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Choi Young was sitting in a darkened bedroom, the only place where he found peace without fail, always; but tonight peace escaped him even here. The general was intently staring at his hands. These hands have not killed in a long while. The smell of blood no longer haunted him in his dreams and instead, the fragrance of Eun Soo's hair and skin invaded his senses. These hands knew every centimeter of her body and now they have killed again. He killed his friend; maybe, not with his sword, but the man died for him. If Jae Su did not block the blow, it might have been him, bleeding out the last drops of his life up there, on the roof.
He never asked for this. He did not require protection, he's been a hair length away from death before and never had he somebody stand between him and the blade. His hands were capable of keeping him alive all this time. He wished he would have killed the assassin himself. He wished his sword would have been bathed in the blood of the one who murdered Jae Su. But it was him. The prophecy, the seer, his ability - they led another man to sacrifice his own precious life in exchange for some phantom fantasy of rearranging the past.
"Come. Your bath is ready."
"You go ahead without me."
She sighed. Her hand reached to comfort him, but she stopped midair. This man was alone in his grief. He just lost somebody who was the only connection to his past. What he was going through was his and his alone.
From where she stood, she could only begin to imagine his pain. Her heart was breaking so much lately for Choi Young. But all she could do for him was to cry on his behalf. Woodalchi's tears were sparse; as generous as he was to her, as miserly he was toward himself.
She also cried for Jae Su, this man she believed to be a dangerous callous assassin turned frenemy, turned good man and an irreplaceable friend. He was gone forever. If they go back in time, will she meet him again? If they go? They? Eun Soo sighed again, watching the man she loved suffer in solitude he required. Tears began dropping again, like rain.
Before I knew her, before I knew the value of life, the price of love, these hands did not know their true purpose. If I touch her, would I taint her?
"Stranger, don't be too hard on yourself."
"Mm." His eyes closed, lost in thought.
He was lost. The assassin's revelation, his promise to Jae Su and a foreboding feeling of the future looking bleaker and more dangerous than ever was gnawing at him. There was one person who had the answers, the one he did not want to see, but whom he needed to seek out.
. . .
Choi Young carried Jae Su in his arms all the way down the stairs. He thought his friend would not like the elevator ride...
They buried Jae Su under a tall fir tree. Choi Young wore traditional Korean dress he had on when he emerged from the Hwata's Gate. He carefully placed Jae Su's sword in the man's hands before his body was covered with dirt.
There is not much to say or describe. Somber and solemn. The world around is dimmed, the wind ruffles the tall grass on the hill and the sun tickles the skin; the sea beneath rumbles as it was 700 years ago, the sky above still blue and the tree will stand here peaceful and unaware. It's all good.
This spot was easy to pick. He will remember it and come back. Such places don't change much over centuries. It's all good.
Young-ah, promise me.
He never had a brother, this was as close as he came to having one.
I promise.
If only to meet him again, if only to right the wrongs of their youthful ignorance, if only to give him a hug and say something sappy... Jae Su would laugh and tease and make fun of him, but who cares... Can he meet him again?
. . .
"The water is getting cold."
Too many thoughts, too many feelings, crowding in his head, seeking resolution. He burred comrades before. But with Jae Su's death the burden of choice had fallen solely on his shoulders. There was noone to push him anymore or tell him to go back. Everything he did was mechanical: clothes came off, the body plunged into the luke-warm water of the bath and soapy bubbles dissipated on the surface.
Eun Soo kept her distance. She wanted so badly to join him and wrap herself around him, to bring him out of these saturated with hurt solitude, but she held back with a throbbing pain in her chest. She waited for Choi Young to be ready to come to her.
She woke up as his weight touched the bed. He let out a heavy sigh, his arm over his eyes.
"You are sad." She kissed his eyes and felt tiny traces of salt. Tears, uncried and leashed behind a thin barrier of the eyelids from the outside.
"Love you," she whispered into the kisses, into the tenderness of her breath and the slightness of the lips, which hovered over. The touch was feather light, yet it permeated and nourished. It dragged out stubborn tears of denial from underneath the canopy of his fluffy lashes.
He let out a breath. And with that he let out himself from inside his cell of self-imposed imprisonment. His lips agonized in search of her skin, stumbling upon her chin. Startled at the first touch of his tongue, Choi Young immediately caught her mouth and took in a kiss of pure need.
She relaxed, allowing for his energy's fluid movement through her, gaining control over her body and embracing him with her soul. Choi Young shushed and his heat subsided. He parted from her lips momentarily to look at her kind face and tenderly found them again. Kissing and moaning at the electrical sparks which pinched and tugged, as their KIs made love while the man and the woman were vessels for this union of energies.
Choi Young waited for the silence to break. When will she pose the question to which he had no answer yet? "You are not going to ask?"
Here, my love, not now. She softly stroked his hair and he let out a slight moan.
"I need to see Mr. Kim." He could not look at her.
"OK."
Too much understanding could be hurtful. Right now, nothing hurt them more than the unspoken understanding that a drastic change was coming and that their time together was growing shorter, just like they feared in the beginning. The time was catching up to them steadily, with the winds from the Hwata's gate, with the winds of the past calling out to Choi Young.
"Stranger, there is something I have to tell you." Bare breasted she sat up in bed, making him shot up and tense. Red hair tousled after making love, clung to her damp skin and there were droplets of sweat dangling from her collarbone. He watched her intently, confused by the beauty she projected and the meaning of her words that clashed with the moment. Eun Soo slowly filled her lungs with air as if it was her last chance to take a full breath. What she was about to reveal meant no going back. She will lose him.
"Imja?" He moved to hug her, but she recoiled and quickly covered herself with a blanket as if his touch was somehow poisonous to her.
"Imja, why?" He mumbled huskily and now forcefully pulled her close.
Fear clenched her stomach between its disfigured jaws, and suddenly trembled, the woman looked at him with the kind of sorrow he only saw in Jae Su's eyes before his death. Darkness descended on his heart and Choi Young braced himself for his world to collapse.
. . .
"Please, come in." The man smiled at Choi Young like they have known each other for years. Familiarity in his voice and his expression. To his own surprise, Woodalchi was not put off by it. Whoever this mystery man was, he knew about Choi Young. And that recognition was precious. "Seat down. I'll bring some tea."
Choi Young looked around a neat room. It was clean and simple. All the walls were lined with tall bookcases, shelves stuffed with books of various sizes and colors. There were no decorations or pictures on the walls. This home did not feel like a place infused with the memories of generations that came before. It felt like it was an empty slate on which the owner sketched a basic outline for a dwelling.
Choi Young scoffed at the staggering similarity. His room at Woodalchi barracks was kind of the same. No personal attachment, only necessities. This man seemed also an orphan without a place to call home. At this age, he should have family, grandchildren even. At least some friends and relatives.
The only thing that stood out from the homogeneous decor, was a child's toy, a teddy bear, sitting on the clean desk next to a computer and some papers. It did not belong in this impersonal setting. It was scruffy and old, but it was kept with care and obviously was important enough to be displayed so affectionately.
Maybe, Mr. Kim had some connections in this world.
Before he despised the idea of seeking help from this man, but today there was comfort in the fact that some of the secrets might be revealed.
"I'm very sorry for you loss."
"You know?" Of course he knew. This man knew everything about him. The eerie feeling began to return. He should not let his guard down. He might be the most dangerous enemy of all. The one who holds the weapon of knowledge.
"You came to ask me whether what your friend told you is true."
"You say it as a fact, not a question."
"I have been waiting for you a long time, Choi Young. Truthfully, I don't know how much I can tell you. I'm fuzzy on the rules, they still have not been written. I learn as I go."
"Rules of what?"
"Time travel. History shaping. Sculpting the future, molding the past."
He got up and took a book from the shelf. It was thick and of large format. The cover was hard and shiny with a picture of a sculpture. He opened it up and flipped through the pages. The images were all very different. Not much for art or cultural knowledge, the book bore no interest for the warrior, but his eyes followed nevertheless. "It is hard to make something so defined from a clump of rock, don't you think?"
Choi Young closed his tired eyes before responding, "It was not easy for me to come to you. I believe you know it. Let's get to business."
"I can't tell you if you are allowed to change history or what will happen if you do. Or how to do it. I can't tell you that you should or should not go back like your friend requested of you. I can't tell you anything."
"Then what good are you?" Raised his voice Choi Young incredulously.
"I can tell you one thing – Eun Soo and you - are meant to be together. You will have a child. That child is very important. You have to protect him no matter what."
"I am sick and tired of all the riddles and oracles and prophecies!" Sprung to his feet Choi Young, emotions spilling out of control, he was shaking. "I hate it!" He slammed his fists on the table. Unlike the other times when he was enraged, his KI remained docile. It was pure misery, not anger that fueled him today. Choi Young was not a man who surrendered easily to anyone or anything. He fought against the predictions and presuppositions, but the words of the seer lit up in his mind, each letter burning, seared into his consciousness: "Live by the sword you are not, live by the love you will. Fear no death, fear no loss, your future's star is shining bright. Fulfill your purpose through sacrifice. Cross the time, cross the space, find your faith and keep it close."
"I wish it would have been easier on you," he heard some genuinely consoling words from Mr. Kim who respectfully lowered his eyes not to witness Choi Young's loss of control. The warrior still panting, gaze full of angst glanced at the mystery man. Mr. Kim had a kind face. He had a face of a person who had a lot of empathy for his plight.
"I'm tired of secrets. I like my life simple." Young sighed heavily. "You act like you care, but you only add to my problems instead of clearing them."
"It's true. Seems like that," chuckled the man with certain wisdom that could only be acquired with age. "You had a lot thrown at you lately, let's take is slow."
It was not annoyance, impatience or frustration that shown in his tone, it was yeaning for some clarity, hope for something that can tie all the disconnected pieces together, "You said you know me, how?"
"Will you trust me?" Mr. Kim trained his eyes on him.
"Trust you?" scoffing at the ridiculous idea, Choi Young started to laugh. "You must be crazy! Trust you? Why?"
Mr. Kim reached inside a drawer and took out a small round translucent object. He pressed an invisible button and a 3D image materialized out of thin air.
Choi Young jerked back in shock. Stunned into silence, he stared and his hand reached to make sure what he saw was real. He stumbled, "This? How?" What he saw was not possible.
"Now, will you trust me?"