I do not own the Simpsons.
Enjoy!
Both Lisa and Bart rolled to their previous seats and walked back to them like nothing happened.
Everybody didn't know weither they rolled to get out of the spotlight or just couldn't be bothered to fully fight.
There was silence as the principle came back.
"We'll, please take care of them and show them a great time on earth" said Principle Skinner. "You are dismissed' and can their teachers take them to their classrooms, please?"
The teachers and the kids stared at them as they slowly came out with their teachers, everybody parted way and than followed.
Some kids had to be told to leave them alone.
Bart went into his old classroom and sat down in his old seat, however today wouldn't be a regular day.
Every kid was staring at him, even the teacher was trying not to look.
Bart didn't know what was more shocking about him now, his expensive clothes or the fact that he claimed to be from another planet.
"Now, children. We all have to remember that even though we have somebody who is different on the inside. I'm sure he just wants to be viewed just like everybody else" said Miss Krabappel. "Let's do the register and I must say welcome to planet Earth, Alberto"
And then they began.
Bart felt mischievous and he put his elbow on the desk with a thoughtful look as kids began to shout.
"Alberto...I can't read the other words" said Enda.
"It's alright. It's not possible for a human to pronounce my last name anyway, just go by my first name" he said before he said. "Here!"
Everybody stared.
"Did I get it wrong? We have gone through 3 students in 45 seconds so I naturally assumed the remaining 72 percent would answer with the word 'Here'" he said.
Huh?
So many kids mouths were open along with the teacher.
He had been alive for 41 years, it was time to stop acting like a morn.
"That is correct, Alberto" said Enda stunned to have encountered a Bart look a like who was doing math in his speech.
And than she continued.
Everybody was still looking.
When she started teaching, it was probably because he was in the room that she was unusually peppy instead dozening off.
She put sheets on the table and told them to fill it in, and than she sat back and turned to stare at Bart instead of reading her book.
He wanting to have fun, he picked the paper up and flipped it, everybody was wondering what he was doing, and than he put pen to paper and began to write.
He must have been writing for 2 minutes before he stopped and put his hand up.
"Yes, Alberto?" said Enda.
"What happens when we have finished the worksheet? Do we put it on the desk?" He said.
He stunned the woman and the class.
"Your finished?" She said
"Yes" he said in an emotionless tone.
She got up and walked to it, she took the sheet and saw words filling the paper.
She read and was stunned.
It was an essay of somebody who knew history back and front.
"You wrote this?" She said.
"Is it's wrong?" He said.
"It's correct. Have you ever done an IQ test?" She said, she shocking the whole class even Bart.
Yes he had and tanked.
"What's an IQ test?" He said, foreign ignorance. "It was not covered in Earth classes"
"We'll, you need one" said Enda. "I'll have a sheet somewhere"
He watched her go to her desk, and get out something that was dusty.
She brushed it and than gave him two sheets.
"Please answer on the dotted sheet and not one with word's" she said. "You have until lunch."
And she started, he looked at the sheet.
The boy who everybody around him called special or an idiot was retaking the IQ test.
Bart had fallen over and over again, got test after test wrong but only Kang and Kodos know that Bart Iq had risen, they had been raising the test level so that he could keep failing with the occasional win.
So what happens when he takes it again in Earth standand?
# Scene change#
Lisa thanked god she didn't trip and ruin the start of her new debute, she wondered if her makeup was okay.
She let a machine do it this morning.
However to the other kids, her new image was working, she was coming off cool.
She was wearing branded clothes, makeup and hooped earrings.
And she did not once try to correct the teacher.
Lisa finally could use the stop button on her brain to stop herself from opening her mouth and correcting somebody.
She didn't have to before because the days would start all over again but she was out now and determined to change her image.
She made sure to take her time when filling things out and kept her mouth shut, she had some break food and than went back to keeping her mouth shut and looking like she didn't care for what was going on.
Lunch came.
She was about to get up, when everybody else did faster.
"Do you want to have lunch for me?" Said one of the most popular girls. "Your pretty cool"
"Please, I'm not that desperate to have friends" she said, even though she was, she than walked out feeling badass while doing so.
She knew what it was like to be popular and she was working it, she found her brother inside the cafteria and sat next to him.
Thank god they weren't forced to have questionable edible cafteria food, they opened their lunchboxs and got out their food.
It was glowing but Bart didn't seem to mind.
She took a bite only for a smile to creep onto her face.
It was absolutely delicious.
"It's good right? Way better than the food from the cafteria" said Bart.
The smell of their food just hit all the people in the cafteria nostrals and had some drooling.
They finished and went out to play outside.
Only to find about a dozen pair of eyes turn their way immediantly.
Everybody stared as they came close, Bart took out his game console and Lisa sat down, reading the holographic book.
Suddenly Bart heard.
"Hi, I'm Milhouse"
He turned to see his best friend for years in the simulation.
"Milhouse?" He said, acting like he didn't want to hug him.
"Yeah, Milhouse. Milhouse Van Houten" said Milhouse. "What are you playing?"
"Some game called Space Zombies 3" he said.
"Woah, that just came out" said Milhouse.
"Do you want to play?" He said surprising him. "I can slit my console"
And than he pressed a button and before many eyes, the console duplicated many times.
"Who wants to play space zombies with me?" He said.
Suddenly there was a large.
"Me!" From the boys.
Everybody got one, and Bart didn't care because he had the master console, the moment he pressed the button again, they would dissappear and nobody could take it home.
Meanwhile, Lisa found herself being bothered.
She saw shadows blocking her light.
"Yes?" She said, seeing Sherri and Terri.
Once upon a time she was clamouring for their attention but now she felt like she was too old for their nonsense.
"Can we sit with you?" They said.
"Sure, it's not like I care" she said.
They came to sit with other girls.
"So where did you get your clothes from?" Said Terri.
"Don't know? Closet" said Lisa. "I don't keep track of what I buy"
"You buy your own clothes?" Said Sherri.
"I see something, I buy it." said Lisa. "You know, like what. Getting stuff sucks but somebody has to get it"
"Totally" the girls said.
"She's so cool. So much better than that Lisa" whispered Sherri not knowing Lisa could hear her.
Her eyes dropped.
Fantastic.
# Scene Change#
The neighbours took the time to inspect the house.
"And what is this?" Said Doctor Hibbert.
"It's my left arm" said Marge, moving it away.
"Sorry. My husband was just so excited to meet you" said the man wife. "Your a scientific discovery. We've never met a woman who had blue hair that moves"
"Yes, very unique specimen" said the doctor. "I hope, when you get sick that you come to me. I would love to see how you work"
And Marge excused herself to talk to the Van Houten.
"Their aliens and they have much nicer coats than us" said Mrs Houten to her husband. "How bad are you messing up?"
And Kirk lowered his head.
"Excuse me, where's the bathroom?" Said Ned.
"Oh, I'll show you" said Marge and than she went to where the kitchen is and pressed her palm to the wall and said. "Bathroom please"
Before their eyes, the kitchen switched to the inside of a really nice bathroom.
"Oooh" they said.
"I'll go first" said Scott Weingarten.
They all cramed in.
"You must come to our book club" said Sarah Wiggum.
"I'll would love to join your book club" she said, "From what little I've seen of Earth Books, it looked very exciting"
"Great. Than I'll give you the book title for this week" she said.
That's when they heard a ding and Marge was reminded of what he baked.
"Who wants organic healthy muffins on a healthy organic tray?" Said Marge. "I cooked it from a human cookbook"
"Me" they all said.
# Scene Change#
"We have a new friend joining us today" said an actual teacher. "Her name is Ashley and she cant talk yet but the machine say she's brilliant"
Maggie waved to the class, before she held up two blocks that said. "HI"
They clapped.
"Anyway, let's begin to do the register and than we do math while you all eat cupcakes" said the teacher and the kids cheered.
Maggie could almost cry.
# Scene Change#
Homer sat down at his old job and for some reason he grew tired of being lazy for 31 years.
He needed to shake it up a bit.
For the first time, he actually looked at the manual and found out what he should be doing, he made adjustments as he read, making the power plant safer as he did so and saving his boss money in case the health inspector came or their was a lawsuit.
It took him all the way to lunch.
He stretched and than walked out, carrying his lunchbox to the lunchroom.
He saw his friends.
"Hiya, fella's" he said.
However the whole room of active people went silent.
Homer got the feeling they were talking about him just seconds later, he sat down uncomfortably and opened his lunch box, getting out a glowing sandwich.
He took a bite.
Flavour burst into his mouth, it was ham, roast beef, sausage, lamb chops and stake all rolled into one.
He began to eat, he had 8 more sandwiches.
Who knew being an alien meant he got to eat such delicious meals?
Suddenly he heard.
"Uh, hi"
He turned to see Carl going to sit next to him along with Leni.
"Interesting glowing sandwich" said Lenny.
"Thanks." Said Homer. "I would offer one but I don't know what it would do to you. However I do have a box of mini donuts if anybody would like one?'
He got it out and the moment everybody saw the massive transparent box, those unsure about him came forward.
He had more than enough for everybody.
"Your alright Hoover" said Carl, eating a donut. "I'm Carl Carlson and this my friend Lenny Leonard"
"How did you pull out something so large in something so small?" Said Lenny.
"I have a demensional pocket in a flap, see" said Homer, he opened it and then turned for the guys to see.
They saw a swirling vortex.
"Oooh" all of them said.
"Have you ever had Beer before?" Said Lenny.
"What's Beer?" He said, despite wanting to scream 'Give me Beer!'.
"You don't know what Beer is? Than that's the first thing we got to show you" said Carl.
"Beer is a part of Earth's culture. We will happily take you to Moe's." Said Lenny.
"Can we do it tommrow? It's my first day on Earth and I wont hear the end of it, if I bailed on family" said Homer, there was too many times he had seen that look from Marge.
"Oh, that's fine than" said Lenny.
# Time Skip#
All of them sat having dinner and eating around the table, the food was so good that nobody could be bothered to talk.
Only moan their appreciation.
When they were finished, they heard the voice of Legion.
"So how was your first day back on Earth, my Legomitea?" Said the voice.
Suddenly all of them began talking over each other, but than he said.
"One at a time"
Lisa went first. "Master, all the popular kids went to be my friend and they invited me to the mall with them after school"
Bart said. "Things haven't really changed for me, Master. Except my teacher is looking at me differently now"
"Master. I managed to make friends with all the guys at work and Mr Burns remembers my name today." Said Homer.
Maggie sucked and took out her pacifier and said. "I got into the gifted group"
She could talk, of course she could.
"Master. I got to make friends with all the neighbours and it wasn't because of my husband" said Marge. "I got a book meeting coming up." Before she said. "Thank you for given us all a second chance, Master. It's feels good to have everybody look at us with fresh eyes"
Before this, she was haunted by suspicious eyes.
Now, the neighbours even waved as she walked by.
Although the awe of seeing her would pass with time.
"No problem, your all very entertaining for me. I haven't been this entertained since the war of Glaxtimo" he said, laughing. "I've just come to inform you that I've updated your calender to show the holidays of the planet and what is expected on this holiday. However, I don't think it's wise for you all to convert back to Christianity if you have to go to Church" he paused and said. "Your bodies have been formed out many spices including human so... I don't think the earth God will handle it well."
"Oh, dear Lord" said Marge.
"Cool. My skin says I'm going to hell" Said Bart.
"So yeah. It's not a good idea to convert" said the man. "However, if you want to attend church than it's fine with me, but you are expected to pray to me on Sundays. It can be 2 minutes long to 20 if you want. Just pray"
"Wait, we don't have to go to Church on Sundays but get to pray to a war lord for 2 minutes instead?" Said Bart. "Take me to Hell"
"Bart!" Said Marge.
Homer looked at the new calender.
"Holy crap, Marge." said Homer. "It says here that next Sunday its love day. On our planet there is a 60 discount for couples. I can finally get you a proper wedding ring and we can stay in a five star hotel."
Marge was stunned.
What?
Was there really a holiday and not an excuse for people to buy useless junk?
Homer turned his screen to her and she saw an advert for a lovely hotel that promised to babysit any kids, he swipped to show her rings that were just gorgeous but they were really expensive, however when she calculated the discount, even she could afford it at minium wage on Earth.
"Oooh" she said.
"Are we really going to abandon our beliefs for alien holidays?" Said Lisa.
Her mother was really going to throw away her beliefs for a nice life?
"Lisa, I'm sure you'll be interested in this one" said Bart. "There's a national helpers day. You get given clothes and give them to the homeless. For every clothes you give, you save one animal from the chopping block but that's only if you join the planets main religion" before he said. "But I'm sure your fine, worshipping other gods and trying to find the perfect time to give up your earthly possession, it will be worth it in the next life. Even though you don't know, if you'll ever reincarnate because of that abnomination of a body of yours because it's most likely haunted by the hatred of those master killed, to craft it. Im sure it won't drag you to hell even if your a good person all your life. Your god's will surely accept an abomination of nature, right? Buddhist all the way"
Silence.
Wow, even Legion was impressed,
Lisa may speak Bart but Bart could speak Lisa when the situation counts for it.
Lisa suddenly looked nervous as she said. "How many people did you kill?"
"I stopped counting but there were definitely babies in there. Lots and Lots of Babies" he said.
And hearing that Lisa looked like she wanted to jump off a cliff.
In the Buddhist realm her name dissappeared from the list.
It wouldn't be the first time, she switched beliefs.
And scene!