Author's Note: I swear I haven't abandoned this story. Sorry that it takes forever for me to update. If you think this is bad then you should feel sorry for the readers of my other story because I was supposed to work on that story first before updating this chapter but I had some lovely readers poking me to type this one. With school and work my time is cut very thin so I'm sorry if I can't update sooner. But I will do my best. Not to keep you any longer...

Disclaimer: I don't own RA, that should pretty much cover it.

Chapter 17

What Was Really Said

Maverick didn't waste any time. I didn't even have any time to put the long bow away. I tried not to show how happy his mistake made me. That also meant that my skills didn't come off as a threat: at least not yet. It did make me comfortable as he led me inside his large personal tent. Unlike Luther's tent, his wasn't covered in furniture to make it as comfortable as possible. Instead it looked more like an office or for a more appropriate term: war tent. He had a simple bed in the corner but that was as far as comfort goes for Maverick, the majority of the space was for tables with various papers and maps with chairs circling for their secret meetings. Meetings I had yet to figure out how to eavesdrop without being noticed. I guess that was the downside of pretending to join a magic filled circus. Other people were bound to have magic too.

"Have a seat." Maverick said as he sat down pointing to the chair across the table. Hesitating in my steps I made sure to take in every inch of the inside. He couldn't stop me from being curious at this point, it was naturally normal at times like these. I sat down like he told me, not before accidentally kicking the crate beside my chair. Just as I thought, the crate quietly rattled with metal. Meaning that it was very full of weapons. Stocking up are we? I rested my bow against the table making sure that it was within inches I my grasps. Maverick just had a superior air to him. As if he knew he was better than everyone and had to prove it. His black dead eyes and white blonde hair just made an unsettling tingle crawl up my back making the hairs stand up on end. He stared at me as I he was waiting for something to happen. "How long have you had magic?" He asked now showing extreme interest. I had to think about that one.

"I don't know actually." I responded truthfully. "I do know I was ten when I was fully aware of them." Mavericks eyes widened, a glimmer of something twinkled in his dark eyes. Hope perhaps, except I didn't really take him as the hopeful type.

"How old are you now Silas?"

"Twenty." What was he trying to measure?

"That explains why you have hidden it so well." A crooked smile touched his lips making my hand twitch towards my bow.

"What do you mean?"

"Most people only find out that they have special talents when they re ten, or even closer to thirteen. After that, it takes them years to understand what is happening and years after that to hide them completely." How many people did he have to have gathered information like this? He probably took my silent pondering as confusion because he continued. "This means that they usually are prone to accidents so either I find out about them or the town does." Well it's a good thing that I lived hidden in a forest for most of my life.

"I see" I said quietly. Now that I think about it I had quite a bit of control over my talents since the beginning. Or Becks forced me to control it so it wouldn't show. In reality he was just afraid what would've happened if people found out and I didn't blame him. Because I had Araluen's toughest and most strict grandfather, I never had to worry about it. Maverick was watching me intently, which I found a little creepy.

"Now shall we being your training?" The way he said it didn't make it sound like he was asking for my permission. I wasn't expecting him to start so early. I haven't had time to prepare myself nor have I asked Gilan what I should keep hidden from him. I didn't know how Maverick worked, so I don't even know I can keep anything from him.

"Why are you training me? I've been perfectly fine on my own." Might as well stall for time and smuggle as much information as I can.

"I can see that." His patience was running thin. In his eyes I could see that all he wanted to do was learn what advantages I would be giving him. "You see Miss Silas; people like us shouldn't have to hide our talents. No, we should be looked upon and admired for them."

"How are you going to do that?" This was the real question I had been waiting to ask. I saw the corner of his mouth twist as he thought how he was going to make 'take over the kingdom' like it's a good thing.

"My uncle had a plan. He was a great man and even rescued me from the fires. But because of his different views he was cast out of the kingdom, put away from the rest of the world. With your help we can finally show everyone my uncle's world that he was trying to create." Alright, so this is all because of his uncle. Never would've pegged him as the family type, but I guess if his uncle saved his life you would do everything to repay him. If only he gave me a name. I nodded but stayed silent at the end of his story. Pressing him more would make it look too obvious that I was fishing for information. I would have more opportunities if his plan was train me. "I do hope you are willing to cooperate, Miss Silas." I could hear the hidden warning as clear as day. It must be the ranger inside me because I kind of wanted to see what he would try if I didn't cooperate. I forced myself to nod once more.

"Good." A wiry smile appeared on his lips that made the hairs on my arms stand on end. "If you could come and stand here we can begin" he rose out of his chair and backed two steps to the only clear spot in the tent. With a slow gesture he motioned me to come and join him. Begrudgingly, I left my bow resting against the table and stood a few steps away from him. "Don't worry Miss Silas; you are not the first case I've worked on. There are some who are more difficult than others but they come around to trusting me eventually." His smile wasn't genuine, instead it looked like a wolf that just killed its prey and was ready to feast. He was going to find my breaking point. "Since you may be cautious to show your talents, why don't I show you mine first? Trust me and I won't cause you any harm." The snake said to the mouse while bearing its fangs.

I had seen his magic before and it had haunted my nights for a week because I could nothing to save Becks. Maverick raised a hand towards me and I tried my best to keep my breath calm and even but it was like I was just letting the enemy strike me down with a sword as I did nothing to stop him. At first it felt like I couldn't breathe. I clenched my fists and push against this invisible wall that felt like it would crush me. I found my strength from fighting it. Mavericks face twisted as he tried to force whatever he was doing but I felt planted. I even tested moving my fingers, opening and closing them into fists. Then the feeling disappeared. Physically I was fine maybe a little out of breath but nowhere near the pale-faced Maverick. He stared at me incredulously as he worked on catching his breath.

"Are you alright?" Even that was hard for me to ask. But it was the ladylike thing to do because the ranger was rather content that he ended up in worse shape than I was.

"I didn't expect you to be that powerful." There was awe in his voice.

"What do you mean?" I asked for the second time today.

"Normally I have the ability to control a person's actions. In your case I was hoping to bring your magic forward. But just like how Luther doesn't have an effect on you with his silver tongue, it would take everything I had to control you." To me that was great news. As long as it start taking an effect on me like Luther has sometimes. What other explanation could there be to how it gets harder to resist him? The smile I was trying hard to hide disappeared completely when Maverick opened his mouth to say something else. "Interesting, you have control over nature." I followed his gaze and noticed what his eyes had found. All over the ground tree roots looked like they had been pulled up through the ground. My heart was racing because of that evil smile that keeps appearing on his face. That's when I decided that I would do my very best to hide as much as I can from him. The more he knows about the more he will find was of taking advantage of them.

It was a good thing the performers decided to come back to camp soon after that incident. Reluctantly I told Maverick about how I was able to manipulate trees. He had already found out so there was no harm in telling him more about it. Well it was more of answering the hundreds of questions he had. Most of them I didn't even answer and he would jump to the next one. I could see the worn out look on his face and his frustration mixed in. It meant that he was going to try everything to get what he wanted, including trying to find my weakness. What he didn't know was that he already had something on me and I was going to everything to get him back. I walked outside and took a deep breath in. I almost felt like I was suffocating in there. The inside of that tent felt more like a prison or cave than someone's living quarters. I closed my eyes and let the sun beat down on my face. I felt even better because of the bow that was back in my hands. I walked back to the targets Luther had made for me as I admired the smiling faces of the performers who were chatting excitedly about the performance. I reached Astrum who greater me with what looked like a sigh of relief. I smile at him and rubbed his neck and nose affectionately. "Don't worry I'm alright." I said quietly as I regrettably unstrung my bow ad placed it back in my bundle of weapons. If someone saw that I was using the long bow, then I could be in trouble, not that I knew if anyone knew that much about archery.

"Silas!" There would be only one person calling out for me here. I turned around and Luther was still running towards me. He was still wearing his bright blue jacket that he wears for performances. Meaning that I was the first thing he came looking for after, and for some strange reason that thought made me smile. He immediately grabbed both of my hands and held them in his. Worry lines creased his forehead as he looked at my face. "I just heard that Maverick started his training with you." The worry also traveled with his voice.

"Don't worry, I'm fine." I told him. He suddenly wrapped him arms around me. He cradled the base of my skull with one of his warm hands so my head rested on his shoulder, holding me tightly against him with the other arm.

"Please don't lie to me Silas." He whispered. The softness in his velvety voice made it my chest tight. "I can feel you shaking." I looked at my right hand and was surprised that he was right. I was shaking. I didn't even realise it. "Just let me hold you until it stops." I nodded slowly. To help stop the shaking I grabbed onto the only thing that I could. I grabbed fistfuls of Luther's jacket and held on tightly to them. I couldn't even think of what was causing this, there was nothing rational about this. But nothing about this mission is rational. There are so many conflictions fighting inside my head Maverick seemed to have scared them out. That's what this was: fear. This is exactly how I felt when I couldn't take the second shot and nearly got Gilan killed, the feeling of helplessness.

I closed my eyes and let Luther hold me. I stopped trying to fight against it. It was too hard at the moment to do otherwise. I was trying too hard to be too many things at once. A Ranger, a lady and some sort of sorcerer all at once, how can they all fit? I was only human after all.

Luther rested his chin on the top of my head. I focused on him, on his touch. There was no confusion there. It was pure and simple human contact, back to basics. His hand stroked my hair softly helping me to grab strength from his strong arms. My breathing was even when Luther loosened his hold on me. His hands moved to my shoulders so he could look clearly into my eyes. There was still worry on his face but the caring in his eyes made my heart skip a beat. "Be honest with me this time love, are you alright now." He asked seriously. I took a breath in and assessed my condition before answering him.

"Yes." I told him honestly. Luther believed me but was still wary.

"I still have to finish some business with Maverick, would you like me to ask Claudia could make you something to eat?" He asked, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"No thanks. I kind of want to be alone for a bit."

"Are you sure?"

I nodded "I'm just going to take a walk to clear my head."

Luther really didn't want to leave me alone but in the end, I eventually convinced him to go. That was after agreeing to meet back here in twenty minutes. I think it was just his way to making sure he had a way to check if I decided to run away again or not. About two minutes into the forest and I sensed someone watching me. I knew there was only one person who could be that close to my rangers sixth sense could pick up without being able to see them. Then I felt something being placed around my shoulders. I turned and found Gilan who proceed to do up the clasps at the front of my ranger cloak.

"I thought you might want this." He said as he flipped the hood over my head. I doubt he could see the real smile under my hood as I couldn't detect what emotion he was hiding under his. Gilan and I haven't had the chance to talk freely like this since what happened in my tent. Just quick daily updates but that was it.

"I only have twenty minutes before Luther will send the search party out for me."

"What did Maverick want in his tent?"

"He decided it was time to start my training." Gilan visibly stiffened.

"Already?"

"Yes, he tried his traditional method of trying to force it out of me so he could figure out what he could use but it backfired on him." Gilan was at least patient enough to wait for me to continue. "Good news is that he can't use his powers on me without draining himself physically."

"Which means that you can hide some of your abilities from him."

"Well he sort of found out about my tree moving ability."

"Hopefully we can keep some hidden so we have a hidden card up our sleeves." I nodded agreeing with him.

"I was thinking the same thing."

"Beckett is alive." Gilan said after a minute of thinking and analyzing what we should do next.

"What?" For some reason I thought I heard him wrong.

"Sorry, I didn't get to tell you before but we kind of ran out of time last time. But I saw him, alive and still causing trouble as a prisoner." I felt heaviness lifted from my heart. My happiness took over. I jumped the space that separated us and wrapped my arms around him. Gilan held on to my waist so that he could steady us. If he wasn't a Ranger, I probably would've run him over. Becks was alive. That's all I wanted to know, that there was still a chance to save him. I hugged Gilan tightly but then I realized what I had done. I opened my eyes and everything was confirmed. I was hugging Gilan, and he was hugging me back. I suddenly pushed myself out of his arms as jumped and extra meter back. Gilan must've just realized it too because he couldn't look me in the eyes and cleared his throat. The ground near my feet for some reason seemed incredibly interesting at the moment. We both were trying to pretend it didn't just happen. I took a few breathes before turning back to Gilan. It was a good thing we both were hiding in our cowls. It would've been worse if he mentioned something about my face turning bright red. But it did make me curious to see if there was any indication of how he felt written on his face. Stop it Silas, how can you even think about that. Get a hold of yourself, I mean it's not like a small hug like that could've possibly affected him in anyway. "I think I better head back now, or Luther might start looking for me." Gilan cleared his throat stopping me from turning around completely. "The cloak if you please, it would be difficult to explain why you have a cloak that smells like a man." Instinctually I smelled it and he was right. This was Gilan's own extra cloak. Wearing it and smelling him on it made my heart beat faster. Mostly due to the fact that this smell reminded me of what happened a minute ago. Slowly I peeled it off and handed it back to him. He laughed once quietly bundling it back in his arms. No doubt at my expression of disappointment of having to give it back. He nodded and with that I turned back the way I came.

Slowly, as I started to pick my way back through the forest to get back to the camp, the unexpected happen. Sure I had sensed that Gilan was coming closer again. I had turned around when my sixth sense told me he was right behind me. He must've forgotten something because it hasn't even been a minute since I last saw him. Then it happened. Where Gilan had found a large bucket, I had no idea. All I know is that he had just poured the cold water that was inside it on the top of my head.

A small shriek came from my mouth as the icy water had splashed over me and trickled down my spine making me shiver. "What was that for?" I practically yelled at him. Well I would've yelled if I wasn't worried about someone overhearing us because we had come closer to the camp. So really it was more like a whisper. A Ranger smile appeared on his lips but that was all I could see from under his hood.

"I distinctly remember you telling me last night that you needed another way to get Luther out of your head because running into tree wasn't cutting it anymore. Plus I recall you being jealous of never having proper Ranger's initiation. I was a little short on time so this will have to do for now."

I didn't want to grace that smile with a snarky remark. One I didn't have a good one at the moment and two a lady really shouldn't have the vile words I was thinking of coming out of my mouth. Scrunching my nose and making a face at him only made his smile grow even bigger. I turned quickly and threw my hair over my shoulder, secretly hoping that some water would splash him as a result. Worst of all was that smile and because it was making it really hard for me to pretend to be angry at him. Fighting against a real smile was probably harder than hiding a blush.

I started back for the second time but again I was stopped. Gilan had put both his hands on my shoulders and lowered his face from behind me to my ear. "I don't like you getting that close to Luther. Please be careful." He whispered softly in my ear. His hands softly fell from my shoulders; my arms tingled from where his fingers trailed off. Once I had turned around he had vanished. There was a warning in his voice but I could tell there was something else to which he was referring. As always men were a mystery to me. Especially Gilan and Luther, they just made everything so much more complicated that it is impossible even to think around them.

As usual Luther was waiting for me. I course he was waiting in front of my tent so the chances of sneaking in to quickly change out of these wet clothes were impossible: while I was wearing a dress that is. Luther smiled as soon as he saw me waving pleasantly. It stopped once I was close enough for him to really see me.

"What happened? Why are you all wet?" Concern was back in his voice.

I told him the first thing that came to mind. "I fell in a river." I told him bluntly.

His brow furrowed. "How? There aren't any rivers nearby." I should've thought this through more.

"Believe me, when you're as clumsy as I am, you will find one." That must've worked for Luther because he laughed brilliantly. He picked a strand of hair that had stuck to my face and brushed it out of my face.

"I'll bring you a towel to dry off, love." He said with a wide smile. It's official. Gilan and Luther should both be forbidden to smile from this moment on.

I entered my tent and peeled off my dress. I had now just discovered there was something worse than a dress: a wet dress. Even worse was the wet corset. The strings were even more difficult to manage now wet. 'Gilan was so going to get it.' I thought darkly as I had to figure out how to strap myself into a real corset. Luther had already announced that he was back before I had finished lacing it up. Man I hated these things. I had hoped that because I had to wear one every day I would get used to it. I doubt there will ever be a point where I would volunteer to wear one. Finally figuring out how to strap myself in, I pulled my blue dress over my head and tied my wide brown belt over it. Of course I made Luther wait even longer because I had to lace up my boots because my comfy soft soles boots had unfortunately been on my feet when I met Gilan. Don't tell Mrs. Padavick but they weren't too bad anymore, I couldn't exactly sprint or fight in them but they worked at looking pretty.

What probably seemed like hours for Luther, I finally stepped out of my tent. The fact that the sun had started its descent told me that it did take me some time to change. A patiently waiting Luther smiled as soon as he saw me. Apparently, he didn't get my silent message about banning smiling. I avoided his smile and looked at the ground by his feet instead. I watched as they took two steps towards me and they stopped right in front of mine. I couldn't meet his face. I just knew that smile was still there. Not to mention our faces would be too close, I mean what would happen if he tried to kiss me again? I know I haven't been an official Ranger for very long, but I doubt that this was part of any of that kind of training. Where is one supposed to learn this type of stuff? Just then Luther put the towel over my head. My mistake was looking up. I had already warned myself and everything but I was curious to see what he was thinking as he proceeded to dry my hair. The smile only widened when our eyes met. Yes, definitely a mistake. He looked genuinely happy as he was wringing my hair dry. Drying my hair has never been that much of an event before. It just made me even more curious about what he was thinking. He met my eyes and his hands froze. I knew what was going to happen next and I also knew that I had to stop it before he got the idea to even inch closer. I took the towel back and started drying my own hair, shaking every drop of water out that I could.

"You're going to have to stop tempting me love." He said quietly. I look back at him. He scratched the back his head while smiling a crooked smile. I looked at his quizzically. How was I tempting him? As if reading my mind he answered my question. "It's your eyes love. They always seem like they're telling me something else, but they always pull me in." He brushed the hair behind my ear so he could have an excuse for getting a close look into my eyes. I felt my cheeks heat up and I couldn't stop my own smile from spreading to the surface, so much for Gilan's attempts. I felt Luther's smile widened without even looking at it. He wrapped one arm around my shoulders, giving me a squeeze against before steering me away from my tent. "Come on, it's the last day here and you know what that means right?" He asked playfully. Honestly I was trying to figure out how to think straight and moving day was the last thing on my mind. Luther laughed again walking even faster. "It means we're already missing the party."

For once I gave in. It was the only thing that helped clear my head of all thoughts. Who knew having fun would be actually fun. I wasn't the center of attention like I was the first time which made it easier to hide within the crowd. I actually danced; again don't tell Mrs. Padavick that I did it voluntarily. She would make me do it more often and probably force me to go the town festivals. I wonder if they are anything like this. The food and atmosphere were spirit lifting. Some performers put on a show just for the rest of the camp. I clapped loudly as they finished, thoroughly impressed and the evening I could tell was just getting started. Feeling tired after the buffet of food Claudia and some of the girls had prepared I sat down by one of the fires. It was farther from the main group of the dancing. I've learnt that they always regret it the next morning, especially waking up early tomorrow to start the take down.

As usual Luther followed me. He sat down right next to me, so close that our knees were touching. "Can I see you hand for a moment?" That wasn't the question I was expecting him to ask. Before even waiting for a response he grabbed my left hand.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I watched him spread out my fingers as if examining the line on my palm. "I wanted to check something." His hands had their own warmth to them; they even worked better than the fire for warming them up. His fingers slowly found their way to the tips and intertwined themselves between mine.

"See," squeezed my hand tightly. "A perfect fit. I could make you happy all the time like this. And I know that it might take some more time for me to have a space in your heart but I want nothing more than to be by your side forever. So I won't ask you just yet, because I know what you're going through and I know what the answer will be. So until you say yes, will you let me be by your side like this, waiting for you?" There was a hope in his eye as he said this. With his free hand he brushed my hair back until his hand found the base of my skull. My heart was pounding so fast I thought it was going to burst. He had trapped me and I couldn't pull away this time. He smiled gently at me as his eyes looked like they could read mine making it very difficult to breathe. He softly closed his eyes and tilted his chin up. I was able to breathe only for a second right before I felt his lips gently touch my forehead. This was different than any other time he had kissed my hand or cheek. If possible it felt like there was a meaning behind it. All I knew was that I was frozen for however long he lingered there.

Everything that passed after that was a blur. There is a possibility that Luther walked me to my tent but all I know is that I ended up here somehow. My hands were still shaking and nothing I did could stop my heart from beating this fast. I placed a hand on my chest and took several deep breaths. "Silas?" I actually jumped when I heard my name. Gilan was standing there with his hood down when I turned around. He had a Ranger smile on, the one where he knew that his apprentice was lacking. The one I would normally be very worried about. His smile dropped when I didn't react like I should. He took my hands and placed them over my ears. It took a minute but I could finally hear my heart beat slowing down. Once my breathing evened out Gilan let go of my hands. "I was hoping it didn't affect you this much." Gilan said to the floor.

"You heard what he said?" I asked, relieved that I wouldn't have to try to remember. I don't even know if I would be able to at the moment.

"His proposal? Yes I heard it." Gilan said distastefully.

"Wait proposal? What do you mean proposal? You mean he was basically asking me to marry him?" I felt my eyes nearly pop out of my head. I knew for sure that Crowley did not mean for me to get this close. How could I possibly face him ever again? I ran my fingers through my hair nearly ripping some of it out. I was hopeless. "How am I supposed to become a Ranger or even do this mission if I can't control myself or even figure out what one man is saying?" Crowley should've put Gilan in the dress; he wouldn't make mistakes like this. I began pacing the room, trying my best not to let my emotions get any closer to the surface. That could lead to me breaking, or from breaking something.

"Because this mission is harder than any mission I've been on. Dealing with enemies and killing with our skills and weapons is easier than what you're going through." Gilan had to hold my shoulders to get me to look into his face and stop me. "Look, you get no weapons, and you have minimal training in covert operations. You get your mind and your emotions played with, and that is as taxing as any injury."

"Then how am I supposed to go on?"

"Because, you're not going to be fighting by yourself anymore." My thoughts stopped, at least the doubtful ones. "I think now is a good time for your knight in shining armour to come and save you."

Author's Note: Now wasn't that worth the wait. Ok maybe it was a little long but I gave you guys extra bit for both Luther and Gilan. I was typing this on my phone on the bus (if there are more mistakes than usual please let me know, I just wanted to update as quickly as possible), and it was really hard to not make faces. But the next chapters we will finally have Gilan and Luther meet for the first time. What will happen? Possibly a love triangle? Who are we kidding we all knew this was going to happen. So hopefully I can finish my other story (on the last chapter I might add, so if you want to check it out I would love that) quickly so I can start on the next one. Maybe it's too much to ask for a review but I would love to hear what your favorite part was. Mine was definitely when Gilan dumped the water on her. I had that part in my head for so long you don't know how excited I was to finally put it in. REVIEW please!

Love, Marie

Yes I don't have helpers anymore and they are partly the reason I can update faster because I have to do it all on my own now, so I'm just going to take all the credit.

Now to the reviews I forgot to put in

TOASTERLLAMA- Thanks for the review!

Girl- I think I told Catherine to change the genre at one point but that never happen so I think I will go and change it. I didn't plan to have this romance at the beginning when I first started but then I came up with Luther and that was where we changed it to more romance. I decided to put a Gilan POV in chapter 19 so if I remember I will put a flashback to Jenny. Thanks for the idea. Thanks for the review!

Adrianna- I always love your reviews they just make me laugh. I actually had to reread this chapter to remember what you guys were all talking about and it made me smile just remembering and seeing it in my head. Thanks so much for the review!

Elvishrangerwolf- I'm glad you liked that part. It was the first idea I came up with, even before I put it into a Ranger apprentice fanfic. Thanks for the review!

Guest1- I think you meant Gilan but I think we could use a little more jealousy happening. Thanks for the review!

JayStevens- Another Gilan POV is coming up in chapter 19, just wait for it. Thanks for the review!

Tess- Will finding out will be hilarious. For me it I'm trying to make Luther my least favorite character.

Darling- Thanks so much for the review it really means a lot to me.

Dragonflame247- Thanks! I will try to update as soon as possible.

Rehead Nerdette- No worries. Thanks for the review!