Chapter Twenty-Seven: Thorin Oakenass
Leaving Beorn's house was a more mournful experience than Emelia expected. She woke up, forgetting for the briefest of moments that they were leaving, and smiled at nothing in particular. She felt her smile dissipate almost instantly when she saw Fili standing over her, a knowing look on his face. There was something odd about his expression, but Emelia wasn't exactly sure what it was. He bent down next to her, placing his elbows on his knees. He seemed to understand her confused look, but said nothing about it. She also found that to be odd. Fili always had something to say, especially if it involved bothering her in some way.
"We are leaving soon. It's time to get moving." He smiled at her but the gesture did not reach his light blue eyes. Emelia sat up further, narrowing her eyes in suspicion at the peculiar look on her friend's normally very happy face.
"What's wrong?"
Fili's forced smile fell ever so slightly when he saw the suspicious look on her face. "Nothing."
"It isn't nothing." Emelia stood up, fording Fili to follow after her into a standing position. The other dwarves were too busy packing up their own minimal belongings to notice the two of them talking. Emelia looked around for Kili and his mop of messy dark hair, only to find herself disappointed when she didn't find him. She knew Fili was watching her look around Beorn's house so she turned back to face him, forcing her attention back on his odd self. "Seriously, Fee. You look like somebody spat all over your favorite slice of pie."
"I do not like pie, Emelia."
Emelia bent down to where she had been sleeping. She picked up the tattered remains of her traveling clothes, looking them over with disdain and disappointment. She did not relish the thought of having to travel in Ori's oversized clothes, but she didn't see how she had any other options. If she wore her old clothes she was more liable to embarrass herself even further with an unfortunate wardrobe malfunction than not. That being said, she made a mental note to not leave without acquiring a belt of some sort to keep her pants up. She didn't think Ori would ever even attempt to look at her again if she accidentally flashed him, or anyone else for that matter, again.
"Everybody likes pie."
"I do not." Emelia knew something was genuinely wrong with Fili when he didn't even try and make some snide comment or joke about his lack of fondness for pie.
"Will you eventually tell me what is bothering you?" Emelia lifted her old shirt up to her chest, eyes taking in the large brown blood stain. It was truly a shame that something so pretty was covered in something as gruesome as blood.
"Probably not." Fili pinched the bridge of his nose, a look of utter stress flashing across his face for the briefest of moments.
Emelia was just about to respond, a plethora of slightly offended responses bouncing around in her mind, when Kili came marching back followed by a very sour looking Thorin. Emelia was tempted to tell Thorin that if he kept his face in the same expression for long enough it would stick that way. She didn't think he would appreciate that, so she kept her comments to herself. Kili was wearing the same look as Fili. Emelia looked between Fili and Kili, cogs whirling in her brain.
"Does it have something to do with that?" She pointed over to Kili and Thorin, lowering her voice even more so as not to be overheard. Fili did not respond. Emelia let out a sigh of annoyance, turning away from him to collect the rest of her stuff. "Is there a reason you were here then?" Emelia wasn't sure why Fili was hovering next to her, given that he wasn't willing to share what was bothering him with her. She felt very petty, all of a sudden, for thinking that and immediately backtracked. "I mean, don't you have stuff to do before we leave?"
"I have something for you." Fili pulled something out from behind his back, ignoring the skepticism on her face. "I didn't really think you would need it, considering, but now that we're leaving I thought you should probably have it back." Fili handed Emelia the small sword Nim had given to her before she left Rivendell. In truth, Emelia had completely forgotten about it with all the excitement that had happened. She instantly felt bad about forgetting about it. Nim had been so sweet to give it to her and Emelia had gone and forgotten about it. She reached out her hands to grab the handle, smiling brightly at Fili for having the foresight to remember her weapon when they were escaping from the Goblin King.
"You remembered it."
"Yes, well I wasn't overly fond of the elf that gave it to you…"
"You didn't even know her."
"But, I know you liked her and would want to have the sword back."
Fili watched her with a tight look on his face, almost as if he was waiting for her to injure herself, as she looked over the sword in her hands. When he seemed satisfied that she wasn't going to put herself in any immediate danger he reached his hand into his cloak. "This one is from me and Kili." He pulled out a small knife that had intricate carvings on the handle. He hesitated for a moment, yet another odd look crossing his face, before he finally handed it to her. "I don't want what happened last night to ever happen to you again. Just promise me you'll keep this on your person at all times."
The concern in his voice made Emelia's stomach squirm with affection for the blonde dwarf. "Of course. I mean, I don't think it would have helped. But thank you, Fee. Really, thank you."
Fili nodded his head, placing his hand on her shoulder briefly before he stepped back from her. "Emelia, I am truly sorry for what happened last night."
With that Fili walked away from her, leaving her standing in the middle of her pile of hay holding onto two equally sharp knives, a look of utter confusion on her face. There was so much regret in his voice as if what had happened was his fault in some way. She made to follow him before she stopped herself. He didn't look like he wanted to talk to her and she wasn't in the mood to push his buttons when he had just given her two very precious, very important gifts out of nowhere. It went against every fiber of her being to let him walk away, but she turned back around and continued to gather her stuff, her own feeling of regret settling over her.
She glanced down at her legs, mentally cursing her damn bladder for what felt like the hundredth time as she prepared to leave Beorn's for what she assumed would be the last time.
Emelia had incorrectly assumed she would be sharing a horse with either Fili or Kili. When she had first seen the horses and more importantly the number of horses her mind had first jumped to the thought that she would share a horse with one of the two dwarves she was closest with. Neither of them seemed to share her sentiments. In fact, neither of them seemed very willing to look at her, let alone wanting to share a horse with her for however long they were going to be traveling that day She made to moved towards Kili despite that, slightly ashamed of herself at how much she was looking forward to sharing a horse with him, when she felt a small tug at her side.
Bilbo Baggins seemed uncomfortable when he looked up at her, hands folded in front of his tattered waistcoat. "Miss Emelia."
"Bilbo, hi."
The hobbit glanced around him, appearing to think over what he was going to say to her. Emelia, feeling just as awkward as Bilbo looked, reached up her hand to play with the choppy ends of her hair, glancing around at all of the dwarves as they picked out their respective horses.
"Emelia, you will be riding with Bilbo today." Thorin addressed with about as much disdain as he could muster. Emelia was used to him being angry all of the time, but for the first time she didn't think she really had anything to do with it. He nodded once to Bilbo before he continued to his own horse, not bothering to say anything further to Emelia as he went past them.
"What crawled up his ass and died?" Emelia said to more to herself than to Bilbo, but he appeared scandalized all the same.
"Erm, well, right." Bilbo looked around awkwardly once again. "Shall we find our horse?"
"Of course." Bilbo smiled ever so slightly at the rhyme, which made Emelia smile right back at him.
Bilbo gestured to one of the beautifully spotted horses when more silence fell between them. He had picked out one of the smaller ones, which was perfect for two of the smaller people. Or people and hobbit, but Emelia wasn't one for being overly specific. Bilbo had already loaded his own possessions onto the horse as well as packs of supplies from Beorn. Emelia pulled the woven pack Beorn had given her off her shoulder, moving over to help Bilbo secure it to the well behaved horse.
"Do you think he has a name?" Emelia moved to stand in front of the horse, rubbing her hands over its soft nose. It nuzzled her hand, breathing deeply against the palm. There was something about its eyes that made her feel peaceful. "Probably. We wouldn't be able to understand it though, considering neither of us speaks horse. It's probably made up of all high-pitched neighing."
Bilbo stopped his movements to listen to Emelia. He leaned out in order to see her better. She was making faces at the horse, smiling to herself when the horse would respond. She leaned closer to the horse, placing a soft kiss on his nose. The horse stepped closer, seeming to understand Emelia and the odd things she was talking about better than Bilbo and the dwarves did even after being around her for months and months. Bilbo wasn't the only one who noticed Emelia and the horse. Kili was watching her too, although his expression was vastly different than Bilbo's. Bilbo watched Kili watching Emelia, putting two and two together with the conversation he had overheard Thorin and his nephews having the night before.
"Bilbo, what do you think?" Emelia shook Bilbo out of his thoughts, forcing him to return his attention to whatever odd thing she was rambling on about.
"We like to name our horses after plants in the Shire."
"So what would you suggest for this fellow?" She moved to stand next to Bilbo, running her hand over the coat of the horse.
"Oak, perhaps?"
"Oak." Emelia tested out the name, leaning over to say the name to the horses face. "Too much like Thorin."
Bilbo glanced over at said dwarf, nodding his head ever so slightly at Emelia's assertion. "How about Toadstool?" Bilbo had never heard of any animal being named 'Toadstool' but for some reason he didn't think Emelia would care about that. She seemed happy with her name as she leaned in to whisper it to the horse, smiling to herself when the horse nodded its head up and down almost as if it was agreeing with her. Emelia placed a soft kiss on the nose of the horse before she turned her attention back onto Bilbo. "Are we leaving soon?"
"As soon as Thorin gives the signal and Gandalf returns from speaking with Beorn privately."
"I'm going to miss sleeping indoors." Emelia admitted, moving to stand closer to Bilbo to avoid being overheard.
"I will as well, but sleeping under the stars has its own advantages."
Bilbo glanced over to Beorn's house, face falling ever so slightly when he saw Gandalf walking towards them. Beorn, who Emelia had found she rather liked judging from the few encounters they had, nodded at the dwarves before disappearing back into his house. Emelia realized, seeing him walking away from all of them, that she should have thanked him for his hospitality when she had had the chance at breakfast that morning. She had been too distracted by both Fili and Kili refusing to speak to her, resulting in her sitting moodily between Oin and Gloin, pointedly ignoring everything around her with vigor.
Emelia shook her head, refusing to let the mood swinging brothers bother her. Well, bother her more than they normally did. She imagined they were probably just being weird about her hair. They were weird about everything else so she didn't consider it to be entirely out of character for them. It sill offended her though, as much as she wished it didn't.
"Do you need help getting up?" Bilbo asked, looking up at the horse with apprehension. She didn't need help getting on a horse, but she wasn't sure the same could be said for the hobbit. The horse was almost three times his size.
"I'm fine."
She was just about to suggest Bilbo get on first when Bofur came walking over to them, usual smile on his happy face. "Up you go, Bilbo." He bent down to allow Bilbo to use one of his hands as a step to get onto the horse. Now that Emelia was thinking about it, it probably wasn't best to put Emelia with the shortest member of their group. "Your turn, Lassie."
Emelia allowed Bofur to help her up on the horse behind Bilbo despite the fact that she knew she would be able to do it herself. She settled in behind Bilbo, smiling at Bofur before he walked away to his own horse. After a moment of awkwardly debating about where she was supposed to put her hands, Emelia finally decided Bilbo wouldn't be overly offended by her wrapping her arms around his waist. Bilbo shifted in his spot before he finally accepted how close they were sitting to each other. He coughed uncomfortably before he spurred the horse to follow after the line of horses carrying the rest of their company. To avoid making the situation even more uncomfortable, Emelia turned her gaze onto Beorn's house, mourning the loss of her pile of hay more than she ever thought she would.
Riding with Bilbo was not as awkward as Emelia thought it was going to be. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Emelia had made the rather unfortunate mistake of assuming that Bilbo was very similar to the dwarves. She didn't know what a hobbit was and had subsequently and incorrectly assumed they were like dwarves. They were close in size but that was about where the similarities ended. Bilbo was without a doubt the most delightfully entertaining person she had ever had the pleasure of encountering.
It had taken them approximately half an hour to realize they had more in common than Emelia would have ever thought possible.
"Of course, my mother would not allow me to leave my room for a week after I did that to her good drapes."
Emelia laughed out loud once again, feeling her cheeks beginning to hurt from how much she had been smiling with Bilbo. At one point during their journey, Gandalf had ridden over to join them, smiling at the sight of Bilbo and Emelia laughing out loud despite the serious mood that had once again settled over all of them.
"Who knew you were such a trouble maker, Bilbo Baggins." Emelia said, watching Gandalf out of the corner of her eye.
Emelia had not had much to do with Gandalf during their travels. She found him to be rather odd, if she was being perfectly honest. He wore a scarf, for one thing. Wearing scarves was not inherently weird; it was quite the contrary. Emelia often thought people that could wear a scarf for more than keeping warm and pull it off were on a level all their own. Emelia wasn't sure why Gandalf was wearing a scarf, however. He didn't seem like the type for fashion and the scarf was far too flimsy for warmth. Excluding the scarf, there were about a million things about Gandalf that unnerved Emelia. He seemed to stare through Emelia, like he knew everything she was thinking.
Emelia glanced over at Gandalf, taking note of the fact that he was, once again, watching her.
She stared at the back of Bilbo's neck in the hopes that Gandalf would move his attention on to bigger and more important things.
He didn't.
Bilbo, seeming to sense both the discomfort coming from Emelia and the scrutiny coming from Gandalf, turned the conversation away from the stories from his years in the Shire and towards their journey instead.
"How far are we from Mirkwood?"
"We will be there by early afternoon." Gandalf answered, surprising Emelia. She had no idea how big the place she was in was, but she was truly surprised that they would only have to travel for less than a day. It had taken them weeks to get to Rivendell and the goblins under the mountain after that.
"And after that?" Emelia almost didn't want to know the answer.
"We will take the Elf Road." Gandalf said, eyes taking in her confused look with interest. "It is the main road through the Woodland Realm. If our luck holds out, we will be able to follow the road until we reach the port that leads us to Lake Town."
Emelia had never heard of any of the places Gandalf was talking about, but she didn't think it was important. "Will the elves be as nice as the ones in Rivendell?" Emelia asked, thinking of Nim and her kind nature.
"They are prouder than their valley dwelling kin, but not altogether unkind in nature."
In other words, no.
Emelia didn't know if she was excited about Mirkwood. It didn't exactly sound like the ideal vacation spot and the track record that the dwarves currently had was less than stellar. For all she knew they could be walking into something like the goblins, or the orcs, or the stone giants, or the trolls, or pretty much everything that crossed their paths. Emelia was exhausted of everything being so terrifyingly bad. It was more mental than physical, but she still felt like at any moment something bad was going to happen. It did not seem like too much to ask for at least one little part of their journey to be mundane and uneventful.
"I am sorry I have not been able to address your problem, Emelia."
It was hard for Emelia to hear Gandalf over the sounds of the horses they were riding and the numerous conversations between the dwarves. She wrapped her hand around Bilbo's arm in order to lean closer to Gandalf so she could hear him better.
"I'm sorry?"
"I had hoped Thorin would heed my words and leave you in Rivendell with me. There were individuals there who I thought might be able to offer more insight into your situation beyond my own limited knowledge concerning you."
Emelia almost fell off her horse. She would have if it hadn't been for Bilbo reaching over to stop her from toppling over. She couldn't exactly say she was surprised by the news that Thorin would completely ignore Gandalf's advice to leave her in Rivendell for her own good. She could say she was livid. Livid seemed like the proper word to describe how she felt about Thorin currently. The thought that he would be so singularly focused on himself and what he wanted for his quest to Erebor to ignore the fact that she needed help beyond just the dwarves babysitting her made her insides curl up in anger. She had the sudden urge to hit something, preferably Thorin's face.
"Could they have sent me home?" Emelia had to try and keep the anger she was currently feeling out of her voice. After all, it wasn't Gandalf she was currently imagining being eaten alive by a pack of rabid prairie dogs.
"I do not know Emelia. It is hard to say, considering I myself know very little about your situation. If I had to guess, and I am rarely entirely wrong, I would say the Valor has something to do with why you are here."
"And you're not on speed-dial with this Valor or whatever?"
Gandalf shook his head, despite not understand what speed-dial was. "I did not bring you here, and therefore I have no idea how I would be able to send you back."
"But these people in Rivendell could have helped? Possibly?"
"Possibly, yes." Gandalf said simply, turning to look at the path ahead of them to make sure they were still heading in the right direction.
"And Thorin Oakenass decided that that wasn't as important as, well, as important as his own problems." Emelia was certain if she wasn't on a moving horse she would kicking the life out of Thorin.
"Emelia." Bilbo placed one of his small hands on her arm that was wrapped around him.
"I think we should discuss this further, perhaps when we are in private." Gandalf suggested, indicating to Emelia that the conversation regarding Thorin was over. She imagined it was for the best. The more she talked about him, the more she thought she would truly want to hurt him. She already felt her animosity towards him boiling up to dangerous levels. She imagined, with her current feelings, the next time he even so much as looked at her she wouldn't be able to stop herself from punching him straight in the face.
Emelia was right when she didn't think Mirkwood sounded like an ideal vacation space. The trees dropped and twisted around each other like arms. The leaves looked discolored and brittle, like the nutrients that they should have been getting were being sucked away. It felt that the temperature had dropped ten degrees since they had left Beorn's home. The archway that she assumed indicated the Elf Road look dilapidated and crumbling. Emelia imagined something beautiful when Gandalf had mentioned the Elf Road, not the dingy, depressing, destroyed shadow of an entrance she was currently eyeing with disdain. If it was her choice they would turn right back around and never look back.
Apparently, nothing was her choice. Thorin Oakenshield had seen to that.
"Release the ponies." Gandalf announced much to the chagrin and displeasure of everyone.
"The forest looks like it's covered in scabies." Emelia muttered to herself as she lifted herself off Toadstool. She was not looking forward to walking once again any more than she was looking forward to spending any solid amount of time in Mirkwood.
Bilbo mumbled something in agreement that Emelia didn't think she was meant to fully hear. He seemed to think the same thing about Mirkwood, considering how he was eyeing the tree line like it had personally offended him. Emelia pulled her supplies off of Toadstool, waiting for Bilbo to do the same, before she removed the reins and bit from the horse's mouth. She moved to kiss him once again on his soft nose, feeling a bit more sad than she probably should have about him leaving.
All of the dwarves were not happy about releasing their ponies but knew better than to fight with Gandalf about it. Emelia was surprised, considering they seemed to like to fight about everything else. Gandalf moved into the edge of the forest on his own, leaving the dwarves, Emelia, and Bilbo to sort out their stuff. Emelia pulled her bag over her shoulder, settling it next to her hip in a way that she knew wouldn't bother her too much.
She watched all of the dwarves, making special efforts to avoid looking at Thorin. Her anger towards him was still bubbling dangerously. She was sure she hated him. More than sure.
She hated everything about him.
"Fili gave you the knife?" Emelia looked around, surprised to see Kili standing awkwardly next to her. She hadn't noticed him move towards her, leaving her a bit surprised to see him standing there. Bilbo glanced back and forth between them, an odd look on his little face, before he slipped away, leaving them in even more awkward silence.
She nodded, moving to step closer to him, only to have him step back from her. Emelia's stomach squirmed when she saw him step back from her.
"Emmy…"
Emelia wasn't sure why Fili and Kili had been acting so weird for the majority of the day, but she knew she didn't like the way it made her feel. Mirkwood was already gloomy looking enough without the two of them making her, and everybody else, feel worse.
"I did the carvings on the handle." Kili said, scratching the back of his head.
"Nice. Really artistic."
"Emmy, I'm sorry."
Emelia rolled her eyes involuntarily. "I don't exactly know what you're apologizing for this time, but I'll accept all the same." She paused, moving to once again step closer to him. She reached out a hand to stop him from stepping back from her again. "Seriously, the carvings are beautiful. I didn't know you did that sort of thing." She reached her hand into where she had stowed the knife, feeling around until she felt the cool handle. She pulled it out, smiling as she looked at the intricate designs.
"Bofur taught me."
"Maybe you could teach me. I mean, if you don't have any other cool dwarf things to do."
Kili seemed caught off guard for a moment before he managed to recover, a bright smile making its way onto his handsome face. "I would love to teach you."
Emelia pulled him into a hug, pointedly ignoring the discomfort that engulfed the two of them. She wrapped her arms around his neck, practically forcing him to return the gesture for a moment before he finally caved. She took it as a personal victory when she felt his arms around her waist. She knew she was going to hold the hug for longer than would be considered appropriate and normal if she didn't step back from him soon. She could feel his chest muscles underneath his clothes, making her feel suddenly hot in a way that she wasn't sure she would consider to be bad.
"Emmy, can I talk to Kili?"
Emelia sighed heavily, not exactly wanting to stop hugging Kili. She couldn't think of a single female who wouldn't feel the same way, though, so she didn't feel so bad. She stepped back from him reluctantly, turning to Fili. Fili was still acting strange, but there was something about the way he was looking at Kili that told her it probably wouldn't be the best idea to flesh out her concerns in that exact moment. She nodded her head at them, smiling at Kili before she walked away, leaving the two of them alone.
"You're completely ignoring what Uncle said." Fili said the moment he was sure Emelia would no longer be able to hear them.
Kili, who had been watching Emelia as she left, turned to face his brother. "I am not."
"What would you call it?" Fili folded his arms over his chest. Fili did not like having to have these sorts of conversations with his little brother. They made him feel like he was 150 rather than 82.
"I wouldn't give it a specific name." Kili said, skirting around the issue.
"I would. I would call it complete and utter disregard for what Thorin told us." Fili said, a bit louder than he meant to. Some of the other dwarves looked over at them, slight confusion on their faces. "After what happened last night…"
"Fee, I'm not going to ignore her. I tried today and it lasted for about seven hours." Kili said simply. "I know Uncle thinks she is a distraction, and she bloody well might be, but I'm not going to…"
"Kee, don't be a fool. Uncle trusted us to accompany him. He trusted us to follow him and do our job to aid him in any way we can."
"And I am following him. I like to think I'm helping." Kili smirked slightly at Fili. He waited for his brother to smile back like he usually did. When he did not, Kili took on a more serious tone. "I don't see what Emelia has to do with that."
Fili shook his head, trying, and failing, to think of the best way to explain what he was trying to hint at to Kili. "She has everything to do with it."
Kili narrowed his eyes at his brother, suspicion filling him up. Fili had been acting a bit off ever since Emelia and Ori had been attacked. Normally, Kili didn't think much of it. He didn't, actually, until their uncle had pulled them aside, anger and disappointment etched all over his stony face.
"Fee, you've been Emelia's biggest supporter from the moment we met her. You were the one who told me that she was worth more than I thought, that I shouldn't just treat her like she wasn't anything special."
"I have never once asked you to treat her like that again. Nor has Thorin." Fili paused, stepping even closer to Kili. "Last night changed things, Kee. You have to see that."
"Emelia and Ori are both fine. Emelia lost a bit of hair, but I don't think that really bothers her. I find I am rather fond of it actu…"
"Kee, we were distracted and because of that both her and Ori were hurt."
"So your solution is to distance yourself so that when she gets hurt, and she inevitably will because I have never met someone so danger prone in all my life, is that we should just be as far away from her as possible?" Kili did not sound impressed with his brothers suggestion. "Brilliant, Fee. Really brilliant."
"Kili, I'm not saying that…"
"No, you're not. Not anymore. Fili, I'm not going to go back to ignoring her, or hating her, or anything else. If you're so worried about being distracted by her, that's your decision, you can stay away from her. I, however, can not."