Chapter 5

Hermione awoke on Sunday morning with a terrible pain in her bladder. She jumped out of bed, grabbed her robe and raced to the bathroom. She had just finished pulling her pajama bottoms back up when she heard some other girls enter the bathroom speaking in rather snobby tones.

"I'm just saying if she were to maybe even run a brush through her hair she might look a tad more attractive."

"Forget the brush," one girl scoffed. "If she can't stop being such an insufferable know-it-all, she will die a lonely old hag."

The girls burst into a fit of giggles.

Hermione's face was on fire. They had to be talking about her. There was no other girl she could think of that's been called an 'insufferable know-it-all' and been told to run a brush through their hair. She tried to take a peek at who was talking through the gaps in her cubicle, but she couldn't make them out.

"Have you seen the way she's been hanging around Draco Malfoy? It's almost like she's desperate for male attention now that Potter and Weasley aren't here."

One of the girls snorted in reply. "Honestly it's agonizing to watch. Does she honestly think he would give her any time of day? She could be dressed as a Moulin Rouge showgirl and he still wouldn't even bat an eye in her direction."

The girls roared with laughter.

"It's truly embarrassing. She could never get someone with even a quarter of Malfoy's wealth."

"Forget Malfoy, Weasley couldn't even stand being with her for more than a month!"

Their giggles drifted away as they left the bathroom.

Hermione emerged from her cubicle with clenched fists and tears streaming down her cheeks.

She didn't fancy Malfoy one iota. They had been project partners and he was an interesting conversationalist and that was all! She wasn't hanging on him like some desperate hag. She simply didn't have time for a boyfriend and therefore wasn't pursuing one.

She had been with Ron for a little over a month, but it wasn't like he had grown tired of her like that girl suggested. Once the excitement of the war had worn off and they were back to their usual arguments, they had just realized that they were better suited as friends. Logically it just wasn't in the cards for her and Ron to seek anything further than friendship.

Now she was more focused on her studies and preparing for the real world.

And to think that she couldn't have anyone that was of high standing was laughable. She was Hermione bloody Granger, the brains of the Golden Trio; she could have any guy she liked!

As she approached the sink and splashed her face with water an idea popped into her head; a crazy, spiteful, brilliant idea. She'd show those girls, by obtaining a boyfriend of exceptionally high status. The problem was that she didn't socialize too often so she had to think of some boys that she was already acquainted with that was of high status.

She ran through a list of boys from each house in her head and her heart sunk. The only boy she could think of that she was on a somewhat sociable level with was Malfoy.

She walked back up the stairs to her dormitory and ran through her list another time. Again all she came up with was Malfoy.

She got dressed for the day and ran through the list again; Malfoy.

She went down to the library, grabbed a piece of parchment and wrote the list out; Malfoy.

All morning she went through every boy she knew around her age from every house and all morning she came up with the same name; Malfoy, Malfoy, Malfoy. She threw her quill down in defeat.

Fine. So Malfoy it was. She would just have to ask him today so she could get it done and over with. And if he said no then she would just have to find someone else.

This is an insane idea, she thought to herself on her way to breakfast. It might be a bit of a spiteful idea, but she couldn't stand people thinking she wasn't worth anything, especially to men.

She entered the Great Hall a little later than she normally would for breakfast, but thankfully it was Sunday so breakfast ran a little later. Luckily her usual table was relatively empty, so she didn't have to have her train of thought interrupted by some trivial conversation.

She was just finishing her grapefruit when she saw Malfoy trudge over to the Slytherin table looking absolutely dreadful. Now was the time she had to do it or she would never get the courage to at a later time.

She gulped down the rest of her orange juice and headed to the Slytherin table.

At the beginning of the year, Headmistress McGonagall had made house integration an important point of this school year. Since everyone had fought together at the Battle of Hogwarts, she felt there was no need for such segregation of the houses. Hermione agreed wholeheartedly and was pleased to see Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs and even some Slytherins lounging in the Gryffindor common room most nights.

Though there were still four large tables in the Great Hall, they were no longer assigned to a particular house. The other houses tended to mingle throughout meals while the Slytherins had a tendency to remain at what had been the Slytherin table in the past. Which was why Hermione was surprised to see two Ravenclaws and one Hufflepuff eating at the Slytherin table.

She approached the pale (and while he was always pale, she noted that he was much more pale than usual) blond and asked to speak with him outside.

Once she had finally gotten the question out, he had vomited on the ground in front of her. She jumped back in disgust and scowled.

She pulled out her wand and vanished the puddle from in front of her. "You know," She said waving her wand. "You could have just said no. I didn't realize it was that repulsive of a thought."

Malfoy wiped his mouth and leaned back on the bench he had been sitting on. "Sorry, I didn't mean to. It just kind of came out."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I can see that." She looked him over a little more critically. He really must not be feeling well; he apologized and hadn't criticized her for her ridiculous question. "Are you sure you're alright? Maybe you should head up to the hospital wing."

Malfoy scoffed. "I'm fine. I just had a little too much to drink last night and Blaise has taken all of my hangover potions."

"Well, if that's all then," Hermione plopped down next to him on the bench. "Are you going to give me an answer then?"

"Well first off, why me? And why would you need a fake boyfriend?"

Hermione recounted the conversation she overheard that morning in the bathroom.

"Ah," Malfoy said after she had finished. "So you want to tell them to basically shove it up their arses. Very Slytherin of you, Granger." He smirked at her to which she replied by sticking her tongue out at him. "But that still begs the question, why me? Why not one of your many admirers, or Potter for that matter?"

Hermione brushed his question away with a wave of her hand. "Well I wanted them to believe me, so they had to see the 'relationship'," She said while making air quotes with her fingers. "So obviously it had to be someone at school."

"Obviously," Malfoy muttered under his breath.

Hermione continued as if she didn't hear him, "And when I thought about it, most of my respectable friends didn't return this year. And to be honest, I don't really have much time for socializing, so you're really the only boy I converse with on a somewhat reoccurring basis. And I'd rather it be someone that I enjoy talking to if I'm going to be in a pretend relationship with them. Plus they really seemed to hold you on some pedestal so I think it would really let them have it if it were you I pretended to date." She smirked at her last sentence.

Malfoy nodded along as if he fully understood her reasoning. "I am quite the catch," He wiggled his eyebrows at her and she shoved his shoulder in response. "What's in it for me though?"

Hermione gaped at him. "What?"

"I mean I understand why you're doing it, and trust me I would do it out of pure satisfaction of besting someone for being stuck up bitches, but I think I should be getting something out of it too."

Hermione had thought about this. This was a mutual agreement after all, so of course he would want something out of this deal. He was just a brilliant as she, so there was no point to offer to do his schoolwork. And he had more money than he knew what to do with, so there was little point in offering him money either. No, there was one thing she could offer him in trade.

"Your image was soiled from the war and letting the Death Eaters into the castle."

Malfoy flinched. "Yes. Thank you, Granger. I hadn't noticed the loathing people seem to have for me."

"No just listen. I'm saying that your name has been tarnished." She held up her hand when he opened his mouth to reply. "What better way to improve your image than dating one third of the Golden Trio. I helped save the world and people think very highly of me. If I saw something commendable in you, perhaps other people will start to as well." She crossed her arms and leaned back with a grin.

"Very modest of you," Malfoy replied. He let out a sigh and rubbed his chin as he thought. "Fine, but when it comes time for this to end, you break up with me."

Hermione blinked at him. "Wha… what? You don't want to do the dumping?"

"If you do it then I will get pity points and you will be the girl who broke Draco Malfoy's heart. Pretty badass if you ask me." He winked at her.

Hermione rolled her eyes and then stuck her hand out. "Fine. So we have an agreement?"

Malfoy slid his hand into hers. His hand a lot stronger and much more callused than she would have thought, but a tad clammy with his current condition. She felt a slight tingle when their hands made contact.

"Yes we do." He replied, firmly shaking her hand. "Let's meet at the library later to write up some guidelines, I don't want you trying to snog me in the middle of the halls."

Hermione snorted as she withdrew her hand and wiped it swiftly on the side of her leg. "Don't flatter yourself. Now go take something, you look terrible."

Malfoy stood from the bench smirking, "Yes, dear."

…

Draco could not believe the predicament he had gotten himself into. He was going to be in a relationship with Hermione Granger; a fake relationship, but a relationship none the less.

He was shocked how completely un-disgusted he was by the idea. Shouldn't he be dry heaving at the thought of even touching her? Was he going soft? Is this what it felt like to be an overused war criminal; just completely over everything?

He had sent her a charmed note in the shape of a bird to ask her if she would rather create their contract in his room, to get a head start on the rumor mill. He figured if people saw her entering his bedroom, there was bound be a buzz about their alleged relationship in no time.

He had just finished his fifth pace around the room when there was a soft knock at his door. He could feel his blood positively humming with anxiety when he pulled the door open to reveal an equally nervous Granger.

She was wearing the same outfit as this morning, only now her hair was completely out of the plait and cascaded down her back. It looked like she had run her hands through her hair about a thousand times in the past few hours since he had seen her last.

He stepped aside to let her in and she nodded a thanks in his direction, placing a small pile of papers onto his desk. Once she had straightened her papers she glanced around the room with mild bemusement.

"Huh," She said now walking around the small room. "I thought for sure there would've been more green."

He chuckled as he looked around as well. After sleeping in the same furnishings for the past seven years, he had welcomed a new change when he was given this room at the beginning of the year. New change, new beginnings, a new life for Draco Malfoy.

The room contained the usual four poster bed, wardrobe and desk, but instead of the usual Slytherin green he had been use to, the bed featured forest green curtains and dark grey bedding. Even the Slytherin tapestry on the wall seemed more sophisticated with tones of black, forest green and dark grey. He loved how at home his new room made him feel and he had made note of the colors for when he was to find his own place to live after school ended.

His glaze slowly slid to Grange as she took in the room. He noticed how the blue sweater she was wearing was oversized, but still clung to her curves. He also noticed how her jeans hugged her bottom quite well. He shook his head and glanced at her face. Her eyes had a glint of amusement as she studied the tapestry on the wall. Her fingers skimmed over the fabric with an air of fascination. She was intrigued by the room and for some reason that gave him a sensation of satisfaction.

He cleared his throat to gain her attention and begin their work. Her eyes flitted over to him as her fingers still lingered on the tapestry.

"Sorry," She said so quietly he had to strain to hear her. "It's just much more appealing in here than I would have imagined. Is this what all of the Slytherin dormitories are like? I would have imagined them to be much more cold feeling."

He shook his head. "No, they redid the rooms for the eighth year students. It feels more… grown-up than the other dormitories."

"I like it," She breathed as she glanced at the tapestry one last time before turning to the desk. "Right. Well shall we get started then?"

"Yes." Draco held his hand out for her to take the chair while he took out his wand and transfigured a pile of books into another chair for him to sit.

Granger made herself comfortable and reached for her pile of notes. "So I made some notes on what I was thinking and then you can let me know what you were thinking."

Draco nodded in response.

She grabbed the first page and read through it briefly. It basically stated that they were to hold hands and he was to walk her to each of her classes, not matter how inconvenient it may be for him.

"What if you have class in the towers and I have one in the dungeons?"

Granger shrugged. "Well you'll just have to make do."

Draco grabbed the paper and scratched out what she had written. "How about I walk you when it's convenient for me? You don't want to seem totally dependable on me."

Granger huffed in response. "Fiiiine," She drawled out.

Draco glanced over the rest of the sheet of parchment in his hand and shook his head. "I don't do PDA."

"Well they have to have some sort of proof that we're together."

"No, I didn't even show affection to my actual girlfriends, let alone my fake one. No PDA." He stared seriously at her face.

"Alright. But I stand by the hand holding." She declared, pointing a finger to his chest.

"Deal."

They spent another hour going over the guidelines of their fake relationship. Draco had suggested they spend an equal amount of time in each other's houses, whether it be in the common room or their dormitories. Granger had suggested she eat at the Slytherin table with him for lunches and dinners. Draco had proposed they spend every evening studying together, not just a few days throughout the week. Draco also suggested that they discuss what information to tell others about their relationship every evening, so that they were on the same page. Granger agreed and stated that perhaps they should try to call each other by their first names. Draco said he was make an attempt, but there were no promises. They had both agreed that their fake relationship would last four months and would end with Granger breaking up with him over some panties she would "find" in his room.

The evening ended with them signing their names on the bottom of the contract.

"Well," Granger said as she signed her name in a flourish. "That's it then."

"So it seems. Care to make our debut tonight at dinner?" He asked as he took the quill from her and signed his name as well.

Granger sighed and leaned back in her chair. "Might as well so we can get it over and done with."

"For an idea that you came up with, you sure sound leery about it," Draco half chuckled.

"I know. This just seems like the most daunting part of it all." She sighed again.

"Come on, buttercup." He pulled her up by her hand. "Let's go show them what we're made of."

She rolled her eyes but followed him anyways. "I should have written 'no pet names' in the contract."

"Too late now, honey bunch. Now that I know it bothers you-"

Granger elbowed him in the ribs.

"Ow! Fuck, Granger, you don't like my pet names? I thought they were quite endearing."

"This is going to be a long four months," She grumbled.

"Hey, darling, your idea not mine." He smirked down at her as they made their way out into the common room, which luckily happened to be empty.

She snorted and glanced up at him with a smirk on her mouth. "Possibly the craziest idea I've ever had. But let's get it over with." She grabbed his hand entwining her fingers with his as they made their way up from the dungeons.

They took a concurrent deep breath and together stepped into the Great Hall.

Every conversation that was happening halted at once. Every head, it seemed, turned in their direction. Mouths gaped, eyes widened and a utensil or two fell from hands.

Communication erupted at once at the shock of seeing Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger walk into the Great Hall holding hands.

Gossip broke out as they made their way to the Slytherin table.

Whispers started when he put his arm around her shoulders after they sat down.

Hysteria seemed to happen when he offered her a sip of his pumpkin juice.

The Hogwarts student population could not seem to handle the fact that Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger were a couple.

Hey all! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and it gave you a little more insight on why Hermione suggested a fake relationship with Draco. I got a nice rainy day today that I was able to snuggle with my puppy and write a bit :) Thanks for reading!