Saviour - What if the men Shelby gave her baby to hadn't been the loving parents she thought they would be
Rating - T
Characters - Shelby & Rachel
A/N -I'm not sure about this chapter, I only realised as I read it back that nothing really happens. I think I'm going to skip forward a couple of weeks after the next chapter to Rachel's birthday/Christmas. If there's anything in particular you'd like to see happen feel free to let me know and I'll do my best to include it.
Both Shelby and Rachel were relieved when the doctor discharged Rachel the next morning and after a visit to the pharmacy to get Rachel's painkillers, they were soon back home. Shelby got Rachel settled on the sofa before throwing their bag of dirty clothes into the laundry room to sort later and firing off a quick text to Amy to let her know Rachel was home and she'd call her later that night, neither of them had slept well in the hospital bed and Shelby was certain it wouldn't take long for Rachel to fall asleep. She wasn't wrong, by the time she got back to the living room Rachel was already fast asleep. Shelby smiled and took Edward bear from the plastic bag she'd left by the door, slipping him under Rachel's uninjured arm before she kissed her daughter and covered her with the blanket from the back of the sofa. Shelby yawned as she straightened up, she too was exhausted and all she planned to do was sort the laundry and the dishes before taking a nap herself.
Rachel didn't sleep for long, she woke just half an hour after she fell asleep. She panicked for a moment when she realised Shelby wasn't there, but after taking a minute to wake up a little more she realised she was back at home and she could hear her mother singing softly in the kitchen.
"Mom" Rachel said quietly, getting Shelby's attention as she walked into the room.
Shelby turned from where she was emptying the dishwasher, "hey baby, is everything okay? I thought you'd sleep for a while longer."
Rachel took a deep breath before saying something she would never have dared say to either of her fathers, "my arm hurts".
She knew, if she was lucky, her fathers would have told her to stop complaining, they might even have gone as far as to hit her arm, bend her wrist back, give her something to really cry about but Shelby, she just smiled softly, "I have your painkillers in my bag, the doctor said they might make you sleepy though and you're already tired so how about you go change and get settled somewhere we can both take a nap, your bed, my bed, the sofa, wherever, I'll make us something to eat because you can't take the pills on an empty stomach and then I'll come join you." Rachel nodded but didn't move from the doorway, "is there something else?" She moved across the kitchen to take Rachel's face in her hands and kiss her forehead softly, she couldn't believe how close she'd come to loosing her baby again.
"Could we watch a movie til I fall asleep?" She asked, unable to look her Mom in the eye.
Shelby smiled, every day Rachel crawled a little bit more out of the shell her fathers had forced her into, "of course. Go get in my bed when you're changed, it'll be comfier than the sofa. I'll be up as soon as I've made us something to eat." Rachel nodded and allowed herself to relax slightly in Shelby's embrace. Shelby was happy to hold her daughter for as long as she needed to be held but a little voice in her head reminded her that Rachel was in pain, "go get changed baby" she kissed her forehead again, "we can snuggle up in bed."
"Thank you" Rachel sighed, "I, I love you Mom."
"I love you too baby. I love you so much. I'm so glad you're okay" she smiled and kissed Rachel for a third time, "go get settled in bed. I'll be right up sweetheart."
Rachel clung to her mother for a moment longer before finally pulling away and walking upstairs, stopping only to pick up Edward Bear., she'd been relieved when Amy had bought him to the hospital, he'd already picked up Shelby's scent and had become a great comfort to the nervous teen. Shelby meanwhile made them both sandwiches for lunch, Rachel's appetite was slowly growing but Shelby was careful not to overwhelm her with too much food in one sitting. She grabbed some fruit and other snacks in case either of them got hungry later before taking a large bottle of water from the fridge and Rachel's pills from her bag and heading upstairs.
Rachel cleaned her teeth and wiped at her face with a damp wash cloth, she'd briefly considered taking a shower before remembering she couldn't get her cast wet. She wondered how she was meant to stay clean over the next six weeks, would she have to ask Shelby to help her bathe or would she have to make do with using the wash cloth. She didn't have time to think about it too much as she heard Shelby climbing the stairs, she quickly used the toilet, again struggling to wash her good hand and changed into leggings and one of the many t shirts Shelby had given her, "Hey" Shelby smiled as Rachel walked into the room, "I'm just going to change" she gestured to the pyjamas in her hands, "there are some dvds in here" she said gesturing to a box she'd taken from her closet, "mainly musicals though, if you want to watch anything that's not a musical the rest of my dvds are in the cupboard under the television downstairs, feel free to go and have a rummage, I won't be long."
"Can we watch this?" Rachel asked when Shelby walked out of her ensuite.
"Singing in the rain? Sure." Shelby smiled, "you get comfy I'll put it on" she took the dvd from her daughter and placed it in the dvd player before picking up the remote and making her way over to the bed, making sure Rachel was ready before pressing play and handing Rachel her plate.
"I, I don't want to get crumbs in your bed." Rachel said not wanting Shelby to think she was ungrateful for the food she'd been given.
"Don't drop any crumbs then" Shelby said with a smile hoping Rachel would know she was joking, "I don't mind" she said truthfully, "we can shake them out before you go to sleep or we can leave them and change the bedding later." she took a large bite from her own sandwich to prove her point.
Rachel ate just over half her sandwich before Shelby gave her the painkillers she'd been prescribed and just ten short minutes after swallowing the pills Rachel was fast asleep, still sat up in the bed and still balancing her plate on her lap. Shelby smiled as she felt Rachel lean into her and it was only as she glanced down at the head leaning on her shoulder that she realised Rachel was asleep. She put Rachel's plate on the side with her own before turning off the tv and carefully moving Rachel to a more comfortable position laying under the covers. "Momma" Rachel mumbled, curling into Shelby almost as soon as Shelby laid down.
"I'm here baby" Shelby ran her fingers through Rachel's hair, making a mental note to offer to help Rachel wash it later, the hospital had given her a waterproof cover so Rachel could bathe or take a shower with her cast on, and whilst she would probably be able to wash her own body, Shelby guessed Rachel wouldn't be able to wash her own hair properly but she'd rather struggle to do it herself than ask for help.
"Momma" Rachel sighed, a small smile forming on her face.
Shelby smiled too, "Momma's here baby, Momma's here" she laid playing with Rachel's hair for a while, watching as Rachel slept, a smile on her face and her lips moving slightly as if she was talking to someone. "I wish I knew what you were dreaming about" she told the sleeping girl, "but at least they're happy dreams, we like happy dreams, we don't like nightmares, we don't like them at all."
"Yeah" Rachel sighed again, "I like the dancing mangoes."
Shelby laughed, "I guess dancing mangoes are better than monsters" she mumbled to herself before the events of the past 24 hours caught up with her and she too fell into a peaceful slumber.
She woke to Rachel tossing and turning, her brow creased as she whimpered softly but this was different to the nightmares she'd seen Rachel have. Shelby glanced at the clock, it had been over five hours since Rachel had taken any painkillers, the girl must be in agony. She kissed her softly and left her sleeping for a while, "Rachel" she shook her shoulders softly a few minutes later, "Rachel, wake up baby."
Rachel's eyes twitched open, "Momma" she whimpered, her eyes filling with tears almost instantly, "Momma it hurts."
Shelby smiled sadly, "I know darling, that's why I woke you up" she helped Rachel into a sitting position and pulled the covers straight over her lap, "you need to eat these before you can take your pain pills" she handed Rachel a couple of crackers and was surprised when the girl ate them without protest, "here you go sweetheart" she passed Rachel the two white pills and waited until they were in her mouth before passing over a glass of water, "better?" she asked once Rachel had swallowed the pills.
Rachel sighed, "everything hurts" she finally admitted.
"The doctor said that was to be expected. I fell off a top bunk when I was your age and I ached for days, I can only imagine how sore you are." She sat back against the headboard and allowed Rachel to cuddle into her, "how about I run you a nice warm bath?" Shelby suggested, you can have a good soak, it might help your muscles relax."
"What about my arm?"
"The doctor gave me a waterproof cover for your cast, you have a soak in the bath and then I'll wash your hair for you later."
Rachel's face lit up, "Really? You'd really help me?"
"Of course" she kissed the head that was resting on her shoulder, "you might be able to wash your body one handed in the bath but I think you'd struggle to wash your hair" She sat with Rachel for a moment before kissing her again, "I'll go run your bath" she smiled, "you look exhausted, you can have a bath while I have a shower and sort out the laundry and then I'll wash your hair and you we can have an early dinner and settle down for the night."
Shelby ran Rachel a bath, making sure to add plenty of bubbles, and helped her cover her cast before heading into her ensuite to shower. She stood under the warm water for a moment before the events of the past day caught up with her and she fell to her knees as she sobbed. It was bad enough when she found out how awful Rachel's home life had been, but now she knew that she hadn't even been able to escape when she was at school. She didn't know how Rachel was strong enough to keep going, she was sure she'd have broken years ago had she been put in Rachel's situation, all she wanted was for her baby to be safe and loved, she thought Hiram and Leroy Berry would at least give her that, how wrong she had been. She sat under the shower for almost twenty minutes, her body heaving as she sobbed, she cried until she had no more tears left to cry before pulling herself together, she needed to be strong for Rachel, she needed Rachel to feel like she could turn to her whenever she needed to, Rachel didn't need her mother falling apart. She washed quickly, wrapping her hair in a towel she dried herself off and slipped on some clean pyjamas before picking up her dirty laundry and heading downstairs. "Rachel" she tapped gently on the bathroom door as she walked past, "I'm out of the shower, If you need me I'll be downstairs, I'm going to do some laundry and make us some dinner, do you want anything in particular?"
"No" Rachel replied from behind the door, "I, I don't mind."
Shelby smiled, Rachel sounded exhausted, "I can't really be bothered to cook anything" she admitted, "how about we order takeout when you're out of the bath?"
The bathroom door creaked open and Shelby found herself face to face with her daughter wrapped in the largest, softest towel Shelby owned, "I thought it was a bit silly talking through the door" Rachel explained shyly, "and I haven't got anything clean to change into in here."
Shelby laughed and dumped her dirty laundry on the floor, "come on then" she smiled wrapping her arm around Rachel's shoulder and leading her back to the bedroom. "Is takeout okay?" she asked as she stood looking into her closet to give Rachel some privacy as she changed, "if you'd rather I cooked something then I don't mind."
"I, I don't know if I like takeout, I've never had anything like that before."
Shelby mentally slapped herself, of course Rachel wouldn't have had anything like that, "that's okay sweetheart, we'll order a few things for you to try, if you like them then you can eat them, if not I'll make you something to eat and I'll feast on takeout. We'll have a look at the menu downstairs and see if there's anything you like the sound of."
Rachel sighed, she was sure takeout was horribly expensive and after the last week she didn't want Shelby spending a penny more on her, "I'm not really hungry" the familiar line slipped easily from her lips, "I can just have an apple or something."
Shelby shook her head, "you need more than an apple sweetheart, you need to eat so your body can recover. How about I just order what I usually get and some extra rice dishes or something, you can try what I order and if you like it we can share if you don't I can quickly do you some veggies or something to have with some rice, how does that sound?"
Rachel nodded, rice wasn't that expensive right? "Okay" she reluctantly agreed.
"Here" Shelby expertly picked up some of her chicken chow mein with the chopsticks she held in her right hand, "try this" she held her left hand under the chopsticks as she fed Rachel, "do you like it?"
Rachel nodded, "yeah, it's nice."
"Good" Shelby emptied half of the plastic container onto Rachel's plate, "help yourself to rice and prawn crackers, do you want a fork or would you prefer a spoon?" she asked moving over to the cutlery drawer.
"A fork's fine." Rachel picked at her food, watching as Shelby even ate her rice with chopsticks.
"Do you want a go?" Shelby asked when she noticed Rachel watching her, "there's another pair here" she picked them up, "there's nothing to it when you know how." She passed Rachel the chopsticks, "put them like this" she demonstrated with her own chopsticks, "then hold them like, yeah, that's it, you've got it" she smiled, "try something easy first like a piece of chicken." Rachel tried to pick up the piece of chicken but she couldn't get the chopsticks to do what she wanted and they fell out of her hands and onto her plate. "Almost" Shelby said encouragingly, "but try it like this" she placed the chopsticks back in Rachel's hand but then wrapped her hand around her daughter's, moving her fingers until she had a piece of chicken and some noodles firmly between her chopsticks, "there, now you just need to get it to your mouth" Shelby smiled as she took her hand from Rachel's.
Rachel ate the food her mom had helped her pick up before trying again and this time just picking up noodles, "I did it" she grinned as she held the chopsticks in mid air over her plate.
"You did sweetheart, it's easy when you know how right?"
Rachel nodded, "thanks for showing me how to do it."
Shelby couldn't help but smile, she'd never seen anyone so excited about something so simple , "It's no problem" she said truthfully. The pair ate mostly in silence but Shelby was pleased when she noticed Rachel had eaten a lot more than she usually did, "give me five minutes to clear the table and send Amy a text and then we'll go wash your hair" Shelby smiled once all the food had been eaten. She sent Rachel to watch tv for a couple of minutes whilst she set the dishwasher going and started a new load of laundry, "I'm just going to text Amy then I'm ready" she said, flopping down on the sofa beside Rachel and picking up her phone from the coffee table. 'Sorry I haven't called, slept most of the day, will call 2mro. Showed R how to use chopsticks, acted like I'd given her the world x'.
Amy's reply came almost instantly, 'you're an ace mom :) don't worry about calling me. Love you both xx'
Shelby smiled, "Amy sends her love" she told Rachel before sending a final text to her sister, 'Love you too, talk soon x' "do you want to go wash your hair?" Shelby asked, "or do you want to watch the end of this?"
Rachel shook her head, "I'm not really watching this. I can't ever seem to concentrate on the tv."
Shelby smiled sadly, "come on then" she said, "let's go wash your hair." She sent Rachel upstairs before going back into the kitchen and picking up a small plastic stool, pausing only to grab a couple of towels from the landing on the bathroom, "let's go in the ensuite" Shelby told Rachel, "it'll be easier in there because the shower's over the bath." Rachel nodded and followed Shelby into the ensuite, "Lily likes to bake" Shelby explained when she saw Rachel frowning at the stool she had in her hands, "she stands on here so she can reach the counter but I thought you could sit on it, the doctor said you shouldn't bend too far because of the blood rushing to your head."
Rachel nodded, "okay."
"Sit down then" Shelby smiled, "sit with your back against the bath and then you can just lean your head back." She folded up the smaller of the two towels she'd bought, "here, put this under your neck to make yourself more comfortable". There was silence as Shelby turned on the shower, "is that okay?" she asked once the water had warmed up and she began to wet Rachel's hair, "it's not too hot or cold?"
"No" Rachel shook her head slightly, "it's fine thank you."
"Okay" Shelby smiled, "I'm going to use my shampoo because I forgot to pick yours up". She lathered up the creamy liquid in her hands before beginning to run it through Rachel's hair, "when was the last time you had a haircut?" she asked, noticing her daughter had quite a few split ends.
"I don't know" Rachel said sadly, "I used to cut it myself when it got too long."
Shelby sighed sadly as she began to rinse Rachel's hair, "I'll make you an appointment with my hairdresser if you'd like, you can either just get a trim or you can get a whole new style, it's up to you. When your arm's healed we could go to the spa, make a day of it, maybe get a massage or a facial or something" she suggested as she reached for the conditioner. She didn't notice the tears in Rachel's eyes until she was rinsing away the last of the conditioner, "baby" she whispered, her voice full of concern, "what's the matter?" she squeezed most of the water out of Rachel's hair before taking the large towel and wrapping it around the girl's head and pulling her into a hug, "did I hurt you?" she asked as Rachel began to sob into her chest.
Rachel shook her head as she clung to Shelby, "you love me" she sobbed, "you love me and they didn't. I don't understand."
"Oh sweetheart" Shelby began to rub at Rachel's back, "you're right, I do love you but I can't explain why your fathers did what they did, I've asked myself that question so many times, I wish I knew, but I do know it was nothing you did. Nothing you could ever do would make it 'right' for them to treat you like they did sweetheart. All I can tell you is that you're safe here and I will always love you. You've got your appointment with the therapist tomorrow, I rearranged it while you were sleeping this morning, you can talk about this there too."
"Will you stay with me?" Rachel asked shyly.
"I'll go in with you and stay for a little while but then I'll leave you to talk. I promise you I'll wait right outside but I want you to be able to talk freely without worrying about what I'm thinking, and if you feel like you don't 'click' with the therapist, if you're not comfortable with them then please tell me darling so we can find someone new."
"I'm tired" she whispered.
"I know you are sweetheart" she hugged Rachel tighter for a moment, rubbing her back to calm her down before helping her to her feet. She guided Rachel to a dressing table Rachel hadn't noticed was in her mother's bedroom, "sit down" Shelby gestured to the stool, waiting for Rachel to sit before she began to gently dry her hair with the towel. Once it was mostly dry she picked up a comb from the table and began to carefully brush out Rachel's damp hair until it as knot free when she braided it loosely so it didn't tangle in the night, "come on then sleepyhead" she dropped a kiss to Rachel's forehead, "bed time."
They laid quietly for a while before Shelby asked Rachel to scoot over so she could get up, "where are you going?" Rachel asked quietly as Shelby headed for the door.
"I'm going downstairs to get some crackers and a bottle of water, that way of you need to take a pill in the night you can."
"You're coming back right?"
Shelby walked back over to the bed and placed her hand gently on Rachel's cheek, "baby I'm going to the kitchen and then I'll be right back up, I promise."
"Okay" Rachel nodded.
"Two minutes "Shelby promised as she straightened the sheets around Rachel's tiny body, "I'll be back in two minutes." As promised Shelby came straight back from the kitchen, placing a bottle of water and a packet of crackers on the sideboard. "Oh baby" Shelby noticed the tears rolling down Rachel's cheeks as she climbed into the bed, "you're okay" she wiped the tears away and pulled Rachel to lay on her chest, "you're okay baby, you're okay."
Rachel woke a little after 3am to take another dose of painkillers and she was still fast asleep when Shelby woke to the sound of her phone vibrating just before 10, "Shelby Corcoran" she answered sleepily, not recognising the number, before yawning as she stepped onto the landing so she didn't wake Rachel.
"It's Coach Sylvester" came the reply on the other end, "is now a bad time?"
"No, no" Shelby shook her head to try and wake herself up a bit, "it's fine, what can I do for you."
"I looked at the cctv tapes" Sue got straight to the point, "you can't see Rachel being pushed but she is surrounded by a group of hockey players right before she falls. I'm keeping the original tape under lock and key but I gave a copy to Principal Figgins and, last night I left another copy with the Lima police department. I'm not going to let this be swept under the carpet, could you and Rachel come in this afternoon to meet with Principal Figgins and myself? He might not want to face up to the problems in his school but I'm not going to let him pretend this never happened."
"I'm sure we can" Shelby nodded, "I need to speak to the guidance counsellor anyway, Rachel's going to be off school for a while and I want to make sure she doesn't fall behind in her studies."
"Okay, I'll make sure she's available. I'm going to ask someone from the police station to sit in on the meeting too so Rachel only has to tell her story once."
"Thank you."
"How's she doing?"
Shelby sighed, "it's hard to tell. Her physical injuries will heal in time, she's got an appointment with a therapist this afternoon so hopefully we can make a start on fixing the mental injuries. She's sleeping at the moment, her painkillers knocked her out. Her appointment this afternoon is at three thirty, what time would you like us to come in?"
"How's 1pm?"
"That's fine" One was early enough to give her plenty of time to get to Rachel's therapist appointment but late enough for Rachel to sleep a little longer.
"I'll meet you at the main entrance" Sue told Shelby, I'm going to make a few calls this morning, I have contacts at the local news channel and I think the education board would be interested in this.
Shelby nodded even though she knew Sue couldn't see her and frowned when she heard whimpers coming from her bedroom. "I'm going to have to go" she told the cheer coach, "I think Rachel's waking up."
Sue understood, "Okay, I'll see you both later. 1pm at the front entrance"
"We'll be there." Shelby said before saying her goodbyes and ending the call. She found Rachel tossing and turning in the bed, she sat down on the edge of the bed and brushed a stray piece of hair back from Rachel's face before beginning to sing softly, "Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place, suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace, suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste, it all revolves around you. And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide, sing out this song and I'll be there by your side. Storm clouds may gather, and stars may collide but I will love you, until the end of time. Come what may, come what may. I will love you until my dying day" She ran her hands over Rachel's head, pausing to play with the strands of hair that had worked loose from the braid. Rachel sighed in her sleep and curled into Shelby, nuzzling her face against her mother's thigh.
Rachel woke a little before eleven to find herself laid with her head in her mother's lap as the elder woman sat back against the headboard reading one of the many celebrity magazines Amy had bought for Rachel when she was in hospital, "Mom" she mumbled sleepily.
"Hey" Shelby let the magazine fall to the floor, "how are you feeling?"
"I, wha.. wh... Momma" she finally sighed.
Shelby smiled, Rachel was adorable when she'd just woken, it was as if it took her brain a few minutes longer than her body to wake up, "I'm here darling, take your time."
"What time is it?" Rachel finally asked
"Almost eleven, the doctor was right, those painkillers really do knock you out. Are you hungry?"
"Yeah" Rachel whispered, "a little" she paused for a moment, "how long have you been up?"
"Only about an hour or so"
"You didn't have to lay with me."
"I didn't mind" Shelby said truthfully, "I got up to answer the phone, when I came back you were tossing and turning, I sat beside you and you cuddled into me"
"I'm sorry" Rachel mumbled into the duvet as her stomach rumbled loudly.
"Don't be, if I'd have minded I'd have found a way to get out, now lets go get some breakfast, my mom always said that an army marches on it's stomach and we've got a busy day today" Shelby said as she helped Rachel from the bed, she wasn't going to tell her about the meeting at school, not until they were almost there, she didn't ever want Rachel worrying about anything more than she had to.