"So, you mean that we can either decide now or wait and give Will the possibility to decide later?" Jane asked the doctor who was silently sitting in his chair, glancing at Maura who was reading the files. His eyes travelled to Jane and lingered on her for a moment.
His fingertips were put together in front of his chest and he slowly nodded. "See, in some cases it becomes pretty soon clear what would be the most reasonable decision. Like in Will`s case. There are more male hormones. The female parts aren't developing as well as her male parts. Of course, the decision is up to you. But you have the rare chance to take the decision now which would make things a lot easier for Will."
Now it was Janes turn to glance towards Maura. She felt helpless, sort off. All that she wanted was for the best to happen to Will. Maura took her hand reassuringly. "We don't have to decide it today." The blonde said, needing some time herself to think it through.
The doctor bent a bit forward and agreed. "Take your time. Call me if you come to a decision." They shook hands and left the office. Jane felt her heart pumping fast as they walked out of the hospital into the late autumn sun.
"I think we should do it." She suddenly said as they slipped into her SUV. "Don't you?" she glanced at Maura while she fastened her seatbelt.
The blonde cocked her head and Jane could literally see the wheels turning in the blonde's head. "It would be the most reasonable thing, yes. I think so too."
"Do you think that we are bad parents if we take the decision for her… I mean him?" the brunette finally asked the question which had been bothering since they had learned all the facts. Her biggest fear was to do something wrong. To take away a chance from her child.
Maura sighed and laid her hand onto Janes knee. "What if he learns about this and comes to us one day and says that he would have wanted to decide by himself." Jane continued hitting the steering wheel with her palm out of frustration.
"What if Will comes to us one day and asks why we haven't taken the decision, if we wait?" Maura simply answered with another question.
Jane took a deep breath. "I know. I know. I'm just panicking. I don't know why."
"The mother of all fears when it comes to parenting." Maura smiled softly. "I panicked too at the doctors office. But I think we both know that this is the best decision. Me coming from the scientific side and you with your gut. Its fine. We let him be a boy."
Jane softly smiled at Maura, her smile a bit crooked. "The mother of all fears of parenting?"
Maura nudged her slightly. "Yeah, but sometimes we have to take decisions. And given our history we are not bad parents." She said more seriously, and Jane agreed after mulling over the words.
They drove in silence to the precinct to start their workday. Jane had been into her new positions only for a few days and she couldn't afford to be absent right from the start. There was a lot to learn and the missing routine made it extra exhausting. Cavanaugh had left his number and offered to give her advice, but to her it was a question of honor to manage it all by herself.
Its not that she wouldn't let people help her – she had changed a lot in that attitude – but she had realized after her first hour at his desk, that if she didn't get shit together by herself she would be talking to Cavanaugh constantly. In her mind he was the joker and her last retreat.
When she was done, she went to pick up the girls at Nina's and Frankie's. It was one of the rare days, where Maura had to stay longer than her. She had been called to a crime scene shortly before shutting down her computer for the day.
Therefore, Jane was responsible for cooking dinner. The girls were in full teenager mood and retrieved themselves into their room after dropping their bags and stuff to the floor. Jane rolled her eyes as she picked up the coats and hung them to the wardrobe.
After taking care of Will's needs, she started to cook Mac and Cheese. This was still one of the favorite meals of the girls. And it was becoming one for Will, who was sitting on the carpet in the living room, playing with her cars under Janes watchful eyes.
She threw the spaghetti into the boiling water, trying to ignore the loud voices from the girls. She rolled her eyes when she heard a loud thud. Sophie was standing in the middle of the room, gleaming angrily at Julia who was sitting on the bed. They were yelling at each other, but Jane couldn't make out what the fuss was all about. There lay a pile of books on the floor between them and she assumed that Sophie had thrown them to the floor which had caused the thud.
"What's the matter?" Jane asked in a normal tone. Then repeated the question a bit louder until the girls stopped and looked towards her.
"Last night I told Julia that I found Josh cute and today she clang to him, leaving me outside!" Sophie spat. "She stole him from me!"
"I didn't steal him. I have hung around with Josh before!" Julia responded red-faced. "Besides, you won't have a chance with him, because he is gay."
"So, how do you know? You just say it, that you can have him to yourself!"
"I don't want him to myself because I'm gay too!" Julia yelled out. Jane gasped slightly. This information was new to her.
"Yeah? So why didn't you tell me before?!" Sophie was furious, glaring at the other girl.
"Hey, stop it! Would you? This is getting way out of hand." Jane stood between them holding her palms to both sides.
"Stop it!" Jane said firmly as Sophie was about to say something. The blonde closed her mouth quickly, looking mad as hell.
"Good." Jane sighed taking down her hands. "Now, you girls take a deep breath. Maybe you can discuss this later once you're calmed down."
They heard the front door open and shut and Maura's "I'm home!" flooded the house. Sophie slumped onto her side of the bed and grumbled. Jane shot them one last warning glare and left the room.
She poured Maura a glass of wine and was about to finish cooking when the yelling started all over again. "What's going on?" Maura asked curiously with a raised eyebrow.
"Teenagers… hormones…They are fighting over a boy." Jane told her. "But apparently Julia is gay, so…"
The blonde almost choked on her wine. "She came out to you?"
"Ah well, it was more like: I'm not even interested in Josh because I'm gay." Jane chuckled. "Definitely not the coming out she has planned."
Maura smiled and rubbed her feet while sitting in one of the stools of the counter. "Should we interrupt them?" she asked.
"No, I tried before you came home. I think they need to find some things out themselves."
Maura nodded, watching how the brunette finished up and set the table. Then they called the girls to the table. Both walked into the room shortly after. Their heads shining red.
Jane noticed how they poked around in their plates. The girls almost never fought, so it was a rare sight.
"Can I have my own room?" Julia asked towards the end of the meal. "Sure." Maura replied. We can change the guest room into your own room. Julia nodded and shoveled the last bite into her mouth.
"They'll make up." Maura said, while cleaning the dishes.
"Yeah. They will." Jane nodded and handed the blonde another plate to dry.
And they did, but Julia still moved into the guestroom by the end of the week, as soon as it was prepared as such. It appeared as they both needed more space.