Alright folks, just wanted to let y'all know that this chapter has a bit of a TRIGGER WARNING for more dissociation and hinted past torture.

Hisoka would be lying if he said he didn't like the city Heaven's Arena was built in. He absolutely loved it, as a matter of fact. As such, he took frequent walks for the sake of testing his sense of direction and his ability to navigate the maze-like city, which seemed to have been built for that very purpose.

It had been three days since his little discussion with Illumi regarding social class and some details of his past, and... well... Illumi had barely spoken three words to the magician since. It was very odd, because the assassin was usually an inquisitive, curious creature by nature. Hisoka didn't know what to make of this silence. He found a hard time believing Illumi was immature enough to know how to intentionally avoid people, but at the same time, that meant there had to be something else wrong.

Hisoka found himself wondering if it had anything to do with how strangely Illumi had been acting shortly after their discussion.

The magician hummed to himself to pass the time, amber eyes scanning over the white stucco buildings surrounding him. He had somehow wandered into the more run-down side of the city; he could tell from the fact a lot of the buildings had discolored, crumbling walls pockmarked with dark grey areas in which the stony white material they were composed of had chipped away. There were a lot of people out and about during the afternoon, especially because it had been cloudy all day. The hot white sun that had been beating down on the city for the past three or four days had completely vanished behind thick grey clouds, growing darker and darker toward the northern horizon, indicating the presence of a violent thunderstorm.

Hisoka walked past a young woman, small and thin in stature, clad in nothing but patchy rags that contrasted her dark skin. Her eyes lingered on him as he passed, quite obviously glowering with envy. He completely ignored her, too lost in thought to care much for the people around him.

I think it was just some kind of intense dissociation, Hisoka thought to himself, as he reflected on the way Illumi had been sitting with his legs crossed and his head in his hands, silently rocking back and forth as if he were being pushed by an invisible force. The ravenet had been completely unresponsive until Hisoka came over and physically shook him to snap him out of it. He hadn't responded to his name being called, hadn't responded when Hisoka moved closer. That, and his abysmal black eyes had been extremely blank, as if his soul had departed from his body, leaving an empty shell behind.

Hisoka wondered what kind of thoughts caused Illumi to completely detach himself from reality and get lost in his own mind like that. It was crazy to think about. Perhaps it was a result of the hellish torture training he'd been through?

There was something extremely fascinating about the whole situation. Hisoka had a feeling that it really was some kind of mental defense mechanism, something Illumi did subconsciously when reality became too overwhelming, too painful to deal with. Which meant it had to be a result of the grueling torture he'd faced at the hands of his parents.

Hisoka stopped dead in his tracks when he felt something soft press against his leg all of a sudden. He glanced down, and was pleasantly surprised to find a little puppy barely older than three months old nudging the side of his leg and pawing at his shoe impatiently.

"Oh, hello there, little friend." Hisoka stooped down and scooped the tiny creature up to get a closer look at it. It squirmed around and yapped at him, but eventually settled down and took to sniffing his arms curiously, taking in as many of the various scents coating his skin as possible.

It had vivid, icy blue eyes and dark, chocolatey brown fur with caramel-colored splotches here and there. Its ears were floppy, perked up and twitching attentively. A closer examination told Hisoka that the thick-haired puppy was female. She seemed to be in really good shape, which meant she had been abandoned by her previous owner quite recently. Either that, or she had somehow escaped. No matter what the case was, Hisoka had no intention of seeking her old owner out. He now understood how he could start getting through to Illumi.

Meanwhile, back in Heaven's Arena, a certain raven-haired assassin had been all bunched up in the towel closet all morning long. He wasn't sure why he decided to go back in there after getting out of the shower. He just knew that he was enjoying the silence and the sense of security that came with being firmly pressed between two solid, flat surfaces, like the shelf he'd claimed as his sleeping space. The folded towels beneath him did little to protect him from the cold, hard wood, and if he were a normal person, he probably would've been uncomfortable and miserable. Unsurprisingly, he didn't feel a thing.

Illumi also wasn't sure why he'd been avoiding Hisoka. It was completely involuntary, as unbelievable as that may sound. He didn't know how or why it had happened, just that he'd been strangely unable to speak over the past three days.

He had no idea what was wrong with him. It was almost as if his mind kept getting stuck on a loop, going back and forth between wanting to return home because he was loyal to his parents and wanting to stay with Hisoka because... well... Illumi still wasn't sure why he wanted such a thing. He knew that he was pathetic and should know by now what the right course of action was. If his parents saw him so unsure of himself, they would be so very disappointed they probably wouldn't even want to look at him anymore.

But it's my own fault for being caught in such a disgusting state of mind. Perhaps this is why they never were proud of me. It seems I still lack the mental fortitude they all seem to possess. Illumi sighed and drew his knees closer to his chest. I've worked so hard for this my entire life. It's my entire reason for existing, my purpose. Will I ever be strong enough to keep up with it?

He really didn't know what to do. If he didn't go back, he'd be hunted down and forced to return, most likely. But if he did go back... would the seemingly endless cycle of falling short of his parents' expectations continue? Would he ever be good enough, or was he really just a puppet they used for their own personal gain?

Stop thinking that way. Assassins are supposed to be loyal to their families. Which means my parents do care about me. I just need to trust them.

They've given me no reason to trust them, so why should I?

Shut up. Do what you're told.

Illumi winced. His internal dialogue was starting to sound way too much like his father. In fact, now that he was thinking about it in that sense, there had been countless times in which Silva had told Illumi to keep quiet and just do what he was told.

Hisoka was right. Illumi's abysmal black eyes widened ever so slightly. My parents really do have a lot of control over me. Even my innermost thoughts have begun to emulate them. But is it too much control? Or is it just part of being an assassin? After all, they do expect my undying loyalty to them. It would make sense for them to influence me as much as possible.

But when have they ever been loyal to me in return?

The last time Illumi checked, he was certain that loyalty was a two-sided thing. One-sided loyalty was often described as unhealthy. Dangerous. A waste of one's time and potential. Surely his parents wouldn't set him up for failure by tricking him into thinking they actually cared about him and wanted nothing but the best for him... right?

It was a lot to think about, and Illumi was beginning to feel extremely overwhelmed by it. Naturally, he was extremely grateful when he heard the front door open and then slam shut again.

"Lu-chan! I'm back! And I found something I think you might like!" Hisoka's singsong voice carried throughout the living space as clearly and as vividly as a bell that had just been struck.

Illumi quickly unfolded himself from his unideal sleeping position and made his way out of the closet. "What exactly is it that you found? If it's some weird magic trick that involves me in any way, shape or form, I want nothing to do with it!" he called out, as he combed his fingers through his waist-length black hair to make sure it hadn't become disheveled while he was curled up in the closet.

Hisoka laughed, though it sounded less like laughter and more like a fox yipping. "I promise you it's nothing like that. This is a surprise I think you'll enjoy."

Illumi grimaced. "I don't like surprises." he muttered under his breath, checking over his appearance one more time before making his way out to the living area where Hisoka was.

Usually, surprises were a very terrible and unpleasant thing in the Zoldyck family. Surprises often came in the form of an unfamiliar concoction of poison being mixed in with their food for the sake of raising their toxin tolerance, or in the form of their parents congratulating them on becoming immune to some form of torture only to introduce them to a different form that was much more painful than the last. Illumi would be lying if he said he didn't expect something like that from Hisoka.

Naturally, it surprised the raven-haired assassin when he found Hisoka standing in front of the coffee table with a brown and caramel-colored bundle of fur in his arms.

Illumi froze, staring at the furry bundle apprehensively. "What is that?"

"She's-…" Hisoka started to say, but then the fur in his arms twitched and shifted slightly.

"What is that?" Illumi interjected, craning his neck, trying to make out what the mysterious thing could be from a safe distance.

"Calm down, you big baby. It's just a puppy." Hisoka rolled his eyes with his usual cheeky grin, bending down to place the bundle of fur on the floor.

All of a sudden, Illumi found himself staring into a pair of curious, icy blue eyes. The little puppy woofed at him in greeting, and he stiffened.

"Why on earth did you bring that thing here?"

"Because," Hisoka shrugged, watching the heated staring contest happening between the puppy and the assassin with an amused grin. "I figured you could use some company. You're always by yourself and I can tell you've been a little out of it lately. May as well have something soft and cuddly around anyway, it's good for you."

Illumi opened his mouth to form a response, but all of a sudden, the fluffy little creature on the floor managed to get to her feet and took a single step toward him on white paws that were too big for her tiny body. Needless to say, he bolted faster than the eye could see. Next thing Hisoka knew, Illumi was on top of the tall bookcase near the door, glaring down at the puppy with enough venom in those cold, black eyes of his to kill a few dozen men.

"What the hell-… Illumi, are you kidding me? She's completely harmless!" Hisoka laughed almost hysterically, stooping and patting the puppy's head to emphasize his point. She yowled at him as if to ask, why is this other human so scared of me?

"Don't touch it!" Illumi squawked, flapping his hands ridiculously at the magician from his safe perch atop the bookcase. "It'll take your hand off!"

"No she won't, stop being so dramatic. Why are you so afraid of her? Don't tell me you've never seen a cute, friendly doggie before." Hisoka sat down and crisscrossed his long legs, stroking the puppy's soft, unbelievably fluffy fur. She squirmed around a bit at first, playfully nipping at Hisoka's hand, before settling down and making herself comfortable on the hard wooden floor.

"My family's dog is anything but cute and friendly." Illumi hissed.

Realization and understanding dawned on Hisoka a split second later. "Oh, you mean Mike, don't you? That big hound from the pits of hell is absolutely not a dog. I'm not sure what he is, but he certainly isn't anything like the dogs I've seen. For one, he's way bigger and meaner. For two, he was trained by your parents, which makes him evil and terrifying by right." he paused for a second and grinned shamelessly before adding, "Though I'm not sure why a family composed of the most dangerous assassins in the world would need a big, scary creature to keep them safe."

Illumi's burning gaze flitted from the puppy to Hisoka. "What did you just say about my family?"

"You heard me. But, in any case, I'm more surprised that all it took was a harmless little ball of fluff to defeat the terrifying Illumi Zoldyck."

Illumi glared at the magician for a moment, contemplating whether or not it was a wise decision to fling needles at him from the safety of the bookcase. It probably wasn't. Hisoka could easily dodge such an attack and would probably proceed to laugh at Illumi even more.

Pride thoroughly wounded, Illumi plucked a couple needles from hidden locations on his clothes and started slowly, cautiously clambering down the side of the book case. He had three needles clenched between his fingers, glittering dangerously in the morning light filtering in through the numerous full-length windows around him.

"What do I do, exactly? Is there a certain way I have to move in order to keep that thing from attacking me?" He asked, pointing the blunt, rounded end of one needle at the puppy, who was eyeing him with her tongue lolling out of her mouth, completely unconcerned.

"If she attacks you, I'll dye my hair the brightest, most obnoxious green I can find." was Hisoka's even response. "Put those needles away. She's not gonna do anything. Sit down and let her say hello."

"I'm fine, I think I'll stand." Illumi folded his arms, refusing to come any closer.

The look Hisoka gave him was similar to the one mothers gave their misbehaving children. "Illumi, if you don't sit down right now-…"

"Alright, alright." the ravenet rolled his eyes, slowly but surely lowering himself to the floor. Now, both his dignity and his pride were wounded, and he was still absolutely terrified of the little puppy Hisoka had brought home.

"Just let her come to you." Hisoka said, even as the puppy started waddling toward Illumi, shaggy tail swinging back and forth in slow, sweeping motions.

Illumi went absolutely rigid, resisting the urge to scramble backward and fling needles at the creature approaching him. She didn't seem to be exhibiting any hostile behavior. Her floppy, soft-looking ears were up, and her head was lowered, sniffing the floor in front of her, reading all the foreign scents within the wood. She paused for a moment, then looked Illumi dead in the face and started trotting toward him, icy blue eyes sparkling with curiosity and delight at the prospect of making a new friend.

"I don't like this, Hisoka." Illumi said, leaning back slightly, as if that would put a safe amount of distance between him and the baby canine. "Why does it insist on coming so close to me? Is there a reason?"

"She's a puppy, she's curious by nature. And stop calling her an it. She's female." Hisoka replied, shaking his head and clicking his tongue disapprovingly. "Sometimes I wonder how you've managed to last this long. You're an assassin. A cold-blooded, stone-hearted killer. And yet you're somehow terrified to the point of incapacitation over a puppy, of all things."

"I'm not terrified." Illumi gave the magician a hateful stare.

"Bullshit, Illumi. Look at how tense you are."

The assassin visibly cringed when the puppy's tiny snout stopped within millimeters of his leg. She sniffed at his knee, her black button of a nose occasionally grazing his pants. He couldn't help but clench his needles a little tighter, prepared to throw them with lethal force the moment the puppy exhibited any kind of hostile behavior.

A long moment passed before the puppy's pink tongue lolled out of her mouth and she propped her two front paws up on Illumi's leg, craning her tiny neck forward, panting happily.

"What is she doing?" Illumi demanded to know, leaning back even further, resisting the urge to push her off him. "Can you get her off me, please?"

"No. You're fine." Hisoka said, simply. He was looking at his dangerously sharp fingernails with fake modesty, eyeing Illumi out of the corner of his eye with obvious amusement. "Try petting her. She's really soft. But let her sniff your hand first so she grows accustomed to your scent."

"No." was Illumi's blunt response.

Hisoka gave him that same stern look from before. "Seriously, Lu-chan? Just do it. I promise nothing bad's gonna happen to you. But you'll also never get over your fear of puppies unless you try interacting with her. She's not gonna hurt you."

"Fine." Illumi hissed, begrudgingly. He absolutely did not want to appear weak and terrified in front of Hisoka, of all people. That, and the fact Hisoka had put extra emphasis on the words "fear of puppies" had just added insult to injury. "If she bites me, I'm gonna kill her. And you're next."

Hisoka's eyes lit up and he clapped his hands together like an excited kid on Christmas morning. "Ooh, yes, please try it. Please, please try it."

Illumi stared at the redhead incredulously, opening and closing his mouth a few times. He had completely forgotten that Hisoka was somehow both sadistic and masochistic at the same time, which basically meant that threatening him did nothing but excite him. It also meant that Illumi had a hard time deciphering whether or not the magician was excited to inflict pain, or to receive it.

"You're disgusting." Illumi finally said, even as he slowly extended his hand toward the puppy propped up on his leg.

The puppy yapped and chose that exact moment to glance over her shoulder at Hisoka, almost as if she were agreeing with Illumi. After that, she set about sniffing Illumi's hand. He flinched when he felt something warm and wet come into contact with his knuckles, recoiling and hissing under his breath as if he'd been burnt. He glared at the puppy, who had been licking his hand determinedly a moment ago. She just stared back at him with her head cocked to one side, completely unfazed.

"It's safe to pet her, Illumi. You can go ahead." Hisoka said, waving a hand dismissively.

"How do I do that?"

"You don't know how to pet a dog? Are you kidding?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?"

"...No."

Hisoka sighed and scooted forward, scooping the puppy up and plopping her down in Illumi's lap simultaneously. Naturally, Illumi flinched and immediately started trying to push the tiny creature off him, but Hisoka grabbed both of his hands, stopping him.

"Hold on a second. Just... try it, okay? She's not gonna bite you." The magician said, rubbing small circles on the backs of Illumi's hands with his thumbs in an attempt to calm him down. "If she does, you can be mad at me."

"I'm gonna kill both of you if she does." Illumi insisted, slowly raising his gaze to meet Hisoka's.

Hisoka rolled his eyes and smiled knowingly, but still said, "Alright, darling. I suppose that's fine."

Satisfied, Illumi yanked his hands away and returned his attention to the puppy, who was pawing at his leg impatiently and sniffing at his arms. He jumped a little when her cold nose prodded the side of his bicep, but this time, he wasn't so quick to try and push her away. Now that he thought about it, the puppy wasn't exhibiting any sort of hostile behavior. She seemed curious. Inquisitive, almost. But not dangerous.

Tentatively, he reached out and lightly poked the top of her head, recoiling immediately after, as if he'd just poked a live cobra. Being extremely young and hyper, she immediately stood up on her hind legs, chasing after his hand and leaning her front paws against his chest, bringing her tiny, elongated face close to his. Before he had time to react, she'd licked his chin three times.

Hisoka burst out laughing. "I think she likes you, Illu-chan!"

"Um... maybe don't do that?" Illumi said to the puppy, as her tiny mouth dropped open and her pink tongue lolled out of her mouth. "I don't like being licked."

"All you have to do is be gentle with her. Like this." Hisoka reached forward and stroked the length of the puppy's fluffy back with the palm of his hand, fingers curled to match the curve of her narrow body. "Dogs usually love to be pet, especially when they're super friendly like this one. She also seems to like being carried and held in people's laps, based off what I've seen."

"Huh. Mike never liked being pet. The last time I tried to treat him like a dog, he almost took my head off." Illumi tilted his head to one side, tentatively reaching out and running his fingertips over the puppy's head. Her fur was unbelievably soft. He repeated the action twice more before the puppy curled up into a little ball in his lap, resting her head on his leg. "But you're right, he probably did that because he isn't exactly a dog. Much less a friendly one."

Hisoka smiled, noticing how Illumi's voice had softened slightly. "Well, even at that, all dogs are different. There are some who actually are mean, and there are some that don't like being touched. It really just depends on the dog and how well their master treats them."

"Oh? So, you're saying if a dog is mistreated by whoever owns them, they are more likely to resent humans?" Illumi asked, voice adopting a curious tone.

"Yes, exactly. It's the same way with humans too, y'know. If your parents mistreat you, you're more likely to grow up with problems." Hisoka explained, watching as Illumi's deft hands lightly caressed the puppy's head. She seemed to be enjoying all the attention she was getting, seeing as she kept leaning into Illumi's touch and making an attempt to lick his hand whenever it came close to her muzzle. "You seem to be warming up to each other quite nicely."

"I've never had a dog before. Or any pet, really. Mike was more my father's animal than mine." Illumi stated, looking down at the little creature in his lap with a strange sort of reverence. "She's a lot stiller and quieter than I expected her to be."

"Mhm. Usually, puppies are extremely rowdy and noisy, but this one's pretty calm." the magician said, reaching over to ruffle the puppy's ears affectionately. "And she's really cute, too. Isn't she?"

Illumi was silent for a moment before nodding hesitantly. "Yes, I suppose so. Where did you find her?"

"She was out on the streets all by herself. I didn't see her at first because she's so small, but... she came right over to me on her own. I figured she'd be helpful to you, since you're probably getting tired of being on your own all the time."

"Are we keeping her? Can we keep her?" was Illumi's next question, much to Hisoka's surprise.

Hisoka barked a laugh and nodded. "Of course we can. I did bring her back for you, after all."

Although Illumi never really smiled, Hisoka could tell that he came close to it. His usually cold expression seemed to soften just a little bit, and his abysmal black eyes seemed less empty and intimidating. "She is a gift, then? I've never been given a gift before... much less anything like this..." Illumi looked down at the tiny creature in his lap, stroking her soft fur with a sort of tender gentleness Hisoka had never seen from him before. "Can I name her?"

"If you want to." Hisoka shrugged, grinning from ear to ear.

"Is it okay if we call her Saki?"

"An excellent choice. Much better than what I would've come up with."

"Saki it is."

Although Illumi was still tentative and hesitant, he seemed to have warmed up quite a bit to his new dog. There really was something soothing about her presence, in all honesty. Because she was so soft and so warm, it filled him with a strange sense of contentment to be near her. He also found it odd that she seemed to like him so much. The hands he used to pet her were the same ones that ended the lives of countless innocent people. And yet she still loved licking and nipping at his hands as if they were her favorite hands in the world.

As for Hisoka, he honestly couldn't believe his little scheme had worked. He honestly thought he'd have to get rid of the puppy somehow, he didn't expect Illumi to adjust to it so quickly. And the way Illumi started acting once he came to terms with the fact Saki wasn't going to harm him just further proved Hisoka's theory that there was still something of a real personality, a real human being, beneath all the cold, impassive facades Illumi had been forced to put up.

Hisoka spent the rest of the day with Illumi, teaching him how to take care of Saki. As time passed, the sky outside grew dark and heavy with clouds. Hisoka figured it wouldn't be safe to go outside for the next couple days, he'd heard rumors that the storm settling over the town would last a long time and bring a lot of wind and hail. The timing was perfect. He could stay in and make sure Illumi got used to raising a puppy.

Illumi seemed to be doing a lot better than he had when he first arrived at Heaven's Arena. He wasn't much of a smiler, but... it was pretty easy to tell that his spirits had been lifted now that he had something to take care of, something to call his own and protect.

Hisoka understood that the other Zoldyck children had grown to despise their oldest brother because of how absolutely brainwashed and damaged beyond repair he was. It was Hisoka's understanding that the Zoldyck children used to have a very close sibling relationship with each other when they were little, but Illumi's parents had done so much to him that he was probably nothing like who he had been when he was a child. His cold, hardened façade was probably what drove his little brothers and sister away from him. They didn't want a brainwashed puppet, they wanted their Aniki (big brother.)

Naturally, because he'd been shunned by his siblings, Illumi was probably grateful to have something else to look after.

Later that evening, Hisoka found Illumi sitting on the floor outside the towel closet he tended to sleep in, staring at the wall with a distant look in his abysmal black eyes. The magician had been looking for him for a couple minutes now, intending to tell him that dinner was ready. It seemed Illumi had spaced out really hard again, because he looked less human and more like a lifeless porcelain doll.

"Is something the matter, darling?" Hisoka called out. As he expected, he didn't receive a response. He sighed and made his way over to the assassin, crouching down and reaching over to tuck a loose strand of silky black hair behind Illumi's ear. "Illumi. Come on, snap out of it. Illumi..."

The young Zoldyck jumped a little and turned to give Hisoka a startled look. "What is it? Where did you come from?"

"Is something wrong? You did that thing you did the other day just now. It took me a minute to get your attention." Hisoka said, briefly wondering why Illumi didn't immediately go to slap his hand away upon returning to the present.

"Oh. My father called me a little bit ago, and... well, he's angry." Illumi sighed, clasping his hands neatly in his lap and looking down at the floor. "I just told him that I'm not ready to come home yet and hung up. I don't think he'll take that very well."

"You didn't say anything that might've revealed your location, did you?" Hisoka suddenly felt something he had never felt before. It was a twinge of concern. Concern for Illumi's safety.

"No, I didn't." the ravenet gave a slight shake of his head, eyes tracing over the lines between the polished wooden floorboards with what appeared to be vast interest. "He has no idea where I am right now, though it probably won't take him long to figure it out. He's ten times more skilled than I am, especially when it comes to intelligence and observance."

Did he tell you that he's so much better than you or have you actually observed that from personal experience? Hisoka wondered, though he dared not ask such a thing out loud. And why the hell am I concerned for you? Normally, I couldn't care less what happens to you or anyone else on this god-forsaken planet. What's changed?

The magician decided to go the safe route and nodded his head understandingly. "Well, he doesn't know where you are at this moment, so you're safe for the time being. Are you up for some dinner, or are you gonna sit here all night?" he stood up in one smooth, fluid movement and reached down, offering his hand to Illumi.

The assassin stared at it for a moment before making up his mind and taking it, allowing Hisoka to pull him to his feet.

A/N: Trying and failing to think of something to say here but really I think my brain imploded from the HisoIllu fluff in this chapter. They're slowly becoming soft for each other and that, to me, is a beautiful thing. Alright, that's all of the chapters currently available on my ao3! The sixth should come out within the next couple days. I'm looking forward to finishing it, it's gonna be really cute.

(I promise I'll be better about cross-posting in the future. Seeing as this story is my first and only story on my ao3, I am still new to it and basically completely forgot that hey, people on FFN exist, I should give them this content too. Can't let the ao3 kiddos hog all the fun, am I right?)

I would really appreciate it if you left a review before leaving. As always, please take care of yourselves and stay safe. Love y'all!

-UltimatexAdmin