Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
Author's note: All Bella/Rosalie bits have this soundtrack in mind: Embers by Helen Jane Long.
The many clocks in the Cullens' house ticked on and on, but Rosalie tuned them out and focused on the only ticking that mattered to her, Bella's heartbeat. Her chest moved gently up and down so surely, so consistently, one could easily forget that one day it would stop. Her heart pumped blood throughout her body, giving life to limb, mind, and soul. All that was needed was a burst artery, a blood clot, a blow to the head, a few minutes without oxygen...an infinite number of ways for her Bella to cease being.
She blanched at the pool of venom in her mouth and instinctively swallowed. She wasn't there for Bella when she needed her because of her unabating need for fresh blood. The time between hunts kept shrinking. How long until her desire for an immortal Bella becomes truly unbearable? Flashes of her unconscious figure beneath the crumbling roof ripped through her thoughts again and again. She had come so close to dying. If Rosalie had opened that door a split second later it might have been too late.
Rosalie was so consumed with terror at all the what-ifs that she didn't notice Bella stirring.
"Hey," Bella whispered groggily.
"Hey," Rosalie smiled. She reached over and took her hand. "How are you feeling?"
"I'd shrug but that'll probably make it worse," Bella answered warily. "It's not so bad. Whatever's in that IV bag is working its magic."
Rosalie nodded, trying not to dwell on how much pain Bella really was in. She wished she could take away all that pain...force her own body to suffer if it meant Bella would be spared even a moment's discomfort. Humanity's a real bitch.
Bella ran her thumb back and forth over Rosalie's hand before pained resignation broke across her face. "I'm sorry for what I put you through," she said quietly.
Rosalie nodded, but soon her own face mirrored the pain on Bella's. "I thought I'd never see you again," she whispered. "I thought we'd find a corpse. You can't imagine how close it was."
Bella sighed. "If I'd known they'd be vampires...Rose, they fooled all of us. I wasn't looking for trouble-"
"You could've told Alice and Jasper!" Rosalie let out a strangled cry. "You could've taken them with you when you went to Charlie's! All of this could've been avoided!"
Rosalie let go of Bella's hand and ran her own through her hair. No matter where she looked, Bella's lifeless eyes stared back at her. She made herself look back at the girl, whose eyes had filled with unshed tears threatening to fall. "I'm sorry too," she continued. "For not being here with you when you woke up. I needed...I needed to clear my head."
And a few acres of forest, she mentally added. Even hours after, Rosalie still felt uncontrollable rage flowing through her. How could she have allowed herself to become so weak? For 80 years her strength never wavered. She'd stool tall and strong, proud despite self-loathing. The last few days, for the first time in her existence she found herself on the verge of losing a piece of herself...a piece of the foundation that kept her standing. Only four times in her life did Rosalie experience that sort of desperate helplessness: when those vile men took away her free will and raped her; when she opened her eyes for the first time after the venom finished turning her human flesh into hard granite and she understood that the life she wanted for herself would never come to pass; when she ran through the woods with Emmett's hemorrhaging body in her arms...part of her knowing that that man belonged to her on a level she had yet to understand, and that his life was slipping away with every step she took; and finally during the two weeks of hell last summer when none of them knew where to find Bella. All her life Rosalie had done everything she could to avoid placing herself in exactly the kind of situation she found herself in.
"I understand," Bella said, then with a slight grin she added, "you probably would've destroyed the house if you'd waited up here."
She ground her teeth together and tried to smile for Bella's sake. It came out hollow, but Bella didn't comment. The girl slowly but surely inched sideways, leaving space beside her, and beckoned for Rosalie to join her in the bed. Rosalie obliged and spread her limbs carefully around Bella so as not to jostle her broken bones. Bella lay her head gingerly in the crook of her arms, and Rosalie watched the tension in her body slowly dissipate as she settled in place.
"I can't lose you," Rosalie whispered.
"I'm not going anywhere," Bella mumbled, clearly on the verge of slumber.
"That's not what I mean, Bella."
But the girl was already asleep.
The small cast saw vibrated loudly as it cut through the tough material on Bella's arm. Soon enough, the cast split into two and Carlisle turned off the machine.
"There you go," he said, smiling. "Let's take a look now."
Under his direction, Bella slowly moved her arm every which way until Carlisle nodded, satisfied.
"Ok," he handed the broken cast back to her. "You're officially healed."
From the door, Alice squealed with joy. "You do know what this means, right?" she bounced from foot to foot, unable to contain her excitement.
Bella looked to Carlisle for help but he held his hands up in mock defeat. "Can't help you there, Bella. You got yourself into this, remember?"
"How could I forget," she grumbled and turned to the diminutive girl who was tapping her heels and glaring at her. "Ok, ok! You win. I'll wear whatever you want me to wear tonight, ok?"
Alice frowned some more for a few seconds before her excitement got the best of her. She brought her hands together and a minute later, dragged Bella from Carlisle's home office and down to her room. "I have the perfect dress!" She gushed. "It'll stop a few hearts, you'll see. Figuratively speaking of course," she added.
"Bella!" Jasper yelled from downstairs and was up next to Alice before Bella could blink. Rosalie, Edward and Emmett soon joined them.
"Oh, thank god!" Bella smiled at Jasper and leaned into Rosalie. "Have you come to rescue me?"
Jasper laughed and ignored his wife's 'hmph,'
"No, darling," he apologized. "We came to give you this."
It was a letter from the College Board.
"Oh," Bella took it and thumbed over the edge. She looked at Alice and asked, "Did you see?"
Alice snorted. "I don't need to see to know you aced it. Go on, open it! It's been so long since my first SAT score..."
With a soft nod from Rosalie, Bella obliged and opened the letter. She planned for a perfect score and judging by the numbers at the top of the page, she got it.
"Way to go Bella Bear!" Emmett put his hand up and she rolled her eyes, but high-fived him anyway.
"Nice work," Rosalie said softly. "You won't have any trouble getting into a good school. Even without our help."
"Mmm," Bella smiled and quickly looked away. She folded the letter and carefully placed it back into its envelope. Things were coming together perfectly, just as she had planned a year ago when she knocked on Charlie's door for the first time. Why, then, was the mere thought of the future leaving her with a bitter taste in her mouth?
"Let's see this magic dress, Alice, hmm?" Bella turned to her friend and let her pull her into the room.
Thud.
"Jasper?" Rosalie's voice was low, whispering so Bella couldn't hear from the other side of the door. She walked down the stairs with Emmett, beckoning for the empath to follow. When they reached the bottom of the stairs, she turned to him and asked, "what was she feeling just then? When she looked at her score?"
Jasper fidgeted. "Rosalie, you know these things are fleeting. Besides I can't read her mind. There's no way to know why-"
"Please, Jasper," Rosalie interrupted him. "What was she feeling?"
Silence. Edward slipped into the room behind Emmett and Rosalie.
"Guilt," Jasper finally said. "...and self disgust."
"I thought so," Rosalie whispered. She looked from him to Emmett. "Why?!"
Her question lingered in the air like a heavy cloud.
Later that night:
Ok, you can do this Bella. You're wearing a dress that's probably worth more than Charlie's yearly salary-don't fuck up and burn it.
Alice wasn't kidding about those stopped hearts. Bella herself almost had a heart attack when she saw it hanging in her closet, but a deal's a deal. Alice was so upset with her right after the James mess for not coming to her for help before running off to Charlie's that Bella had fumbled and then did the only thing she could think off to appease her: promise to come to prom and let Alice pick out her dress. Now that she was actually wearing it and about to surround herself with a bunch of piranhas (i.e., people from school), she thought maybe she could've just dealt with an angry vampire...Alice would have forgiven her eventually.
The girl in question glared at her in exasperation. "Would you please stop making plans to bolt? Everything will be fine."
Bella rolled her eyes and mumbled incoherently. Maybe she could make a run for it from the bathroom. Maybe-
"Hey," Rosalie whispered next to her. "I've been looking forward to dancing with you. Don't you dare run off."
As usual when Rosalie asked anything of her she automatically nodded. "I won't," she promised. "Are you sure they don't think it was me?"
"They don't," Edward answered. "You have my word, they don't think you had anything to do with the fires. The body and Billy's testimony were irrefutable. Even your tormentors have largely surrendered their earlier theories."
Bella sighed and gave Edward a grateful smile. "Thank you," she said.
The much too revealing dress was but one of the many reasons she would rather snuggle with Rosalie alone than come out here. Her previously broken rib made it far too difficult to attend classes up until now. This would be the first time Bella had to deal with people other than the Cullens and Bella found this...taxing to say the least. Why can't they all just go away...
Emmett pulled into an empty patch of dirt that extended the parking lot. Since the school's gymnasium was completely destroyed, this year's prom was moved at the last minute to the only country club near town, a couple of miles away from campus. It was right on the edge of the forest.
A flash of red and blue and Bella nearly hissed in anger. Jasper gave her a look and she instantly calmed down. Charlie was here, patrolling...
Despite her bubbling irritation she kept her eyes on him until he rounded the building away from sight. He didn't look any different from the last time she saw him conscious five weeks ago. That was when he'd stormed into the Cullen's house accusing her of committing arson, of killing Harry Clearwater in La Push. That was when Bella started to doubt herself. Four weeks with broken bones and he never once came to visit. Oh, he asked Carlisle about her condition time and again...but that's not the same thing, is it?
"The police don't want to take any chances in case another arsonist tries something with so many people gathered in one place," Edward said. "That's why he's here. Bella, he is thinking about you. He's sorry for doubting you."
"He can shove his sorry up his ass," she whispered. "I don't want to discuss Charlie. Let's go inside."
In spite of her anxiety, it didn't take long for Bella to start enjoying herself. She wasn't exaggerating when she boasted of her dancing skills to Emmett and Rosalie. It took just one dance with Jasper for her feet to catch up to what her brain knew and she was off, laughing as she danced circles around the huge ballroom with whoever happened to be her partner for that particular number.
"Told you you'd have fun!" Alice smiled excitedly as Bella twirled her around.
Bella rolled her eyes but swallowed her pride this one time. Alice was right and there was no point denying it. She was having fun. Even the glimpses she caught of Charlie staring at her couldn't put a damper on her mood. She hadn't felt this carefree in a long time. She really should go flying more often...
Before she knew it, she had danced with Jasper, Alice, and Emmett numerous time before she was finally thrust into Rosalie's arms.
"Finally," Rosalie whispered. "I thought I'd have to duel them for a dance with you."
Bella smiled and let Rosalie lead her in time to the music.
"I so, so want to kiss you right now," Bella whispered urgently. It was true. To be this close to her and yet so far...it was torture.
Rosalie cocked her head. "You know you can. I won't stop you," she said, and as if to illustrate her point she leaned in so close to Bella their foreheads touched for a brief second before Bella reluctantly pulled away.
"Rose...please..." Bella sighed but even as she distanced the space between them to a more socially acceptable, amicable appearance, she hesitated. The temptation to kiss her, to claim her fully in front of her peers was almost impossible to resist.
"Alright, I won't push you," Rosalie said. She inched closer to Bella until nothing but a few millimeters separated them. "But you should know that I want it. So does Emmett."
And then she kissed her. Rosalie moved so fast no human could have seen. Even Bella didn't really see it, but she did feel her lips tingle they way they always did when they kissed. It was subtle, but then again there was nothing subtle about the way Rosalie looked at her. Even as Bella mirrored her impassioned gaze, she wondered if they had outed themselves to everyone in the ballroom despite Bella's adamant refusal of Rosalie's offer. You'd have to be extraordinarily dense not to draw inferences from the tension in the air between them.
"May I?" Edward's soft voice asked politely when the song ended.
"Of course," Bella replied. She gave Rosalie's hand a squeeze as if to reassure her. It was a testament to Rosalie's willpower and self control that her only outward reaction was, "I'll be at the table with Emmett," before sauntering off and leaving her with the boy.
"Edward." Bella's smile did not reach her eyes. "I did promise you a dance."
He took her hand and they glided around the room. All the while, Bella asked herself if things might have been different between the two of them. In a parallel universe maybe...if she'd gotten to know him as she'd gotten to know the rest of them her first months here...if he had not protested so vehemently to her presence in their lives...if this, if that.
"Penny for your thoughts," Edward smiled slightly.
"I thought that was your favorite thing about me?" She asked playfully. "That you can't get into my head?"
"That is true," he nodded. "A fair trade then? You tell me what's going on in your head. I'll tell you what's in mine."
"Hmmm," she smiled. "For all you know I can already see it. Maybe it's another gift that I've kept from all of you..."
Edward's confused look was indeed priceless. Her words were total rubbish of course, but Bella had ulterior motives tonight. She had a gnawing suspicion that's been burrowing inside her for weeks, and tonight she was determined to get her answers.
She made sure Edward stood between her and the rest of the family when she loosened the shoe she wore and levitated a piece of paper she had hidden under her foot to her hand. She closed her hand onto Edward's, transferring the paper into his possession. The whole thing took a second. No one saw.
Edward wouldn't pass up an opportunity like that, she thought as the song ended and she made her way back to the table. He'd read that message in private and do exactly as it said. His curiosity would surely get the better of him.
Meet me outside, please.
Under the guise of needing some fresh air, Bella left the building and ran deep into the forest, making sure to leave a trail for Edward to follow. Rosalie was difficult to thwart off, but an impromptu decision to go out for air and come back in twenty minutes convinced Alice, and therefore Rosalie, that everything was fine.
She didn't have to wait long.
"Hello," his voice sounded without warning behind her. The others, at least, had the decency to make human sounds as they approached.
"Can they hear us?" Bella asked.
He touched her shoulder. His fingers ran slowly down her arm and back up again. She resisted a shiver of contempt.
"No," he answered. "We are beyond their senses."
He stepped closer to her. They were only inches apart.
She rocked on her heels a little as she turned around and looked past him in the direction from which they came, measuring the approximate distance.
"But they're not beyond yours, are they?"
Edward furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, but even in the dark and with weak human eyes Bella saw the caution in his.
"You can still hear their thoughts, right?" She pressed on until he finally nodded.
She took a deep breath. "You knew," she exhaled.
"I beg your pardon?"
"When I came for you in Denali and we spoke outside," she whispered and kept her eyes on his. "You were quiet for so long. I begged you to come home and you stood there without making a sound... I thought you were mulling things over. But that's not it. You heard them. You could hear James' thoughts, couldn't you? They were close. We were too far from Tanya and the others for them to sense them but you could hear them..."
It was like time had stopped its merciless march forward. Bella and Edward stood facing each other in what looked like a staring contest. Bella's fists were clenched uncontrollably at her side but other than that, she matched the vampire's rigidity with her own. Edward was the first to blink.
"Yes," he breathed. "I knew."
Author's note: Bet you didn't see that one coming! The next chapter is is half done and should be out soon. In the meantime, if you're going "wtf?" you might want to reread chapter 39. Yes, this little twist was planned from then.