Chapter 6 – The Death of Anakin Skywalker
DISCLAIMER: We (unfortunately) do not own Star Wars. :P
Author's Note: I'd be shocked if this chapter doesn't break your heart...
The Sith spirit pushes back, retaliating, trying to dredge up something else. Vader struggles against her, but soon, they find themselves on the edge of a lava bank. Ahsoka hears Obi-Wan's sharp intake of breath, and he blanches, turning away. A strangled sound escapes Vader, but he seems riveted to the spot as Ahsoka watches with mounting shock the duel transpiring on a platform floating in the lava.
Memory-Obi-Wan leaps, landing on the bank. "It's over, Anakin. I have the high ground!" his voice is pleading, weariness and despair evident in his eyes, which are more gray than blue.
"You underestimate my power!" snarls Anakin, eyes glowing a brilliant yellow. The only emotion she feels from him is rage.
"Don't try it," Obi-Wan warns as Anakin leaps towards him. He swings his lightsaber slicing through Anakin's legs and left arm. Ahsoka holds in a gasp as she feels it. It's not overpowering, but she can still feel the pain on her own body. Anakin falls to the ground, next to edge of the embankment and struggles to pull himself away from the lava. She can feel a wave of incomprehension and confusion. No. This isn't right. I'm not – he wasn't –
Obi-Wan extinguishes his lightsaber, stepping back, raw agony coloring his words. "You were the Chosen One! It was said you would destroy the Sith, not join them. Bring balance to the Force, not leave it in darkness." He stops, reaching down to pick up Anakin's lightsaber. Ahsoka knows the numbness Anakin feels will soon be followed by a wave of emotions. He did. He – how could he? I trusted him! Rage doesn't come immediately. What she feels, is betrayal and pain. It's so potent, it's nearly physical.
Instead of helping, vision-Obi-Wan turns, preparing to walk away. How can you leave me as though I mean nothing to you, as though I'm something to be cast away? But, of course, you do! You never cared about me! You're too much of a Jedi. I loved you. I loved you so much, and you don't even care!
The thoughts are so vehement, Ahsoka can hear them as though they were spoken aloud. "I hate you!" screams Anakin, glaring furiously with burning yellow eyes at his former master's back. Had she been there, she would have believed it, but in the memory, there is exceedingly little anger. Whatever is there is buried under waves of crushing pain and betrayal which are slowly leeching the light from Anakin's heart.
The hate-filled words stop Obi-Wan in his tracks, and Ahsoka's heart breaks for the pain she can see on his face, but with Anakin being trapped in his own agony, she's certain he never noticed. "You were my brother, Anakin! I loved you!" Obi-Wan yells at him, staring down at Anakin's body. He seems conflicted, though she can't feel his emotions. She pushes back her own horror and pain at the memory. She has no doubt that this is something which has tormented Vader for years. Sparing him a quick glance, she sees that he's trembling.
Looking back at memory-Anakin, she watches with mounting dismay as his robes catch on fire from the lava river below. The flames lick their way up his body, as he screams in agony, unable to move enough to put it out. Memory-Obi-Wan stands there before turning and walking away. Ahsoka shudders at the physical pain which she can feel engulfing her body. How did Anakin even survive that? Whatever emotional pain he's experiencing is dwarfed by the physical agony.
The scene fades slightly, shifting to another. Ahsoka blinks at the surgical table in the center of the room, an all-too-familiar figure lying on the center. After the fire, Anakin looks much like he does now. Ahsoka watches in stunned horror as the medical droids perform the surgery. They don't even give Anakin any anesthesia, leaving him fully conscious throughout the operation. She can feel the physical echoes of when they cut into his bones to attach the prosthetics.
The entire time, Sidious watches impassively from the side, not showing even the slightest hint of concern as Anakin screams and writhes on the table. How could Sidious possibly be sadistic enough to tell the droids to do this? She brushes away her tears – when did she start crying anyways? Next to her, Obi-Wan watches, expression pinched. He looks sick. This – this isn't even surgery. It's torture. There's absolutely no reason that Anakin needed to endure this.
She had wondered what had made her master into Vader, and now that she has the answer, she regrets wanting to know. They shouldn't be here witnessing this. Memories like this are incredibly private, but she finds that she's grateful she did get the chance to understand him better. If she wants him to stay alive – and she really, truly does – she'll have to do everything in her power to ensure that he doesn't give up.
It's with a sort of numbness that she watches the droids begin installing the life-support suit, connecting it to his body. She doesn't need to be an expert to know that they did an extremely poor job. It was obviously intentional. Even back then, the technology was far better and could have been designed to give Anakin far more comfort than it did. He wasn't even being treated like a person – slave would be the correct term.
A myriad of emotions flood through her as the helmet is lowered, clicking into place around Anakin's head. The sound of mechanical breathing resounds throughout the room. No longer does he seem as helpless as he had before though, Ahsoka can clearly feel his anxiety and pain. He looks exactly as she's always thought of Vader as looking. Slowly, the table is raised, restrains keeping him fastened to it.
"Lord Vader, can you hear me?" questions Sidious, stepping towards him, the self-satisfied expression on his face concealed under the hood shrouding his features.
Slowly, the helmet turns towards the Emperor. "Yes, Master," Anakin replies, voice so different from his own. His concern and desperation flare as he continues speaking. "Where is Padme? Is she safe? Is she alright?"
"It seems, that in your anger, you killed her," Sidious replies, lips curving up into a smile. Ahsoka wants to punch it off his face. How could he lie like that? How can he be so heartless?
"I? I couldn't have. She was alive! I felt it!" cries Anakin, ripping himself free from the table as horror, denial, pain, and rage flood the area around him. The nearby medical droids are crushed by an unseen force as Anakin takes a few steps forward. I can't feel her anymore. She's gone. Padme. My angel. "No!" he screams, sounding far more like Anakin than Vader in that moment. Ahsoka blinks past the tears which flood her gaze, heart breaking for her master. This is all so very wrong. He's suffered needlessly for long enough.
The scene fades as Vader whirls around, throwing Sidious backwards into the wall using the Force. Ahsoka doesn't know what happens next, but she doubts it was anything pleasant. The Dark Side presses forward again, and she can feel it worming into Vader's mind, forcing another memory to coalesce before them.
Anakin – Vader, technically – stalks across the ground, snow crunching beneath his boots. He pauses, looking down before bending over and picking up an object. A lightsaber. It takes Ahsoka a moment to recognize both it and the planet. Oh. This was where the Republic cruiser she was on crashed during Order 66. He brushes off snow, staring down at the handle, face invisible beneath the helmet, though his grief echoes through the Force.
He ignites the lightsaber, the blue blade hissing to life in front of him. After a moment, he glances up, watching a bird circling overhead. Is she dead? The thought is intermingled with pain, which soon turns to bitterness. You were my – his sister. His apprentice. What does it matter anyways? Anakin died on the banks of Mustafar. If you live, it will be without him, but you left him, uncaring as to his fate. Vader extinguishes the lightsaber, clenching the hilt in his hand as he turns and walks away.
The memory fades and this time, the Sith spirit seems content with the agony Anakin is experiencing, since she doesn't force him to relive any others. For an indefinite amount of time, they remain hovering in a gray zone with nothing around them. Obi-Wan is shaking next to her, avoiding her gaze and seemingly uncaring of the tears on his face.
Anakin is still kneeling on the ground, back facing them. He doesn't resemble a menacing Sith Lord in the least. He looks more like someone who's been badly hurt and can't deal with it. She hates when he looks so vulnerable. "Anakin," she tries gently, cautiously stepping towards him.
He tenses, back going rigid. "Leave me alone," he snarls, not even glancing at them. "Both of you. You cannot help. You'll only make things worse." He's clearly trying to sound furious – and he does – but there's a hint of bitterness and pain there too. He's hurting, and that knowledge only serves to make her want to help him more.
"I'm sorry, Anakin," whispers Obi-Wan, eyes seeming more gray than blue from the years he'd suffered quietly. Ahsoka can see it all now as she looks at him and wonders how she couldn't have noticed earlier. He did a good job in hiding it. If he senses Anakin's increased anger, he doesn't back down. "I wasn't a good master to you. I failed you in many ways, and I'm deeply sorry. It would have been better if Qui-Gon had trained you."
"Shut up!" screams Anakin, suddenly seeming to be about two seconds from slamming his head into the nearest surface hard enough to cause serious damage. Ahsoka flinches back, looking at him as she might a wounded, terrified animal. She's never heard that level of desperation in his voice before. Even Obi-Wan is shocked into silence, expression haunted as he looks at him.
Around them, Ahsoka can feel something changing, though she can't quite name what it is. Slowly, Anakin stands up, turning towards them, eyes glowing yellow in stark contrast to the obvious pain on his face. "You do not understand what you have done to me," he hisses, fists clenching. "Nothing you can say will change it. Nothing." He extends his hands, and the world around them changes.