Chapter Sixty Four: The Commanders
"So...a living Prothean Commander?" Admiral Hackett looked and sounded amazed for the first time in probably forever.
"Yes, sir. He's a little different than I thought however," Shepard remembered how rude he initially was.
"Before committing a full scale attack on Cerberus and the Reapers, we need resources, lots of resources. We need this Prothean, we need him for the Crucible, and we need him for knowledge. He's invaluable to us," Hackett always seemed to stare into Shepard's soul. This conversation was no exception.
"Understood, Admiral," Shepard nodded in agreement.
"We're losing colonies left and right. We consider ourselves lucky if half the population is able to evacuate. The Reapers are a foe we've never experienced. No one has ever been quicker or a more efficient enemy," Hackett's words sounded despairing, but his voice never wavered.
"The Prothean has experienced a force like this before," Shepard had to stop from shuddering. The memories he saw on Eden Prime were fast becoming his reality.
"You think he'll help us?" Hackett put his hand on his face in thought.
"I'm going to find out," Shepard's words sounded a little more menacing than he had meant.
"Good. Cerberus messed up big time, and gave us a new weapon, a new advantage. Don't waste it, Commander. Hackett out," the blue hologram of his superior shimmered and went out.
Colt was still upset with himself for flying into a rage on Eden Prime. Hackett was right, Javik was an important asset and Colt had nearly thrown that away in a fit of rage. He knew that he had a slight hot-headed personality, but that behavior was extreme. Colt saw himself as a full paragon, only killing when there were no other options. Usually the only overly aggressive thing he did was yell at people until they did what he wanted. How did he go from yelling to almost killing someone important to the war?
"Shepard, I need you in the port cargo hold," Liara's voice interrupted his disturbing thoughts. He would pick Rosebud up from his room before meeting her.
"I see, Ms. T'Soni," Shepard's voice turned deeper than its normal tone.
"It's about our new guest," Liara pointedly said. On second thought, Rosebud could stay in his room.
"Right," Colt sighed, "I'll be down in a couple of minutes." Leaving Rosebud was probably a wise choice, in case Javik decided that Varren meat was on the menu.
…
Colt didn't remember ordering anyone to guard the port cargo hold. That's exactly what he found when he went down there, two of his Ensigns with heavy gun power waiting at the door. Did Javik attack someone?
He walked into Grunt's old place to find four other guards with Javik, and Liara pacing around. Three of them held some serious firepower. Was his entire ship guarding the damn Prothean? Why didn't he know shit when he was the commanding officer?
Liara stalked up to him, fire dancing in her eyes. Something had pissed her off. "I've tried to make the room more accommodating, but they won't let me get near him or talk to him," Liara was so calm when she was angry. Maybe he needed to take notes from her.
"We apologize Doctor, but the Council's protocols for a new species says to assume hostility," Engineer Adams explained. No wonder all this had happened without his knowledge, his XO had ordered it. "I had to dust off the regulations to figure this all out," Adams smiled at Shepard.
Javik looked up slowly from where he knelt on the ground. Even from this distance, Shepard could feel how powerful Javik was in terms of biotics. Perhaps Adams was right to have so many armed guards.
"He's not new, though. I've studied Protheans my whole life," Liara was excited about Javik, he could feel it. This was a strong emotion too. Even if they weren't linked, Shepard would've been able to feel her excitement. Jealousy flowed through his veins once again, so strong it almost cancelled out Liara's excitement in his mind.
"At ease, guys. Our new guest won't be a problem," Shepard walked through the small army guarding Javik. "Will he?" Shepard said the words as more of a challenge than a question.
Javik stood up, "That depends on you."
"He won't be a problem, all of you may leave. Except for the Doctor," Shepard stared at Javik.
Engineer Adams stepped closer to Colt, "Commander, perhaps we should wait awhile-"
"That's an order," Colt didn't take his eyes off Javik once. He ordered them to leave because he knew Javik would read him soon. His crew didn't need to know what Javik would find.
"Understood Commander," Adams slapped off a salute, and proceeded to leave with the others. As soon as they left Javik lunged forward, grabbing Shepard's broad shoulders.
"I sense that you're angry at a great deal of people. You're jealous of me. I sense that you are a very troubled person. An air of guilt surrounds you everyday," Javik let him go.
"You sense?" Liara asked with confusion in her voice. Shepard breathed in relief when Liara's questions were directed at how Javik knew things, not what he knew.
"All life provides clues into individual lives for those who can read it. It's in your cells, your DNA. Memories, experiences, all those things are a biological marker. I just read his surface emotions and those that re-occur most often," Javik turned around and started playing around in some water.
"Were the visions on Eden Prime things that were imprinted on you?" Colt was eager to steer this conversation away from him.
"Precisely. That battle left a permanent marker on me, just like your experiences do to you both," Javik continued to play in water. Weird how the conversation was so serious and yet one of them was messing around with water. What was weirder was that it wasn't Colt being the odd ball.
"Is that like your beacons?" Liara asked, pacing next to Shepard. He decided to let her ask the questions for the bit. There was no need for him to ask questions, he already knew all the answers so far.
"Exactly," Javik turned around and walked forward to Colt again. The air around the two was manipulated slightly as Javik read Shepard again. The vision that Colt had received four years ago, the same one that nearly destroyed his mind, flashed through his head.
"You found one! You saw the Reapers, the destruction, all of it! Why didn't you listen? Why didn't you prepare, human?!" Javik was yelling in Shepard's face. Shepard didn't feel so bad about almost killing him earlier. Actually, he was quite happy that no had brought that up, yet. With any luck it wouldn't be mentioned.
"It's Commander," Shepard hissed the words. Javik was getting him all worked up again, "No one understood your fucking warnings, in fact the fucking beacon almost killed me."
Javik blinked a few times at him, while Liara looked mortified at him. This wasn't who he was. Maybe the goddamn cybernetic medicine made him feel angry. Maybe it was the Prothean being an asshole, or better yet, maybe it was the Prothean asshole yelling at him about something he tried so hard to prevent.
"Communication is still primitive in this cycle," Javik responded, determined to provoke Shepard.
"I did what I could. We pieced together the warnings and stopped a Reaper invasion three years ago," Shepard grumped. Liara was still looking at him oddly.
"Then the extinction was delayed," Javik wanted to die or get severely hurt. Every word that came out of his mouth only served to piss Colt more off.
"We have a plan, a weapon. The Crucible," Liara walked between the two before a rather large and deadly hole was blown through the Normandy via biotics.
"Crucible?" Javik walked towards where Liara was typing.
"The weapon your people were working on," Liara pulled up schematics on the vid screen above them, "I was hoping you could tell us how to finish it."
"We never finished it, they already...it was too late," Javik sounded sad. That made Shepard quite happy.
"So you don't know what the Catalyst is?" Shepard asked, interested in what the Prothean had to say this time.
Javik watched the schematics turn above him, "No, I was-am a soldier, not a scientist. The only thing I know is how to kill." Shepard could finally relate to Javik. He could tell by Javik's tone that he was ashamed, much like Shepard. Neither of them were proficient at anything else, there was nothing else for them except killing. They took things from the world, and added nothing. Their skill sets earned them names like heroes, but they were murderers. He realized a minute later that Thane's speeches were starting to rub off.
"What was your mission?" Liara glided past him and gave Javik a warm smile. Shepard was going to kill Javik.
"My people had avatars representing different traits. Things like bravery and strength. There was one individual who represented each," Javik returned to staring at his own reflection in the water. "I was the physical embodiment of vengeance; I am the anger of a dead people. I demand blood be spilled for the blood that was lost. My purpose, my destiny, will only be fulfilled when the last Reaper is dead. I have a single purpose, after that...there's nothing else." Shepard was getting a little uncomfortable at this point. They sounded eerily similar... no, no Shepard was not Javik. Colt was a good person, who people loved for more than just his fighting capability. There was more to his life than just defeating the Reapers, right?
Liara stepped back from Javik and walked next to Shepard. Her hands were folded over her chest, a defensive stance. She looked him over with eyes clouded with worry. Sometimes he forgot that she knew what he was feeling.
"Those who share my purpose are my allies, those that do not become casualties," Javik wasn't making eye contact with any of his four creepy eyes. Good, hopefully they had established who the alpha-male was.
"In all our years of fighting these bastards, nothing has been so clean cut," Shepard shifted his weight under Liara's gaze.
"Because you still have hope that this war will end with your honor intact," Javik was testing him, wasn't he? Questioning a Shepard's honor was a dangerous game to play.
"It will, if nothing else I will have honor," Shepard meant it. God did he mean it. If they lost, then he would die with honor. If they won, it would be with honor. There was little else that was as important.
Javik stopped looking at his reflection and stalked up to his position, "Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls and ask the ghosts if honor matters."
"Honor matters; if the dead could talk they would say the same. It separates the Reapers from us," Shepard was in Javik's face this time.
"That's the reason we lost. We had honor, while the Reapers didn't care. They were willing to do anything to win, but we only got that way at the end," Javik looked so haunted. The look was too familiar.
"We found this at the dig site," Liara said a little desperately. She was by a floating piece of Prothean memory shard.
"That is a memory shard," Javik scowled.
"Will it help with the Crucible?" Liara had this look on her face Shepard hadn't seen in a very long time. It was wonder and passion. She looked alive.
"Not at all, it contains only pain," Javik's face had the same familiar look. Then it hardened into determination, "But I will help you fight." Shepard was secretly hoping that he wouldn't help them and they could drop him off with some Enkindlers, where he would die from his own ego imploding. "The last things the Reapers will see when they're dying is the final Prothean sending them to the grave," Javik's teeth were pretty terrifying, Shepard only just noticed.
Liara glanced at Javik with uneasiness. Shepard felt bad for dragging her into this testosterone show. "Is it okay if I ask a few more questions?"
"Here it comes," Shepard laughed.
"I've written over a dozen studies on your species, I've published in several journals," the light in Liara's eyes grew. She was someone without fighting, she was a great person without a weapon, and she would be great loss to the galaxy if something happened.
"Amusing, the asari have finally grasped the concept of a written language," Javik muttered. Shepard's sensitive ears picked up everything. Perhaps Liara being here was a good thing for the Prothean, because he was about to kill off the entire Prothean race. There should be an award for self-control.
"I didn't quite catch that," Liara narrowed her eyes at him.
"Never mind, continue," Javik said quickly. He was obviously trying to get on her good side.
"Tell us about your sensory ability," Liara's eyes resumed sparkling.
"It was common amongst my people. It allows complicated ideas to be absorbed in seconds. We grew as predators, so reading a thousand details in our environment was key. Later, we developed technology that did the same," Javik explained.
"Sounds useful," he could feel Liara's mind racing.
"Ehhh," Shepard shrugged. This earned him a scary look from Liara.
"I can feel the turmoil inside of you from seeing the extinction of our race. It forever changed the fabric of your being," Javik was currently looking into soul.
"Hey Javik, mind not revealing all my secrets in one day? I like to be mysterious," Shepard threw an arrogant smile at Liara. Javik grunted at him. "Anyways, Liara would never forgive me if I didn't ask this. What was Prothean civilization like?"
Liara was almost jumping up and down. Shepard would have to figure out a way to impress her even more than Javik did. She definitely skipped towards Javik, "Oh yes! I've always wondered about these sort of things. What kind of government did you have? Tell me about your religious beliefs, and perhaps the-"
"We are dead now, what does it matter?" Javik asked. He could feel Liara's spirit getting trampled on.
Colt unfolded his arms from his chest, "You piece of-"
"I'm sorry, it's just that studying your history has been a lifelong passion of mine," Liara cut him off and shot him a look of disbelief. He shot her back a look of 'Really, this guy is your new crush?'
"When I was born, the Reapers were already attacking. The first thing I saw was my planet burning," Javik was heading to familiar territory again. "Before the attack we were the dominant species."
"My studies indicate that you were the only ones engaged in space travel. I always found that curious," Liara was giving this guy way too much attention.
"There were multiple species under one rule. Eventually, everyone called themselves Prothean," Javik's voice was getting way too throaty. What was happening?
"What happens if they didn't want too?" Shepard wasn't interested in the answer.
"They weren't given a choice," Javik said. Colt smiled furiously. Maybe this was his chance to make Javik look bad.
"So you enslaved the other species?" Colt felt like the bad cop in an interrogation. It was glorious.
"They could oppose us if they wished, and if they won they would be in charge. Many tried, and all failed," Javik chuckled slightly.
Liara looked so crushed. Yep, Shepard was being the asshole. He should've let her live in ignorant peace. "I didn't know the Protheans were so...severe," Liara said.
What was he doing? Did he just notice that he was a total asshole or was Javik making him this way? "It was out of necessity. Early on machines rebelled against us," Javik was so calm. It made Colt feel worse. How did he have any friends if he was always like this? "We couldn't let the machines live, so it was decided that we had to unite all the organic life."
"Did it work?" Liara's excitement was back. Having a total jerk as a boyfriend was not going to bring her down.
"For a little, the Metacon War. The tides were turning until the Reapers attacked," Javik sounded sad again. This time Shepard felt bad, it was a step. "Then we realized that machines had surpassed us long ago, in ways none of us can fathom," Colt realized that there was a bigger asshole than him- The Reapers.
"Back on Eden Prime there were other stasis pods. What happened exactly?" Shepard was trying to make up for his behavior earlier.
"Our empire had been destroyed and we knew everything was coming to a close. We were the final vanguard, the best soldiers alive," Javik was obviously in an awful position. Colt could feel more guilt being added on, he had been a terrible person to the Prothean.
"More of you were supposed to survive?" Liara was close to squealing. Truth be told, Shepard was glad more hadn't survived. He was barely beating one off Liara. She would've certainly left him if there were lots of Protheans.
"Yes, a new empire would've been constructed under my leadership. We would've commanded this cycle during the Reaper fight. However, traitors in our rank, indoctrinated members, betrayed us and the Reapers discovered our plan," Javik looked lost in memories.
"How would you have commanded us exactly?" Shepard wasn't a big fan of enslavement.
"By giving you no choice. Join us, or fight the Reapers alone," Javik rumbled. He was making Liara dislike him without Shepard's help...excellent.
"Did you used to study our ancestors?" Shepard gestured to himself and Doctor T'Soni.
"Yes, we cultivated species that showed potential. Eventually you would be invited to join us. When the Reapers attacked, we ceased our studies. We hoped they would see you as too primitive," Javik glanced between the two of them. An awful part of Shepard was glad the Protheans died off; he didn't want to join their empire.
"Thanks… I think," Colt shrugged. "Is there anything, anything at all about the Crucible you can tell us?" He pleaded.
"Just the stories. They told us about our scientists making a great machine, capable of defeating the Reapers," Javik nodded his head slightly, like a confirmation of the memory.
"You never saw it?" Colt was shocked.
"By that time, the Empire was in pieces. None of us knew what other sectors were doing," Javik acted like he barely remembered any of this.
"If we don't finish it soon, the same will be of us," Liara muttered darkly.
"Thanks for the confidence booster, lemon cake," Colt laughed at Liara's funny pet name. He was the only one. "Tell us about your fight with the Reapers," he quickly changed the subject.
"It lasted for centuries, but memory shards gave us memories of what happened," Javik was back into it. His voice wasn't unsure this time.
"Do you know anything about Illos?" Liara questioned. Every time he heard Illos, a fire was ignited inside him. Maybe because some of his best memories were equated with the word. He tried to catch Liara's eye, but she wasn't paying attention to him.
"Like the Crucible, I know Illos only in stories and rumors," Javik looked fierce.
"The Protheans there managed to stop the Citadel from being controlled a couple years back," Shepard realized how that sounded. "Not live Protheans, a programmed VI. I'm sorry, but no one lived," Colt felt so guilty about his earlier actions.
"I've never been to the Citadel, it was captured long before I was born," this deflated Javik again. He leaned against his pond thing.
Perhaps the most important question was asked by Colt, "Why did you lose the fight?"
"What was our strength became our greatest weakness. All of the races followed similar rules, the same doctrine, one strategy. The Reapers exploited this, we were goners. We could not adapt when needed. The smaller species became divided and confused," Javik stood back up.
"I'm happy to report that our cycle is different. Most races cooperate, but we still remain unique," Liara brought a little hope to Colt.
"Then it may be your only hope," Javik said menacingly. Liara had turned to observe Shepard while Javik spoke. Her eyes were still sparkling with admiration.
"I agree," Liara replied. Colt got the feeling that she wasn't talking about the galaxy's uniqueness.
"Thanks for talking with us, it has been enlightening," Colt meant it.
"It has been amusing for me," Javik stepped forward when Shepard did. He decided against another handshake. "It's funny to see the most primitive races of my time ruling the galaxy now," Javik spoke down upon them. Colt decided then and there that it was the Prothean who made him act differently. "The asari, the turians, the humans," Javik shook his head.
"The salarians," Liara pointed out.
"The lizard people evolved?" Javik was almost laughing, almost.
"I believe they're amphibian," Liara crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. He could feel how off put she was by him. The two stared at each other for a few long moments.
"They used to eat flies," Javik's voice was gentle. Shepard had to think of some horrible things to keep himself from laughing. It didn't help that he could totally see it. "I have a question for you two now. Are you two...attached?"
Colt bounded up to Liara and threw an arm around her shoulders. Then he proceeded to plant a messy kiss on her cheek. "Nope," Colt announced. His joke did not seem to make sense in Javik's mind, so he looked at the pair in confusion. "Yes, Javik, yes we are," Colt couldn't have any fun with anyone anymore.
"You could do better," Javik told Liara.
"What the hell?" Shepard had never met someone so blatantly mean.
"On that note, I think we're going to leave now," Liara grabbed Shepard by the hand and led him out.
…
Liara could not explain what had happened between Javik and Colt. It was like a constant one upping that had caused tension that was almost visible. So many emotions had gone through Shepard that she couldn't keep track. Then there was Javik, who was disappointing. In fact she didn't really want to think about him for awhile.
"What was that?" Liara asked once they were out of Javik's room. Shepard was glaring at the ground like it was the most interesting thing on the Normandy since the elevator upgraded from soul crushing slow to molasses. Then it hit her. "Commander Colt Shepard, were you jealous?"
"No," Colt mumbled. He wasn't making eye contact.
"I do believe you were," Liara shot him a smug look. It felt weird to have someone get jealous over her, she was still getting used to the idea that Shepard liked her and it had been four years. In the heat of the moment, Liara stole a kiss from her Commander.
"What was that for?" Shepard panted afterwards.
"For being you," Liara whispered, "You still didn't answer my question."
"Only a little, but it didn't help that Javik was being an asshat. Plus he was revealing some...unpleasant things. Actually I'm surprised that he didn't mention my cybernetic troubles. Shouldn't that be a marker in my soul power or whatever?" Shepard laughed at his own joke, per usual. Liara wasn't listening, however. Being reminded of her best friend and her lover's condition was devastating each time. Time had not allowed the truth to become easier. "You with me, lemon cake?" Shepard laughed at his own words, again. It was a never ending cycle.
"Yeah, I need to get things done," Liara turned from him and headed for the elevator.
...
"Hey Broker," Colt's teasing voice filled Liara's room. "Are you brokering deals?" Shepard snorted in laughter, but Liara remained silent. "Okay I get that my pun wasn't the greatest, but we can at least pretend I'm funny," he sat down next to her. Her head was turned the other way. "Liara?" Even Rosebud licking her hand violently caused no reaction.
She turned to look at her screens, but remained silent. The light from her monitors made her cheeks shine. With a start Shepard realized that she was crying. "Uhhh...Liara?" Colt asked desperately. He had never been equipped with the gift of comforting people. She continued to look at her screen and quietly cry. "Are you feeling blue?" Colt's last defense is humor.
No one has ever said a joke that managed to simultaneously be super corny, make the person it was directed at feel worse, insult the entire galaxy, and over use an already clichéd joke. Shepard had a gift. As soon as the blue joke left his mouth Liara started crying harder. He wasn't good at things like this; he was good at blowing people's heads off. Was he supposed to go away? Or maybe he was supposed to pat her shoulder.
"What's wrong?" Colt patted her shoulder. Emotional stuff was a little bit too much for Shepard to handle. Perhaps that's why the L-word was so mysterious and unused.
Liara reply was a look so hopeless; it twisted his insides into knots. That single look was what he expected to see in the mirror if the Reapers won. He was going to kill or fix whatever had caused Liara to look this way. Then reality hit him so hard his breathing halted for a few seconds.
Colt was the source. This, this was the very reason he had broken up with her. He didn't want to be the cause of such an awful look. What had he done? Oh yes, the cybernetic comment by Javik's place. Shepard should've known what he had done when Liara left so abruptly. He could not, would not stay here.
"Shepard," Liara called out after him when he got up. He left her room without stopping. The new destination was the med bay. Rosebud licked the scarred flesh on his right hand; he was making everyone feel bad.
Eve and Mordin were the only two in the med bay at the moment. "Mordin," Shepard called. This caused the scientist to look up at him. "Please help me," Colt stopped in front of his friend.
"Problem?" Mordin put a hand to his face and looked Shepard over. Then he started petting Rosebud, who was partially his.
"My cybernetics," Colt admitted. When Mordin said nothing Shepard stepped closer. "Please Mordin, the Normandy needs me. The galaxy needs me; I have to stop the Reapers!" The salarian remained silent. "I don't wanna die, okay?" This was much quieter.
"Good friend, great friend. We'll go over things with Chakwas, see what happens," Mordin finally said.
"Thank you, thank you so much," Shepard gave Mordin an enormous hug.
"Friends," Mordin smiled warmly at his Commander, his friend.