Chapter 60.

Hello there, it's been a while. Still alive. Cheers and enjoy.

Torian put the vibrorazor down and ran his hands against and with the grain of his skin.

His face was clean, smooth and alien.

For the first time in what felt like a lifetime he looked himself in the mirror and observed how time and injuries had changed him.

He had new scars from his last caress with death. His entire left side had a pink hue and his skin was smooth and untouched by the hardships that life had chosen to teach him with. The skin on that side of his body was baby soft. Flesh, bone and muscle had been regrown on that side but it left his other side looking older, haggard and worn by comparison. He felt relief as he turned his face from one side to the other that it was not split down the middle. He had lost most of one of his scars on his cheeks.

He grunted as he nodded at his reflection and pulled on his clothes. He cleaned up his fresher from the remains of hair and beard. He returned to the galley and continued his cooking extravaganza. To be fair, most of the work had been done already but he checked the oven to make sure the tiingular was cooking even. He dreaded that it would be dry. Dry tiingular was just the worst.

Torian looked at the table and saw that there were still boxes and a datapad piled onto it. He began to set it for two, moving boxes of stuff he did not care to check and a bucket of their trophies from their early Skar'kla hunt. They had collected a whole slew of claws in different shapes and sizes and Raidre had been determined to incorporate them in Torian's next chest bowls. Torian had not known he was getting anything new up until that moment, nor did he know why.

He moved the claws aside and brought them to her workbench where he saw a bunch of new materials gathered on her main worktable and in boxes beneath it. Torian poked around and whistled in appreciation as he came across what looked suspiciously like Beskar. He scratched the surface a few times before licking it. He beamed as he confirmed the metal and put it back in the box he had found it.

"Guess this was "the good stuff" Skadge had bought his place here with."

Torian shook his head from side to side but smiled despite himself.

Yea… Even he would let a psycho like that live with them for a whole crates worth of Beskar.

He eyed the designs Raidre had left on her workbench and had to marvel at her ambition and ingenuity. He looked at the bowls with their compartments for oil, jet packs integrated at the rear and extra thick plating near the front because Torian always faced his opposition head on.

The more he read the designs, potential add-ons and integrated systems, the more he realized just how well she knew him. He put the notes and designs back as they had been before he had read them. He turned to walk away and leave it without a word when he saw that on the stairs was where she stood.

She chewed on a nail as she stared at him. Torian looked at her wide-eyed.

"You like them?" she spoke with a tremble in her voice.

His face softened as he smiled. "Yea, a lot."

She stopped chewing and smiled back as the weight melted from her features. "Don't tell me what I want to hear."

Torian looked away as he felt a blush creep up on him. "Never have to."

He looked up and saw she restrained her lips from their upward curve, tight and cheeks flexed. He grinned at her and she giggled as she tucked some of the hair that always found its way to her face behind her whole ear.

"It was going to be a surprise, but I'm not mad you found it since you like it."

Torian sighed. "Didn't mean to snoop."

Raidre shook her head. "Don't worry about it."

He walked up the stairs to join her. He took her cheek and moved her face to its side to plant a light kiss on the burnt and tattooed side of her face. He kissed above that spot. And again above that spot.

"Hungry?" he whispered after he had kissed his way up to her scared ear.

Raidre held onto his waist and shivered. "Getting there." She admitted.

Torian pulled her in for a full embrace and inhaled her scent. "Good. Hungry too."

Raidre chuckled. "Can I pull out the Netra'gal and the whiskey?"

Torian smirked. "It's just us, so why not?"

Raidre pushed at him a bit and he gave her room as he looked down. She took her turn to grab his face and turned it from side to side. She chewed on her lower lip. "You're ¾ short of a scar."

Torian nodded. "For now."

Raidre sucked in a breath. "I am NOT helping you with that."

Torian chuckled as he ruffled her hair and disengaged. "Never asked anyone for help."

Raidre pouted but followed his lead as he led her to the galley. "No lone wolf act for you, mister!"

Torian shrugged. "Meant with this." He said as he pointed to his still whole scar.

Raidre pulled out her whiskey and his Netra'gal. "Yea, don't think Corridan would be down to help you mess with that cute face of yours."

Torian stuck his tongue out and feigned disgust as he opened their freezer to retrieve ice for the cups. She offered the cups and he threw a couple of oversized ice cubes in each. Raidre began to fill each with their owners preferred poison. She offered him the Netra'gal. They sipped as Raidre eyed the oven.

"So, why did you do it?"

"Hmm?" Torian looked up from his glass.

Raidre gestured to his face. "I mean, you may not like this, but you're beautiful, why scar yourself?"

Torian grined and leaned on the counter. "Exactly." He said as he pointed at her with his hand that held his glass.

Raidre narrowed her eyes a bit, as she kept looking at him. "Now would be a good time to use whole sentences, and explain a bit." She teased as she crossed her arms and cocked a hip at him.

Torian took a swig and his entire cup of Netra'gal down with it. "That's the kind of night, is it?"

Raidre frowned but picked up Torian's bottle. She offered to fill his cup. He offered his glass. She filled it.

"I'm curious, but not enough to prod where I'm not welcome." She said as she place bottle back down on the counter.

Torian frowned and shook his free hand. "Always welcome."

"You can always ask back, a trade?" she offered as she raised one brow.

Torian frowned as he thought about it, eyes on the oven, and then looked back at her. "Sounds fair. No holds barred." He offered her his glass.

Raidre frowned but affirmed. "Okay, but you're the secretive one between us."

Torian smirked. "We'll see."

They clinked glasses and both emptied their cups in a single swing. Raidre exhaled. "Man, we're gonna be angry drunks in 2 hours by this rate."

"Not before supper." Torian said as he looked back at the oven, biting his lower lip.

Raidre chuckled as Torian pulled out his tiingular. She gasped as she inhaled its rich aromas and got a good look at it.

"Gyula never cooked the veggies with the meat!" Raidre moved her finger towards the egde of the pan. "What spices-!"

Torain smacked her hand away before she could dip it into the tiingular.

"Hot."

Raidre pouted. "Sorry."

Torian straightened and put the gloves down. "Bowls?"

Raidre straightened and skipped towards the dinner table to retrieve the two bowls set there. When she reached Torian she presented the bowls. He used a ladle to fill them both and took the bowl he decided was his. "If you want more, round two."

Raidre smiled. "Cheers to that."

They went back to the table and sat down facing each other. Torian looked up from his food as he began to mix the contents of his bowl.

"Been eating here a while."

Raidre smirked. "You've been with us on the Mantis for what now?"

Torian eyes narrowed a smidge as he blinked a couple of times in silence.

Raidre mused. "Counting your sojourn away. Of course."

He snorted as he took a first bite. "'Bout a year."

"Krif, time goes fast!" Raidre swore.

Torian beamed. "Been having a good time."

Raidre gave Torian that sharp and loaded smile she had given him in his first months on the Mantis. It made his heart skip a beat as she looked at him as if she could eat him.

"A lot lately." She said.

Torian cleared his throat as heat reached from his chest to his cheeks. He got up and went back to the counter to grab a basket and came back to place it on the table between them. The contents of the basket were wrapped in a simple rough linen. Raidre frowned at him and reached to unveil the bounty within.

The bread was course with lots of grains and a dark almost indigo colour to the dough. Raidre was taken a back a moment. Torian grabbed a piece and dunked it his bowl. The indigo dough became purple from the marron coloured juices of the meat. Torian groaned in appreciation.

"Best if you dunk the bread." He said between bites.

Raidre took a spoonful of the tiingular to test it. She was surprised by its bold flavor and its texture. Moreover, it was not the kind of spicy she was expecting. She dunked her bread and continued to eat his meal his way.

"When I was young, we stopped in Correlia for a job." Torian began between mouthfuls.

Raidre ate in silence as he told his story. Alternating between bread and spoon.

"This family took me in when I wound up getting separated from the clan."

Raidre stopped moving, she looked away from the spoon that was halfway to her mouth and waited in silence. Torian played with his food across from her, moving his spoon around this way and that as he let his face fall, jaw in palm. He looked up at her, his bright blue eyes calm and untouched beneath the weight of light coloured lashes. Raidre continued to eat as she waited.

"Was scared and lost. The place stank. Had never been there, didn't know my way around. Got lost and this older couple found me. They took me in, fed me. But when it came time to get washed up, they saw what was normal for a Mandalorian child."

Raidre sighed. "Guess you had more bruises and scars than most Mando kids though. What with all the bullying."

Torian grunted. "This family saw it as abuse.

"Wasn't it a bit, though?" Raidre cut in.

Torian frowned. "Arue'tals' don't get to whine that they have it hard. Grateful that they let me live and didn't cast me out."

Raidre took another bite, lingering on licking her spoon as her brow furrowed. "I still don't like it." She admitted while maintaining eye contact.

Torian's eyes soften as he blinked. He glanced away as he let both of his arms rest on either sides of his meal. "Neither did I. But I'm atin and I don't give up."

Raidre took another bit as her shoulders and posture relaxed. Torian relaxed with her and took another bite too. "They didn't hear me sneak up on them as they planned to kidnap me."

Raidre sighed. "I'm sure they thought they were doing what was best for you."

Torian chewed on his spoonful. "Yea, sure they did."

Raidre waited, but when Torian did not continue, she took a swig of her whiskey. "Guessing you didn't let them take you away?"

Torian shook his head. "No. Couldn't."

"But why?" Raidre wound up asking him.

He looked up eyes wide a moment. He shrugged and sighed. "Mom died so I wouldn't be dar'manda. Couldn't dishonor her by running away 'cause it was tough."

Raidre sighed. "You made it back?"

"Eventually, Corridan ended up finding me. We rendez-vous-ed with the rest on schedule."

Raidre took another sip of her whiskey. "What does this have to do with your scars?"

He looked up as if woken from a daydream. "That family, they kept saying how normal, cute and well behaved I was."

Raidre smirked. "Disciplined even as a child."

Torian shrugged. "Had to be. It was expected.

Raidre tilted her head to the side. "Guess they did they could pass you off."

"Yea. They did."

"Ah." Raidre laughed. "Ironic. We have eerily similar reasons for our scars."

Torian chuckled. "Yea, ish."

Raidre snickered. "Context different, reasons similar."

"Started scarring my cheeks after that. Dissuade anyone else who'd get weird ideas."

"That," Raidre said pointing a spoon at him. "Must have sucked."

Torian shrugged. "Did the flame to your face suck?"

Raidre sucked in a breath through gritted teeth. "Torian I passed out from the pain. I was hospitalized and was damned lucky I didn't lose my eye."

Torian blinked at her. "Yea, it didn't suck near that bad."

Raidre stuck out her tongue. "Still, must take quite a few passes for it to scar that well."

Torian snickered. "Or a lot of picking."

"Ugh, no! Really?!" Raidre cried.

Torian laughed aloud. "Ah, your face!"

"Like, the scabs? You picked the scabs?!" she cried out louder and louder.

Torian kept laughing so hard he could not muster the words, so he just acknowledged as he took a moment to get a handle on himself. He sighed once he was calm. "Only at first, but got a scalpel. Didn't feel the need to."

Raidre shuddered. "That still sounds hella painful."

"Well, it's no walk in the park, but there's still worse."

Raidre rolled her eyes. "There is always worse."

Torian pointed his bread stained purple by the tiingular spices. "How is it?"

Raidre was mid-bite. "Your tiingular is super gamey, what did you use?"

Torian waged a finger at her. "Chef's secret, not spicy?"

Raidre shook her head. "Spicier than I am used to, but the bread does all the work to help with that. Kind of shocked you let me have bread."

Torian shrugged and grinned with a boyish look on his face. "Didn't want to send you running."

Raidre grinned. "From you?"

Torian looked up but said nothing. Raidre's face softened and she reached a hand out towards him. He took it and for a moment they just sat together holding hands. Raidre quirked a brow.

"You're the best hunting partner a girl could ever ask for, a deadly shot, and you're a rock star in bed, how could I run from such a solid deal?"

Torian blushed a dark red and could not look at her, but he did not pull his hand away. "Now you're just saying what I want to hear."

Raidre shook her head from side to side. "Nah-uh. 100% honesty at this table tonight. We clinked on it. No holds barred, remember?"

Torian looked up at her and she smiled. She squeezed his hand before pulling away to finish the meal he had made her.

"Glad you like."

Raidre smirked. "Honestly? From now on, you make tiingular, yours is way better than mine."

Torian snorted. "We'll see."

"You're turn."

Torian looked at her, and rubbed his chin, he frowned, as his bear chin was a lot less comfortable to rub. Raidre chuckled. "Miss the beard?" She asked.

"Didn't until now."

Raidre chuckled. "I missed your face though. Couldn't see you under all that hair."

Torian ran his hands through his hair, barely two inches in all. "Not too short?"

Raidre got up and sat in the chair next to him, she pulled his hair on either side and began to measure and compare the sides. "You're not even."

Torian frowned. "Just gonna shave it."

Raidre grabbed his shoulders. "No, before you do that, can you just try letting me even it out?"

Torian frowned at her; she kept her hands on his shoulders. "Okay, but not tonight."

Raidre beamed. "Deal!"

Torian took a spoon and prepped it. "You said you had a sister?"

Raidre sat down and began to pick at her food. "Two actually. I think I only mentioned the older one though, or did I mention both? I forget. One is a doctor and the other became a lawyer."

Torian nodded. "Must have been hard to get cast out from the family."

Raidre sighed. "My folks and I had never had the best relationship growing up. On Dromuund Kaas, it is best to see children, but not hear them. I remember my mother being warm with me, but than my biological father became an alcoholic and after that divorce, my mother was looking for any way to save us financially."

Torian agreed. "Did she?"

Raidre dipped her chin and pursed her lips. "She married an admiral in the Empire's army."

Torian chewed on his tiingular. "Guess things changed?"

Raidre sunk her face in the cradle of her hands. "Yea, they were never the same again. Everything became formal, our grades were compared and everything became a competition. Nothing was fun anymore." She sighed. "Except when uncle Gyula came to visit. But until they hired him on as my bodyguard, there wasn't many times when I was allowed to see him."

Torian frowned. "Friends?"

Raidre shook her head. "Not unless Admiral Ravera approved of them first."

Torian whistled. "That's shit."

Raidre laughed. "Yea, Ravera was a piece of work. Rai'Drynn wasn't my birth name ya know."

Torian frowned. "What was it?"

"Kiera. But, that was too foreign sounding, so we all got new names."

"Wow." Torian said as he finished his first bowl. "No wonder you hate that name, that guy was a kriffin' shabuir."

Raidre snickered. "It's okay; I got disowned for a very good reason."

Torian quirked a brow at her and gestured at her with his clean spoon. "Tell me."

Raidre grinned. "He was a closeted chubby chaser; I made sure the entire Empire militia knew about it before I left."

Torian blinked. "You holoed something gross to everyone, didn't you?"

Raidre nodded. "Anything less and it wouldn't have stung enough."

Torian whistled. "Bet that didn't do the rest of your kin any good."

Raidre shrugged. "We weren't really kin anymore. But, I send them credits every month. The credits gets debited, so I know it's being used. Clearly they don't hate me enough to want nothing to do with me."

"Creds don't count."

Raidre shrugged. "I'll take whatever life gives me, especially if doesn't hurt me or my own."

Torian agreed but his face remained placid as a calm lake. "Who counts as yours?"

Raidre took another bite of her food. "Isn't it obvious? Everyone on this ship, and whomever they drag on-board."

Torian gave her a crooked smile. "So Corridan?"

"Of course! Even Kevain, but I swear!" Raidre said with eyes wide, jaw firm and clenching her spoon like she would a hunting knife. "That boy jump scares me one more time, he's losing a tooth!"

Torian laughed aloud and even snorted. "Yea, he has that effect on people."

Raidre inhaled through her nostrils hard enough to flare them and exhaled through parted but tight lips. "I thought Mako was exaggerating about him. Oh, how wrong I was…"

Torian snickered as he got up. He gestured to her bowl and Raidre handed it over. "Not even breaking a sweat."

Raidre grinned. "You're not the only one who likes spicy."

Torian smirked. "Good to know."

Torian filled their bowls while Raidre filled their glasses. He placed her bowl down in front of her and sat down across from her. He pulled out a vial from behind the basket of bread and pulled the bread away before Raidre could grab for it.

"Let's up the ante." He goaded.

Raidre eyed the vial. "What is that and why is it purple?"

Torian looked from side to side checking to see if anyone else was around or could hear. Raidre giggled knowing they had the Mantis to themselves for the rest of the evening. He cupped a hand over his mouth to whisper.

"Trandoshian Rusfk."

Raidre blinked a few times before leaning in and cupping a hand on her mouth. "What's that?"

Torian gave her a smug look. "The spiciest shit you're ever gonna eat."

Raidre snickered. "Oh my gosh, we are going to regret this!"

Torian beamed. "So you're in?"

Raidre nodded. "You said no bread that just means we have to drink more."

Torian frowned. "Didn't think this through."

"Oh no!" Raidre waged a finger. "No backing out now! Not when I've accepted your challenge!"

Torian smirked. "We're gonna need more alcohol."

Raidre beamed. "Just so happens I got us something while I was on that shit-hole Belsavis."

Torian blinked. "Skadge had more than just Beskar to buy his place?"

Raidre snorted. "That psycho paid a lot for his temporary home here."

Raidre got up and walked to the cupboard. With a flourish, she opened them to reveal rows upon rows of the ox blood alcohol. Torian's eyes bulged. "Pantoran moonshine, anyone?" she called with a smile that displayed all her pearly whites.

"Woah." Torian breathed as he stared wide-eyed at the pantry.

Raidre grinned. "I know. Alcohol is ruined for us forever."

Torian frowned. "We're still getting Netra'gal, right?" he asked with a shaking voice

Raidre giggled. "Of course, I ain't giving up my whiskey and sometimes my sake either, Tor."

Torian grunted. "Good."

Raidre pulled out a bottle and closed the cupboard doors. She sat back down on her seat and placed the bottle in the middle of the table.

"Okay, let's do this."

Torian uncapped the little bottle and poured half of the bottle on his bowl and half on hers. Raidre's eyes bulged from their sockets as she stared in silence. Torian threw the empty bottle in the garbage can without getting up. It went straight in and did not touch the rim.

"Toast." He winked at her.

Raidre looked at her bowl as she began to stir. "Well, it was nice knowing you."

Torian began to stir. "Should be fine."

Raidre paused and stared at him. "You like spicy, Tor, and this is the spiciest shit you ever had?"

Torian nodded. "Yep."

"And you just emptied the entire kriffin' bottle between two bowls."

Torian's eyebrow twitched as he finished mixing and stared at his spoonful. "Yep."

Raidre looked from him to his spoon and back at him. "We're gonna die."

Torian frowned and shook his head still staring at his spoon much like a wild animal would stare at a predator that just popped out into a clearing. "It'll be fine."

Raidre stared at the food eyes bulging. "So what's the hold up?"

Torian's lips became a hard pressed line as he glanced at her and then back it. "Working up to it."

Raidre shrugged and took a bite of her food.

Torian stared wide-eyed at her as she chewed, his spoon still at chest level. Neither said a word as Raidre silently grabbed for the Pantoran moonshine and uncapped the bottle. She poured herself a glass as she filled her spoon again. Raidre took a sip and sniffled as she inhaled. She raised her glass to Torian.

"What's wrong?" she asked with a hoarse voice. "Lose your appetite?"

Torian blinked and took the Pantoran moonshine. He poured himself a glass, downed its entire contents and then began to eat.

They ate in silence, both sniffling within their first few bites. Before long there were tears and sweat on both their brows. Torian sighed and exhaled through swollen lips half way through his bowl.

"Sorry." He said as he wiped more tears from his eyes with the back of his hands, his face ruddy with heat.

Raidre chewed and sipped. "What for?" she asked as she poured more Pantoran moonshine to her glass.

She had gone through most of the bottle by herself.

Torian sighed as he looked at her, his face softening. "You're drunk."

Raidre hiccuped. "Yep."

Torian chuckled. "Go home."

Raidre looked around confused. "I would, but-" she looked back at him. "I'm afraid to stand."

Torian laughed, covering his mouth with a closed fist while his other arm came to wrap around himself. He exhaled in appreciation of her drunkenness.

"Want me to carry you?"

Raidre took another bite. Her entire face was a bit swollen and red from the spices. She kept eating as she sighed and closed her eyes in a day dream.

"I'd like that." She said as she took another bite. "That would be nice. But you made me food."

Torian looked at her much as he would look at an adorable child. "You don't have to finish."

Raidre wrapped an arm around her bowl and continued to eat. "You made it, gotta finish it."

Torian frowned. "Can you taste it anymore?"

Raidre froze. "I haven't tasted anything since like the third bite."

Torian laughed and stood up. Raidre pulled her bowl to her chest and looked up at him with large and helpless eyes. "But I'm almost done."

Torian took the bowl from her, grabbed a napkin and wiped her face. She just looked at him with big eyes and her lower lip trembled. His brows creased together and he kissed the tip of her nose. He wrapped an arm on the back of her chair and the other on the table.

"Couch & cuddles?"

Her eyes lit up and she nodded once.

Torian picked her up.

Raidre allowed Torian to pick her up, her arms wrapping around his neck and her body relaxed in his grasp as he picked her up. He turned but didn't get far when she reached for the bottle and grabbed it before he got far enough. Torian took them to the lounge and sat down with her in his lap on the couch. She stayed cradled in his arms, her lips curved up.

"Sleepy?"

Raidre groaned. "A bit, but not ready for it yet."

Torian began to rub her neck with his right arm. He grabbed the moonshine with his left and uncapped it with his teeth. Raidre raised her head from his shoulder and looked at him as he took a swig.

"You can still feel the burn, huh?"

Torian sighed. "Yea. You win."

Raidre frowned. "Win what?"

Torian kissed her cheek. "Beat the spice. You're a keeper."

Raidre grinned. "Shoulda gotten drunk with me."

Torian shrugged and then grinned. "Didn't wanna get too drunk."

Raidre narrowed her eyes then widened as she grinned. "Oh, you're the keeper!"

Torian shrugged. "Nah, just got my priorities straight – keeping you satisfied is up there."

Raidre blushed as she grinned. She kissed him. "Glad we talked."

Torian pulled her back in for more, hand at the base of her neck, fingers locked in her hair. He pulled away with both of their hearts racing and panting. He touched his brow to hers. "Me too."