Disclaimer - Don't own south park or any of the characters, just bored and wanted to write something fun.

Authors note – so I haven't written anything in a long time BUT since I have mono and am no quarantined in my home for 3 weeks figure I don't have anything better to do so lets go!

Chapter 2

The next morning...

The sun was just beginning to come up as Stan kicked the trashcan on the curb. He was pissed that the whole night had been wasted on a wild goose chase. Bags were visible under his eyes as he adjusted his glasses, he'd worn them since shortly after he turned 10 when he found out he was quite nearsighted. "Such a waste..." he sighed before walking off into an alley. In the end the job his dad had called him for had been a bust. He wondered if Kyle had had a better night than him. He looked at his phone and saw that it was only 6:50 too early to text his friend on a Saturday morning. "Guess there's still some time to get some shut eye." He trotted off towards his house excited to be able to sleep in his bed for once. He didn't notice the eager stare following him from a different alley.

Elsewhere Kyle was actually up already or still depending on who you asked. He and Clyde had hung out all night after their date. Kyle wasn't sure how he felt about Clyde but he had to admit he hadn't had fun like that in a long time, not since Stan became so scarce. Clyde had taken him to Shakey's and then to see some comedy movie he hadn't even heard of before. He'd been the perfect gentleman the only thing that had really bothered Kyle was that Clyde seemed to be treating him like a girl but he wasn't gonna complain about a free meal and movie. They'd gone back to Kyle's house and played video games and just talked all night. "Dude, Clyde thank you for last night. I really had a good time." Kyle said as he opened his front door to let the other boy out.

"Good enough for a repeat sometime?" Clyde asked hopefully. Kyle thought about it for a moment before nodding.

"Yea I'd really like that, though maybe I should pay next time? I'm not too sure how I feel being pampered all the time." He laughed scratching the back of his neck. Looking over Clyde's shoulder he noticed Stan running past. "Hey Stan-" Kyle was cut off as Clyde planted a kiss on his cheek. Stan turned his head just in that moment to see the exchange and seemed to lose all coordination while running slamming into a parked car. Clyde spun around and strut straight passed the collapsed teen at the end of the driveway.

"You should really watch that Stan." Clyde smirked as he practically skipped down the sidewalk to his house. Stan was filled with a mix of confusion and rage at Clyde. Were he and Kyle going out? Since when was Kyle into dudes? Why hadn't he told Stan.

"Stan...?" The redhead was staring down at him with concern on his face. Stan just stared back.

"So you and Clyde...?" Kyle blushed bright red which might have hurt Stan more than running into the car. Kyle shook his head quickly.

"Clyde just asked me out on a date last night and since you had canceled..." He let his voice trail off figuring he didn't really need to complete the thought.

"So its my fault is what your saying?" Stan said jumping to his feet, he was tired angry and felt like he was being accused now. "I didn't cancel my dad needed my help." He brushed himself off and turned to face Kyle who also had bags under his eyes and now looked pissed.

"Whatever the reasons for not hanging out with me my night was almost ruined and Clyde swooped in and saved it. Honestly you should be thanking him because if he hadn't I'd be a lot more pissed at you." The redhead huffed spinning on his heel and walking back into his house slamming the door. Stan just stared at the closed door wondering what in the hell was happening. He turned finally and began the rest of the walk back to his house. When he finally reached it he slipped off his shoes set his glasses on his side table unzipped his jacket and let it fall to the floor. He reached up and ran a hand through his messy hair. Last night was an unmitigated disaster.

"Why do I feel so uneasy?" He asked himself rolling over to stare at his bare ceiling. "Why is this Clyde thing really bothering me so much?" The more he thought about it the more his head hurt so he decided to just get some sleep, he had a date with Wendy later anyway, last thing he wanted to do was piss her off too.

Downstairs...

"Randy, don't you think you're asking too much from Stan with all this work?" Sharon asked sipping on her morning coffee while her husband rubbed tired eyes and cracked open a beer.

"You know why I do it hun, I wouldn't ask him if there was another way." Randy held the cold beer to his forehead for a moment trying to fight off the coming headache. "If there was another way I would pursue it to the end of the earth but we both know there isn't." Sharon just looked down at her coffee a look of sorrow on her face.

"This is an important time for him, he'll never get it back Randy." Her husband couldn't hide his own depression at their sons predicament.

"I know Sharon, but you know our motto." He said catching her eyes before they both spoke in unison.

"The world has a way of correcting itself."

Later that day...

"...Stan...STAN?!" Stan sat up jerked out of his thoughts by his girlfriend practically pressing her forehead against his and yelling his name. He sat back and composed himself quickly trying not to dwell on what was bothering him.

"Sorry sweetie, zone out there, you know how I am haha." He scratched the back of his neck trying to laugh it off and hoping she wouldn't ask about it. This was a futile attempt though because she always knew when something bothered him.

"Did you fight with Kyle?" She frowned at him as he tried not to make eye contact. "Trouble in paradise?" Stan knew he was going to be found out sooner or later so he would just humor her this time.

"I kinda had to bail on Kyle last night because of my dad...and Clyde apparently asked him out on a date, I saw them kissing this morning..." He mumbled the last part which just so happened to bother him the most for some reason. Wendy's eyes lit up and she covered her mouth with her hands but he could tell she was smiling. His girlfriend was what the Japanese call a fujoshi. She might seem innocent and pure but she was always fantasizing about the boys at Park High getting together. She had even admitted she liked to fantasize about her boyfriend and his best friend as a guilty pleasure, though only because she knew he'd never actually do anything with anyone but her.

"I'm sorry!" She clasped and bowed her head in front of him. "I knew Kyle didn't really seem interested in girls but I didn't know he had a thing for guys, Clyde least of all..." She was starting to get that look on her face letting Stan know she was off in La-La land watching Kyle and Clyde do unspeakable things.

"Can you please not fantasize about my best friend and his b-his friend while we're on a date." Stan glared at her not really surprised by how she was acting. She bowed her head again.

"Sorry love." She moved to the other side of their booth at Shakeys and leaned against him resting her head on his shoulder which definitely lifted his spirits a bit. "You'll still be number one in Kyle's book you know that sweetheart, he isn't going to replace you with Clyde." She always seemed to know what to say to him, reminded him just why he loved her.

Back with Kyle...

"Stupid Stan, just expects me to wait around all night just because he had something he just had to do. How dumb is that?" Kyle fumed ruffling his own hair.

"It isn't very fair to you." Clyde remarked from where he sat at Kyle's kitchen table munching on a bag of chips. "What is he doing every night that he can't hang out with you...I'd never do something like that." He turned away from Kyle to presumably to hide his blush.

"I don't know what he does when his dad asks for him help, he won't tell me..." Kyle sighed and sat down at the table next to Clyde and sank down putting his forehead against the cool wood.

"Want to find out?" Kyle looked up to see Clyde with a mischievous smirk on his face. Kyle felt uneasy about several things at that moment but finding out what Stan was doing was not one of them.

Clyde and Kyle had spent the rest of the day watching out the windows waiting for night to fall and when it did they crept down the street and positioned themselves behind some bushes across from Stan's house.

"I'm not sure if this is a good idea Clyde." Kyle said pulling on the other boys sleeve. He didn't like that he was spying on his best friend no matter how curious he might be.

"Nonsense this is a great idea, I came up with it after all, just relax." Clyde brushed him off kind of ticking Kyle off that he'd just been talked to like he was a girl. He was about to say something when Stan's front door opened and someone walked out wearing a dark sweatshirt jacket with the hood up and carrying something a few feet long in his left hand. Judging by their size it was definitely Stan, a few moments later Mr. Randy came out behind him with something slung across his back. "And the show begins." Clyde had another smirk on his face, it was beginning to make Kyle feel uncomfortable, Clyde was giving Kyle the feeling he knew what Stan had been up to.

"Clyde whats going on? Do you know what they're doing?" Kyle asked him nervously. Clyde looked at him and blinked he seemed confused for a moment.

"Of course not come on now lets follow them." He grabbed Kyle's wrist roughly, hurting him and pulled him quietly down the line of bushes mirroring Stan and his father on the other side of the street.

On Stan's side of the Street...

"This is your standard job son, our intel says 3 but there are signs of a 4th we won't know for sure until we spook them." Randy spoke quietly to his son at his side. He shifted his grip on the strap going across is chest making sure he could reach the grip of the shotgun on his back easily. His son adjusted his own grip on the katana he was carrying. For his part Randy had never had much desire for up close and personal combat, now he didn't mind a brawl but what Stan did wasn't brawling. Randy preferred to take down their prey from a distance with as much firepower as was needed. Stan however seemed to like taking apart their targets almost viciously.

"Any idea how it happened?" Stan asked him breaking him out of his thoughts. Randy just shook his head.

"No idea, more and more seem to be popping up every week." He thought on it, they use to only hunt once or twice a month but lately it had been several times a week. Something was happening. He stopped when his son stiffened. Looking up the first of their prey was stood staring at them from the middle of the street. An old man with a dumb expression on his face he looked impossibly frail. Stan instantly fell into his killing stance and charged. Randy couldn't help feel proud at the hunter he'd raised and decided this one was all Stan's.

Kyle and Clyde's hiding space...

They watched as the two chatted briefly but were unable to hear them from a distance. Clyde pointed to what Stan was carrying. "Is that a samurai sword...?" Looking closer Kyle saw that it was the sword Stan hung above his bed. What the hell was he doing carrying it around town like that someone was going to call the cops on him. "Oh looks like somethings about to happen." Clyde said he had a big grin on his face again but Kyle couldn't tell what he was talking about except that Stan and Randy had suddenly stopped. Twenty yards ahead of them was a frail looking old man staring directly at Stan. What happened next was so fast Kyle couldn't breath.

Stan's attack...

Stan rushed forward unsheathing his sword as he moved. The old man stumbled back and swatted at him in what appeared a feeble defense. "Stay back!" the old man yelled at him louder than he seemed capable. Stan ducked the swat and then slashing his sword straight up above his head as he stood up straight the old man's arm went flying back behind Stan towards Randy who was no lighting a cigarette. Stan stood staring into his prey's fearful eyes for just a moment, sword held straight up above his head before he let his strike crash down viciously.

"Stan! NO!"