Cool Kid Saves the Cats

Chapter V

The Phantom Purr

A beeping can be heard near Cool Kid's ears, the first time he's heard anything in quite some time. His eyes begin to open, weakly at first, showing almost nothing. All he can see is whiteness. Slowly, his vision becomes clearer. The white void begins to take shape. He now can see tables, chairs, curtains, lamps, papers on the walls, calendars maybe? He can't make out the word on them. Slowly, a tune from the right side of his head enters his ear slowly, faintly at first but quickly ramps up in volume.

"Do your best! Do your best! Do it every day! Do your best! Do your best! Do it every day! A golden rule it's a must! Always do your best! With a cheer and a smile, always do your best!"

A familiar tune to Cool Kid from his childhood. The "Good Manners Songs for Children - Do Your Best" song, the one his father always sang to him before he started crying and went to sleep. It gave him peace, and helped him concentrate on what was going on. He tried to sit up, but found that he couldn't. His body was completely confined to the bed he was in. It couldn't have been his own though. His was covered in burger stains and was also a trampoline.

Suddenly, he heard a loud scream. It was from a woman, her voice sounded like a cute puppy getting his back rubbed with a piece of toilet paper. It was soothing to his ears, but also frightening because it was a scream. He saw a human shaped body of whiteness run by. He tried to call to it, but all that came out was a groan and sobs. His head hit the pillow again, and he blacked out.

A few hours passed, and he awoke again, this time with much more energy. His vision was much clearer now, he could fully make out his environment now; he was in a hospital. A cheap one that was clearly only being funded by taxes on orange Starbursts, but still a hospital. He looked forward and finally noticed the doctor in front of him.

"How are you feeling?"

Cool Kid just stared at him in confusion. "Me?" he asked. He was surprised to hear himself talk again.

The doctor sighs in relief. "It's good to hear that you can talk, it's an amazing recovery. Honestly, I wasn't expecting you to wake up for quite some time. It's a miracle you can even still breath."

Cool kid's heart starts to race. "Wha- what do you mean? What happened to me?" Cool Kid turns his hands into his fists to show his anxiety. Or should I say fists. Cuz he only has one hand now.

"What the fidget!?" Cool kid screams as he realizes his right arm his missing.

"It's okay Cool Kid! Just try to relax, take deep breathes. You were in….an accident. We weren't given the full details, only that you were horribly damaged, and that we had to take care of you…but to also keep you entirely off the records"

"That still doesn't explain what happened to my fucking hand!"

"Truth be told Cool Kid, we don't know either. A large, strong, and handsome black gentleman brought you too us. When you arrived, your whole right arm was ripped in half by what appeared to be a Sonic the Hedgehog figurine. And you had a piece of coal lodged into your forehead."

Piece of coal? Cool Kid moved his left hand to his head and felt around. Above his right eye, there was a large lump of coal shoved into his head. Not only that, but he now has multiple cool and edgy scars going down his face. At least his awesome sunglasses were okay.

He breathes in deeply. "Doctor…. how long have I been here?"

The doctor hesitates. "You don't want to know…. trust me"

"Doctor…. tell me."

The doctor breathes deeply and turns around. "Two years"

"What?"

"You've been in a coma for two years Cool Kid. We don't know what caused it, or who did it to you, but you were badly injured. We've been taking care of you here for the past 24 months."

Cool Kid couldn't respond. How did this happen? He was so close. He was going to find who took Cool Cat, his family, and Derek Savage. He was going to save them all. What happened?

"We were also told, that once…. or rather if, you woke up, to give you your things. Let's see here…A black leather jacket, black boots, black socks, black underwear, your pistols, a juice box, and a cool white undershirt. Oh, and the man I mentioned earlier requested something new for you."

The doctor pulls out a metal arm from a basket next to him. It was solver and shiny, and had the initials "KC" engraved into it. His eyes widen, but he keeps his cool. For, he is Cool Kid.

"I believe this is for you. We will have this surgically attached to your stump of an arm. And once we do that we had one more order to tell you from the man himself. What did he say again? Oh yeah, in his own words: "Get up off of your lazy ass and get the fuck over here!""

A few hours passed, and Cool Kid now has a new metal arm. It feels just like his old one, but much more badass. He didn't get his car back for some reason, so he hoped on board the nearest bus and headed towards the police station. That man that the doctor was referring to had to be Tyrone, who else could it be? Nobody else in his life was black.

Cool Kid arrived at the police station after an hour-long ride. He barged in like he normally would, everyone staring at him as he walked in. He opened the door to Tyrone's office and marched in. "Guess who's back bitches!"

Tyrone looked up at him. "Oh. Hello Cool Kid"

Cool Kid's smile quickly faded. "What? That's it? I just waked up from a fucking coma and that's all you gotta say? Come on man, you gotta be more excited than that!"

Tyrone slams the book he was reading shut and looks up at him. "I'm glad that you're back Cool Kid… but it's far too late for anything now! Have you any idea how much the world has changed?"

Cool Kid looks confused. "Well, I was in a coma, so…."

Tyrone gets up in anger and yells at him. "You know those fucks you were chasing!? Those ones who stole Cool Cat!? Do you know what happened to them!? AAAHHHHHHH!"

He sits down and starts to cry. Cool Kid stands there in an awkward silence.

"I'm sorry Cool Kid…. it's just…it's over…."

"What do you mean?"

"Those assholes who took Cool Cat, they've gone completely dark. We've lost them, and we have no idea how to find them…"

Cool Kid just stares at him.

"But…. how did that…. how could that…"

"You were the only thing stopping them. They were afraid of you. When you died…they just left. We lost all trace of them, and these new guys running everything…. they ceased the investigation! They told us it was a waste of taxpayer money! I can't believe this donkey radish!"

Cool Kid looks at him, confused. "New guys? Did the higher ups finally quit after all those death threats I sent?"

Tyrone shook his head. "No Cool Kid, it's more than just the higher ups, it's the whole fucking government!"

"WHAT!?" shouts Cool Kid with his teeth.

"You heard me! The whole government! The whole fucking thing! Not just the local government, or the state government, or the federal government, or the toilet government, but the fucking world government! It's been taking over by some crazy fucks that nobody knows! And they control everything in the fucking world!"

Cool Kid still doesn't know what to say. He's been taking a back by what Tyrone just unloaded on him. He just sits down silently.

"Cool Kid…don't. You can't sit there…."

"What? But I've always sat here in your office."

"Not anymore"

Tyrone stands up with tears in his eyes. "Cool Kid, I'm relieving you of your duties"

Cool Kid feels a sharp pain down his spine. "Wha-! Wait! I-I can still find them! I had that flash drive! All I have to do is follow it! I can stop them! Please just don't fire m-"

Tyrone slaps him.

"Be quiet! Look…when you were in the hospital, you were unstable for the first month. You were on death status. Until you were pumped full of water, sugar, corn syrup, flavorings, and malic or citric acid…do you know what that is?"

Cool Kid, with tears in his eyes, shakes his head.

"It's the Suck Cool Kid! I thought you didn't need it anymore! But your body would barely function without it! It's clear you're still addicted!"

Cool Kid hangs his head in shame. "Alright, I admit it…I wasn't able to quit. I'm sorry. Is that why you're firing me then huh? I…. I guess I'll just leave then…" He heads towards the door and grabs the handle.

"No" says Tyrone. "That's the legal reason why I'm firing you."

Cool Kid looks at him and raises his eyebrow so high that it looks like his eyebrow got a boner. "What."

"You see…" Tyrone gets up, and folds his arms behind his back, walks to the window, and dramatically looks out it. "While you were… gone, FaDoug decided to take up your investigation. We offered him a new partner, but he refused. He only wanted you. He went out, beat up some bad guys, and got beat up some times himself, but we never thought much of it. We just let him have his fun, like giving a child some candy then throwing it down the sewer. We just wanted to see him happy."

Tyrone clears his throat.

"But then…. He found something. Something big. I'm not sure what it is, he won't tell us, he'll only tell you. And that brings me back to why I'm firing you. You see, the law has barred us from investigating into this matter any longer, we have to just sit back and watch. However, if someone outside of the force were to continue the investigation…"

Cool Kid's eyes widen. "But…wouldn't they recognize me? I'd be like a sore thumb out there."

"Ah, but you see, everyone thinks you're dead. But just like a cat, you have plenty of lives left. They'd have no idea you'd be after them. Plus, you do look a bit different, I even had trouble recognizing you! At least you have the same voice actor though."

Cool Kid thinks, and begins to understand it all. "I understand. I'll do anything to kill those fucks. Where can I find FaDoug?"

Tyrone nods and looks at his watch. "Well, it is 2:10 on February 10th, so he should be standing over his brother's grave for the next 8 hours at Butt Lick Land."

Cool Kid snaps his fingers. "The cemetery on Grove's street! Got it!" He rushes out, and runs over to the cemetery to catch up with FaDoug, and finally learn what the hell's going on.