Here for another chapter, awesome. Anyway should point this out, have a big author note at the end of this chapter, so hope you enjoy and see you at the end! (Also since I'm using music I suggest listening to the songs as you read, just might help set mood more)
Listen and Wait:
The group watched as she began to play.
"She's playing piano…" Jackie wanted to lean in a bit more to listen. They all listened.
Playground school bell rings again
Rain cloud come play again
Has no one told you she's not breathing, hello
I am your mind, giving you someone to talk to, hello
"Wow she sounds so beautiful…" Loraina said surprised.
"And sad…" Brianna added as they continued to listen.
If I smile and don't believe
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream
Don't try and fix me I'm not broken, hello
I am the lie living for you so you can hide, don't cry
"She plays beautifully…" Nicolette commented.
"And full of real emotion." Jackie was saddened.
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping
Hello I'm still here
All that's left of yesterday…
Kendall ended the song and let out a breath before continuing to play another.
"Do you know the songs Jackie?" Gunther inquired.
"Not that first one, but this one is Immortal by Evanescence, however they kinda sound the same so maybe the first was also by Evanescence." Jackie replied. They nodded and continued to listen.
I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Cause your presence still lingers here and won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There is just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You use to captivate me by your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts, my once pleasant dreams,
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all your tears
When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I been alone all along
"Her voice makes you want to cry." Ramia was getting teary eyed.
"That's because these songs mean something to her…" Kick replied, watching Kendall.
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you scream I'd fight away all of you
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me….me….me….
She finished this song, then quickly got up and walked over to her ipod, scrolling through it, placing it back on the doc. She walked back to the piano.
"I wonder what song she'll do next…" Eli was curious.
"Well she's feeling heavy emotions, so probably a heavy emotional one…" Nicolette wiped some tears she had.
"Well let's find out…" Brianna quieted them down with hand gestures. Kendall pressed a button on the remote to her ipod, nothing played yet, but she began to play the piano.
Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I knew today (oou, oou)
I would hold you in my arms, I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done, forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do to hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you, but I know you won't be there
Ohh, I'm sorry for blaming you, for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
Somedays I feel broke inside
But I won't admit sometimes I just wanna hide
Cause it's you I miss, and it's hard so to say goodbye
When it comes to this, (oou, ahh)
Would you tell me I was wrong, would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me, are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance to look into your eyes,
And seeing you looking back
Oh, I'm sorry for blaming you, for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself
Oh, if I had one more day
I would tell you how much I missed you since you been away
Oh, it's dangerous. It's so out of line to try and turn back time
I'm sorry for blaming you, for everything I just couldn't do.
And I've hurt myself, by hurting you…
She let out a breath, clicking the remote.
"Wow…" Dante was shocked.
"That was deep." Mouth added.
"Who was that by?" Gunther questioned, glancing at Jackie.
"Christina Aguilera." Loraina answered. They all looked at her.
"I knew that, but how'd you know that?" Jackie asked.
"Yeah same here." Brianna mentioned.
"Wait you knew who it was by too?" Nicolette glanced at Brianna.
"Did all of you girls know who sang the song?" Eli got a weird look.
"Of course, it's Christina Aguilera." Ramia replied.
"To which she sounded beautifully and almost just like her." Nicolette said.
"Wait so what was the song?" Dante wanted to know.
"Hurt." Jackie and Brianna responded.
"Guess it's kind of fitting isn't…" Kick glanced back at Kendall. The girls nodded.
"Let's see what else she plays…" Gunther glanced as they saw Kendall get ready to play another song, the same way she did Hurt, with her ipod. Kendall began.
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did, you fell so hard
I've learned the hard way to never let it get that far
Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you, I am afraid
I lose my way and it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh every day of my life,
My heart can't possibly break, when it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you, I am afraid
I watched you die, I heard you cry, every night in your sleep
I was so young you should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else you just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thing
Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you, I am afraid
Because of you…because of you…
Kendall finished playing the piano, tears starting to come down her cheeks, she clicked the remote. She closed her eyes.
"Who do you think that song was about?" Mouth wondered.
"Probably everything she's been through…." Jackie really wanted to go hug Kendall, but couldn't and just looked down. "She let out all her emotions on that one."
"Kelly Clarkson, Because of You, and she blew it out of the water…" Nicolette was amazed with tears in her eyes.
"Ah guys…" Eli pointed, they all looked and saw Kendall had gotten up from the piano. She grabbed her ipod and started to walk towards the door.
"Hide quick." Loraina said as they scattered quickly behind the building and trees. Kendall walked out and down the path to her house, luckily not noticing them.
"That was close." Brianna breathed.
"Don't think I've ever rushed so quickly ever, not even for football." Gunther added. Jackie watched as she saw her friend disappear down the path.
"With those songs and the ones she was listening to, do you have any ideas of when she'll talk to us again?" Loraina asked. Jackie looked at her friends and sighed.
"No, but if I had to guess and be honest about it…probably won't be any time soon…" Jackie looked down.
"I was afraid of that…" Kick said. They all had a sad look as they headed back to Kick's neighborhood.
To be continued…
Hey guys glad to have brought another chapter to you, again with a bit of a serious note to it. However I should point out as it has been pointed out to me in quite a few PM's, I am in no way, shape or form taking light of the topics being brought up in this series. I know that domestic (whether in a relationship or parental) abuse is a big topic, as is depression/suicide, and I'm not using these ideas for a "good plot line" or to "catch readers attentions". I will admit do these topics make the story interesting, yes absolutely, but I would never take them lightly. I know they are serious in every shape and form. Kendall's emotions I am drawing from connections to my own and even some of my friends who helped me with aspects of this story. Is Kendall suicidal- in my mind not at all- she's just been thru pure hell- does she do a lot of self harm and stupid things that could be considered other wise, yes. That's why in chapter 42, she is curious why she is still alive, not because she wants to die, but rather because of everything she been through and all the stuff she blames herself for, she doesn't get it. But the point, this story I made is for mature audiences because it tackles many things besides going thru the romances and dealings of high school, it also goes through the ups and downs as well. So again if it seems I never give enough warning to some chapters, it's because I automatically assume my readers when they come in to read this- now ever growing long series which I hope you all are enjoying, because I love writing it- series know it's very mature and will tackle wide array of themes, while also throwing in those few curve balls. It won't fit at all perfectly into a reality genre but more so fantasy with a hint of reality thanks to issues it brings up. Anyway I thought I just speak in a whole about this and also say I really do appreciate all my readers. However, if I keep getting the PM's just know they are going to get deleted from this point on… Thank you.
L: I donk know if that applies to comments as well, but if not, then I will get you guys…anyway R&R, and see ya later! Bye. (Music- Hello and My Immortal- Evanescence, Hurt- Christina Aguilera, and Because Of You- Kelly Clarkson.)