been through so much. Didn't she deserve some happiness? But Lori's happiness would be Beth's ruin.

Hours later found Beth back in the yard. She was with Carl and Duane, hoping the two could distract her and keep her from her thoughts. Her brain was a mess over Rick and Lori and she didn't want to hear herself think anymore.

It was late afternoon, and everyone at the prison was trying to go on about their business as if there wasn't a giant hole in the group. Morgan had gone to the back of the prison, taking Oscar, they were trying to block up the back better. Walkers were still getting in through the back making clearing the prison impossible. Andrea and Axel weren't too far from Beth, they were hanging sheets out to dry. Beth and the boys were doing math, and neither of them were complaining, which just went to show Beth how unfocused they were on the task. But still she forged ahead. She had enjoyed math in school, up until it became too abstract with sine, cosine and tangent. She was standing behind the boys as they all stared at the one math book they had from the prison library.

The shock of the sound of a bullet being fired had Beth reacting on instinct. She dove behind the picnic table grabbing Carl and Duane as she went. They hit the pavement hard, Duane landed on his shoulder awkwardly and let out a cry of pain and Beth's knees sang in pain as she landed on them. More gunfire sounded validating Beth's extreme response.

It wasn't until Carl's panicked, "Mom!" that Beth looked around. Lori had been rocking Judith as she took a lap around the yard but now she was on the ground and there was blood spreading on the pavement. Beth couldn't see Judith. She told Carl to stay with Duane before half crawling half running to Lori's prone form. She skidded to Lori's side, Lori had collapsed on her stomach and Beth rolled her to her side enough to reveal she was still cradling Judith.

Judith let out a wail and it stirred Lori. Lori had been hit, there was blood all over her front and all over Judith. Lori let out a gasp as Beth pulled Judith from her arms. It was difficult to tell if the baby was actually injured, there was so much blood everywhere. Lori reached for Beth and pulled her lower, her grip was strong and her expression wild eyed. "Beth. You have to take care of Judith," She panted.

"It's okay Lori, everything is going to be okay," Beth did her best to ignore the gunfire around them. "You're gonna be fine. We'll get you to Daddy and you'll be fine." Lori became blurry, it took a moment for Beth to realize it was because she was crying.

"Beth, please, take care of—" Lori was cut off as another bullet hit her, this time in the low back. Lori screamed in pain and tugged Beth down next to her. Beth huddled against Lori, Judith was in her arms crying and Beth shaking. Lori was hit again, Beth couldn't stop staring into her eyes as Lori gasped at her, choking on blood.

Beth didn't know how long she laid there. Long enough for the life to leave Lori's eyes. Long enough for Judith to stop crying. She didn't know when the gunfire stopped, she wasn't aware of anything until a hand gripped her shoulder yelling her name. Beth sat up with her father's help, Judith still cradled in her arms. It sounded like her father was underwater as he asked if she was okay.

"I'm okay," which was a lie. She wasn't shot but she wasn't okay. Beth turned her gaze to Judith. The baby's eyes were watery with tears and Beth finally began checking her over for wounds as her father tended to Lori. She couldn't find her voice to tell her father it was no use.

Lori was gone.

AN: I went there. Technically, Robert Kirkman went there first.

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