Chapter 3.

On balance, Sam reflected, things looked pretty good. They even had a prospect of being able to fight Michael and consigning that monster to the Empty was high on Sam's list.

Having Dean back was a big win and he was not a gibbering wreck, but he also wasn't himself and he wasn't in the mood to discuss it. It felt like he had gone back years and after all the progress he had made with Sarah, seeing his guarded expression and haunted eyes was painful.

It was almost worse to see how he was with Cas, to watch human and angel, cautiously exchanging brief, uninformative sentences and to feel the tension in the room. He could also feel how much they both wanted things to be back the way they had been.

With Michael still out there, they all needed to work together and to support each other. With Dean wounded in ways Sam could not perceive or fully comprehend, a return to the mind link could be useful, but Dean seemed uncomfortable just being in the same room as Cas.

Sam and Cas were doing their best, catching him up on all that had happened, but Dean's attention was elsewhere. Sam had seen him zone out like that before and it was never a good thing. Normally, he would have tried to make him focus or to get him to talk a little, but the few things Dean had said since his return had not encouraged Sam to push too hard. Dean had come through the possession with his identity and sanity apparently intact, few others could have survived so well, but there was a brittleness to the remnants of his strength.

Clearly, Cas saw it too. He said nothing about his own struggles of the past few weeks and played down anything that could cause Dean anxiety or guilt. He was watchful, keeping a careful eye on Dean's responses, neutral and muted as they were, but made little attempt to engage him in any real talk.

Sam also knew that Dean was being equally guarded with both of them and for the same reason. Not only was he protecting himself, he was trying to avoid the faultlines in their damaged psyches. He didn't ask about Cas's car and he spoke of inconsequentials to Sam, but he had said he would call Sarah and Sam knew that he would expect her to want to talk about the deep and painful stuff.

The meaningless chatter fell silent when Jules came into the kitchen. "Another meeting of the Insomniacs' Club?" she said.

"I don't need sleep." said Cas.

She smiled at him. "No, I know, Cas." She looked at Dean, "Sounds like Sioux Falls was a success."

"Promising." he said, "There is a weapon that can wound Michael and we know who has it, but she might not want to share."

"We may not give her a choice." said Jules, "Killing Michael is a little bit more important than getting a permission slip."

"I like the way she thinks." said Dean to Cas.

"So do I." said Cas and the glance that passed between him and Jules was filled with meaning.

"Good." she said, "I have a few good ideas to discuss with you."

"You know how I value your ideas and innovations." said Cas, going over to her, "Your imagination astounds me."

"You inspire me." she said.

"Are you two done flirting?" said Dean.

"I hope not." said Cas.

Jules smiled. "Flirting?" she said, "Have you two finished with my angel? Because I need sleep, even if none of you do."

"Sam and Dean do." said Cas, "They are both in serious need of sleep."

"I'm fine." said Dean, "I've spent a lot of time asleep recently."

Sam looked him in the eye, remembering how differently he had explained it in the car. Dean had the grace to look embarrassed.

"But I should probably turn in for the night anyway." Dean continued.

"I think we all should." said Sam.

Cas nodded. "We're heading for bed, then. Dean, don't worry. We know this isn't easy."

"It should be." said Dean, "Should be the easiest thing in the world."

"No. It was never going to be. You need time." said Cas. He turned to Jules and said, "We should ... "

"10-4." she said.

"I'm not sure I know what that means." he said, before she led him away.

"He's right, you know." said Sam, "Nobody is expecting you to just bounce back right away. Well, nobody except you."

"He's the one I always have trouble with." said Dean.

"Yeah, well, he's being kind of a dick. Maybe he doesn't understand that you're human and you're allowed to be. Dean doesn't get it, but Cas and me? We do."

"I'm okay." said Dean.

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not, but I will be. The hard part is over. Michael's gone. I just need to pull myself together." He looked exhausted and Sam knew that he was unlikely to take in anything said to him, however much he needed to hear it.

"Get some rest." he said, "Do you want me to call you for breakfast?"

"I'm out of the habit of eating." said Dean.

"Yes, but you need to. If you'd rather eat alone, I can bring something to your room."

Dean raised a hand. "Sam, stop, okay?"

"I just ... "

"I know, but please, stop. I plan to sleep late. I don't need room service. I don't need to be looked after. I just wanna get back to normal."

"Pretend nothing ever happened?"

"Sounds good."

"You know Sarah's not gonna go for that."

"I know I screwed up. I know this is all my fault and I know you want to help. I know." He ran his hand through his hair. "I'll be fine, Sammy. I always am."

"You can't just ... "

"Yeah, actually, I can." said Dean and he left the room.

Sam washed the coffee cups. He wished he knew whether he should argue with Dean or just back off and let him fight his own way through. For now, Dean felt smothered and that wasn't likely to help. There had been some issue before he had joined Dean and Cas in the kitchen, he knew, but neither seemed to want him to know about it.

There was nothing he could do about any of it until the morning. He decided to go to bed, try to get some sleep and put his faith in Sarah, who had not failed him yet.