Chapter Twelve

Confronting Feelings

Battousai's POV

It was a rather dark night for the outskirts of Kyoto. Dark clouds swirled ominously in the sky over head, whipping up as fierce storm within its black depths. White hot electricity sent sparks flying through the abyss, and summoned forth huge, clashing waves of thunder. It was suiting weather for the events that soon would take place on this night. Below the raging storm a single carriage traveled along the blood stained battle grounds of a warring nation. Within the carriage pulled by two black stallions were twelve men. They were disguised in tattered cloaks and commoners clothes, but these men were not weak commoners. They were a specialized group of shadow assassins employed by the Choshu clan. Twelve of the most dangerous men in the Bakumatsu era: among them the Battousai. This formidable group were heading to General Eito's enemy camp. The orders were clear; dispose of the general, and destroy the base.

Inside of the carriage the men were whispering anxiously amongst themselves. Each of them knew that this mission was at the very least risky business. The Choshu was making a very bold move against the Shinsengumi. Sending the message that let the enemy know they were not finished, and that they would be the victor in this war. It would result in a turning point for the revolution, and even more bloodshed in the name of their wondrous cause. Kenshin bowed his head forward, silently listening to the idle chatter. He crossed his hands over the hilt of his katana that stood in front of him. As far as whether or not the other men could complete their assignments was not any concern. It wouldn't matter so long as Kenshin was able to slay the general.

The carriage came to a halt. This was it, they had made it into the camp, now was the most challenging trial. The low babbling of the men fell into a deathly silence as they awaited their next move. Outside they could hear a soft, muffled conversation between the driver and a soldier "Refugees huh?" The warrior said loudly "Mind if we take a look for ourselves?" The driver responded with a humble yes. Each and every one of the samurai inside became tense as each crunch of the soldier's boots became closer. Kenshin narrowed his eyes on the door, his hand slipping around his sword. The reality of this situation had sunk in. There was no turning back now. Click. The latch on the door turned, and in slow motion swung open revealing a Shinsengumi samurai. Now! Kenshin was the first to move. Summoning his sword from its sheath he vanished before the other's eyes, and reappeared behind the unsuspecting samurai. Without hesitance he rammed his sword clean through the man's neck. Blood sprayed across the walls and floors, splattering on to some of the men inside the carriage. Kenshin removed his blade and allow the dead body to collapse to the ground. Flicking his katana clean Kenshin returned the blade to its sheath, and disappeared once again. In his wake he left behind a group of assassins who would finish what he had started. He was the flame that ignited the fire.

Kenshin took to the shadows around the base, merging into the darkness. Each footfall made was as silent as the night itself, every move made carefully calculated. He was no more than a phantom to the unsuspecting men within the camp. Yet from him they would have nothing to fear, he simply didn't have the time for those soldiers. Kenshin's mission was the general. The others would be a waste of time. At last the assassin settled against the wall of a huge compound stationed in the middle of the camp. This is where Katsura's informant said the general resided. For the war's sake Kenshin hoped that he was right. Kneeling down he leaned forward, blocking all the outside distractions from his mind, and focusing all of his concentration to the room on the other side of that thin wall. From within he could tell that there was at least one man there. The low, steady breathing accompanied by an occasional snore told the assassin that the general was sound asleep. Silently Kenshin crept forward, and slid the outside shoji screen open. Stepping into the room he was relieved to find good old Eito snuggled into the bed roll stationed in the center of the room.

Years ago when there was talk of peace, and rumors of the war ending Kenshin had met General Eito. At that time he had been employed as a body guard for Katsura during the meeting, just in case all didn't go as plan. It hadn't. Most of the men sitting at that table were willing to end the war then and there. However, three of the generals—including Eito—were not enticed by a peaceful ending. Those three caused quite an up stir in the meeting room. Finally the talk of peace ended with one of the generals pulling their sword on Katsura, and Kenshin promptly rammed his katana straight through the man's chest. Everyone in the room knew at that moment that a treaty would never come to pass. The talk of peace had ended with that man's life.

Kenshin lingered over the man whom he would soon kill, and placed a steady hand on the hilt of his katana. He looked down into the withered, old face of the man below him. This is what too many years of war would do to a man. It would slowly devour him. Consuming his humanity, his soul like a greedy parasite until he is left with nothing but a tired, worn caucus. When Kenshin looked at General Eito he saw the same fate within his future. One day he too would be devoured. Pulling his blade from its sheath Kenshin allowed the katana to however right above his target's forehead. May God have mercy on your soul, Eito. Without hesitating he sent the blade plunging down into the man's head. A sick grinding sound made only by steel crushing through bone resounded loudly in his ears, but it was easily ignored. Warm blood soaked the legs of his hakama, and seeped from a stained pillow to the wooden floor beneath his dead body. Twisting his sword to the right Kenshin freed his blade. Now then, it seems I have another to tend to. Turning a simmering ember gaze to the open doorway on the other side of the room, Kenshin made eye contact with a young standing there. The boy's katana was positioned defensively, and ever so slightly trembling "You." He mumbled "The red hair, the god like speed… You're the Battousai." The boy seethed, his words dripping in an almost personal kind of hatred.

"I am." Kenshin replied in a low baritone. He had to admit that this boy had caught his attention. Not many who knew his identity would stand and face him like this.

"You murdered her, my beloved fiancé Tomoe." His foot fell back preparing him for the sprint forward he would make. The boy looked up his coal black eyes raging with unrestrained anger "For that you shall pay!" He yelled launching his body forward. Kenshin's ability to dodge this attack was not a factor in question, but instead it was his willingness. This boy was her betrothed. That traitor, that woman, that innocent that had met her untimely death at the end of his blade. It was a consuming guilt that had rooted the slayer to the floor beneath him, allowing that young hatred-ridden boy to slice his blade across Kenshin's pale cheek. Kenshin should have felt the sharp steel penetrate his flesh, he should have felt the sting, a slight pain, but there was nothing. He felt nothing as fresh blood slid down his cheek, and dripped from his chin "This is for Tomoe!" Feeling the boy's solid presence behind him Kenshin was thrown back into reality. Snapping out of his self-loathing trance Kenshin turned around, his katana in hand, and drew the sword across the boy's stomach. Dark, crimson blood sprayed across his face and Tomoe's fiancé crumble to the floor in front of him. "To…moe I'm sorry…"He breathed before drowning in his own blood. The thick, sticky substance bubbled up from his lips, and overflowed down the side of his face.

Kenshin flicked his sword clean and sheathed the katana. The mission was over.

Kaoru's POV

"Yahiko do you…" Want some breakfast? Kaoru smiled warmly at her younger brother who was slumped over her desk, his head buried into his arms, and his shoulders moving accordingly with his soft snoring. Since his arrival Yahiko had insisted on helping her in the clinic. Today Kaoru had finally agreed to his offer, and had watched in amusement as her assistant had to walk him through nearly every procedure. It was particularly entertaining when his face light up bright red every time Ayame moved a little too close to him. Kaoru sensed that Yahiko may have a little crush on her assistant. Pulling a sheet from one of the cots the doctor draped it over the sleeping boy. She truly had missed her little brother, and having him around those past few days meant a great deal to her. It seemed to prove therapeutic to the doctor. Having Yahiko there had relaxed her greatly, and for the first time in months she was starting to feel more at home. Eyeing a bucket of dirty supplies Kaoru knew that they would have to be cleaned soon. After all come later in the morning she would have an onslaught of returning soldiers.

Picking up the bucket Kaoru exited the clinic alone. Unlike the Battousai, Saito seemed to have an end of the work day. Around eight he would dismiss himself. It was something that Kaoru found strange, especially since she was so used to the Battousai's constant hovering. Yet at the same time she wouldn't complain about Saito's absence in the evening. Kaoru quickly discovered that she wasn't very keen on his company. The Battousai was unbearably silent, but never had he been rude to her. Saito, on the other hand, was particularly rude and taunting of her capabilities. Especially as a doctor. He hadn't made it a secret that he disapproved of her work, and so come eight o'clock Kaoru had become relieved to see him leave. She absolutely hated how he would stand off to the side sneering disdainfully with each diagnosis she gave, and how he would talk badly of her practice. It was in those moments when she began to understand why the Battousai didn't like him. Saito had proven to not be a very likeable person. His more than unsavory attitude made her miss the Battousai's overwhelming, wordless presence.

A light pink dusted across the bridge of her nose and Kaoru paused for a moment on the slender garden path, consequently this rest took place beside the koi pond. Her sapphire eyes carefully studied the shallow depths of the pond. Sitting her load down onto the soft dirt path, Kaoru took a moment to process everything that had happened in the last couple of days. He kissed me here. She mused as her fingers lightly traced her bottom lip. Since that night Kaoru hadn't really had the time to ponder on the fact that something was happening between her in the Battousai. Before that kiss she had noticed the way he seemed to watch her, his eyes lingering just a second to long. She had took note of the way he refused to leave her side as if he was afraid something would happen to her, and how his lips would curl into a small crooked smile when she did something clumsy, yet it would only last for a fraction of a second as if he didn't want her to see him do so. Until that kiss Kaoru had worried that she was just imagining things. After all, if she was being honest with herself, Kaoru was growing to adore her protector and it would make sense for her to want to see those things. However as he caught her in his arms, looking down at her with those venerable amethyst eyes Kaoru had realized then that she was seeing something that no one had ever saw before. Then he kissed her and all suspicions were confirmed.

With a secretive smile Kaoru summoned forth that endearing memory from several nights ago. His hands had been so gentle, hesitant, and careful. Something she wouldn't have expected from a man who was best described as a demonic force, but that sense of absolute respect he showed her spoke a thousand words. He had knocked down those barriers, let her in, and allowed her to see his humanity. Kaoru had understood what that moment meant for him, but she was also aware of the fact that she was in control. She would never truly be able to explain how she knew, but Kaoru just had this instinctual feeling that if she was to pull away he would release her. However, Kaoru hadn't wanted to leave his arms. The truth was that she was hoping he would kiss her that night, and then he did.

It had been quite the experience for her. Kaoru determined that she would never forget the moment that his lips had touched hers. It had been sweet, tender, and sensual. Something that would forever be unforgettable for the doctor. She had felt something indescribable whenever his lips touched hers. Her heart was pounding against her ribs, her stomach was fluttering, and her entire body was enveloped by this reassuring warmth. It was as if the entire world had melted away, leaving just the two of them to be devoured by this new found emotion. That feeling is consuming, dangerous, and addictive. Kaoru sighed whimsically as she recalled the way he looked under the moonlight. His pale skin had been illuminated by gentle light of a full moon, casting shadows against the contrast of his muscles, and producing an opaque glow around his shoulders and strong jaw line. Then there was that beautiful crimson hair framing those captivating amethyst eyes. It was a stunning, dreamy image that she fell victim to. How could she have resisted such a courteous and handsome man?

Admittedly Kaoru hadn't the slightest idea where this forming relationship would lead her, but one thing was clear: she wanted to be by his side. Whether they would fall in love, or simply remain friends Kaoru hoped beyond all the odds that she would be able to stay with him. That night he had proved to her that there was so much more than a slayer below the surface. Within that dark, bloodstained soul lied a man whom struggled with maintaining his humanity. Kaoru had a theory that all these years serving the military had put a strain on his moral meter. Killing was wrong, but necessary. Humans were not wired to cope with such violent things such as gruesome murders. They are fragile creatures. So then how was he dealing with such a darkened lifestyle? Kaoru had seen him at his worst, the way he had lost all control when he nearly slit Saito's throat. Then somehow she was able to talk him down, bring him back from wherever he was trapped. The moment he realized she was there Kaoru had noticed the complete change in his demeanor.

From a doctor's stand point Kaoru had read very little about the effects of war on one's psychological welfare. At this point in medical advancement most scholars refuse to recognize the power of a human brain. Kaoru had even thought that those psychological studies were merely a joke, then she saw it for herself with the Battousai. There had only been a single study on multi personality disorder, and that study hadn't even been completed because it was determined inconclusive. Yet based on what she had read Kaoru was nearly convinced that he was suffering from a trauma induced psychosis. This realization made her resolution even stronger than before. She knew that being with him was playing with fire. He was unpredictable, but that would not stray her from the feelings she had. Kaoru cared greatly for him, and so long as the Battousai would allow her to stay she would do just that. She wanted to help him. She wanted to free him from himself. Above all she wanted to remind him that he was still very human.

Glancing down to her abandoned tools Kaoru decided that she needed to finish the task at hand, the moon was already starting to leave the sky. Shaking her thought's free Kaoru rounded the koi pond, and continued on to the well. Sitting her bucket onto the grass beneath her Kaoru knelt down to the tub, and began her nightly cleansing ritual. Distantly she could hear the symphony composed by frogs and crickets. Softly Kaoru began humming to herself, a familiar unknown tune that she had once heard long ago. Smiling she worked on scrubbing the blood-encrusted tools clean. Halfway done with the bucket of tools Kaoru was stopped by the sudden banging of the garden gate.

Moving to her feet Kaoru turned facing the gate, curious to see who this early morning visitor was. Squinting her eyes the doctor concentrated on the man who had just entered her quiet abode. Is that…? Her heart gave a heavy, little thump as the rising sun in the distance slowly revealed a familiar head of red hair. Battousai… Acting purely on a whim Kaoru went to welcome him back, however as she approached the slayer two very concerning details became clear. One was that he was injured. A deep gash on his left cheek that seemed to still be bleeding. The Second was that his typically guarded ember eyes had let down their defenses. In fact as he tilted his head up to look at her, his eyes conveyed a battered man.

"Battousai?" She asked faintly. Battousai stepped forward, closing the few feet between them and pulled her into his arms. Kaoru wasn't sure what had happened during that mission, but she didn't dare push him away. If he didn't need her at that moment then he would have passed on by, but he didn't. Without a word she wrapped one arm around his waist, and the other around his neck, plunging her hand into his sleek red hair. This was such an intimate way to hold someone that Kaoru couldn't help the blush that heated her cheeks; however, at the same time it was as if she had done this a hundred times, as if this was simply a normal experience for her. Despite the fact that she had only been this close to him once before Kaoru could feel his appreciation radiating from his body.

His head collapsed onto her shoulder as she instinctively pressed her lips against his forehead. Nothing in this world could make her reject anything he did right now "Welcome back." Kaoru murmured kindly. For the longest time they simply stood there holding one another. Whatever had happened on that battle field seemed to have truly upset him, and Kaoru couldn't help the flash of anger she felt toward Katsura for sending him out there. How dare he subject him to this! Mentally she made a note to have a discussion with the commander about his blatant negligent abuse of his soldiers, but for the moment she turned her attention to the damaged man in her arms. Daringly she ran her hand through his thick mass of hair, from the top of his head to the very ends. She was testing her limits with this, but once she saw that he wasn't going to protest Kaoru repeated the movement. Again and again she ran her fingers carelessly through his hair, cherishing the fact that he was allowing her to do so. Finally he drew back, those ember eyes once again hardened. It was a good sign. He was going to be okay, and Kaoru was the cause of that. Kaoru beamed brightly at the Battousai, elated by her progress.

His calloused hand found her cheek, and an attentive thumb stroked the silken skin there "I… I'm sorry." The Battousai mumbled. Kaoru furrowed her brows puzzled by what would make him apologize. He hadn't offended her by any means, why would he need to give her an apology? Warm fingers traveled the expanse of her throat, sending tingling chills spiraling down her back, and rested at the edge of her kimono neck. He took the fabric between his fingers and frowned "I bled on your kimono." He explained guiltily. Kaoru glanced down at the few little droplets on her pink kimono. It was hardly anything to worry about. One good wash and it would barely be noticeable. Kaoru shook her head in disbelief. He was hurt, and yet her kimono was his greater concern. Lifting a hand to cover her mouth, Kaoru gave it her best to stifle a small giggle. He is so strange… For a second something akin to shock passed over his face. It was obvious that he didn't know what to make of her reaction.

"It will be fine." Kaoru told him as her attention was adverted to that wound on the side of his face "However," She murmured "You're hurt." Cautiously Kaoru raised her hand to his cheek, and mindfully prodded the area around the cut. Carefully she monitored his response to each deliberate touch of her fingers. Due to the fact that she had no facial changes or reactions, Kaoru decided that the wound either didn't hurt, which would mean there was no early infection setting up, or he was playing tough guy "Do you feel any pain." She asked as she continued her examination. The Battousai shook his head "Are you absolutely sure?"

"Yes." He rasped his eyes concentrated on her face.

After a few more moments of poking and prodding she was finally satisfied with the result "It doesn't look infected, but I would feel better if you would let me fix you up." Kaoru finally stated, watching with great comfort as he nodded his head in agreement "Shall we head inside then?" Another silent nod and then they were off.

A/N: Once again thank you for reading, and please leave any comments below :)